Notes:
From the 'Rhyme that fanfic' game on AHA, contains 14 more or less rhyming sentences
Everybody in the greater Hunsford area, near Westerham, Kent, knew that Lady Catherine de Bourgh had but two frames of mind: 'displeased' and 'most seriously displeased'.
When her daughter eloped with a penniless colonel - her own nephew, the temerity! - her temper exploded violently.
With all the vaunted frankness of her character, she vented her spleen far and wide and incessantly.
So badly behaved she, that none of her friends would receive her and even her brother turned on her at last.
Finally, she travelled to Derbyshire, to berate the one who was most to blame, in her view. Once arrived, she was confronted with the ultimate betrayal. That was the last straw for her sanity. The sheer effrontery! The unmitigated gall! Not only had her dependable and staid nephew allowed his cousins to elope, he himself had gone and married that Lizzy!
She, Lady Catherine de Bourgh, would have never allowed such a shameless hussy to take her sister's place. And now that cheap harlot had stolen Pemberley away from her influence, had stolen all that was due her, Lady Catherine! How dare she!?
So worked up was she, that she fainted, foam at her mouth, and died of apoplexy.
She was laid to rest at Pemberley and lamented by nobody.