I've had a bad day.

It's almost like every time Nemuri leaves me the universe decides to kick me in the balls and today is no exception. Not only am I reminded of scars from Exes Past, but now I'm trying not to have a panic attack in the shower.

Nemuri's out on her patrol and every time she is my heart always leaps to my throat and I almost want to throw on my old costume and join her. Because every time someone important to me leaves I always think they'll never come back. I'm terrified that Dabi will strike and she'll be ashes but that's not all I'm angry at. I'm enraged at the thought that he was even back in the first place. I mourned him, I buried him, I replaced him.

Now he's back and trying to tell me how to live? After I pushed myself to the point of breaking and after I built a persona that could never break? Some part of me has some level of happiness at finding him again. But that day still burns in my head. It should because it happened yesterday, but I'll never forget that as long as I live. I messed up and now a target is on my wife to be's back.

I get out of bed and Sushi headbutts my leg. Nemuri's gone but her scent still dances in the warm spot on her side of the bed. It's almost like I can't go five seconds without sleeping without her being around. The silence is deafening but I focus on the purring of our cat. He's a sweet little guy and I check the trash. It's full so I tie up the bag and grab the recycling. Carrying them both outside to the neighborhood beyond.

As I throw it away there's this odd smell like burnt flesh badly masked by cologne. Or deodorant. Whatever it is, it's coming from the alleyway and also smells like garbage juice on top of that.

"It's been a long time, Koyurei." a raspy voice says, I whirl and there's a weird looking man standing there.

He's standing in the shadows watching me as I lower the bags into the dumpster. My flames leap to life and brightening they cut through the shadowy gloom to reveal-

Touya.

My twin.

I can't ever forget the face of my twin. He gives me a crinkly smile and my knees go weak just looking at him. He's standing here. Same height as me with purple burns and all with spiky dyed black hair but-

It's him. He has staples around his eyes and on his face, keeping his jaw on.

Tears sting my eyes, "Touya...?" I start forward before embracing him tightly, "Where have you been?" He's wiry and bony but still here. Not built like me.

"The long way around, brother. Knowing what evil lurks in the hearts of men." he pats my back, "All the while, you've been quite the firestarter yourself."

"What?"

"That stunt with Midnight, that's what I'm talking about! You n' her put the fear of God in Endeavor. That's what I like to see!" But I just fall against him, crying harder. Relief and betrayal thrum through the rift between us making it wider.

"All along, you were alive?" I hiss, "Why didn't you come home? We needed you, I needed you."

He pushes me off, looking me in the eyes, "Koyurei, you know why not. We were replaced the minute we weren't right for his sick dream."

I don't believe that, if he just came home I wouldn't be the hero I was. The man I was is dead. All there is are ashes where he once stood. I buried him but the Touya I knew would never give up.

He'd never forgive either. But this valiant savior act is just that, an act.

"Touya, I won't give up on you. You know that, we're brothers and we'll always be. Even if you're angry, you can live past it!" I squeeze his shoulders, "Please, Touya. This is killing you."

"You sound like Mom." he states, pulling away, "Go live your life, Koyurei. If I ever see you again, I'm sorry for what I'll do."

He turns, but then I hit him with the clincher, "Touya, what's your endgame? What's the end here? Killing him won't heal the scars you have, killing him won't fix what he's done!"

That's when he glares at me, eyes flashing with that fire that's so much like Dad it hurts, "Maybe I hated what they did to us!" he snaps, "What he did to you, what I saw... don't you hate him?"

"Yes, but I learned it was better to live past it, it took forever and the help of our family and the new one I'm making, but I can't stand seeing my big brother like this." I hold out my hand, "Just let me feed you at least."

He looks at me almost shocked, "You cook?"

"At least it's better than rooting around in dumpsters. Now come on," I huff, feeling his rough hand in mine. Remembering the days when we'd do the same thing but I was being led.

Getting back home, I get some utensils out as he drifts in, his smell making Sushi back off and hiss a little but as long as Nemuri doesn't come home things'll be fine. In hindsight I should've been more suspicious but I didn't care. My brother's alive. How many people with long lost relatives find them after so long? I almost wanted to call Fuyumi or Natsuo to get their butts over here and help me celebrate our big brother's return. But thank my lucky stars I still had some caution in me. It'd probably put them in danger too, and I'd rather die than do that.

"Nice place." he states, "Not swanky at all."

"Should it be?" I ask, "I wanted a place I could be happy in, and well..." he looks at the pictures of me and Nemuri all over the place at different spots in the country.

"You travel a lot, huh?"

"Oh yeah, Nemuri always drags me to all kinds of places. The minute she heard I never went on a single vacation she had a whole list." I'm wrapping up his favorite as he sits down. He looks up at me with a glimmer in his eyes.

Is he happy? Sad? Does he wish I could've gone with him? I set the bowl down in front of him, "I make anything you request, as long as I have the ingredients." a stiff smile and a tight tone force their way out of me.

"Midnight Diner?" he guesses, "I remember Mom singin' Omoide when we were little."

"That was Dad. He showed it to us, and he used to cook all the time when he was home. He used to sing it." I correct and Touya laughs dryly.

"Steel trap, eh?" he chuffs, "I remember Fuyumi's first Setsubun. Man, that was something." he laughs a little.

"Dad comes in with a whole ass Oni costume his Dad had laying around somewhere and then Fuyumi goes..."

"Raaa! Raaaa!" I mime with a happy, girlish tone, we end up laughing and he leans against the countertop.

"What was ours? Mom had the video, right?" I ask and Touya grins, "Oh wait, she DOES."

"You refused to let Dad hold you for a solid month." Touya smiles and I still see us when we were younger. Almost like that horrible day never happened. But the smile almost completely drops as he eats.

"I wish I could come under gladder tidings, brother mine." he says almost over dramatically but that's kind of been his thing. I know what he does and his eyes flash with that inner fire.

"I want you to call off the wedding." he demands it almost like he already knows the answer. Like I'd budge for him just for showing up in my life again. Fat fucking chance.

"How dare you try to make demands of me." my bravery rises in my chest along with my voice, "I lived my life by Dad's rules and the minute I get out you decide to come back and tell me I can't marry the love of my life?"

He gives me that same smile he used to, the one that was cocky and full of smarm like he knew something I didn't or did something that got the both of us in trouble. He crosses his hands and leans against his arms.

"Would you want more deaths on your hands? Maybe I should just stick around and meet her." his eyes grow pinpricked, "Maybe I could leave you as a charred little gift to show you I'm serious? We'd match!"

Almost instantly he ignites and my own flames answer with the same ferocity. We stare each other down like cowboys at high noon. The blue light tossing fantastical light on the walls.

Slowly almost painfully our flames wink out.

Then he stops, "No. No, I can't do that to you." he looks genuinely heartbroken "You're the only one worth sparing."

A chill slips down my back, "The only one? What are you-"

"Shhhh..." he touches my face with his finger against my lips, "Spoilers." Forcing myself backward away from him. He slinks right back into the shadows like he was never there. Traces of his rotten corpse-stench being left behind.

I'm back in the shower feeling the water running down my body. Closing my eyes and realizing what I have to do. It's not Shoto's fault that any of this is coming to him. I thought I could just walk away but since Dabi- no, Touya's back there's nothing more I can do. Either way my future was going to crash right into my past in a messy collision that probably will end with people dying. It was my fault that Touya became the way he did.

I should've kept him away from that thought, we could've found a way to be happy together right? I step out of the shower and hear Nemuri getting up. Her hair's a tangled fluffed-up mess.

She drifts towards me, "Change of plans..." she mumbles, "We're going to stay in today." Her hands linger on the small of my back and she presses me close, "We've been every which way, haven't we baby?"

I look away with a nod, I can't even look her in the eyes without thinking about what Touya told me. Call off the wedding or I'll turn her to ashes. Her lips press into my jaw and trace down to my chin.

"Koyurei. What's wrong?" draping herself onto me and the weight's comforting and soft like always. I take a deep breath and she already seems to know.

"No. I'm not going to call off the wedding because your Crow-reject of a brother threatened us." she looks up at me with a smile, "I love you, Koyurei. Always."

"I feel like I don't deserve you." I blurt out, "That I'm too much of a coward and it's just... awful." tears sting my eyes and that old feeling of how pathetic I am bubbles up.

I was a hero, I was strong, and everyone depended on me. Now I'm not a hero and everything falls apart. Yesterday I realized just how small I am now. How could Nemuri love a small, broken guy like me? Beyond the fire and beyond the ice what does she see in me? All that was asked of me was strength. I innovated Dad's Flashfire Fist, I awakened my Ice, but it was all too late.

So I cry.

Like a child I bury my face into her embrace. Her arms wrap around me and everything surges. All I knew was to be a hero. All I knew was living and dying was only seconds away from each other. I don't feel the heat leaving my nose, or the blossoming red spot on her nightshirt, just... all the emotions.

The fear, the relief, and the anger all flood out of me and she holds me tight. Holds me close even though I'm crying so hard I'm bleeding on her. My brother died and I saw it, I suffered through training for him, and now he was alive the whole time?

"I'm sorry... I'm... I'm sorry..." mumbling softly and feeling Nemuri kissing and cleaning my face off with a washcloth. She looks at me with that same sad smile like she's assuring me that everything will be okay.

"Koyurei, it's not your fault. You were a kid. You did the best you could." her voice is soft and soothing like it always is.

"Why wasn't it me, Nemuri?" My question falls onto her like a weight and she squeezes me a little.

"Because something kept you alive. Your own quirk did, right? I don't believe in anything divine but that's gotta be something, right?" her lips curl into a smile and there's this moment where I realize she's right.

"I mean yeah. I..." I feel her sweet kiss again and I lean into it, "Fuck, you know what to say to get me all distracted."

"Mm, well I have that kinda talent babe." she leans against me and smiles. There's always that comforting bliss that comes over me whenever I'm around her. I just hope that I can stop Touya before everything goes wrong.

Nemuri curls against me changed out of her bloodstained sweater into another one exactly like it as we tune into her favorite TV drama. It's one about two highschoolers that goes through the interpersonal drama of their lives. It's simple and sweet plus easy to follow. She puts up with GoRangers and I watch School of Love in turn. It's an equal partnership. Sushi curls against me and I scratch his ears. He's already purring like crazy and he's been a real cuddlebug ever since I had my breakdown.

It's nice. Domestic. Peaceful. Something that I'm still not used to but at the same time should be by now. I want nothing to stop this even now. Nemuri gets up to get something to eat and I join her. I wrap my arms around her and bury my face into her hair. She giggles and I kiss the side of her neck.

"Oho, clingy are we?" she asks.

Sometimes I don't want to feel anything but her love. Just throw all of it away and just fall into her arms. Or I lie there and feel it. Nemuri straddles me, smothering my bad feelings with kisses and gently sliding her hands over my burns.

"Beautiful..." she mutters into my ear, "My beautiful boy." her teeth gently sink into my skin. It feels like heaven. Every moment spent with her is. Every time I sink into her I don't feel so confused.

As long as we're together nothing can stop us.

That's when a knock at the door stirs us out of our near-lovemaking. Again with the people always interrupting? Damn, must be because we're popular. Nemuri slides back on her sweater with another knock on the door.

"Coming!" she calls walking up and pulling it open. I stay in bed not moving the minute I hear him.

"Good afternoon, Kayama." Dad's voice rumbles he's probably bowing his head, "I apologize for intruding."

"What do you want, Endeavor?" her voice goes from warm to cold in seconds. Not even that. He rises and from the crackling of his flames he's in his hero costume. Even the volume of the crackling gives me a good picture of how he looks.

"I'd like to speak to my son." That tone again. The same one that doesn't take no for an answer and is ready to just force it. He's never met a woman as stubborn as Nemuri though.

"I'll give him the message." she shoots it down even harder with arms crossed and all. Dad doesn't take no for an answer as I hear the flames die and the unlacing of his boots.

"I just want to talk to him. It won't be long." he states, "Now if you'd be so kind as to stay out of our way-"

Oh hell no.

I get up and march towards the door with a fire in my belly and the chill exploding out of me. Frost covers the windows as I stalk towards my father just casually trying to force himself into my life again. The rage makes me a different person, adrenaline floods every sense and every second, and my body acts on its own. When it comes to my wife-to-be there's no holding back.

Nemuri looks like she's about to clock him one but I beat her to it. I wind back and deal him a heavy right punch to the cheek. The feeling of his skin caving in on my burn-scarred hand is almost better than the feeling of victory I got in that moment.

Dad looks up at me, "Ow."

"I'm glad that hurt, old man." I snap, "The Blueflame Arsonist case was mine. Don't start coming to me about it."

"Well who resigned, son?" he growls, "Who gave up?" he wipes the blood from his lip and we glare at each other.

"I didn't give up, I just couldn't stand you anymore." my voice is chilling even to me, "So you either get out or I make you."

"Hmph." Dad grunts, "Fine. Just watch yourself." he laces his boots back up and stands with another bow.

"Hell of a punch, Koyurei." he says before leaving.

He's after Touya, and I'm after him too. Nemuri pipes up and makes me laugh with a...

"Well, at least you iced the house instead of burned it." she pokes my chest, "Now go clean it up."