Dawn

Chapter 9

Glorious Purpose

"I just want you to be okay."

Thirteen Years Later*

The god of mischief looked on as his progeny, the imp he thought of as his daughter padded towards the humble hovel of the poorest man in the village. The god had come to visit her earlier then he usually did. Something was happening to his child. And though he only gave blood and brain matter to return her to a viable condition he viewed as much of a princess of Asgard as he would if he had birthed the babe himself. His own understanding mother had given him permission to visit the monster that he and Freya helped create six years earlier. The poor child…something strange was definitely happening to her.

Though Elizabeth (for he knew that Goldenstar was not her real name) regressed behind closed doors and could never take a mate because of her mantle, and was a female at that was exhibiting classic mating behaviors of the animals that she ruled. She was wearing tartan dresses of flashier colors with shining gold accents especially around the older man. She was unquestionably showing her strength around the spinner as many males did to impress females, especially lions. Every time a doomed citizen of the village made a remark about the town coward, and those who had a death wish to push or shove the defenseless lame weaver, Goldenstar would swoop in and attack. She didn't even threaten to use magick, all she had to do was throw a punch or flash her teeth, roar or give a warning rake with her claws. He often watched with a smirk of pride from Asgard as his daughter unashamedly threw her crutches aside and threw hands…or paws…with anyone that threatened Rumple or his son. She brought him and the boy gifts. One Yule, the winter after the man's wife ran off with a pirate Goldenstar left handmade stuffed animals for the four year old little boy on their threshold and gave the spinner instructions to give them to Baelfire and to tell him that his papa had made them for him. He had to sell every scrap of wool that winter and had been so busy trying to keep them alive that he had nothing. What was especially telling was that she was bringing him food, instinct within her driving her to provide for him. All of these were clear signs that his child was in love. It wasn't the traditional love of an adult relationship, it was one of a child who was trying to find another family. Yet it was still love, enough to where her instinct was driving her towards those behaviors of impressing a mate.

Loki watched with his breath catching as she approached the hovel in the form of a lioness. In her jaws she was dragging a huge dead antelope from the Pridelands who had obliviously died of old age based on the grey around its muzzle. She placed it at the spinner's door. The god knew from the visits he made over the centuries that when an animal chose to forego immortality in her kingdom or who died outside of its borders, its body did not go to waste. Instead she honored its spirit by using every part of the animal to make clothing, the meat to feed the carnivores and omnivores who lived within the kingdom limits or on occasion humans who needed it. But this more than anything else she had done showed her true feelings for the spinner. She was bringing him food. She was providing for him. It was behavior of an animal who was providing for a loved one. She was also showing her ability to provide for him. Or at least she was trying to.

The door if one could call the buckskin curtain that separated the hovel from the cold cruel world a door was opened or rather pushed aside. Lokis jaw dropped and he held in his gasp. The man who stepped out was a middle aged man in worn dirty wool clothing, only disguising slightly his thin bony frame. Covered in the dirt of a hard life, his lean hungry body leaned against a walking stick. Yet his poor condition was not what shocked Loki. Oh no. Remarkably, even though they shared no blood relation and weren't even born in the same century it was uncanny. From his fluffy mid length brunette auburn hair to his short scrawny frame, to the warm brown eyes that they would have shared if she was still a human being, even the same height and weight and the same injury in the opposite side but in the exact same place…it was as if they were both gazing into a strange mirror, that turned young into old, man into beast and woman into man. "By the norms..how is this possible?" He whispered under his breath.

Perhaps it would be a coincidence but they showed similar actions as well. Rumpelstiltskin let out a long sigh and shook his head. "Goldenstar. Please. I said no charity. I appreciate it but…" Loki's green eyes widened. They had the exact same accent. Granted he was much more sane but his gender hadn't changed the voice that they shared. They shared the same stubborn nature too. And the same foul mouth. "Gods dammit, spinner." She sighed and let out a growl. "Don't be a mouse brained fool." Rumplestiltskin sighed in exasperation. Neither one of them were backing down. "What about my bloody dignity as a man?!" And with that the she imp started laughing madly and hysterically, a giggling peel of laughter that showed her lack of sanity…which caused a deep sadness to fill the hidden god's heart. Goldenstar had never been sane but this time it was the worst he had ever seen her. "Nyahahahahaaaaaa!" She cackled, letting out a peel of insane laughter that would make any Hyena envious. "Dignity won't fill your belly, dearie!!" She flourished her clawed hand in an animated fashion. "When's the last time ya ate!?" He avoided eye contact with her. "I don't have to tell ye anything." She raised an eyebrow and growled, her tail swishing back and forth behind her. "Look at me." "No.." the older man blushed, his head turned away. "Rumple!" She yowled. "No!" She squealed in frustration, stomping the heel of her knee high leather boots on the ground grunting from the pain she had just caused herself. "Just take the bloody antelope ya stubborn wee man!" She hissed at him, but a deep concern was written all over her face. "It's for Baelfire!!!" She yowled. She had won. A thoughtful yet sad look crossed the poor man's face. It seemed that the welfare of his son was the one thing that got through to both of them. She knew she had won. And behind that smug smirk on her face there was warmth and childish attachment underneath. He sighed, his warm brown eyes filling with emotion as he finally gave into his queen. "Just this once. But afterwards I mean it. No more charity." She seemed satisfied with herself and nudged the antelope towards him. He hobbled towards her, but this time he gently pat her on the head. The god watched with mixed feelings as she practically swooned. "Thank ye…" he said in a soft voice, cracking with emotion. "I haven't eaten for three days." "So I was right?" She teased with a smirk though sympathy and sadness filled her eyes. "Yeah yeah." The spinner rolled his eyes as she started limping away. Both of them were smiling behind the thinning veil of sarcasm.

Loki's amusement at their interaction turned to sadness however when he saw the shape his daughter was in. In the visits before, Goldenstar smelled him from miles away. She was still sharp as a tack. But now she seemed to hobble around aimlessly, her eyes tired, the past surrounding her like a shadow. She seemed to wander around the woods as if she didn't know or even cared where to go next. She staggered and swayed, the damage to her brain thousands of years ago seeming to effect her more than it ever had. Finally she had scented him. "Mother!?" She chirped, saying that word that brought the intersex god to his knees. He came out of the brush. Though others may have called her "Scar" to him she was still one of the most beautiful children in all the nine realms. He didn't see a queen or a sorceress, a lion or a cat demon or imp…he saw the little girl cowering behind her power, the the cub he had to give up so long ago. Yet when he looked at her now, he could curse himself for not driving the dagger right through Nimue's heart and keeping the child for himself. The only other person who looked upon him with so much love and trust was his mother. Goldenstar had an ability to see the true nature of a person's heart. Was he thrilled that she looked up to and had chosen the poorest man in town, a man who was the very lowest of the low, a lame coward? No, he certainly was not. But clearly she could sense something about the spinner that no one else could. Loki wanted someone to look upon her in the same manner. If only others could see her for what he saw.

She stared at him for a moment, drawing sharp breaths in and out before bowing before him as she usually tried to do. He shook his head. "No, child. You are a queen." Instead he opened his arms and spread his royal green cape, his hands reaching out for her. She stood there for a moment, her feet anchored as if trying to hold up her wall of defense that she constructed from years of being alone. Cracks began to show in the fortress of her forced strength. Her bottom lip trembled. Her eyes welled with tears. The first sniffles came before she let out a loud caterwauling of grief and pain, miserable and heartbroken. "MROWWWWWWWWWWW…" She sobbed, the pain that was hidden inside all coming to the surface before rushing into his embrace, the imp hugging his waist like a frightened child as she buried her face against his stomach, her tears slipping down his armor and soaking the leather and cloth in his clothing. Loki immediately held her tightly to him, shushing her gently like the infant she really was inside. The scar on her face might as well have been fresh.

Her mental condition was far worse than he could have imagined. This reaction wasn't one he had ever seen before. Something had happened. Other than the trauma she had gone through something else had wounded her further. "My darling…" he whispered to her, brushing his fingers through her mane and massaging the surgical scar on the back of her head, the connection that tied their fates together. "What happened?" He asked softly, continuing to pet her back. She shook her head but Loki gently lifted her chin into his hands. "It's alright. Tell mamma Loki what's wrong.". She sobbed without control into him, the collar around her neck the only way of him knowing what she was trying to cry out. "Zoso..the dark one…he…he doesn't want me. I'm not worthy of him…he doesn't want to see me ever again. He…h…hates me." Loki barely held back his rage as she explained in broken sobs and mewls what had happened and the entire events of her and the dark one's meeting. As she relayed the harsh words spoken to her he had to squeeze his fingers into his fist to keep himself from snarling with rage. Not worthy of /him/!? He had heard the words not worthy many times from Odin, and the fact that one of his children heard the same made his blood boil. The only thing quelling his rage was his sobbing anthropomorphic daughter in his arms, reminding himself that a show of rage on his part would bring up awful memories.

He just listened to her, his jaw squared and set, rubbing her back in circles and only opening his mouth to gently cajole and shush her. He could feel her small frame trembling against him. She was so weak. So exhausted. The cancer hadn't left her body and though immortal she still suffered from the ravages of the disease…yet her grief was what was causing her all this pain. Her knees buckled. Lokis eyes widened as she passed out against his chest, the little creature unable to go on by herself any longer. "Goldenstar…ELIZABETH!?l" the god cried out in alarm as she slumped against him. He lifted her up into his arms. Her anguish had forced her into sleep. She looked so tired and pale even beneath her golden pelt. She wasn't sleeping again. "Oh child." He sighed, tears forming in his eyes as he carried her back to the animal kingdom and the castle beyond. The god was greeted at the gates of the bleak looking large estate by a tired sounding Sarabi, the voice of a worried African queen mother coming from the old lionesses' maw. "Oh thank Starclan. Lord Loki. Thank you for bringing her back to us. She's been missing since last night. All she wrote was that she had gone for a walk. We searched and smelled everywhere. Timon and Pumbaa have been out all day trying to find her. I searched all over the land…but my old legs..and my sense of smell isn't what it used to be." The lioness rubbed against his legs gratefully. "Has this happened before?" He asked fearfully. Sarabi sighed and roared softly in agreement. "More frequently, since thirteen years ago."

Loki swallowed the lump in his throat as he carried her like a tiny infant to the west wing. He had known about her secret nursery for years and on many occasions during his centuried visits encouraged her regression. It was no shock to him. His maternal instincts flared as he laid her down and changed the unconscious she imp as if he had been raising the abused girl this whole time. He gently laid her down into the oversized crib, taking a moment to gaze upon her face as he swept her hair away from her scarred eye. A new determination filled his heart. He was told this whole time that he was not to interfere. Yet he was the god of mischief and lies, what did they expect him to do!? He was no longer following anyone's rules, this mother's love, penchant for mischief and protective anger stronger than any other law of Asgard. "Worry not my sweet one." He whispered in a promise. "Mamma will make this better. I swear on my life. You will not be alone forever. Not even for another year."

With that, he marched out of the castle, a staff of power carried in his hands, a fiery rage burning in his green eyes. Using his Sedir, the Asgardian magick taught to him by his own mother, he found out where the weasel known as the dark one was hiding. The man cloaked in black came out to meet him in the midst of the dense forest. Immediately, the bitter taste of rage burned Loki's silver tongue. He wanted to rip his cloak off and use it as a noose. He wanted to send him falling off of the bitfrost into the void of space below. The sound of the dark one's confident voice made him feel even more hatred prickling his spine. "Loki of Asgard. I've been expecting you." Primal maternal instinct met a penchant for mischief and resulted in an explosion of anger, of which he didn't think himself capable. He lunged for the dark one, his hand clamping around Zoso's neck and his thumb digging into his chin. And though he knew it would mean no harm to this creature, the god stabbed his stomach with one of the ritual daggers he kept with him. A primal scream of rage peeled from him. "WHAT DID YOU SAY TO HER!? WHAT DID YOU DO TO OUR CHILD!"

Zoso could only gasp between Lokis hand clasped around his fat neck. To the god he was a father who wasn't accepting responsibility for the life that he and his race created. And what more than that, he had to be unnecessarily cruel to her too. He still tried to defend himself. "I…d..did it to protect her…my master would have me kill her..you don't understand.." Loki only growled in response, his grip tightening as he twisted the knife into his victims chest to make a point. "Do not make excuses with me, worm! Even if you did it to protect her, what the hel was the purpose of insulting her and reminding her of the cruelty she once endured!? She's losing her damn mind because of your words, you… coward…you mewling QUIM!" His thumb continued to dig into the dark one's rough glittering skin. "She's running into the arms of some poor lame little man because she's so desperate for a father figure!! For anyone at all!"

Loki tossed him against a tree with disgust, the powerful dark one no match for a god. Yet it was like he wasn't even trying to fight back. Pathetic. He had some nerve calling Goldenstar pathetic. Zoso sat up carefully and leaned against the tree. Loki smirked. Whatever his master was doing to him, the dark one deserved every bit of it. "What do you suggest I do.." Zoso sighed and huffed, rubbing at his neck. Loki pointed at his feet. "Kneel." The pissed off mother of monstrous children snarled. This time Zoso knew better. Even Nimue had respected him in her time. With a scowl on his face, Zoso knelt at his feet, bowing his head and worshipping him properly. The familiarity he had with Goldenstar would not be granted to her counterpart unless earned. "What I demand you do. Not suggest. Demand. Is that you go home to the castle and take back every horrible thing you said to her. Take responsibility for the life you brought into this world. And still the dark one dared to defy him. "And what if I choose not to?" The god merely smirked, a wicked oily grin crossing his face, mischief dancing in his eyes. "Or I could slowly squeeze your neck until the sandman comes. Legend says that your kind does not sleep. We can test that theory."

He sneered with disgust as Zoso gulped and cowered before him. So harsh towards the little creature who loved him but here he was, cowering like a little snail. "You disgust me. You are not worthy of her. I shall find someone who is." Zoso's eyes widened in fear and the man began to realize just what he meant. This also disgusted Loki too. "You're going to have me killed." Loki grinned. "Sorry. No actually I'm not sorry at all, but you must die." Loki's brilliant and mad trap of a mind began to form an idea. It was madness. It was insanity. And it was the only way. He looked upwards towards the train that lead to the village and the spinner's humble abode. As much as his lowly station bothered him, he seemed more worthy than the pathetic slime who cowered before him. Goldenstar was far too proud to ask for help on her own. A delicate scheme to ensure his daughter's eternal happiness began to fill his mind. He grinned, turning towards Zoso. There was only one thing that could turn her upmost attention towards the spinner and one thing that could lock her and Rumplestiltskin's fates together. The boy. "Influence the duke to lower the age to fourteen for the draft. I will assure that none of the children are hurt. And in so doing." His eyes became softer, looking back up towards the mountains where he had no choice but to leave his baby girl again. "I will assure that she's never hurt again."