Bringing Xanxus to the castle after Timoteo had pardoned us was an adventure. He was the most unwilling jerk I had ever met. He was not excited to see his teammates, Lussuria and Squalo, despite their excitement to return home with him. He wore the same angry expression the whole drive home and refused to say a word.

"This is our newest officer, Hibari Kira." Squalo told him, "I'm sure you remember her. She's my… classmate. She was with the Cavallone Family up until recently."

Xanxus arrogantly drew his eyes from the top of my head down to the tips of my toes and snorted. He had no comment.

"I shouldn't have to say this but… she brought her own squad and everything. She's a valuable team member." He grumbled, "You're not allowed to kick her out."

Lussuria leaned over and whispered, "We usually don't have women among us. For multiple reasons. You were just so good, we couldn't forget about you."

I rolled my eyes and spat sarcastically, "I'm flattered."

Xanxus had no reaction to their comments but I should've known. This man is a ruthless mafioso and it was my fault for expecting anything more from him. The minute we got out of the car, he turned and lunged at me with his bare hands in front of the officers who had gathered out front to greet him.

I growled, clawing at the hands that had grabbed my throat, "Seriously?"

His crimson eyes glinted with murderous intent in the moonlight. He was testing me with his full strength and asserting his dominance at the same time.

"Milady!" Alpha was standing amongst the Varia's officers. In concern, he drew his gun and aimed it at the back of Xanxus' head, "Unhand her!"

All at once, the Varia was in motion. They turned on my team, blocking their way as they tried to come to my aid. I lifted a hand, motioning them away, "I can handle him!"

Alpha lowered his weapon, glancing back at Volore who had been cut off by Squalo and Lussuria.

I almost laughed. Alpha was the whole reason I was at the party. I wanted to know where he had come from but I didn't have time to worry about that now.

I kicked out, aiming at Xanxus' arrogant face. I was not unprepared when he dropped me, putting distance between us to avoid my blow. The minute my feet hit the ground, I was on the offensive. My fist grazed his face as it soared by and I twisted out of the way, barely able to keep out of his reach.

His arms were longer than mine and for a man who had been frozen for many years, he was moving surprisingly quickly but not quickly enough. It was then I realized. I'm faster than this man. He's just predicting my movements extremely well. Strength is equal parts brawn and equal parts brain. Xanxus was simply a man who combined everything to achieve absolute victory.

I snarled, my weight easily got off the ground and I planted a roundhouse kick in his shoulder. Surprised, he flinched backwards.

The blow had gone at him much faster than my previous attempts and now he knew that he was facing my full speed. He had barely gotten away from that one and he would not let it happen again. He finally showed me his strength-a sliver of the strength that the officers standing around us admired.

My arms came up to counter his blows and I felt myself being pushed back. I was losing the ground that I had earned myself. In an attempt to regain my footing, I spun my foot towards his face. His big hands came up and curled harshly around my calves.

He smirked and pulled me in. I only let the surprise hit for a moment before I folded my body in half to use his pull to my advantage. I curled my fist tightly and reached for his jaw. He was also fast to react, turning his pull instantly into a push that sent me flying backwards.

Ungracefully, I slammed right onto the dirt on my rear end. I only had a moment to regain my composure. I had always thought Squalo was strong but I could now feel that Xanxus was on a whole different level but Xanxus was also human.

I can win!

I was arrogant. He had let me move in and he had left me the openings so that my fist would come flying towards his chest at the perfect angle for him to block with his palm. His long fingers curled around my fist and there was no way I could've expected what would come next. His hand was radiating with heat.

I screamed out in a hoarse tone of surprise and utter agony.

I heard my own voice ringing in my ears as I tore my hand away from him and immediately my unharmed hand reached for my scorched fist. I looked up and froze. Xanxus had moved in almost silently, his right hand reached out and took firm hold of the place where my arm connected with my shoulder and his palm instantly burnt through my clothes.

I screamed and I could hear the guttural tint to my own voice that came from intense pain. Xanxus was fast to react to my distress. He kicked my legs out from under me and shoved me to the floor. My skull crashed roughly against the dirt as I went down and I struggled but there was nothing left for me to do.

Xanxus took a seat unceremoniously on my ribcage and that was that. As if he was the strongest man on the planet, he declared, "Trash should just shut up and follow me."

And I grimaced because that's all I could do. The fact of the matter is, I lost to Xanxus. I joined the Varia because I respected strength and I got to witness the strength they admire. It was frustrating to be on the losing end but it was also somewhat of a relief. I was reminded that, once again, I had someone I could challenge. In this group, I wasn't a symbol of strength. I was just normal.

"I think she gets the picture, boss." Lussuria was swatting their leader off my ribs and into the group waiting to praise and shower him with admiration. Despite his manic show of strength, they admired him and they were happy to welcome him home. The muay thai master squatted down beside me and sighed, "Well, I'm glad to see that you properly got your ass handed to you by the boss."

"Are you serious right now?" I growled, sitting up to glare at Xanxus' backside, "I have never experienced such a one-sided beatdown. I'll kill him."

"You can try." Squalo had stepped back and away from the crowd ushering Xanxus into the building. He turned, eyes assessing my wounds. He looked relieved but not for the reasons one might think, "I've never heard you scream like that. I guess you're not used to pain."

"Ha. Ha." I laughed dryly, "His hands were literally melting me. If he had shot me, I would've gritted my teeth and held it but he pulled off an inhuman feat. He blindsided me. That's all."

"We both have something we want to say but it's not going to happen with Squ-chan beating around the bush here." Luss huffed at us, offering me a hand, "Come on. I'll patch you up."

I took his offered aid and I pulled myself up, "If it's about the party, I didn't-"

"Thank you." The bespectacled martial artist put it plainly, "I don't know why or how you pulled it off but we owe you one."

He was talking about Xanxus. I knew immediately that both Squalo and Lussuria felt heavily indebted to me for my accidental "jailbreak."

"You don't owe me anything." I grumbled, turning to enter the castle without looking back, "I didn't do it on purpose. I should be the one asking why Squalo-senpai suddenly appeared. How did you know I was there?"

He didn't answer. I was stunned when he turned colors and began to yell profanities at me in no particular context. I stumbled when he shoved past me and stormed into the building without looking back.

I paused and turned my head to look back at Lussuria who was grinning like a maniac, "Am I the only one who missed something here?"

"I saw him with some woman in the courtyard." He snickered, "I'm guessing she told him you were going down towards the forbidden zone."

"Some woman." I rolled my eyes, "So why did he have to yell at me?"

"Who knows~"

O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O

My original plans to find out about Alpha were derailed by Xanxus' sudden return to power or so I would say but actually, nothing changed. Xanxus was extremely reserved. The only time we saw him was during meals where he demanded food like a picky child and ordered alcohol as if he didn't care if he had a working liver.

"Is he always like that?" I grumbled as I watched Levi closely following behind his beloved boss, "He hasn't said a word to me since I lost to him."

Squalo paused midway through a set of situps and heaved a sigh, "If you expected him to thank you, that's not going to happen."

"No! I expected another chance!" I snapped, leaning against the punching bag I had beaten a hole into as the beads spilled out onto the tiles, "Goddammit. I need a patch job."

He snorted at me derisively, "No. You need to stop hitting that and get a real sparring partner."

"Is that an invitation?" I got my hopes up for nothing.

"No."

"Okay, pal." I growled, "You have been avoiding sparring with me like the plague. What's your problem?"

He was mid-crunch when I questioned him and the result was him pitifully freezing up, uncertain of which way he had been going. He remained half-bent for a long, awkward moment and then he flopped onto his back and remained there.

I sighed, leaning back. The beads from the punching bag fell to the floor freely without my body to cover the hole I had made. It almost sounded like rain pouring onto the tiles.

"Why were you there?" He demanded, sitting up finally. His eyes didn't move once they locked onto me. He was making an expression I had never seen before, "I don't care what you said to Vongola Nono. Tell me the truth."

I hesitated. I didn't know if he would believe the truth. Even in my head, I thought my story sounded absurd.

I relented, "I heard a voice telling me to go so I went and there he was but the whole truth is a little longer of a story…"

He remained unwavering, waiting for the full tale.

"Since I got those rings, I've been having weird dreams. They seem so realistic and I… I had Koge look into Xanxus' location while I was still with the Cavallone Family." I admitted, "So I knew Xanxus was down there but then I started having these dreams about melting the ice. When I told Don Vongola that I was accidentally able to break the ice, it was half-truth and half-lie. In my dream, I melted the ice with those rings."

He didn't immediately discredit me. He nodded, leaning forward to rest his elbows against his knees as he took in the truth. He repaid my honesty with his own, "The reason Xanxus was down there is… we failed a coup d'etat many years ago. We wanted to take Vongola Nono and his Guardians down. Xanxus wanted to be the next boss of the Vongola Family. He might still want that."

"So…" I thought about it for a moment.

If Xanxus still wanted to be the next boss of the Vongola Family, he would have to either wait for Timoteo to die or he would have to wrestle the throne from him via a second coup d'etat. In that case, we would become the enemy to the current Vongola Alliance. We would become Dino's enemy.

"Are you with us?" Squalo wasn't really asking. He knew I had no choice.

"I am." I muttered, "Just promise I won't have to kill him."

"Cavallone?" Squalo chuckled, leaning back comfortably once more to start up his next set of sit-ups, "I'll do it. You have strange morals. You had no problem leaving his famiglia to die but you won't kill him yourself?"

I snorted, "Senpai, I'm loyal to the idea of strength not to any particular person. If he comes at me as an enemy, I'll beat him down just like anyone else."

"But you won't land the finishing blow?"

"Not on purpose." I grumbled, gingerly turning back to clean up the beads from the floor, "Is that going to cause trouble?"

"If our boss orders it." He said honestly, giving up on his sit-ups. He reached for a wooden sword in the corner of the room and tossed it at my backside. He grinned when I turned and snatched it out of the air with a huff, "I'm shocked to hear you're against it."

I curled my hands around the hilt of the wooden sword he had gifted me, watching him take up a second one, "I'm not against it but I'm not for it. If I was ordered to kill you, I don't think I'd appreciate that either."

"So you're one of those people." He huffed, taking up a defensive stance. He motioned for me to strike, "If you know the person, you won't make the hit?"

"I don't get attached to people very easily but once I do…" I gripped and ungripped the sword repeatedly, uncomfortable with the new weapon. I took a breath and held it for a three-count before letting it out, "I can't just kill them off for no reason."

He was satisfied with my response but not with my unwillingness to strike, "Kira, just fucking swing at me. It doesn't matter if you're good or not."

My father would be offended by the attempt I made. My mother would shame me if she knew I couldn't swing a blade. Both of my parents were masters of various weapons.

The minute I swung at him, Squalo made me look like an absolute novice (which I was) and it was humiliating. He swung swiftly at my side and proclaimed me dead before the blade was even midway down its path.

"If you were going to make fun of me, why even bother?!" I threw down the blade and went at him with my bare hands as he howled with laughter.

In my fury, I didn't notice Lussuria standing in the doorway nor did I see the smile on his mischievous face.

O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O~O

In the weeks that passed, I realized that Xanxus never showed up to training sessions or practice. He never even took any hits personally. I was starting to wonder why he was the leader of this bunch. In fact, I was curious about why he wanted to be the boss of a mafia family when he was the laziest man I had ever seen.

When I finally asked Squalo about him after months of serving as a hitman under our reinstated boss, the response I got was simple, "He's not a hard worker but he knows what he wants. In his head, the strongest man sits at the top and he's the strongest so he sits at the top."

I didn't say it out loud but obviously if he lost to Don Vongola Nono, he wasn't the strongest. However, I could understand the logic. I felt a similar way. Strength is absolute so the ones who have the most power should stand at the top of our hierarchy.

Speaking of hierarchy, Squalo was out on a very important mission and was missing a training session for the first time in forever. I wonder where he went without letting me know but really, I didn't care. I slapped my hand over Volore's face during training and drove him to his knees and proceeded to turn and wrestle Leviathan onto the tiles without missing a beat. I snorted at them as Volore gave up and laid back on the tiles screaming profanities.

"Really? Why do you kids bother?" Lussuria laughed haughtily at them, "In close combat, Kira never loses. If I can't beat her, how can either of you hope to stand a chance?"

Kira never loses.

I wonder when people began to say that about me. I felt pride swell in my chest. I had long since forgotten my pitiful desperation from my time with the Cavallone Family. I was no longer worried about my strength. I had proven my abilities time and time again after joining the Varia. I was no longer uncertain about whether or not I was deserving of my place. I had earned my title.

"Where's Squalo-senpai?" I asked, genuinely wondering where he had gone, "It's strange for him to miss training even if he was out on a hit last night."

"He's abroad." Lussuria seemed surprised that I didn't know, "He went to Japan on an assignment."

Japan.

The word echoed in my head a moment and I frowned. I forgot about home. I hadn't seen my family in years. I barely kept in touch with them anymore.

"We'll be following him soon. Don't worry." My companion snickered at me as he usually did, "Man, for someone who doesn't have feelings for the guy, you're awfully curious about him all the time."

I rolled my eyes, "Why do you insist on making those kinds of comments?"

"Because Squ-chan likes you and you seem to be ignorant."

I glanced around at the silent assassins gathered around us. They were waiting for me to say something. I suppose they had all known and they all thought I didn't know. I'm not dumb. I kind of knew about it to some extent and I was willfully ignoring it. I couldn't imagine anything good coming out of acknowledging his feelings.

"Oh, come on!" Lussuria threw up his arms in frustration when I chose to remain silent, "Nothing?! You don't care?"

Alpha looked up at me from the corner where he was polishing his gun. He was waiting for me to say something as well.

I sighed, "What do you want me to say?"

"Do you like him back?" Lussuria supplied a prompt for my line of thoughts, "Do you think about him that way?"

I shrugged. My relationship with Dino just happened because Dino made all the first moves. Until he kissed me, I didn't know I felt any sort of way about him. I suppose I was too young to really know about that sort of thing until it was already happening to me.

I had no reason to think of Squalo in a romantic way. He hadn't asked anything of me and I didn't think he would ever. I was comfortable with our friendship.

"Ugh. I give up on you." Lussuria huffed and stormed out dramatically, but he left the tension behind.

Needless to say, I felt awkward and ended up skipping the rest of our training session to hide away in my room. Do I really have to think about such a thing?