Once In A Lifetime
by Castlefan6
Author's Note: This is totally AU. This is the continuation of Secrets Revealed, which should be read first. THIS IS BY REQUEST AND IS DEDICATED TO MY FRIEND SWORDWRITER. IT WILL NOT BE A CASKETT ENDING, BUT JORICK, Jordan, and Rick.
NOTE: The Dates have been adjusted to make this story possible.
Taking a Literary License to fill in the blanks.
I don't own Castle; I only use the characters for amusement, except the ones I create.
THIS WILL NOT BE A CASKETT ENDING
Also, we take liberties with Canon's timeline and use events to make this more believable fiction. Thanks.
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READ MY PROFILE BEFORE SENDING A PRIVATE MESSAGE
Chapter 1
The Loft
Two Hours After Initial Debriefing of Bracken Take Down
Jordan looked over at Rick sitting on the couch; he looked more exhausted than she felt, then she saw the slight flare of his nostrils. He had fallen asleep even over the noise of the TV News Announcer, who was droning on about the events of Senator William H. Bracken's arrest, most of it conjecture and the network's speculation on how things had occurred.
Jordan knew that he had met with the entire team and that Kate was trying her darndest to get back in good graces with him, but she hadn't heard how their conversation went, nor would she ask. She had laid her cards on the table with Kate, and if she couldn't convince Rick that she loved him more than she did, he was welcome in her home anytime, any day.
Rick made it a point to make sure she was invited back to the Loft once some of the confusion died down. She saw him and Kate talking, so she figured the invitation to the Loft was all case-related; they had one more meeting once Jackson Hunt reached his final destination. Rick's office had been swept for listening devices just before they arrived home.
Home? What she wouldn't give to be able to travel back to those days in college, where she was his Jordy, his everything, and he made sure she knew it every single day. A promise ring was given to her, and after Kyra had torn his heart out, she cherished it as if it were the HOPE diamond.
She had confided in Beckett that yes, there had been a relationship, and yes, she was still in love with him. She was serious when she told her that Rick was welcome in her home, her life, and her bed anytime he wanted her, a statement that shocked Beckett. She didn't have to add that if Rick chose Beckett, she would adjust, walk away, and be happy for them someday. She had no idea HOW, but she would be happy in time if he were happy.
She made the mistake of not sharing all the information about herself with Rick during the first case, when they worked together with the NYPD to apprehend Scott Dunn. She should have told him then that she was mere days away from being a single woman and a divorcee and wasn't the least bit sad. Tom was a good man and had been a good father to Danielle, but the romance, what little had existed past the honeymoon, between them had died around the time Danielle got involved in sports, around seventh grade.
She was just like every woman. She had needs, needs that went unfulfilled until she was reintroduced to Rick for this case, and its connection to a mass shooting case the NYPD was about to BOTCH. She could certainly relate to Meg Ryan's character, Sally, in the movie Harry Met Sally where Sally faked an orgasm in the restaurant. Being honest, most of the time, Tom thought he had hit the mark; she had pulled a Sally on him. She didn't remember the last time she had a real orgasm; that was a lie. She knew exactly when it was.
It was the last time she and Rick had been intimate before he shipped out for his deployment in the Middle East. No man had ever loved her that way before or after Rick, and if it weren't for her damn hormones and it being so easy to blame Rick for everything back then, perhaps they would have formed a life together.
She had received a letter from Rick, news she feared had come true when she read that his tour had been extended for an additional eleven months. Typical Rick tried to make even bad news bearable: "Jordy, I know this is not the news you wanted to get, BUT the good news is that this is the last extension they could force upon me. So, some good news, Sweetheart." Leave it to him to find a positive spin on just about anything.
That night, she was angry, angry at the U.S. Marine Corp, angry at Rick for joining, furious that she was so damn horny, and now would have to wait almost another year to feel him inside of her. She went to a party with a girlfriend that night with the honest intention of having one drink to blow off some steam and wound up drinking spiked punch, then a lot more of the spirits that spiked it.
Tom Shaw was a good-looking man, a Pre-Med student with wealthy parents, a catch for most girls, but she wasn't interested until she returned his kiss, allowed her hormones to take over, and lost control. He was nowhere as good as Rick was in bed, but a far cry better than Betha with Batteries in her nightstand. She kicked herself when she was sober, but the damage had been done; she was pregnant.
She wrote Rick a Dear John letter after convincing Tom that the soon-to-be baby was his, even allowing a prenatal DNA test to be done at her expense. In the letter, she included the Promise Ring that they both were supposed to wear, pledging to be faithful to each other.
She lied in the letter, not giving him the actual reason or the chain of events that caused her to wind up in such a predicament. She knew that returning the promise ring would be extremely hurtful to Rick; they had spent almost an entire weekend selecting one for her and one for him. Then they had crowned the relationship goal with what else? A weekend in bed at a friend's guest home, just the two of them.
She could almost recite the letter word for word today, nearly two decades after she had written it. She kicked herself again, wondering why this man would even consider a relationship with her; hell, Beckett would be his best choice. Her mind drifted back,
FLASHBACK TO LAST WEEK OF COLLEGE.
"Jordan, please be sure." He pleaded after asking her if she would accept the friendship ring. "I don't know if my heart can take another break like Kyra caused. I know that I was awful to you at first, but you kept coming, kept being nice, WHY Jordy?" he asked.
"I swore I wasn't going to be the first to say it, but you're right. You did treat me like crap the first few months after Kyra broke your heart. Rick, I understood, it wasn't me, it was the hurt you lashed out at. I don't know if I could have tolerated a pest like me if our situations were reversed, but you want to know WHY I did it? Don't you know WHY, or are you making me say those words first?"
"OK, I'll say it, Rick. I'm in love with you. I loved you even when you were with the other one, but I know you would always be faithful to her. My friends told me I was nuts, always getting the cold shoulder, until we finally started going to small events. Miniature golfing was our thing. You told me once she hated it and would never go. Do you remember my reply?" She asked, not expecting him to remember much about their first days together.
"You wouldn't care if we went to count bees in a bee hive making honey, as long as you could be near me, hold my hand, and then you kissed me for a long time." He replied,
"Yeah, I did, I wanted to rip your clothes off and make love to you at that very moment, but I thought we needed to graduate in a few weeks, and the Dean would frown on that sort of activity." She laughed as he kissed her sweetly,
"You loved me, even when the other one was the only thing I ever talked about, Jordy? How, I mean, didn't that break your heart?" Rick asked
"Yeah, it did, but that's why I knew how much you were hurting, and that if I stayed patient, you would see that you were worthy of being loved, and someone already did, AND that someone was standing in front of you, ME." She said. Their kissing delayed the trip to the jewelry store for over three hours, but neither one complained.
They were growing closer with each new day. He even relocated to Virginia with her when she entered Quantico for training. Then something happened. He would never tell her what, only that this was something he had to do, and he wouldn't blame her if she wanted to pursue other guys. He wouldn't hold her to her promise since he didn't know when he was coming back. The unsaid words of even IF he would make it back home, in one piece or severely wounded, were never mentioned.
"Jordy, I know you're wearing a promise ring, it's as deep into a relationship as I can go right now, but with me shipping out, well, I'm releasing you from that, I mean."
She grabbed his face, kissed him, and pledged with her words and body that she would be faithful and true to him. At that time, she meant every word spoken and action that occurred. Then loneliness and boredom, and the party, the fucking party.
If she had only stayed home, she thought, "No, if you had only kept the promise. Rick just asked you to tell him if you met someone before he got home, and he would set you free. It was no wonder that he wouldn't talk to you when you met his ship when he got home almost a year later. It took nearly three years, and his love for her daughter, Danielle, to even get him at least friendly with her.
Her mind went to the letter. She cried with almost every word she wrote,
"Dear Rick,
"I know you never expected to receive this type of letter, not from your Jordy, but I've enclosed your friendship ring. I hope it makes it to where you are, undamaged, and finds you well. I thought I was strong enough to do this, but I'm not. I'm not saying I don't love you; I couldn't say that lie, not now, not ever. I do love you, and I will forever.
"I'm not strong enough to take the loneliness that comes with each new day and every weekend, to see almost everyone else having fun with someone they care about. All I have are your letters, when they finally arrive. I know you said you had to do this, and I respect you for following your heart. Please respect me as I follow mine now, Rick. It's over, I met someone new, and I won't cheat on you. Please stay safe, I do love you, but this has to be Goodbye Love.
Jordy."
PRESENT TIME
She didn't realize it, but she was crying just thinking about the hurt she had caused. She never heard Rick slip behind her, and gently turn her around, cup her face, and kiss her more intimately than he had since they had reunited.
"I know what you're thinking about. It was a long time ago, and you were different. I was different. Jordy, I forgave you; you have to forgive yourself." He said softly, as he gently wiped her tears away with his hankie, then kissed each eye.
"Rick, this is probably terrible timing, but I saw you and Kate talking for quite a while after the security forces cleared the exits for us. Did you resolve anything, Luv?" She asked, not wanting to hear what she expected to hear, but knowing that the longer she put it off, the more it would hurt.
"Yeah, we did talk, well, I did a lot of talking, she didn't have very many answers, so the letter of apology that she worked so hard on was just to keep Boyle from firing her for disobeying a direct order. I asked her one question, "WHY?" Why was Tom Demming the super cop who knew everything when Javi and Kevin had worked side by side with her for over four years?
"What did she say, Rick?" Jordan asked, genuinely concerned
"I got a lot of double talk, or Beckett speech, talking in subtexts, she was infatuated with him because I had paid attention to you, and other females," Rick said,
"ME? Hell, she even told me she had intel on me that I was married to a doctor husband and lived in Chicago? What the hell would she be concerned about you working with me?" Jordan asked, getting angry.
"I know you went out of your way to be gracious to me and Avery, but that was it. I know no one in the NYPD had a hint of our earlier relationship. Hell, that was close to twenty years ago." She huffed,
"Why would she bring that up? I even told her that if she wasn't ready to commit to you, don't start, I was here and you were welcome into my home, my heart, and my bed any day of the week you wanted." Jordan said, blushing now that she had told it to the man she had meant it for.
"Rick, I'm sorry, I thought you were in love with her, and I offered her all the ways to mend your relationship. I see she pulled her normal Beckett move, she knew better than anyone else, as usual." Jordan pouted, she was pissed.
"I know that Jordan, I overheard you talking to her, and that's when I knew." He said,
"Don't leave me out here on this limb to say something stupid, what did you know, Rick?" Jordan asked, still holding him tight,
"I knew that I never stopped loving you, even when you were married to Tom, and that conversation with Kate told me that you felt the same way. I thought that even back then, if you had told me about Danielle being on the way, it wouldn't have mattered to me; I would love her as I would my own." He said as he dried the tears that poured from Jordan's eyes.
"Rick, I never meant a word in that letter. I cried for a month when I felt for my ring and remembered the hurtful thing I did. When I rushed down to the ship to meet you when I found out you were coming home, you were polite, too polite, but something about you made Dani fall in love with you. I guess I have my daughter to thank for working on your soft side for three years, I mean,"
"Jordy, shhhh, we both did stupid things. You're right about Dani, I love my little princess, and I know she loves me. I'm just glad that she and Alexis get along so well." Rick said,
"You asked if Beckett and I resolved anything, and the answer is yes. She will work cases out of the 12th under the new Captain, when Bob forces Boyle to promote from within, and I will handle the cold cases out of the 117th and act as the Coordinator between the NY FBI Field Office and the NYPD." He smiled,
"Then you two aren't getting together? I mean, I" She stammered,
"Jordy, I think Taylor Swift wrote a song about something Beckett once said, We are never, ever getting together, ' or close to it, as she rushed him and the necking session was in full swing until the FaceTime call rang, Damn it to hell, doesn't anyone believe in romance she thought.
It was Jackson with the final debrief call they had been expecting. Jordan hurriedly buttoned her blouse and tried to adjust her hair as Rick stalled for as long as he could before answering the call and placing it on the big screen.
"Hello, Rick and Jordan. I'm sorry to interrupt whatever was going on over there," Jackson started the call.
"Oh, you're not interrupting anything, Jackson," Jordan said, which earned her a What the Hell Look, I was born at night, but not last night. Well, if that's true, you may want to excuse yourself and button your blouse once it's on the right side; it's inside out. He laughed.
Jordan bolted from the room and was back in just a few minutes; she had also taken a hairbrush to her hair and looked more like the typical Jordan.
"Good, are we all ready now?" Jackson asked with a smile,
"Ready," They both replied in unison,
"OK, it was a great mission, Jordan. Kudos for an excellent plan, including the contingency planning. We really hit pay dirt. The total tally of incarcerated individuals is as follows: US Senators, Two—Bracken and his Junior Senator Menendez, who was beginning to learn the art of stealing.
"From the House of Representatives, twelve, including three aides, from the NYPD, nineteen, including three from Internal Affairs, four from each of the following precincts, 12th, 17th, 54th, and 117th. These are the preliminary numbers. We expect the number to go higher once the deal-making starts between the lawyers and crooks.
"For casualties, Simmons' group was the only one stupid enough to try to shoot their way out, a total of twenty-five dead. One wounded from LE, from a bullet that ricocheted and hit a corporal in the arm, he was treated and released in about one hour after arriving at the hospital.
"Great plan and great execution, so you two are on vacation for the next ten days. See you when you get back for our next combined case. Thanks again, Superb job," he said, and the screen faded to black.
"Rick, I would like to hear about your conversation with Kate, but not right now, I have other plans for you. All I need to know is that I'm the one you want, nothing else for now. I promise I won't be that clingy vine that I was in college, or drive you crazy. Please promise you'll tell me if I go a little nuts sometimes. I still can't believe you loved me all the time I loved you, I'm in heaven." She said, tears coming to her eyes,
"Let me prove it to you, Jordy. He took her by the hand and sat her in his lap in one swift move." He smiled as he kissed her. For the first time in decades, she knew she was kissing her man as both got lost in the other's eyes.
It only took a few seconds for the blouse to find its home on the love seat, as they celebrated a few things, one, the case, two, just how badly she had missed the man whom she was going to show just how much and for so long, as many times as she had strength for.
TBC
A/N: Dedicating this one to my Friend and fellow fic writer Swordwriter, I hope I do it justice for you, buddy. You'll notice slight changes from Secrets Revealed, to keep the story fresh and the characters moving ahead in their lives. Kate Beckett will make an appearance from time to time; Rick is still Czar of the Cold Case Squad, but the big mystery is who is going to replace Roy, who is now safely tucked away in one of the many WITSEC sanctuaries. For Caskett Shippers, we'll have one that ends with them soon. I don't know of a bigger Shipper than Swordwriter, but he wants to see a different angle on how the story or series could have gone. Thx