It had become a routine by this point. Wake up, have breakfast with Mom, go exploring the new layers of the Ruins, meet up with Martlet for a puzzle or two, come home and eat dinner, have a restless night of sleep, and then end up cuddling up under a blanket by the fire with Toriel by the fireplace. And, in this constant, you had been hounded, pursued by the spiteful weed.
Flowey had continued to hound you for what was likely a week; you couldn't tell time that well anymore down here. He whispered things in your ear at night, stalked you when you were awake. At what point would the little cretin get it? This was where you were staying. You weren't continuing forward. You were DETERMINED to see that through.
Yet every annoyance, every terrible, haunting whisper, every near–tripping vine that dared to hurt you… it only made you more Apprehensive in your approach. You found, on the 6th day, you couldn't even SAVE anymore. Whatever this feeling of Apprehension did, it messed with your ability to SAVE and LOAD.
That only made the feeling worse; how long would it be until Flowey found out? How long would it take him to realize that his Determination exceeded yours now? The thought made your skin crawl. The last time that he'd had that kind of power, he used it to torment you, make you dance and jump through hoops, each and every breaking of your SOUL forming a scar that would never go away.
Now it was the dawn of a new day in the Underground. A whole week, and yet it only felt like the first day after you decided to stay. Something had to be done about the weed… before you could be truly satisfied. You needed to find HIM…
"Good morning, my child. It seems that the last night was not particularly restful, was it?" You raised a brow in confusion at Toriel's comment. You thought that you'd actually slept fine. "I mean the bags under your eyes, heeheehee." You instinctively reached for them, rubbing at your peepers in an attempt to knock the sand out of them. The lack of sleep was getting to you, clearly.
"Frisk, I believe that today is the day we determine how far along in your education you are, so that I may best prepare a curriculum."
"Okay?"
"To be perfectly honest, I have no doubt that you are a very intelligent child, are you not?"
"Sometimes," you joked. "But I am just a child after all."
"Frisk, I know for certain that you are no mere child. You have a wisdom that tells… of a long struggle. I do not know why, but I feel as though you have learned more than most children your age should have."
"You could say that again."
"Pardon?"
"It's… it's nothing," you sighed. Your mom needn't know the full extent of your wisdom. It's not like it was practical wisdom anyways… more just an agedness that had dragged you deeper into the Underground than you should've ever gone. But that didn't sit well with the goat–like monster.
"Frisk. Would you like to meet someone today? I know you do not like to go to the basement, but I have a friend who lives on the other side of the door; he is quite smart, and has a way with words that would tickle your funnybone." Your blood ran cold at the thought. No… you did not want to meet with this friend.
"I'm good, Mom… I was just going to go and explore some more of the Ruins today, maybe find some more of those older puzzles down below.
"Oh… I see. Well, Frisk, if you change your mind, I will be here." The disappointment in her voice told you that she had been hoping to spend some time with you, getting to properly nurture you. It was a reminder that, at the end of the day, you were, indeed, still a child.
"Mom… would you want to come exploring with me? I know you said you had some butterfly catching spots that you wanted to show me."
"Oh, my child… I am afraid that you may have already found them. They're all up here. I had told you before, the Ruins becomes quite small when you get to know them."
"Do you know anything about the Dark Ruins?" At that, Toriel guffawed, almost taken aback by the question.
"Of course I know things about the Dark Ruins. After all, my child, they are as much a part of my history as any other monster's."
"Why do monsters come to live here?" Toriel's expression seemed to drop. You had a feeling you knew it had to do with Asgore. The Dreemurr patriarch was always a sore subject, even in passing with regard to his rule.
"Oh… oh, Frisk… do you care for the state of the Ruins?"
"It's collapsing around them. There has to be a good reason, yeah?"
"Well… for some, it is nostalgic. They prefer these decrepit ruins over those of other parts of the Underground… others think it is too crowded over there…"
"But… don't other monsters miss them?"
"Of course, little one. Martlet is a good example. Surely she has told you of what lies beyond the doorway, has she not?" You lied with a nod. Toriel didn't need to know how you knew of Snowdin. Only that it existed.
"Well… she came here after… after the last child fell down here, many, many nights ago. She has not been open about him, but she was fond enough of him that she chose exiling herself here. Grief can… take many forms, Frisk. I do not envy how scattered her mind has been." That clicked with something that had bugged you, many times before.
It was always staring you in the face. Flowey wasn't some heartless thing that existed to spite Asriel's memory… Flowey was Asriel grieving. All his talk of kill or be killed, all his anger, his nonchalance in being so callous and cruel… it was all a mask. A mask for a grieving child who lacked a SOUL, and lacked the only person that could understand him.
His ranting at the end of existence about how he was doing it all for Chara made even more sense now. He knew that you weren't Chara. But he didn't want to truly acknowledge it… even when he did.
"Young one? Are you alright?" You startled out of your stupor. The realization of Flowey's dilemma had hit you like a truck, and it'd made your eyes widen to the size of dinner plates. It had been something you'd forgotten. In your attempted mass murder, you'd found that the weed was little more than a vindictive, sadistic, laughing, sociopathic creature, fit for little other than to entertain your boredom by the end.
"Mom… I… I really messed up," you finally responded.
"What?"
"Mom… if you could go back, change the past, everyone forgets about you, but you remember… what would you use it for?" Toriel seemed taken aback by the question.
"My child… that is… a very specific question, with a very loaded outcome. I cannot answer you in good faith."
"Please?"
"I do not think that this is —"
"Toriel!" Her expression turned to shock as you hastily corrected your outburst. "M–Mom… please. I just need some answers… please… answer my question." The boss monster sighed, closing her eyes before she looked back to you, but with an interrogating gaze rather than an understanding one.
"I will… but only if I may be able to ask you something in return, Frisk." You had a sinking feeling you knew what she would ask… but you needed a confirmation to what you were thinking.
"Alright Mom… just be honest with me, and I'll be honest with you," That seemed to soften the caprine–like face above you before she sighed.
"If I had the power to go back, I would take it… I would take it to a time before you fell. Back to before the other children had fallen. I would have done things differently, to be sure… but I am certain I would have still ended on this path." You tilted your head in curiosity, and she kept going, elaborating further. "I would have stopped ASGORE from demanding the death of any humans that had come down here." You nodded.
"How would you have done it?"
"I… do not think I understand."
"You can go back, erase consequences, do things over again… how would you do it?" Toriel initially looked ready to respond, to give you some assurance… but then her expression darkened as she realized the gravity of what you were asking.
"I… I… I do not know, my child." That only told you one thing… morals were only as strong as your will, your Determination. "I am sorry if that is not satisfying enough."
"No… it's perfect, Mom…" It was. But it also had terrifying potential. You couldn't help but think that, if an adult wouldn't know how to fix consequences of their past, how was a child supposed to? How was Asriel supposed to? How were you supposed to? The thought gave you a deep pit in your stomach, a feeling of Apprehension. A new star formed next to the table, one you couldn't interact with.
"Now, I have my own questions, my child. I will not pressure you, but I do want an honest answer." You gave a slow nod in understanding before she moved on, looking toward the fireplace now with you.
"I know you did something that you regret. Something terrible. What was it?" Your heart stopped, a lump in your throat now as your SOUL threatened to break under the stress of the question. You didn't answer immediately, and instead stayed silent as you tried your best to answer her question. Toriel didn't push, but her gaze told you that you should answer soon.
"M–Mom," you shakily sighed. "I… I don't know if I can tell you that."
"When we met, when you came back from the door, you said that you had hurt people before; monsters that I know the names of. That, and your question today, makes me think that you have done more than simple 'terrible things'. I wish to know what, so that I may help you move on." The thought of Toriel helping you to move on made you laugh bitterly.
"That's IDIOTIC…" Your tone was bitter and resentful now, but surprisingly calm.
"Frisk, do not deny me an answer," she calmly warned.
"If I tell you… it will change how you see me."
"If it is that serious, then you MUST tell me!" Your jaw clenched at the harshness in her statement, the way that Toriel looked at you. It wasn't the mother you'd enjoyed the company of many times before. It was the Queen of the monsters, Asgore's equal. You looked away briefly, shame and Apprehension building up within you.
"Mom… please don't make me… I'm… I'm not ready." It was that simple phrase that broke Toriel's harsh and terrifying glare, and she sighed in exasperation while she squinted her eyes shut. "I'll tell you… but right now isn't a good time. I need… I need to think about how best to tell you." Toriel gave a "tch" in response, clearly not satisfied… but she didn't belittle or berate you for your decision. She instead remained monotone in her response.
"I understand. When will you tell me?" Your jaw clenched again. There wouldn't be any escape from this. But you had an idea of how to do it.
"Tonight… before dinner. There's just… I just have to think."
"And what if you decide not to again?" she asked. The question was legitimate, and only made that welling feeling of Apprehension stick again.
"I… I don't know." Toriel sighed again, this time placing a paw upon your shoulder as she tried to explain the gravity of what you were saying to her.
"Frisk. You are a good child, even if you have done bad. I see it in you every day when I meet you in the Dark Ruins, every night when you come to me to sleep. And yet… for the terrible things that you have done, you do not wish to tell me, your mother. Strange, is it not, that a child feels that they cannot tell their family what ails them?" She then looked away, her ears hiding the entirety of her expression as she looked toward the window.
"Go, my child. Think about how you shall tell me. I will not judge you for your terrible deeds… merely help you in moving past them." Her tone had remained consistent, unwavering, but you could tell that such a statement of fact broke her heart. You moved to hug her, and the monster pushed you away. "I will be waiting to embrace you as your mother again when you may embrace me to tell what troubles your every moment."
You looked at the skylight above the doorway to the Ruins. Pieces of sunlight cut into it, creating jagged shards of color that illuminated the floor below. The square of dead leaves that encased you felt like a cage. But you still endured. Determination flowed through you, and you weren't going to stop.
At least… that's what you told yourself. In reality, you felt choked, burdened by chains of karma that now scraped your neck. Your sins weren't crawling down your back. They were shredding it. There was only one other person that you thought might understand this feeling. Mom said she wouldn't judge, but you'd known her enough timelines to know that she could hold a grudge. Asgore was living proof of this.
You had to go to the source of this. You had to find him. Asriel followed you like a hawk, the thought alone making your skin crawl. He was your only connection to life before… and vice versa. You were both two sides of the same coin, and it had been something you'd forgotten over your countless RESETS before.
How could such a thing happen? How could you believe Flowey wasn't a victim in all of this before? Maybe it was easier to blame the flower for his misdeeds than Asriel, a fulfillment of the dead prince's last wish to you, not to Chara, to you. Remember him as he was, not as the flower.
But Flowey was an outward projection of Asriel's grief. It was like Mom had said. Grief could take many forms. And Asriel was grieving, flower or not. It was only that, as a flower, he couldn't square the circle on his emotions properly. He was stuck without empathy, and so he was stuck with the bitterness, the sadness, the fear, the anger at himself that remained.
And DETERMINATION… that one force that you both shared. You took a breath, steeling yourself before you started walking back toward the opening. Back where you'd fallen. If there was anywhere that Flowey would go, it would be here. There was a reason, after all. His best friend was there.
Walking down the dark passages, you couldn't help but feel eyes were everywhere on you. No monster came this far back to the Ruins except for Toriel. You knew that he was probably following you though. There was always a glimpse, always a flash of greenery that moved out of the corner of your eye.
But he wouldn't be able to resist himself when you called him out HERE, where you fell down… where his Best Friend was buried, rotted away and little more than bones beneath a garden of golden flowers. You looked around a few times, before then looking up to the light from above. The hole you fell through, the barest, closest glimmer of the surface that monsters would ever have… and they chose to live deeper in the mountain.
You sighed at the thought. Freedom for them was so close… six… they had six SOULS, trapped in Asgore's castle… and you were the last one, selfishly keeping yourself down here. No! You refused to believe that it was selfish to keep monsterkind from knowing the kind of sicko you were! You weren't being selfish… you were trying to protect them.
'What about Mom?' you asked yourself. The question came unbidden from you, a simple statement. How were you going to tell her everything you did? Everything that you were?
"I can't…" The statement came out abruptly, an admission of your own weakness. You couldn't break Toriel's heart like that.
"Can't what, Chara?" The sickly sweet tone told you all you needed to know about who was here. Your skin prickled, eyes widened, heart started pounding in your chest. To turn around and see that smiling face on the body of the Golden Flower… it filled you with Apprehension. The crackling of reality opening and a new SAVE point forming told you that this was a point that you couldn't turn back from. You attempted to reach out to the star, but the feeling crawling up your spine kept you.
"Uh–uh–uh," he cooed. "We have unfinished business, Chara."
"You're right," you agreed. Flowey seemed taken aback by that as you took a seat on the flower patch. "Let's talk…"
"I thought you didn't want to talk to me anymore. What's the deal here?" You didn't respond, instead patting the spot in front of you. Flowey took the opportunity, darting beneath the earth and then back up in the spot you'd gestured to. His expression was that of a bored smile, as though he knew something you didn't, or that this wasn't going to be of any consequence for him.
"You know, Chara. You didn't have to come all the way out here to see me."
"I know," you replied. "You've made it clear you can get to me whenever you want." Flowey's grin became sadistic at that point.
"You should know, then, that coming out here alone is a dangerous thing to do."
"I also know that. But like you said. We have UNFINISHED BUSINESS." The flower then gestured with a leaf, like one would a hand to you to talk. "We've been at this… for way too long… why do you bother with me?" The flower remained silent at that question before laughing.
"What kinda stupid question was THAT?! Hahahah! What a JOKE!"
"I'm serious." Flowey stopped at that, his expression settled on something devoid of what you typically saw in him. And then his expression shifted. It became concentration, then frustration, then… nothing.
"Because I think, Chara, we're destined to be here together… forever… even when they leave to go up there."
"I've been up there. It's nothing special."
"Liar, liar, pants on fire! You think I don't know that?!"
"No, you don't."
"And why would that be?!"
"Because every time I RESET, after I had almost SAVED you… you wanted me to RESET your memories!" Flowey needed it spelled out to him. "God, it's PATHETIC… the fact that you DON'T want to remember… but I DO. I can't help but remember… that's why I went on that genocide. Every time you refused… all because you're a stupid flower!" Your outburst had seemingly garnered the reaction you were looking for. Startled silence.
"Chara…"
"No, you need to wake up… every time I nearly SAVED you… you realized that there's one reason only why Chara doesn't want to play anymore. They're dead… right under here, their bones. I can dig 'em up for you to see for yourself. As Asriel… you always recognized that Chara is gone… I'm NOT Chara. I'm Frisk… and I don't want to play your sick, twisted fantasy." Flowey recoiled at this, clearly hurt. A deep part of you hoped that he hurt, that he felt that pain… but the other part of you… it remembered what Mom had said.
"Asriel… please listen."
"No… Asriel is DEAD too! I'm just… y–you don't know anything! You're just saying all of this to get under my skin!"
"No… I'm telling you this so we can finally move on. I don't want to go through the rest of the Underground again… I don't want to be the future of humans and monsters… I just want to be happy, with Mom."
"You don't get to call her that," he bitterly spat.
"She's your Mom too. You could always talk with her, like I've been doing."
"That's the problem though. I. Can't. Feel. ANYTHING! For her!" he snapped. Vines raised up from the ground, green tendrils that tore up the dirt from the ground as he eyed you with malice. You stood your ground, watching and waiting for Flowey to make a move.
"But you clearly feel things. Frustration, sadness, longing… Mom told me that grief shows itself in different ways. You just —"
"Just WHAT?! JUST! WHAT?!" A vine snapped toward you, grazing past your arm. You could feel the sting of the thorns as Flowey threw his tantrum. "I will NEVER understand how you feel… and you will NEVER understand how I feel… only Chara would know!"
"But they're gone… Flowey. They're gone and they aren't coming back." You stood from your spot on the patch of flowers, looking around before back to him. "Is this what they would've wanted? You lashing out at everyone? Asriel… please… just stop. We're done. I wanted to try and SAVE you… I failed. You want to try and SAVE Chara, but they don't need it. They can't be SAVED. You need to remember that…"
At that point, you were done. It was the most you could say. You were taking a great risk in telling him that. "I'm going to go home… and I'm going to tell Mom exactly what I did… maybe after that, I'll be able to move on too." You then started walking past him, ready to move on.
"But they're gone… Flowey. They're… what?" Immediately, you were hit with something… odd. Like you had said that before. Flowey just stared at you, his grin having returned, and cold realization hit you like a bucket of ice.
"Awe, what's wrong FRISK? They're WHAT?"
"They're go—"
"But they're gone… F–Flowey." There it was again. That feeling of déjà vu. And the flower was grinning. This time you didn't even bother to finish your thought. You chose to run.
"But they're… they're…"
"Go ahead," Flowey said, mock happiness in his tone. "I'm waiting."
"Flowey, what are you —"
"But they're… they're gone Asriel! Chara's GONE!"
Before you could even start your thought, Flowey laughed. A callous, cold sound that now haunted you. The truth was there. You couldn't SAVE… so you attempted to LOAD.
"Nuh–uh–uh! You're in a hurry, aren't ya?" Flowey maliciously cackled. Fear settled in your chest, your SOUL feeling like it was cracking under the pressure. "Where are you going? To go see your MOMMY?!" You tried to LOAD.
"Wooooow," Flowey grinned. "And here I thought you were smarter than that. Guess when you're afraid of actually DYING, you'll do ANYTHING to stay alive… even if there's really no reason, right?" The flower gave you a malicious cackle as you realized very quickly that you couldn't do ANYTHING. You were stuck here. With HIM! Not with Asriel, no. You hadn't broken through that shell of spite and anger… you were stuck with the WEED. You settled into a ready stance, halfway ready to charge him.
"You know you can't outlast me Flowey. I got Determination to spare."
"Do you now?!" You didn't know why… but that question brought back the terrible, tingling feeling up your spine. "Oh, wow! Guess I should just give back control and everything will be all fine and dandy, right?!" You didn't respond, simply ready for whatever Flowey was going to throw at your SOUL.
"HA! What a joke! You'd like that, wouldn't you Frisk? I don't know why I EVER saw Chara in you… Chara would've just killed me and been done with it, would've FINISHED THE JOB!"
"Asriel… please don't do this… what would everyone else think if they knew?"
"You should be asking yourself that question, FRISK. What would Mom think if she knew what you were doing?" You moved to try and attack Flowey, only for a sharp, piercing sensation to hit your chest… hard!
You looked down, only realizing after the fact that your HP was at 0. But your SOUL hadn't shattered. Instead, you could see the green tendril, red thorns covering it, embedded in your chest. Then the pain started. It wasn't just pain in your SOUL that echoed in your body. It was REAL pain! Physical pain!
"The one thing that made this a fair fight was that you had the Determination to keep me from physically attacking you and taking your SOUL that way! Even when I was GOD, you had the determination to do it, didn't you?" He was remembering… part of you bitterly felt happy about that. He remembered your battle at the end of all things there… "And that's what makes this time SPECIAL! You don't have ANYTHING left… you used it up when you came back. All I see left is FEAR!" Flowey cackled again, twisting the tendril through your chest.
You coughed up your lung, it felt like… things were starting to go dark.
"Don't worry, buddy! You should sleep now!" he jovially said. You then felt the vine leave you, pulling back and ripping parts of you out. You could see them on the vine, alongside your SOUL… you collapsed, feeling nothing. The last thing you saw was Flowey shrouding himself in those fines, shrouding your SOUL in them. He'd won.
You woke up. You'd almost thought it was another nightmare, ready to curl up next to Mom by the fireplace… but it was only when you realized where you were that what had happened wasn't a nightmare. You had died, perished. You would never see the sun again. Not through your eyes, at least.
You looked around the darkness of the void, ready to throw a wild punch toward wherever HE was. There was the familiar feeling of your SOUL, outside of your body… but something was wrong. There was no tether like there usually was. You were gone, stuck here as a spirit, a ghost, maybe even less than that.
And then his face appeared, like static on a TV screen.
"MMMmm I shoulda done this earlier!" Flowey's grin, probably the most legitimately happy you saw him, faltered, before turning dour and bored, a smile that told of his frustration. "Oh? You're still holding on? So stubborn!" He then winked at you, tauntingly as he kept going. "Lighten up a lil' pal! You do know that this didn't have to happen, right? You had a plan, a simple one." The screen flickered, revealing a twisted, carved expression upon his face, another familiar sight. "SAVE. EVERYONE."
You tried to scream, but found you had no mouth. You desperately tried to scream at him, curse at him, tell Flowey that you weren't looking to hurt him.
"Oh, we both know THAT'S a lie!" Flowey grinned. You startled. He could read your thoughts. He could read your thoughts! Such a sensation of fear. You moved to cry, but remembered you had no eyes either. You just wanted to go back home, back to Mom.
"I guess you're too stupid to follow your own plans, huh? Don't know why I thought this would be any differently. So stubborn… so DETERMINED. You were unpredictable, like Chara… BUT YOU WERE NEVER CHARA… it's like you said." His face flickered to yours, your voice filled with bitterness, spite, HATRED.
"Chara's gone, and they're NEVER coming back!" Flowey's laughter echoed through the Void as you tried to hold on, keep yourself awake. If you fell asleep, Flowey would have your SOUL… it'd be over. There was no doovers here.
"What? You think you can keep resisting like this? Come ON! Haven't you learned from yourself yet? With DETERMINATION, I control EVERYTHING!" What did he mean?
"Oh? What do I mean? Well, buddy, let me show you!" A flash of light, and you were back in the Underground… but something was wrong. You couldn't feel your arms, your legs.
"Flowey!" you called out. Your voice was silent, but Flowey's lips moved as your own.
"Shush!" You startled into submission, looking toward the door across from you… waiting, and waiting, and waiting…
"What's taking 'em?" Flowey's voice echoed around you. "They should've beaten that old hag by now!" You considered leaving, knowing where this was going. But you found that you were little more than a passenger in the flower's body. The waiting became unbearable. You could feel that sense of boredom, that creeping sense of dread.
"You see, this is what I had to deal with. What is this run? Had to be in the hundreds or something. I think we've both lost count! Haha…" The view then switched. It was dinner in the dining room. Your first dinner with Mom. Back all the way to your first run.
"I let you carry on your merry way so many times. You were so DETERMINED… so eager to get to the King. But every time, you'd take your time here… in this crumbling relic from the past." The view kept switching, between many different runs. All the same. Toriel finding you, taking care of you, guiding you through the Ruins.
"This time was different though. You weren't just taking your time here. You wanted to stay here!" Now you could see through the window into the living room. You watched as you saw yourself, knelt against Toriel, sobbing in the agony of what you had done.
"When I found out you wanted to stay? I thought that you were just playing… continuing to play, like you had all the other times before! Haha… that was stupid, wasn't it? You weren't Chara. You weren't going to keep going like you normally did. Like THEY would have!" The view you were given kept shifting, over and over, watching as you went about your business. Doing puzzles with Martlet, meeting with Nabstablook at his usual spot, offering gold on the spiderweb for the spider donuts.
And then you were shown something else. Right in front of you, a gold twinkling.
"It was only just two days ago when I realized that there was something wrong. You weren't LOADING! So I decided to SAVE over your profile. I had control again! I was the PRINCE of this world's future! I could do ANYTHING I wanted!" And then it all went black after the familiar tingle of Determination ran through your entire body. You were back as a bodyless SOUL, in the void that was Flowey. His expression, amused, suddenly turned annoyed.
"Oh come on! You're still here? I thought my story might at least bore you so much that you'd give in!" he complained. You moved to stand your ground, the red outline of your SOUL shining bright and clear. Flowey may have controlled the timeline now, but you were DETERMINED not to let him win this. His expression carved away, terrible and relishing in what he was about to do.
"You really wanna do this the hard way? Haha! Alright then! Let's have a little FUN before I absorb your SOUL for good!" You watched as your outline crumbled away, leaving only the heart-shaped outline of your SOUL where your ghostly body should've been. Flowey's face on the TV screen faded, and, in front of you, he just appeared.
This was the monster that had ruined countless timelines before. This was the real anomaly that Sans was talking about. Flowey the Flower: Chara's best friend.
"Remember what I told you! S!"