A/N: Hello! Please review if you're able! This one might be my favorite from 1st Year...I hope you enjoy as well!

Chapter 9 - 1.9 or "Roses are Red"

Breakfast the next morning was much quieter than usual. So much so that the rest of the Gryffindor table was certain that the absence of raucous laughter from the end where James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter sat meant that another prank was surely on the way. The four boys, however, were oblivious to their classmates' suspicions, as they had spent most of the morning watching Malfoy, Narcissa, and the other Slytherins they had overheard the night before for any signs of strange behavior.

Unfortunately, nothing out of the ordinary had occurred at the Slytherin table all morning.

"This is boring," Peter whined as breakfast was winding down.

"Shut up, Peter, and look and see who Malfoy is talking to," said Sirius, pointing to the end of the Slytherin table.

"Snivellus?" James said. "What would they want with Snivellus?"

"Well he does know more curses than most of the seventh years," Remus offered. "Maybe they think he can teach them something."

"Maybe they can teach him how to wash his hair," sneered Sirius.

James, though, didn't laugh at the joke; he had been distracted by the sight of Stuart Bones, entering the Great Hall and taking a seat about halfway down the Gryffindor table.

"There's Stu," he told his friends, nodding toward the seventh year and swinging his feet around the bench to stand up. "I'm going to go talk to him. I'll meet you in Charms."

"You're gonna be late!" Peter warned, but James had already shouldered his school bag and started down the table.

Stuart was fixing himself some toast and unfolding a copy of the Daily Prophet when James sat down next to him. Surprised, he looked up at the newcomer and then grinned at him.

"Morning, James."

"Hi Stu," James said, sizing up his friend. He had known Stuart Bones his entire life, and it was strangely disquieting to have seen him kissing somebody. "Missed you all on Boxing Day this year. Nice holiday?"

Stuart shrugged and took a large bite of his toast. "Eh, you know how France is, and Mum's cousins seem to have multiplied tenfold since we last visited them, so all things equal, I'm glad to be back at Hogwarts."

"I just bet you are," said James, smirking.

"What's that mean?"

"I mean I bet you're happy to be back here with your girlfriend."

The glass of orange juice that had been halfway to Stuart's lips was lowered back to the table as Stuart now turned all of his attention on James and frowned. "I haven't got a girlfriend, James, what are you on about?"

"Are you quite sure?" needled James. "There was nobody you were happy to…reunite with?"

Now Stuart narrowed his eyes at the younger boy. "You know something, you little weasel. What do you know?"

James's smirk widened. "I know you got back to Hogwarts yesterday and immediately ran off to snog Bayle Kamana in an empty classroom down the Transfiguration corridor."

There was no embarrassment on Stuart's face, only shock, as his head wheeled from side to side to make sure no one else had heard James's proclamation.

"How in Merlin's name do you know that, James Potter?"

"I know everything," James said confidently, and Stuart rolled his eyes and went back to his toast.

"More than what's good for you, to be sure," he grumbled.

"Anyway, how long has Kamana been your girlfriend, Stu?"

This, it seemed, annoyed Stuart more than anything else James had said. "She's not my girlfriend. And aren't you going to be late to your first lesson?"

The Great Hall was clearing out as students hurried off to their first lessons of the day. James looked around idly and then shrugged.

"What do you mean, she's not your girlfriend? You were snogging her, weren't you? And aren't you going to be late for your first lesson?"

"She's not my girlfriend, we just…well…you'll understand one day. And I've a free period first thing. Perk of being a seventh year, mate."

James tried to wrap his head around this with difficulty, but did not dwell on it. Anyway, he had more important things to discuss with Stuart than the intricacies of his social life. Omitting the detail of the Invisibility Cloak, and making it sound as if he had simply overheard the Slytherin conversation while wandering the corridors, James recounted everything he could remember about the previous night to Stuart, who looked more and more troubled as James spoke.

"They don't know that you heard them, right James?" Stuart asked once James was finished.

He shook his head. "They've no idea. I…well let's just say I'm sneaky like that."

"As I'm realizing more and more," said Stuart darkly. He had abandoned his breakfast now, and seemed deep in thought. After a minute or so of silence, he turned to look at James straight on, with every trace of seriousness on his face. "James, it's good you told me this, but don't go telling anyone else, all right? I'll…I'll take care of it."

"What do you mean, take care of it?" James asked. "And what does it all mean, anyway?"

"Don't worry about it now."

"But…"

"Don't worry about it," Stuart repeated sternly. James scowled up at him, but Stuart did not relent. "Really, though, you're going to be late to class."

"Fine," grumbled James, rising from the bench and shouldering his bag once again. "You wouldn't want to be late to your snog-fest with Bayle Kamana, I'm sure."

Stuart only laughed and gave him a shove to the shoulder as he began to hurry off toward Charms.

Charms proved to be less fun than usual. Professor Flitwick had given the first years the hour to practice levitating quills. James and Sirius grew bored of this very quickly and after a few minutes, decided their time could be better spent levitating other things around the classroom, much to the disgruntlement of their classmates.

"That's all he said, to 'not worry about it?'" repeated Sirius when James finished telling him about the discussion with Stuart.

James nodded. "He's probably not thinking straight, what with his head in girl-land and all." Sirius snorted as James levitated Raeanne's ink pot out of the open pocket of her bag. "Anyway, I don't think it changes anything. We'll still keep an eye on all those Slytherin gits and see what they're up to."

"All right," agreed Sirius, who was busy levitating Peter's book above his head. "And maybe we should have some fun with Snivellus tonight, too. You know, under the cloak."

It was unfortunately at this moment that Sirius's concentration wavered and the heavy book came crashing down on Peter's head.

"Whoops, sorry about that Peter," Sirius said, but he did not sound sorry at all.

"BLACK! POTTER!" Professor Flitwick had evidently seen the incident. James lowered the ink pot gently back into Raeanne's bag as everyone turned to look at them. "That is quite enough out of the two of you! Detention tonight!"

Sirius and James groaned.

"So much for messing with Snivelly," James said under his breath.

Remus, who was sitting in front of them with Peter, turned around and gave them an irritated look. "How are we supposed to keep an eye on the Slytherins if you two are always in detention?" he whispered.

"Oh, Remus," Sirius said. "We aren't always in detention. We'll have plenty of time to watch the Slytherins and mess with Snivellus and explore the castle and do anything else we feel like doing. Don't you worry."

Remus looked as if he wanted to disagree, but thought better of it and turned back to his desk. By the end of the day, however, James and Sirius had each received detention from no less than six professors and would be cleaning bed pans in the hospital wing every night for the rest of the month.

The following weeks passed by in a slow-moving torpor of tedium for James, as he and Sirius did not, in fact, have time to prank Snape at all. Their days were filled with lessons, detentions, and every now and then, when they thought no one was looking, a bit of homework. Even the idea of monitoring the Slytherins had become mundane. None of them seemed to be acting at all out of the ordinary and after a week or two of watching them, the boys had almost completely forgotten about the meeting they had overheard.

By the time February rolled around, James and Sirius were practically climbing the walls out of sheer boredom.

"Let's DO something," Sirius whined one day at lunch. "Tomorrow's the first day we haven't had detention since the term started. We need to celebrate!"

"We can prank Snivellus," James suggested. "We haven't done that in forever."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "As much as watching Snivelly suffer appeals to me, I need something a little more exciting at the moment."

"We could explore the castle!" Peter suggested.

"I said something MORE exciting, Peter. Not something that makes me fall asleep just thinking about," Sirius snapped at him.

"Well why don't you come up with something, then, and stop moaning about it," Remus said. They all stared at him, surprised – Remus never snapped at them. James had noticed how irritable Remus had been the last few days, but just chalked it up to him being frustrated with James and Sirius never being around anymore.

"Let's go to Hogsmeade," James whispered quickly, before Sirius could provide an angry retort. "Tomorrow night, let's sneak out and get the supplies for our next prank."

"Now we're talking!" Sirius said, clearly appeased. "Tomorrow night it is. Pass the potatoes, will you Remus?"

Remus, however, did not move.

"Remus?" said James. "Hello? Earth to Remus?"

But he still didn't pass Sirius the potatoes. Instead, he slowly placed his fork on his plate and stared at the table, all traces of his previous irritation now replaced by something like…fear.

"I can't go to Hogsmeade tomorrow night," he said in a low voice.

"What?" Sirius said. "Why not?"

"I…I have to go home for the night. My mum is really sick and I have to go see her."

"Your mum is sick?" Peter echoed, confused. "You have to go home?"

"Yes. I…I mean no," said Remus quickly. "I mean, she's just really sick, but they think she'll get better soon. Hopefully, I mean…hopefully she'll get better soon."

"Well did she –" Sirius started, but Remus cut him off.

"Look, sorry, but I don't really w-want to talk about it anymore. Can we change the topic, please?"

"Okay," James said slowly, glancing once again at Sirius and Peter, who looked just as confused as he felt. "Well we can go to Hogsmeade later in the week, once we have the details for our next prank worked out. We'll need to get moving if we want it to be ready for Valentine's Day. Is that all right, Remus?"

Remus swallowed hard and nodded before speaking. "Thanks," he said softly. "For not going without me, I mean."

"Of course we wouldn't go without you!" Sirius said.

"Yeah," laughed James, "we'll need your help carrying all of the supplies back, anyway."

Remus jumped up from the table at once and pulled his bag over his shoulder. The other three just stared at him.

"I have to go," he said, still not meeting their eyes. "I have to go to the, erm, Owlery. Have to send a letter before Herbology. I'll see you there."

And then he turned and walked quickly out of the Great Hall.

"Well that was strange," said Sirius. "Was it something we said?"

"No." James frowned in the direction of the door that Remus had just disappeared through. "He's been acting odd the last day or so. I didn't know his mother was sick."

"Neither did I," said Peter. "Why didn't he tell us before?"

"No, something else is going on," said Sirius, also staring at the door to the Great Hall. "Something strange. I think there's something Remus isn't telling us."

The boys all looked at each other in confusion.

Two nights later, Remus returned to the Gryffindor common room weak, exhausted, and unready to face the questions of his three friends. Guiltily, he hoped they might not be around, leaving him free to sneak up to the dormitory and get some much needed sleep. His transformation the night before had been rough. If he were being honest with himself, every month was getting worse and worse. He shuddered and blocked out the dark thoughts that fought to consume him.

He had almost made it to the dormitory staircase when someone shouted his name and he jumped about a foot in the air. Turning, he saw James, Sirius, and Peter sitting at one of the corner tables, very obviously planning something. Remus sighed and regretfully approached his friends.

"Weren't you going to say hello?" Sirius said. His tone was more confused than accusing, but Remus felt his insides shrivel with guilt.

"I didn't see you here," he lied, not meeting any of their eyes. It was pathetic, really, how many lies he had told them since he had met them. What kind of friend was he, anyway? And then, bile in his throat, another spilled forth. "I thought that maybe you were up in the dormitory."

"Sit down," offered James, nodding toward the empty chair next to him. "How's your mum?"

"Erm, she's all right," said Remus as he sat. "She can't get out of bed, that's why I had to go see her."

Sirius narrowed his eyes. "Hmm. What's wrong with her?"

Remus could feel his face reddening and his hands starting to shake. He clasped them tightly together beneath the table.

"The doctors –"

"The what?" interrupted Sirius.

"Th-the doctors," Remus repeated. "Muggle Healers. They don't know what's wrong with her. She's just been really ill for a long time. My dad thought it might be a good idea for her to see me."

Seeing Sirius and James exchange an unreadable glance, Remus decided it was best to get off the subject as quickly as possible.

"What are you guys planning over here?" he asked in what he hoped came off as a calm voice.

"The Valentine's prank," Peter said in a dramatic stage whisper. "We have to sneak into Hogsmeade tomorrow so we can get all the you-know-whats."

"Okay," said Remus, knowing that a prank was probably the best way to distract the rest of them from their suspicions. "Tomorrow it is, then."

James grinned and clapped Remus on the shoulder. Remus tried not to wince at the pain that shot down his spine at the contact.

"Good to have you back, mate."

As the four boys crept down the secret passage toward Hogsmeade the next night, Peter voiced a question that none of them had actually addressed yet.

"Er, how are we going to pay for all of the stuff we need for this prank?"

Remus had about three Galleons in his pocket saved up from various Christmas and birthday presents, but that wouldn't be near enough to buy all that they would need.

Sirius and James, however, weren't concerned.

"No big deal," James said easily. "I've got plenty of money. I took it out of my Gringotts vault before term started."

"You have your own Gringotts vault?" Remus asked, flabbergasted.

"Of course! Don't you?"

"No," said Remus, slightly embarrassed. "I don't think most kids our age do."

"I do," said Sirius, kicking a stone along the dark passageway. "But I can't get into it until I'm of age, my parents have to get into it for me. James just likes to go round showing off how much money he's got."

"No I don't!" James retorted. "I just offered to pay for the things we need, is all."

"I've got plenty of money, don't you?" Sirius said in a high-pitched voice, imitating James and prancing around in front of them with his nose in the air.

"Oh, shut up Sirius, you git."

Sirius stuck his tongue out at him. "Prat."

"Dolt."

"Idiot."

"Nutter."

"Tosser."

"Pansy."

"Wanker."

"Toe licker."

"Scum licker."

"Slytherin licker."

With a scandalized gasp, Sirius mimed taking a knife and stabbing it through his heart dramatically. "That smarts, James. That smarts real bad."

James rolled his eyes and shot sparks at him. Sirius laughed and retaliated.

"Guys? Guys, can we go to the Three Broomsticks before the post office?" Peter said, which made James and Sirius stop dueling each other and look at him, mirth dancing across both of their faces.

"Always thinking about food, aren't you Peter?" Sirius laughed.

"No!" Peter said quickly. "I was just…"

"Hey, maybe that Rosmerta will be there!" James interrupted.

Sirius grinned as the boys climbed out of the fake sewer grate that hid the passageway and into the alley behind Zonko's.

"Three Broomsticks it is!" he said, leading the way.

Madam Rosmerta was indeed in the Three Broomsticks and she laughed heartily when she saw the four of them sitting at one of her tables.

"You four must have a lot of trust in me, seeing as how I know your names and I also know that you're supposed to be up at the school right now."

"We know that someone as beautiful as you would never be a dirty snitch!" Sirius said.

"Well lucky for you, I'm not one to shop students out. Particularly students who come to my place to buy butterbeer and compliment me," she laughed.

"We are in your debt then," said James, smiling slightly dazedly up at her. "Whatever you need, you'll let us know."

Her eyes twinkled as she surveyed them all before asking, only somewhat seriously, "How old are you lot?"

Remus gulped, thinking that their cover was surely blown. "We're…"

"We're fourth years," Sirius interrupted him quickly. Remus shot him a look but Sirius was too busy smiling up at Rosmerta.

"Fourth years?" she repeated, clearly disbelieving. "Well why haven't I seen you in here on Hogsmeade weekends, then?"

"We like to avoid the crowds," said James.

"Is that so?"

"Yes, we like it a bit quieter in here," Sirius said. "That way we can talk to you without interruption."

Rosmerta laughed again. "Four butterbeers, then," she said, turning back toward the bar before adding over her shoulder, "and you two are going to be quite the heartbreakers in a few years. You know, once you're actually fourth years."

The next few days passed quickly, as all of the boys' free time was spent in preparation for the Valentine's Day prank. There was a lot to be done and not much time to do it. Sirius assured them all, though, that the work would be worth it and that no one had ever done a prank like this one before. He claimed it would go down as legendary if executed correctly.

There was just one hiccup.

The night before Valentine's Day, Sirius, James, Remus, and Peter were in the Owlery, having just sent off the very last of the fifty or so owls that they had to employ for the next day. In fact, they had used every single school owl that had been there when they arrived that evening. Each of the owls had departed with one of their precious envelopes and strict instructions on when, where, and to whom the envelopes needed to be delivered the following day.

It was most unfortunate, then, that Professor McGonagall chose this moment to send a letter.

The boys were just about to make their way down the Owlery staircase when McGonagall appeared. All four of the Gryffindors jumped visibly.

"Good Godric," McGonagall said, clutching her chest. "You four scared me half to death. What on earth are you doing up here at this hour? It's almost curfew, you know."

Sirius looked at James, whose eyes were huge behind his glasses.

"We were sending a letter, Professor," he said with a squeak in his voice.

"We'll just be on our way now," Sirius said, moving to step around McGonagall. "Wouldn't want to be out after curfew."

"One moment, Black." Sirius and the others froze. McGonagall had just taken another step inside the circular room and had clearly noticed the glaring absence of the fifty or so school owls that usually perched there.

"What in the…"

"Yes, Professor," Sirius said, hoping to reasonably explain the lack of owls before she became too suspicious. "We got here a few minutes ago and there was only one sad little owl left in the entire Owlery. We sent it off to Remus's parents with the letter." He paused and smiled up at her innocently. "If we had known you were coming though, we certainly would have left it for you to use."

Professor McGonagall surveyed the four of them for a moment before her eyes narrowed in what was unmistakable suspicion.

"There was only one owl left? In the entire Owlery?"

"Yes, Professor," James said. Sirius was happy to note that the squeak in James's voice was gone.

"And you used it to send a letter to Mr. and Mrs. Lupin?" she asked, gazing down at Remus.

Remus swallowed. "Yes, Professor. Just a note to my parents. Nothing out of the ordinary."

"I see," McGonagall said, in a tone that suggested that she did not believe them for a second.

"I guess all the other owls are off delivering Valentines," Sirius said, before adding unhelpfully, "Tomorrow is Valentine's Day, you know."

"Hmm," McGonagall said. She was still looking at them with narrowed eyes and Sirius noticed her that her nostrils had a slight flare to them, as they tended to do when she was angry. "Well I guess I shall just send my letter tomorrow. Go on to bed, all of you. And I want no funny-business from you tomorrow, do you understand?"

The boys all nodded and raced down the stairs, putting as much distance between themselves and McGonagall as possible. They didn't speak until they were safely back in the Gryffindor common room, at which point they turned and looked at one another, horrified.

"What are we going to do?" whispered Peter. "She'll know it was us!"

"We're going to be in so much trouble," said Remus, who had gone very pale.

"Maybe she won't know it was us," Sirius shrugged.

Remus gave him a very disbelieving look. "Not know it was us? She's not stupid, Sirius. We're dead."

James sank into a squishy arm chair by the fire and ran his hand through his hair distractedly. "Well, there's nothing to be done about it now. The owls are all gone. We may as well have a good laugh tomorrow, since we're going to be in detention for the rest of our lives."

Sirius grinned at his three friends. "She has no proof that the owls weren't gone when we got there. I'll get us out of it. Don't you worry."

The next morning, however, as the boys sat down in the Great Hall for breakfast, Remus and Peter looked as worried as ever. Sirius couldn't really understand their fear – there wasn't much McGonagall could do to them. It's not as if they'd be expelled, and he was quite used to getting detentions and losing house points. In fact, the only thing Sirius was feeling that morning was sheer excitement for what was to come. They had worked hard on this prank and there was no way he'd let their hard work go to waste.

"Look," James said, nodding toward the Head Table. "Dumbledore and McGonagall aren't even here yet. Maybe we'll get lucky and she'll skip breakfast this morning."

Peter seemed to brighten at this idea, but Remus remained pale and twitchy, and did not touch the food that sat before him. Sirius checked his watch. They had only a few minutes until the first owl was supposed to arrive.

"Will you stop that?" James asked, annoyed.

"Stop what?" said Sirius.

"Bouncing your leg like that. You're shaking the whole bench, you git."

Sirius had not even realized his leg was bouncing in excitement. He ceased the motion and looked around the Great Hall impatiently. There seemed to be much more giggling today than usual.

"What's the big deal with Valentine's Day, anyway?" he asked. "Why do girls go all mad for it?"

"Because they're girls," James said, pulling a face. "They like pink and hearts and girly things."

"Eurgh," said Peter. "Girls are so stupid."

Sirius rolled his eyes at him. He was about to tell Peter that he, in fact, was the stupid one, when Remus pointed above the Slytherin table and let out a strange noise.

"Look," he moaned. "They're starting."

Sirius caught a quick glimpse of the crimson envelope being dropped on Snape's plate and straightened his back to get a better view. With the exception of Snape, no one else in the hall seemed to have noticed the Howler. That is, until it exploded with such a blast of noise that nearly everyone covered their ears and shrank away from the source.

"ROSES ARE RED AND VIOLETS ARE BLUE. NOW GO TAKE A BATH, SNAPE, YOU SMELL LIKE POO."

The Howler exploded into flames as the students broke into laughter around the Great Hall. Sirius had barely the chance to see Snape's mortified face, turning toward them from across the room, when another owl dropped a Howler right next to him, onto the plate of Halden Wilkes. It erupted with the exaggerated voice of a little girl.

"DEAREST WILKES, BE MY VALENTINE! I LOVE YOUR GIANT, SQUISHY, DOUGH-BALL OF A HEAD AND I AM SO VERY MUCH ATTRACTED TO BOYS WHO LOOK LIKE MOUNTAIN TROLLS. HUGS AND SMOOCHES."

There was barely a moment of peace before the next Howler exploded on Marshall Avery's plate.

"SWEET SUGARPLUM MARSHALL, I KNOW YOU'RE A GIT WITH NO FRIENDS BECAUSE YOUR NOSE IS STUCK SO FAR UP YOUR OWN BUM THAT NO ONE CAN SEE YOUR FACE, SO I THOUGHT THAT I COULD BE YOUR VALENTINE AGAIN THIS YEAR. LOVE, MUM."

The Great Hall was in chaos. Howlers were being dropped one by one to the Slytherins, and between the monstrous voices that rose out of them, the uproar of laughter from the other students, and the outraged screams of the Slytherins, Sirius wouldn't be surprised if someone standing on the Astronomy Tower could hear the din.

The Slytherin students had started running out of the Great Hall, for fear of embarrassment when the Howlers were dropped on them. It didn't seem to do much good, however; the Howlers were so loud that even as their recipients scampered away, everyone left behind could still hear the words coming from the red envelopes.

"MULCIBER, MY LOVE, I'VE ALWAYS FANCIED BOYS WHO ARE TOO STUPID TO KNOW THE PROPER END OF A WAND. LET'S RUN AWAY TOGETHER AND TORTURE PUPPIES FOR FUN! I KNOW THAT'S HOW YOU GET YOUR JOLLIES, SNOOKUMS."

After several minutes of complete disarray, James nudged Sirius, who had his head down on the table from laughing so hard.

"Look, it's McGonagall!"

The four boys all stared at the doorway to the Great Hall, where Professor McGonagall stood frozen, a look of utter horror on her face as she processed the commotion in the room. Then, as if drawn to them by magnets, she turned slowly and looked right at the four of them, appearing angrier than they had ever seen her.

"Oh bugger," muttered Sirius.

As she marched over to where they were seated, an owl dropped one last Howler onto Lucius Malfoy's plate.

"DEAREST MALFOY, YOUR HAIR IS SO SHINY AND SMOOTH. CAN YOU PLEASE SHOW ME HOW TO USE SHAMPOO? ALL MY LOVE, SEVERUS SNAPE."

The ringing in their ears had barely stopped, but McGonagall was upon them.

"You four. My office. Now."

They didn't need to be told twice. It seemed everyone in the room was watching them, the Slytherins with smug satisfaction, as they followed McGonagall into the entrance hall. No one spoke until they reached McGonagall's office. She closed the door rather loudly and stood, arms crossed, glowering down at the four of them.

"Professor, we –"

"I don't want to hear you try and talk your way out of this, Black," she said in an icy voice. Sirius swallowed. They were in for it. "I expect more out of my Gryffindors than finding enjoyment in the humiliation of other students. I am thoroughly appalled at all of you. If Professor Dumbledore were not traveling, you would be in his office right this instant!"

Sirius could feel Remus shaking next to him, and he felt a twinge of regret, knowing how scared Remus was at the moment. Out of all of them, Remus was always the one who clearly worried about getting into trouble.

"But Professor, we didn't even –"

"Don't start with me, Potter. I want to know, right now, which student helped you to accomplish this bout of immature foolery."

"Helped us, Professor?"

"Yes, helped you. Which older student procured all of the Howlers from the post office for you?"

Sirius risked a glance at James. Getting detention for sending Howlers was one thing, but they couldn't risk anyone finding out that they had been to Hogsmeade. They'd be expelled for certain.

"No one helped us," Sirius said quickly. "We got them through the post. Through owl-order."

"Well then," she said with an unreadable expression on her stern face, "if that's the case, then the full weight of the punishment will have to fall on the shoulders of the four of you, won't it?"

No one answered.

"Detention for all of you for the rest of the month. Separate detentions. Potter, you will be with me. Black, with Mr. Pringle. Lupin, with Professor Slughorn. Pettigrew, with Madam Pomfrey. And you will each write apologies to every single student you targeted today."

"What?"

"Professor, no!"

"Written apologies, you can't –"

"Don't tell me what I can and cannot do, Potter. On top of that, I'm taking fifty points from Gryffindor and I will be sending owls to all of your parents. I hope that the next time you decide to have a laugh at someone else's expense, you stop and think first. Now get out of my office, all of you."

Dejected and horrified at the extent of their punishment, the boys left the office. It wasn't until they were two floors away that they stopped walking and looked at each other.

"Apologies?" James said weakly.

"Written apologies," Remus clarified.

"Dear Snivellus," said Sirius. "I apologize for informing the school that you smell. Though I think they deserve to know so that they can steer clear of you."

James snorted. They all looked at each other for a silent moment before breaking into a fit of laughter.

"Did you see his face? He looked like someone had hit him with a stunner!"

"And Malfoy, when he got his Valentine?"

"And Lestrange, when it said that…"

"And Wilkes…"

"And Avery? From his mum?"

Not even trying to stifle their laughter, Sirius, James, Remus and Peter made their way to their first lesson of the day, all thoughts of punishments and apologies gone from their minds.