Hobbits on Your Boat by Bob the Bard
In the ports of Saffin the sailors have a saying,I don't know if it's true.
Make your own judgement after this tale is through.
Ohhh DON'T LET A HOBBIT ON YOUR BOAT OR IT WON'T FLOAT.
Send them right back or a kraken will attack.
The rats will flee with an unnatural speed.
Wind will drop off then pirates will attack.
The crew will spew because they livened up the food.
Cast them ashore before death comes knocking on the door.
Guard the tiller or the reefs will be through the floor.
Don't let them scamper in the rig.
Safer to throw them in the brig.
But they never ever stay there…..
Ohhh YOU NEVER LET A HOBBIT ON YOUR BOAT.
Cause if you do you won't stay afloat.
Unknowingly causes the ships demise.
Havoc waits behind their innocent guise.
Shoeless feet race up the gangway.
While rats jump ship to swim away.
Into the rigging they scamper.
Crew's duties they will hamper.
Curious minds make nimble tiny fingers go.
Lose ropes and stitching no one else knows.
Scolded from the rigging and sent below.
Exploring and poking setting the final blow.
Ohhh YOU NEVER GIVE A HOBBIT A RIDE.
The ill-fated ship sailed on the tide.
The safety of the ports was soon out of site.
Sea gods hide as the fates seal their plight.
When next a storm rises up and winds blow.
The rigging fails sending the sails low.
Waves lashing the ship blow after blow.
Weakened hull sending sailors to bail.
But they cannot find even a single pail.
The mast is cracked loose seams in the sails.
Fetch the spare sails but their search will fail.
Ship now foundering it will not last.
The dinghy's broken by a fallen mast.
The oars are missing; spare rope is too.
Abandon ship says the captain to crew.
Another ship and crew met their fate.
Except some Hobbits found quite late.
On a raft made of buckets and oars they say.
Tied with spare rope and a sail billowing away.
Singing a merry tune and fishing lines on their toes.
They bring a disastrous fate all sailors should know.
Helping you visit Davy Jones locker far below.
Ohhh NEVER EVER LET A HOBBIT ON YOUR BOAT.
Cause if you do you won't stay afloat.
Unknowingly causing the ships demise.
Havoc waits behind their innocent guise…