As Subaru and his group of harem returned to the mansion, he was met with Ram.
Ram said "hello rapey hero,"
Then subaru said "Please dont ask to join my harem"
Ram responded "Sorry but my preference are clowns, and your not that type of clown."
"Anyways, i let you know the owner of the mansion, michael jackson, isnt at the mansion, but at the sanctuary"
Subaru looked around and back to her "Soo, where is this sanctuary?"
She shrugged "I don't know, but Michael jackson has called another better maid named Frederica, and her only purpose is to piss you off and lead you to said sanctuary" The pink haired one pulled out Frederica from her pocket and positioned her next to herself.
"Hello rapey hero, i am Frederica, a maid that came out of nowhere for plot convenience and now ill lead the way"
They all held hands and they started to skip towards the sanctuary while singing "La la la"-
"Wait!" Ram yelled and the group of harem stopped, subaru turned around
Ram pulled out Petra in maid clothes from the inventory, and threw her to Subaru "Take her, and goodbye" Ram turned around and dissappeared.
Petra looked up to subaru "Can i be your next love interest"
Subaru looked dead in the eye of petra "Your 12"
"But i promise i won't make you into a pedo"
"No"
"bUT"
"GET OUT"
Petra frowned as she slowly looked away and walked towards the mansion
The harem and subaru exchanged glances "Alright, lets go to the sanctuary to kick that clown's ass" Subaru said, before holding hands with everyone else and skipping towards said sanctuary
As they reached the forest's edge, Frederica stopped prompting everyone else to stop too.
She howevered remained still, then she started to scratch her head "Shit, i forgot my script" she said as she pulled out a clipboard with what was the plot about
"Oh yeah" She turned to Emilia "I need to give you my necklace, which will glow and make you pass out for unknown reasons once you pass the barrier"
"Sweet" Emilia said "Ill take it" she snatched the necklace from Frederica and wore it and she turned to the other women "Do i look good?"
"No" all the other women responded in unison
"Well, anyways, rapey hero, lets go in"
They all hold hands togheter and started to skip through the forest,
suddendly Emilia's necklace started to glow, she turned to subaru "Hey, this is your cue to throw the necklace"
Subaru snatched the necklace and threw it into a nearby pond.
Then a woman with white hair and witchy face appeared on top of the necklace, her name is Echidnut "Bitch how dare you throw me into a lake"
She teleported towards subaru and the harem "Time to make you all pass out"
Echidnut slapped all of them and made them pass out, and threw them across the sanctuary. She looked at Subaru "Time to meet me, the next best girl"
She grabbed subaru and threw him into a bag and dissappeared.
As subaru woke up and found himself in a grassfield, he saw there was echidnut on top of a hill with a tea party set.
"Welcome rapey hero to my house, now, have a seat"
Subaru climbed the hill and sat down. "So what"
"Heres my plan to solidify myself to become best girl" She slid a cup towards subaru
"By letting my drink my urine."
Subaru stared at the cup infront of himself, "Deal, best girl."
Subaru took the cup of tea and pulled back and drank the cup.
Then echidnut started to say "Now, im gonna traumatize you by talking all the other witches in your presence."
Subaru shat his pants "Shit im scared now."
"Sooo, can i be love interest?" Echidnut asked.
"No. I like emilia even though i know nothing about her"
"I'll show you my feet and make you eat my pussy-
Subaru gave thumbs up "Deal!"
Echidnut stood up "Alright, now that im best girl and love interest-"
Echidnut grabbed subaru and a portal appeared "GET OUT"
She threw him onto a portal and subaru screamed
Subaru woke up, with the harem fighting garfield
Garfield yelled "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ALL HERE, ACCORDING TO THE PLOT YOU ALL SHOULDNT EVEN BE HERE"
Elsa "Bitch boy i wanted to fight you earlier than im supposed to" her blade clashes with his
Rem responded "I shouldnt even be existing now"
Emilia looked at a clipboard with the plot written on it "Well, according to the plot, i should be unconcious or something anddddd.. Crusch should even be here"
Crusch holding a dildo to Felix's face said "Really? Well, im here anyways" Crusch looked at Felix "Say aaaaaaa"
Felix then said "aaaaaaa" and thrusted the dildo down his throat, and felix fell to the side and held his own neck.
Crusch then said to everyone "Oh hey girls, Felix is choking-"
Then Felt out of nowhere she said "Who cares! Girls! Rapey hero is coming, quick, everyone to their position!"
Emilia frontflipped onto the carriage and head-dived onto the seats to act unconcious and everyone else dissappeared, and Otto appeared infront of
Garfield looked at Otto "WHy the hell you appeared now? You should have been here all along"
Otto then responded "Well, you tell me. author forgot that i, best boi, exist. So shut up and just start beat me up" Otto crossed his arms
Garfield shrugged, and started to fuck Otto in a violent manner, not sexual manner.
As subaru woke up "Holy shit, best boy is getting beated up, along with the other best girl, petrasch, which the author has forgot to include in my harem!"
Garfield body slams petrasch and Otto, onto the floor.
"Oh hello boss!" Garfield said to Subaru
Then Crusch appeared behind a foliage and yelled to Garfield "You idiot! You suppose to call him Boss after this arc!"
"Oh really?" Garfield murmured and turned to Subaru
"Oh hello asshole!" Then Garfield raised his fist in the air "i wanna punch you in the face!"
"Wait wait! Don't punch me in the face, i know your sister!"
"Is it love interest?"
"No!"
"Good, were the best of friends now"
Garfield walked next to the carriage and sat down "So, we go to Michael jackson? He's been sitting there for hours waiting for you"
Subaru gaves thumbs up "Alright"
Inside a hut, michael jackson wrapped in bandages said "Hee hee."
Subaru scratched his head "Sooo, how did you end up like that?"
"Hee hee"
Subaru exchanged glances with Garfield, Ram-
"Hey wait! Why the hell are you here Ram? Weren't you at the mansion?" Subaru yelled
Ram nodded "Of course, i teleported from there to here."
Subaru scratched his head "Alright."
He turned to michael jackson again "Soooo, can you tell me something else except-"
"Hee Hee!"
"Except Hee Hee.."
Michael jackson remained quiet "Who will dance on the floor in th-"
"And don't sing me billie jeans please, i want to continue the plot and reach the end so i can have sex with the harem that i 100% deserve and gained"
Michael jackson's smile widen, and he rose from his bed, and a fedora hat appeared in place of his miniscule top hat.
And he started to dance and spin. Meanwhile Ram pulled out a boombox from her inventory and started to play smooth criminal "That's my type." Ram said
"Annie are you crying?" Michael jackson said "Annie are you okay? Annie are you okay?" Michael jackson said
"Hee Hee!"
Subaru pinched the bridge of his nose "Let's leave.."
"You've been struck by, hit by, a Smooth criminal-"
Subaru closed the door behind him.
Subaru went to Emilia, who was resting "oh hi rapey hero," Emilia said "So, are you ready to make me upset?"
"Yes. The trials, they must be done. And since you are useless, ill be doing it myself."
Emilia huffed "Im now angry, and i don't want to be love interest anymore" She crossed her arms and looked away
"but, you are my love interest"
Emilia scowled and looked at Subaru "You got twenty other pussies"
Subaru then said "But i want your pussy"
Emilia then said "Alright, im convinced, i want to be love interest again"
"Deal!"
Subaru entered the trials and met his parents "Eyo eyo, want to play command & conquer?"
"Why the hell you know that game i thought only old-ass men knew that game" Subaru's father asked
"Well, i know it"
Subaru's parents played command & conquer togheter with Subaru and they won but subaru lost
Subaru starts to cry "Im bad son"
"Thats okay son, atleast you got pussy" Subaru's father responded
"damn, your right."
Then echidnut presented herself in school girl attire to subaru "Are you hot yet?" She asked him
"yes, im very hot right now." Subaru responded
"Can we sex"
"Nope, only at the end of the story. For now get blue balled" Echidnut responded
"But now- GET OUT" Echidnut slapped subaru out of the trials
On his way out, which was being catapulted, Crusch catched Subaru mid-air
"hey, you are doing the plot quite well, but tell me, arent you a bit too serious about this?
"What you mean?"
"I mean, your following the plot quite excellently, its almost you forgot why this story exists"
"Elaborate"
"Bitch just say abracadabra like last chapter and resolve any problems"
"... Goddammnit you're right, Abracadabra!"
The trials, barrier, whatever problem was out there was destroyed in million pieces
Crusch smiled and nodded "There we go, our rapey hero."
Then Emilia spawned infront of him, and pulled out a clipboard. Subaru and Crusch leaned in "Tell me subaru, so why did half of the plot dissappeared in an instant? Did you say abracadabra?" She showed the clipboard with half of the plot removed
"yep, i said abracadabra"
"Oh well, that's excellent. Since we have reached the end of the arc, We have skipped lots of important and key information, but who cares"
She threw the clipboard behind her "Kiss me"
Subaru nodded "Alright!"
Subaru head butted Emilia and kissed her
Elsa, Crusch, Felt, Rem, and beatrice spawned beside's them. Elsa said "My turn"
Elsa forcefully kissed Suaru, then rem kissed him, felt, and lastly Beatrice.
Then Beatrice raised her book "Oh, you forgot that im suppose to be best girl in this season."
"Yes yes, you are best girl, always."
At the mansion, Michael jackson celebrated the 100% deserved victory of rapey hero, with him at the center busting a move every two seconds, while screaming "HEE HEE"
With classic music in the background, they were all spinning and drinking whine.
Subaru said "I can't drink whine"
Emilia responded "Who care"
Elsa pointed at Felt who was drinking three bottles of wines at once "Look, felt drinking more than you"
Subaru shrugged
Emilia teleported to the center with a beautiful dress.
She held a sword in the air "Now now, come here my greatest knight"
Julius juukulius spawned "Not you"
Subaru spawned in his place
"Better."
"So, everyone, listen up!" Every dancers and visitor of the village listened, including michael jackson stopped.
"Rapey hero has done nothing for us! But we should congratulate him for the effort of saying abracadabra and resolving every single conflict we have now!"
the crowd cheered and continued to dance and drink as usual.
Subaru smiled "Now this is life."
End of the chapter.