"How'd the feast go?"

"Aang brought Appa along and gave King Kuei a ride, so then he agreed to let the Mechanist make gliders and balloons."

"That's how government works here?" Katara asked dubiously. "You give the king a flying bison ride, then he lets you do whatever you want?"

"Sounds like you'd be a natural at politics," Sokka said.

"Right. And what will happen if we're caught doing this?"

He grinned. "That would be bad."

"What even are we doing? What is Operation Wall?"

They were walking along a patterned brick road to the university. Sokka, who'd slapped on a fake beard earlier, had a map of the campus in hand. He kept glancing from it to buildings as the passed.

"We've been trying to unravel the conspiracies in this city," he said. "Searching for evidence, interrogating suspects, taking down petty crooks and corrupt officials … A week ago, we raided an abandoned temple that was hundreds of years old, maybe thousands. There was a statue of a smiling woman with a plaque in old script we could barely read: Our merciful Lady Joo Dee. Maybe she's some sort of protector spirit? Or maybe she was a human who did something to protect the city, and she's reincarnated wrong into half the population? It could be the clue we need. There's a collection of old histories here that must have something about that temple, but they're restricted from public access."

"Are we getting in too deep?" Katara asked nervously.

"We can handle it," he said. "I've been at this for a month, I know what I'm doing. I'm worried about you."

"I'm fine."

"You spent a month trekking around the Fire Nation and the desert with Zuko, and when you told us what happened, you did that thing where you cram the story full of so many pointless details that we tell you to get to the point, and then you skip over everything you didn't want to talk about. The others might not have noticed, and it's a great way to get stuff past Toph, but I know your tricks."

Stupid selectively perceptive brother.

"A lot happened," she said.

"And you're probably never going to tell us all of it, I know. But it'd be nice if you told me some of it. I'm your brother, you know."

Katara forced herself not to fidget. "I spared Yon Rha," she said. Sokka glanced at her sharply. "I'm sorry, I just – I couldn't do it."

He pulled her into a side hug. "It was your choice. Did Zuko? He said that if you didn't do it, he would."

"Apparently it wasn't treason, there's standing orders to execute waterbenders, after one escaped from prison. Zuko was … I've never seen him that angry. But he let him go."

Sokka chewed on this.

"So," he said, "every time you've got yourself captured, you were marked for death, and it's a miracle you're still here."

"Why does everyone keep saying I get captured all the time?"

"Because between Suki," he counted on his fingers, "Bumi, that earthbender prison platform, Zhao, Zuko," he switched hands, "Fong, and probably Zuko again at least once more, who can keep track with him, you're kind of the village canoe: everyone's had a go and tied you up."

She made a gesture she normally reserved for Zuko and never when Aang or Toph were around, but she had to keep herself from laughing. She'd missed Sokka.

"In fact," he added, "remember that time I was twelve, and you volunteered to let me practise my knots?"

"I don't remember volunteering, but I do remember you cut off my circulation and I almost got gangrene."

"Good times. Just, promise me you won't get captured any more."

"It's not like I try to get captured!"

"Sure, I believe you," he said sarcastically. "What else happened? You didn't just walk along in silence for a month straight."

Let's see. We saw parts of the Fire Nation, and the people were surprisingly normal. When I was walking around that town, I saw funeral processions for soldiers from up north, and I get why Zuko was so mad, although I never told him because he was being the king of all jerks then. We met a waterbender who'd gone crazy and tried to murder Zuko, and me, who taught me an evil secret bending technique she used to break out of prison, which was directly responsible for what happened to Mom. After, we got back to the Earth continent, and we spent the rest of the month watching each other sleep. We rescued runaways, fought off Joo Dee Dai Li, and there was one time with a haunted wok, but we swore never to bring that one up ever again.

"On the way over, a sailor was harassing me, I think because I'm Water Tribe. Zuko was … almost sweet about it."

"He was sweet to a guy who was harassing you?"

"It was sweet how indignant he was on my behalf. He almost broke the sailor's arm. He was in a bad mood the entire trip, but he lightened up after we confronted Yon Rha. I think he knew the Fire Nation was evil, and he needed to get it off his chest, but was too proud to admit it, and being forced was exactly what he needed? He's been much better ever since. Even when we got into fights, he was helping villagers and holding back from hurting anyone."

"How much does he hold back?" Sokka asked.

"You figured that out, too?"

"When I fought him back home, he kicked me and I barely felt it. When we escaped Fong's fortress, he jumped as high as Aang can while wearing you like a scarf. And there were a lot of little things, like how he took longer to beat me alone than me plus Suki plus another Kyoshi Warrior. The second time he was probably worried about being fed to the unagi. You said you ran into Jet on the way in here, right? How'd Zuko do against him?"

"They looked evenly matched at swords," she said, "from what I saw, but I'm not sure Zuko was trying then, either. It didn't look like he was really attacking, just a few swipes to try to scare Jet off."

He frowned. "Why didn't he ever beat us? Was he really trying to capture Aang at all? I know Aang's really, really good, but … one solid hit …"

"Zuko doesn't hurt kids," she said. "He never said it, but I can tell. He pulled every punch. I think that's why Aang never had to hurt him, either, he could tell Zuko wasn't really trying."

Sokka mulled this over.

If you're thinking you hope you never fight Zuko when he isn't holding back … you'd be right.

"What about your group?" she asked. "How's Toph fitting in?"

"Not great," he sighed. "I don't think she's ever had any friends, or a good relationship with either parent. I'd sort of hoped you and Zuko would get back just so you could try to talk to her."

"I'm not everyone's stand-in mother," Katara said.

Sokka gave her a look. She fidgeted.

"And what about Zuko?" she said, changing tack. "He's nobody's stand-in father."

"He kind of is. Young man, you'd better start training by the count of five, don't make me come over there …"

She remembered him teaching her martial arts outside Agna Qel'a, tried to picture him doing the same for his son one day.

"But I actually meant," Sokka went on, "me, Aang, Suki sort of, we're kind of a clique. You too, now that you're back. Zuko isn't in it, and he never threatened her village. Maybe they'll click better with each other."

Katara considered this. She wasn't quite sure how she felt about it. It would be great if Zuko could help the Gaang more by helping Toph, but it was nice having him wrapped around her finger; the thought that he might start paying more attention to Toph instead bothered her more than she was happy admitting. "That reminds me, we had a change of plans for their mission …"

The change of plans wasn't in effect yet: Zuko and Toph lounged in their seats, as the train headed to the Lower Ring.

"How are we doing this?" Toph asked, keeping her voice down so other passengers couldn't overhear. "The longer we wait, the further we have to go to get back home."

"So be it." The train was still more than half full. "Privacy is good. We're probably going to the end of the line. We can handle it. It'll be a lot easier getting into the Middle and Upper Rings with an earthbender."

"You know earthbenders can tell when other people earthbend, right? I can make tunnels, but any benders nearby will know."

"I have a plan."

"Whatever, as long as you have something." She stretched out. Then, quietly, "Hey, what's the worst name your people have for someone from the Earth Kingdom? If we call them ashmakers, they must have something really good for us."

He looked at her askance. "I'm not teaching a ten-year-old swear words."

"I'm twelve, and I used to fight at Earth Rumble. I probably know more than you do."

"I spent three years with sailors, and I've met Ty Woo. You really don't."

"So obviously it never did you any harm."

"And my life is sunshine and rainbows."

"Stop whining. What's the problem?"

"The problem is Katara will string me up by my thumbs."

"Then I'll tell her you taught me all the other swears I know. Unless you tell me this."

Zuko winced. "Do you think I'll ever meet a girl in any context who isn't a constant pain in my butt?"

"I doubt it."

He let out a sigh. "Okay, fine. But you have to promise never to tell Katara, and you can't ever say it until you turn fifteen, and even then, no more than once a year."

"I'll definitely do that," said Toph.

"The very worst name," Zuko said, lowering his voice, "I have ever heard anyone call someone from the Earth Kingdom – and you can never ever let anyone know you heard it from me –" he leaned in closer and closer and quieted until he was murmuring in her ear "– the worst name I've heard from men who spent years campaigning against them, the worst word I've ever heard for anyone ever – is – earthbender. Ow!" he exclaimed, yanking his arm back and rubbing it.

"Bun tyen-shung duh ee-dway-ro," she said, massaging her knuckles, but she couldn't quite keep a smile off her face. "If you won't tell me about that, how about you tell me about a certain ~Water Triber instead," she lilted.

"You're too young for that too," he said.

"… What?"

"Besides, he has at least three other girls after him, if you count Ty Lee. Why do you all fancy him so much? He's not that good-looking."

"I –" Toph went red. "Not Sokka, you numbskull! Katara!"

"Really?! Wow. Uh … not that there's anything wrong with that … I guess. But she prefers guys."

"Yes! Guys! Like you!"

Zuko blinked.

"Oh," he said. "Right. That's what you meant. That … would make sense. Um. I don't –"

"Remember how I can tell when people are lying?" she said. "By feeling physical reactions? I can feel other physical reactions, too. I know when someone's near their crush. Don't try to tell me you don't like her."

Note to self: string up hammock.

"Fine," he said. "I admit it. She's … alright once you get to know her. But it doesn't matter," he added, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice, "because nothing's ever going to happen between me and her, so you might as well forget about it."

"Except that I can also tell when she's near the one she has a crush on," Toph said impatiently, folding her arms, "and guess what, it's you. She likes you back. You are the one she likes, is any of this percolating through that thick skull of yours or do I have to ram it –"

"It's percolating," he said, raising his hands placatingly. "But you're wrong. Katara hates me."

"No she doesn't," she said, scrunching her face up in disbelief. "Bickering with you is how she shows affection."

"It's not how she shows affection with the Avatar or her brother."

"Yeah. Think about that. Anyway, why would she hate you?"

"It's a long story."

"This is a long train line."

He sighed. "I attacked her village, chased her and the Gaang halfway across the world, there was one time when I tied her to a tree –"

"And then?" Toph prompted, a salacious grin on her face.

Zuko inhaled saliva and had a coughing fit. "And then nothing! There was a gang of pirates, and –"

"Oh my."

"– and I was strictly professional! I've never once tried anything with her!"

"You've been travelling with her for months and never tried anything?" She snickered. "No wonder she's always mad at you. She's a teenage girl, Sparky, and you're the only boy around who isn't her brother."

Zuko spluttered. "You're twelve. Who's been talking like that around you?"

"Pretty much everyone," Toph said. "When you're blind, people assume you're deaf and stupid, too. You should hear the Earth Rumble locker room talk."

"They let a twelve-year-old girl into the men's locker rooms?"

"Ew! No, I eavesdropped. I was bored."

"I'm not the only boy around, anyway," he said. "What about the Avatar?"

"What about her?" Toph replied, not missing a beat.

Oof.

We should lock her in a room with Azula and Ty Woo sometime.

No we shouldn't. I can't imagine anything worse than those three collaborating on a diss track. Which you know would be targeted at us.

"Come on," Toph said, "just tell her how you feel. What're you so afraid of?"

"Her telling me to push off and holding it against me for the next four months, because she very obviously doesn't fancy me."

Toph harrumphed and rolled her eyes. "Fine, then I'll do it."

"Don't you dare! Anyway, I'll just tell her you're lying."

"Who d'you think she'll believe, the guy who kept quiet about Azula, or –"

"The girl who said her parents agreed to let her join the Gaang?" Zuko parried.

"What about it?" she asked. Butter wouldn't melt in her mouth.

"My father had a sink-or-swim parenting style at the best of times, but he still didn't send me away without a ship and crew and stipend. You went off with a scatter-brained monk with a ten-thousand-gold bounty on his head, without a send-off, a bodyguard, or shoes. The others might not know how aristocrats do things, but I do."

Toph sat back. "Your parents gave you teachers," she said enviously, "let you go on adventures …"

"Be careful what you wish for," he said. "There are worse things than an easy life."

"Easy," she repeated. "Every second, I had to do exactly what they said, say the right things, show the right emotion, wear the right clothes, which is really hard when they all look the same …"

Hmm. Does she think we're naked right now? If her seismic sense is precise enough for combat, she has to be able to sense people's stances, and it has to hold up even if they wear loose robes, meaning she has to have a detailed 3-D –

Changethetopicchangethetopicchangethetopic

"I know you've run away twice, counting this time," Zuko said. "I get the feeling it's been more than that."

"Yeah," Toph said. "The first time was when I was five. I'd had this really long lecture about comporting myself better, and it was at the end of a week of that sort of junk …"

Hang on, she's using us as a therapist? She must be desperate.

We're the worst person in the world for this! What do we do?!

What would the Avatar do? He's better at person stuff.

'Let's go chasing butterdragonflies!'

Sokka?

Do you really want to go there?

Katara?

Probably tell her off for being irresponsible, something something hope, and blame the Fire Nation. What would you do?

Why're you asking me?! What would you do?!

"Mm," he said, which was all the encouragement Toph needed.

"… this one tutor, Lady Ming-Xua, who used to go on at me over everything, and this was before I figured out seismic sense, so I couldn't even see half …"

Some miles away, Katara and Sokka were hiding in a row of bushes, spying on a large sandstone building.

"That's the cultural history library," he whispered. "We have to get in, find any books on the old temple, and get out. I have a list of titles, here, I made you a copy." He handed over a slip of paper, and she scanned the names.

She looked up. There were windows with wire mesh. She pictured Zuko scaling the wall like a ladder with her on his back, tearing out the mesh, and getting inside in moments. Then she pictured Sokka not being able to climb with her weight, her not being able to reach any handholds, then when they did somehow make it up there, him not being strong enough to get it open and her not being able to bend a proper ice knife without losing her grip and falling.

"Okay, here's the plan," Sokka said. "You pretend to be choking on a bit of gold jewellery. When the guard comes to help, act ditzy, and try to get him to think he could steal it. With him distracted, I'll –"

"Excuse me," said a watchman, walking up behind them, "are you two students here?"

"We're visiting academics," Sokka said, standing up smoothly.

"Water Tribesfolk aren't allowed in the Middle Ring," the guard said suspiciously. "Where are your papers?"

"There's been a misunderstanding," Sokka said. "Water, earth, fire, air, boomerang. Long ago, the five elements lived in harmony. Then, everything changed when the Water Tribe attacked."

Katara plastered on a smile.

I'm going to murder him in his sleep. That, or short-sheet him.

Why not both?

"My people were all but wiped out in the war," Sokka continued earnestly, "and the few survivors intermarried to survive. Now, I'm the last remaining boomerangbender, and the element has been so forgotten most people think there are only four." He took out his boomerang and began spinning it in figure eights. "Without all five elements, the Avatar can never truly restore balance to the world. I could teach him the basics, but without the boomerangbending scrolls that I believe are in this very building, he can never truly master, you're not buying this are you, Katara!"

She whipped out a splash of water and froze the guard solid. Sokka stole a set of keys from his belt, and they ran for the building.

"That was your cover story?!"

"It sounded better in my head."

"Yeah, I bet!"

Sokka opened the door, locked it behind them, and they ran through a hallway of shelves of books and scrolls. He counted off the sections.

"Here," he said, skidding to a stop. "Grab anything that looks good. Let me think how we'll get out if he sounds the alarm …"

Some miles back, the train came to a stop at about the same time as Toph's monologue.

"This is the end of the line," Meng Dee announced. "All passengers must disembark." The last few passengers filed off.

Zuko stood, cutting off Toph's soliloquy. "I'm sorry," he told Meng Dee, "but my partner's blind, and she lost her ring. It's valuable. Can't you help us look for it?"

"Of course," Meng Dee said.

They swept the train back and forth, letting the other passengers get out of earshot.

"I'm sorry," she said, "but I must lock up this train now. You can submit a lost property report to the watch."

"We'll be sure to do that," Zuko said, and he dashed at her. At the same moment, Toph swept her leg, sending a ripple of earth through the train and tripping Meng Dee forward; Zuko, surprised, tried to skid to a stop, and somehow Meng Dee headbutted his kneecap as she went down.

"Ow! Shoot!" He rubbed his knee.

"Don't be a baby," Toph said, stepping forward. "She got the worst of it."

Zuko picked Meng Dee up, seeing a black eye and a trickle of blood at her nose.

"Katara's going to kill me," he said. "I was going to put her in a sleep hold!"

"Isn't that an illegal move?" Toph asked.

"Yeah, because kneeing a ten-year-old in the face is so much better. Never mind, just start pushing this train. We're going express back to the Upper Ring."

"And what's your genius plan when they ask what a train's doing where it's not supposed to be with one underage girl pushing it?"

"Do you have your passport on you? Good. Switch clothes with her, I'll stand guard. Joo Dee and I are getting Toph Beifong to the Avatar's house so Katara can give her emergency medical care. She tripped and hurt herself because she's blind and also deaf and stupid."

"If this hurts my street cred, I'm coming for you," Toph said, unbuckling her sash.

They got back to the house at the same time as Katara and Sokka: Zuko carrying an unconscious girl wearing Toph's clothes over one shoulder; Toph wearing the girl's Joo Dee clothes, crooked, spattered from Meng's nosebleed; Katara with a fake baby belly full of stolen books; Sokka sporting a monocle and fake beard. They shared a moment of silence, then went inside.

"Nice job beating up a little girl," Katara said.

"Do you ever worry maybe you're taking motherliness too far?" Zuko asked.

"I suppose I should be grateful you didn't blow her down and clap her in irons."

"The worst part is you got pregnant while you were with your brother."

"Are they always like this?" Toph asked.

"You have no idea," Sokka said.

OMAKE

"Did you find anything interesting yet?" Katara asked.

Sokka lowered the book they'd stolen. "Yeah," he said, "the script for canon. You get kidnapped a lot. Can't you have a normal vice, like cactus juice or something?"

"I'm sure it's not that bad …"

"On top of everything before Zuko joined us, and also Fong, that happened both times, you get nabbed by June, Long Feng, Ty Lee, and some guy called Sparky Sparky Boom Man. Not counting one time Mai pins you to a tree, but Appa saves you before you get dragged off."

"How many of those times do you get kidnapped too?" Suki asked, trying to read over his shoulder. "Or Aang?"

"That's not important," Sokka said, pulling the script flat against his chest so she couldn't read it.

"I thought what we had was special," Zuko said, hurt, "but you'll let anyone who can fog a mirror carry you off, won't you."

"What," Katara said, "no, Zuko, don't be like that – yes, I made mistakes, but what we have is special – and you can't talk, you've kidnapped everyone else in the Gaang at least once –"

"He's never kidnapped me," Suki said.

"He hasn't kidnapped you yet," Aang corrected.

"Well," Zuko said, angry now, "since apparently I have to take a number to capture you, maybe I should –"

"Zuko, please, we can work through this – don't storm off, talk to me –"