Throughout the past few months we continued our little rendezvous when and wherever we could. The sex was always explosive, leaving me shaking and completely satisfied every time. In other words there was nothing little about the things that we did.
It was like we just couldn't get enough of each other.
I couldn't get enough of him
The thought of me needing him made my heart consume in total fear.
Unfortunately as I laid beside him yesterday, in the townhouse we shared together I realized that I did.
I watched him get dressed for work with his white dress shirt undone and his tie around his neck as he stared down at my bare body. Like I was the most captivating thing alive.
He'd seen me naked many of times by now and knew of places that I hadn't but still his eyes never changed.
He left our balcony door open allowing the breeze to flow in. His hair was undone falling in front of him like a curtain as he reached down to kiss me just how I always preferred it.
It was final, I am a fool in love with a man who was not my boyfriend of three years. I never thought I would ever reach such a conclusion, especially with the likes of him. I use to hate everything about him with a fucking passion. Now I couldn't wait to be in his arms as we created our own.
He had changed or maybe I was blessed to be privied into his life. Gone was the cold business man who appeared arrogant and selfish. Instead there was a man who loved his son dearly and missed his wife everyday.
There was a gentlemen who reminded me about chivalry but lost it entirely in the bedroom. There was someone who had softened when it came to me.
I would be lying if I said that he didn't still scold and conceal his emotions at work. Or by saying that we still didn't have our disagreements.
Our nosy neighbors could attest to the screaming matches that we got into occasionally. The man still knew how to push every last button that I possessed and took pleasure in it to my dismay.
Another moment that I knew in my heart that I loved him was Friday night. When I got home from work I mentioned that Caleb was beginning to grow suspicious.
The lies were catching up to me but I knew eventually that they would. Caleb was a police officer for goodness sakes it was his job to be observant.
When I told Winston his response didn't disappoint.
"Then leave him." He replied unconcerned as if it was the easiest solution. When I didn't respond in a timely manner as he had hoped he lashed out just like he always did when he was hurt.
"Then you leave, no one's stopping you Salem." He sighed out of frustration, uncrossing his legs and removing his reading glasses.
"I didn't say that Win." I said hurriedly throwing that suggestion off the table no matter how much he was pissing me off right now. My heart dropped at how carelessly he said it but I knew better.
It was his defense mechanism, something that I realized from being with him for months.
"Do you ever get tired of hearing your own voice?" I hissed throwing my keys and bag on the table.
As soon as the words escaped my mouth he arched a brow in amusement. Already knowing what his smug ass would say, I spoke again before he could answer.
"All I said is that maybe we should dial it back a bit and that he was becoming suspicious." He scoffed standing up and coming over to take off my coat.
He turned me around pulling me to him.
He must've gotten off work much earlier than me because of the way he was dressed. He wore dark pajama pants tied around his waist and a long sleeve buttoned shirt that was opened showing his chest.
It always surprised me how a man at his age managed to stay so fit.
"I told you when we first started this that I don't share my dear but you insist on trying my patience." He said but I didn't pay much attention to it because I was too busy taking in his bare skin in front of me.
"As much as I love when you check me out, we're in the middle of a serious discussion." He teased.
I giggled bitting my lips wrapping my arms around his neck. My hands eagerly moving to tangle my fingers in his soft hair.
I leaned up giving him a kiss but before I could deepen it I froze hearing something. To my surprise there was a song playing in the background that I hadn't notice until now.
He knew how much I loved this artist and it made me smile in delight at the fact that he actually listened and remembered. My eyes traveled over to the record player in the corner.
As he stepped away following my glaze, he smirked instantly holding out his hand for mine.
"Care to dance?" He asked not needing to since my hand was already in his before he could finish.
I kicked off my heels leaving them at front door.
Letting him lead me to our living room like it was a dance floor from the many charity events that he hosted.
That night we swayed to the song together with his arms around my waist and my head on his chest. He was warm and inviting as he always was to me and I basked in all of his glory.
Cause I wanna, wanna, wanna want you
I need to, need to, need to need you
I closed my eyes listening to song and the rhythm of his beating heart and I thought to myself how this was home. It was not the typical four painted walls and it did not have furniture or came at a price.
No, it was Winston Levingston.
"Okay." I whispered against him.
Sealing my fate once and for all.