Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

~Lily~ Secrets are No Fun

If there was one thing that Lily had learned about relationships it was that secrets have no place in them. It seems obvious enough. Common sense. It might even seem easy. But it's not. And if you think it is, then you've never been in a position like Lily was. And she was so guilty, yes, but she didn't have a choice. Not when he was so... him. He'd try and save her. He'd try and fix things, but she couldn't let him. This was the lesser of two evils, she convinced herself.

It started when she woke up. Not exactly newsworthy, but that morning was different. She knew it, because she had closed her window last night. It had been quite chilly and she remembered it vividly. Yet she woke early in the morning because of the draft in her room. Groggily, she slammed her window shut again and it didn't occur to her until later that she hadn't opened it last night. And upon waking up for good that day, she found the more peculiar of the two things. A note. A note that wasn't signed. A note that was ever so vague. A note that laid on the pillow she never used. A note, more importantly, in her room that no one but James had access to. But James didn't write the note. She knew that much. There was very little else she was so sure of.

"Oh Lily~" James shouted sing-songily as a wake up call. She shoved the scrap of paper beneath her pillow as James came running. He had gotten in the habit of waking up as early as Lily did so they could spend more time together. He was sweet like that, although he did have a tendency to barge into her room without notice.

"Good morning dear," he said cheerfully.

"Good morning," Lily replied. "What's got you in such a good mood?"

"Nothing really. Or maybe a lot of things. I don't know," James admitted. His eyes were twinkling.

"Well I'm glad, but I've got to get changed and I'd like to do that without you in here..."

"Only if you're sure. I'm quite good at keeping company, you know," James winked. Lily shook her head at him and pointed to the door. "Alright, alright. Just trying to offer my services."

"Don't put it like that!" Lily said laughing. Even now, hiding a secret she didn't fully understand, he was able to make her laugh. And that made her all the guiltier, because she had no intention of telling him.

"If you insist, my mistress," James grinned as he bowed. Lily smacked him with her pillow, the other pillow.

"Get out," she said. She could still hear his laughs as he returned to his room, but her own smile quickly fell. She snatched her wand from her bedside and the note from beneath her pillow. And with a quick spell, the note was gone with a puff of smoke. No one had to know now.

"Hey Lily?" he said. She turned to face him. Sirius Black. The elusive Marauder. Damaged and flawed, but perfect at the same time. He was a contradiction. Born from the dark yet he basked in the light. He was broken, sure, but he wore a mask in front of everyone else so no one had to know.

"Yeah?"

"Can I speak with you?"

"'Course," Lily said. She smiled at him, but she wasn't really into it. Neither was he. He had fear written over his features and that scared Lily. She didn't think much could scare Sirius, or maybe everything did and he was simply hiding it.

"Meet me on the path to Hagrid's after Defense," he said quietly. His eyes distracted and hers narrowed.

"Okay- Sirius wait!" she said, but he had already pushed ahead. James glanced back at her with a questioning glance, but Lily dismissed it with a smile. She knew things weren't perfect between James and Sirius yet, but Lily wasn't going to make James worry over something he didn't need to be involved in. And her boyfriend seemed satisfied with that and continued chatting away with Remus.

Classes had never gone so slow. She watched the clock that mocked her from the wall. The hands moving painstakingly slow. She watched and she counted and she only stopped to glance at Sirius. Her gaze met with the back of his silky black hair. His eyes fixed on the floor or the teacher or the ceiling. Anywhere where Lily wasn't. James would reach over and squeeze her hand. Marlene would pass notes behind the professor's back. Peter would make silly comments under his breath. Mary would giggle as Remus scolded James for magically tying Peter's laces together. Yet Lily and Sirius sat there in solemn silence. He felt so far from her and the clock so slow, but the minutes ticked down.

"Professor?" Sirius asked. He stood up in the middle of class. Mr Fawley was in the middle of a lesson neither of them were paying attention to. "May I run to the loo?"

"Sure," Maverick said, quickly returning to teaching. She watched Sirius leave in a hurry, throwing his bag over his shoulder. Once out of view, her eyes returned to the clock. The monotonous tick-tocking would be her undoing. The blunt instrument of tedium.

"Class dismissed," her teacher said, earlier than he had to. He winked at Lily and she gave him an apologetic smile. She slung her own bag over her shoulder and disappeared out the door. The halls were nearly empty and she walked as briskly as possible. She jogged across the Pitch and slowed to a walk on the winding path to Hagrid's. She had time to spare, but Sirius was equally early.

"Lily," he said softly. She spun around and watched him exit from his disguise of the trees. His eyes were more sunken than usual. "Do you have your note?" She shook her head carefully. It didn't surprise Lily that Sirius had gotten one too. They were similar in this way.

"Burned it. Couldn't let James see it accidentally."

"Good. James- he can't know," Sirius said. His voice shook as he spoke.

"I know," Lily agreed. "So what do we do about it?"

"Everything we can. I don't care what it takes." They stood in silence for a moment longer.

"Who do you think sent it?" Lily asked.

"Not Him directly," Sirius said, shuddering. "but under his orders, so it doesn't matter. This is real. We don't have a choice. But remember Rule 15 and if I tell you to run, then you have to run."

"But that doesn't mean endangering yourself. We will do what we must, but no self-sacrificing. Not for some stupid rulebook," Lily told him. Lily wasn't going to let Sirius get that into his head.

"You may think it's stupid, but it isn't. You read the same note as I did. Voldemort is after me and he's after you. And you know better than anyone that Hogwarts isn't as safe as it seems."

"Of course I know that, but we are going to be a team. I don't want you playing hero for me. Not for my sake and not for James'."

"This is bigger than you. Than James," Sirius said, his voice raising. "Lily, you have no idea the asset you are going to be to the Order. You think of yourself like you're just some girl. You aren't! You're going to be the one who tips the scales in this war. Not me, not James, not even Dumbledore. You heard him, this isn't his fight."

"How does that equate to it being mine?" Lily demanded. Sirius was scaring her. His eyes wild and voice oozing with passion and sacrifice. Scary thoughts. Reckless thoughts.

"I've never met anyone like you. You're bold and a fighter and you have this stubborn righteous that never fails you. You're intelligent and you're just better. Better than the rest of us."

"I am not bett-"

"No." His voice was so firm it scared her. "You are, Lily Evans. Maybe people are stronger than you, smarter than you. Doesn't matter. You're better. You're mind, you're heart..." His voice trailed off then. Her heart was picking up. He wasn't making sense. This wasn't the normal him. Yet, she thought, the normal him was just a shell. Something to protect everyone else from seeing his brokenness. Maybe she didn't know him the way she thought she did.

"I-"

"Promise me you'll run. You'll run like hell if I say. You'll follow me blindly when I call, because you'll have to be ready. You'll have to trust me on this one, Tigerlily, I know them too well," Sirius said. The intensity in his eyes compelled her.

"I will," she promised. But I'll be damned if I don't make sure you're running with me, she added in her head.

"Good. Now we should head back inside." He looked relieved, but Lily was anything but.

"When did it all start? The war, I mean," Lily asked as they retraced their steps up to the castle.

"What do you mean? Voldemort started the war."

"No," she began. "He didn't. He didn't stand up and declare a war. There are no armies. No definitive sides. No battlefields. Just death and hatred in the shadows. So when did this all start? Why is it picking up traction now?"

"Because the other side started killing more people. Everyone else, who isn't sick in the head, knew that they had to put a stop to it," Sirius answered. He seemed confused as to what she was asking him.

"But who, Sirius? The Order is only a small group of ragtag wizards and witches. The Aurors are under Ministry control and to be frank, the Ministry isn't doing much at all. Everyone is scared. If I'm being honest, the only people who aren't sick in the head are the ones who went into hiding straight away. The rest of us are in for a whole lot of I don't even know, but it won't be good."

"Well I can't really answer that. Maybe war is the wrong term for this. Maybe it's simply terrorism. And the rest of us are just people who are fed up with being collateral damage," he said. Lily nodded.

"I hope so, because if this is anything like a Muggle war... too many people will die. Millions, Sirius, millions."

~James~ Red White and Blue

"James!" a voice whispered in the night. A knock pounded on his window frame. He turned to the voice, but saw a blurry version of the inky black night sky. Shoving his glasses onto his face, he saw a silhouette outside. Unlatching the window, he called back out into the night.

"It's Jonathan," the voice said out of breath. Jonathan Blake. The American. He had been sorted Ravenclaw, so he no longer ate meals with the Gryffindor's, but James was always sure to say hi to the bloke in the halls. But it was merely friendliness. James had no true desire to become this guy's friend. Jonathan was Lily's friend and James didn't really want to be anything more than courteous. Somehow, that didn't explain why he was hovering at his windowsill past midnight.

"What are you doing out there?" James said in hushed tones. He flung the window all the way open and ushered Jonathan inside. It was difficult to maneuver with Jonathan dismounting his broom while entering a window, but they managed.

"Needed... to... talk," Jonathan said. James waited for him to catch his breath, but Jonathan hurried with his words. "There's no time. Lily... Sirius-"

"What about them?" James demanded. "Are they alright!?" Jonathan only shook his head.

"They're in trouble. They didn't want you to know."

"What do you mean? Where are they?" Jonathan wasn't making any sense and this wasn't something James was going to take lightly. His friends were in trouble.

"I don't know! But they're flying into trouble, James."

"Do they know that?" he asked.

"Yes, I mean I think. We need to go after them!" Jonathan said. James grabbed his own broom from the corner and was out the window in a flash. Dying from a fall that high wasn't exactly his highest concern at the moment.

"And it was just Sirius and Lily? No one else?"

"No one else," Jonathan affirmed. Why didn't they tell me, he thought, what don't they want me to know?

"Which way?

"Just follow me."

"Are we lost?" James asked. The darkness seemed to suffocate him. Trees. Skies. The moon. A random house here and there. Nothing that stuck out and no one else in the sky.

"I don't know," Jonathan gritted between his teeth. "Just be quiet. They should've been here."

"How do you know? How did you know any of this?" James demanded. He stopped his broom to face Jonathan. Something didn't feel right. Jonathan left something out of his story. Jonathan circled back to the clearing James hovered over. James removed his wand from his cloak.

"There's no time, James! Dammit we need to keep going!"

"I want answers, Blake, and I want them now," James said. Was it a trap? Was Lily and Sirius both sound asleep back at the castle? Was he being lured out into a trap? Possibilities flew through James' head and the more he thought the less he trusted him. Was he a Death Eater planted in Hogwarts? Was he even from America? Was his name even Jonathan Blake?

"Put your wand away. You've got this all wrong."

"Do I? Why don't you tell me exactly what's going on then?" James said.

"If you're just going to stand there and let your girlfriend and best friend die then that's on you! I'm leaving. I'm not playing your stupid games," Jonathan said, speeding away on his broom. James was only more confused, but followed the American anyways. It was a trap, a trick. It had to be. Yet against his better judgement we flew on, because he simply couldn't take the risk that Lily and Sirius were actually in trouble even if that meant his own demise.

"Blake," his voice low. "Where are we going?"

"I am going to find them," Jonathan said, "I'll tell you what I know later." James had to bite his lip in order to feign silence. He wanted to blast Jonathan with some curse or force Veritaserum down his throat or- or something. But he couldn't so he had to keep flying in that suffocating darkness.

"There!" Jonathan whispered. A clearing was below them. A break from the trees. And a cabin was in the center of the woods, illuminated by the moonlight.

"What's the plan?"

"We wait," he said. "And then we save their asses."