Curse of Ignorance Ch 5
I ate my food mechanically, without even tasting whatever I was putting in my mouth. I was not listening in on the gossip and banter that flew back and forth across the table, as was my usual habit. Instead, all that energy that normally went towards experiencing life has been turned inwards. Last night, I was in no state to think. Well, it wasn't like I was in a better state now, even after sleeping. Every time I tried to contemplate what I learned, my mind kept getting stuck on the fact that the white-haired kid had assassins targeting him!
Was this normal? Part and parcel with becoming a jujutsu sorcerer? Was I going to have to worry about assassins coming after me? I didn't sign up for that! I wanted to become a jujutsu sorcerer so I would be in less danger, not more!
I felt tight panic build up in my chest again.
It was hard to breathe.
I wanted to run.
I knew it wasn't logical, but I wanted to run.
My heart didn't care that I have stubby child legs, or that they could have a curse technique to track me no matter where I go, or that the assassins might already know where I live. All my heart knew was that being here was dangerous and I have to run away from the danger if I want to live.
It was hard to breathe.
A touch on my left shoulder. I jumped at the sudden contact, falling out of my chair and spilling out all over the floor. As I got back up on my feet, I heard a voice.
"Hey, are you alright?"
The question came from the sole girl of the friend group whose table I sit at, standing to the left of where my chair would usually be, if it weren't currently knocked over. I think her name was Mio.
She continued speaking. "Sorry for startling you!" Her expression morphed from a look of concern to a sheepish smile as she clapped her hands together, as if she were praying for my forgiveness. "I just noticed that you looked sick, and wanted to ask if you needed a hand going to the infirmary! It's pretty out of the way, so you might not even know where to go if you haven't been there before!"
Huh? I'm not sick, I was just… panicking a little bit! Which is perfectly normal, considering the circumstances!
I decided to tell her as much. "I'm not sick, I was just…. It's something else. Nothing to worry about! No need to go to the infirmary or anything. Thank you, though."
Mio's expression changed once again, going back to concern. "Are you sure? It really wouldn't be any trouble, you know. I was going to go after breakfast to visit a friend anyway."
What? Oh, right, the guy that was missing. So I was right? He got injured in the… assassination attempt… and is now staying in the infirmary until he heals up? For some reason, having another one of my guesses validated didn't feel as good as before.
I made another attempt at brushing off her misplaced kindness. "No, really, it's fine. I'll be better in just a moment."
She looked unconvinced. "If you say so…."
And with that, she reluctantly went back to her usual place at the table, starting to urge her friends to eat faster so they have the time to visit their injured friend as a group.
I righted my chair, sat down in it, and promptly resumed tuning out the world. After all, I still can't wrap my head around the thought of assassins, magic assassins, targeting children! And you know who fits into that demographic? ME!
The academic portion of my day was better than usual, if only because it forced my brain to think about things other than the possibility of an assassination attempt happening right now. Learning about the Heian period, the golden age of both classical Japanese culture and jujutsu sorcery, was a welcome distraction. After all, this era was an age of legendary heroes and villains, the most famous of which is Ryoumen Sukuna, who holds the title of King of Curses even hundreds of years after his death. It's like something out of a story, except it actually happened, which made it even cooler, in my opinion.
Juba-sensei relays this story so engagingly that I would believe it if he said he was actually there at the time. The story goes like this: Ryoumen Sukuna, before he became known as the King of Curses, was actually a human sorcerer. He was the greatest sorcerer of the era, capable of doing the work of hundreds of sorcerers. But one day, Sukuna turned. Instead of using his immense strength to protect humanity, he started cursing humans. Sukuna terrorized Japan, killing hundreds and thousands according to his whims. When squads of jujutsu sorcerers were sent to kill him, they all ended up dying instead. Even when the Fujiwara Clan, a powerful jujutsu family during the Heian Era, sent their strongest sorcerers, the Sun, Moon, and Stars Squad and the Five Empty Generals, to defeat Sukuna, they were crushed utterly and Sukuna crippled the Fujiwara Clan in retaliation. After that, Sukuna, the Disgraced One, ruled Japan. All the jujutsu sorcerers did whatever they could to appease him, going as far as to hold festivals in his honor.
Sukuna ruled for many long years, until he ended up dying of old age. But that's not where the story ends. You see, there exists a strong belief in sorcerer culture that all sorcerers have to die in battle. This doesn't stem from some misguided sense of duty, some belief that it is the responsibility of those with power to spend their lives protecting the weak. No, this belief comes from real, tangible consequences.
In order to explain, we have to first think about what makes jujutsu sorcerers different. What makes jujutsu sorcerers different from normal humans? What makes jujutsu sorcerers different from cursed spirits? The answers to those questions are easy. Jujutsu sorcerers can control cursed energy, while normal humans can't. Jujutsu sorcerers have bodies of flesh, while cursed spirits have bodies composed entirely out of cursed energy. Secondly, what makes jujutsu sorcerers similar? What makes jujutsu sorcerers similar to normal humans? What makes jujutsu sorcerers similar to cursed spirits? Again, the answers come easily. Both jujutsu sorcerers and humans are outwardly the same because they both possess the same body made of flesh. Both jujutsu sorcerers and cursed spirits are able to naturally control cursed energy.
Thinking about it like this, it is very easy to come to the conclusion that jujutsu sorcerers are existences that straddle the line between human and cursed spirit. And due to this nature, it is possible to turn a jujutsu sorcerer into a cursed spirit. How? Simply remove the thing that makes a jujutsu sorcerer similar to humans. Remove their fleshly body. In other words, jujutsu sorcerers turn into cursed spirits when they die. Whether it be by old age, disease, or a bullet to the brain, it doesn't matter. All forms of death can cause this reincarnation into a cursed spirit.
There is only one exception. It takes a curse to kill a curse. When jujutsu sorcerers die in battle against cursed spirits, they never reincarnate into cursed spirits themselves. When cursed energy is involved in the death of a jujutsu sorcerer, the cursed energy kills the reformation into a cursed spirit before it even begins. It's funny, in a kind of sick, twisted way. Jujutsu sorcerers dedicate so much of their lives exorcizing curses, only to get exorcized back at the end of their life. At that moment, the roles reverse. The monsters become the heroes, and the heroes become the monsters.
Sukuna did not die to any kind of curse, whether it be by a cursed spirit or by a jujutsu sorcerer. He was the strongest sorcerer of the era, capable of crushing any who dared try to make an attempt on his life. Sukuna died of old age, and came back, worse than ever before. He became a twisted rendition of a human being, a creature with four arms and two faces, allowing him to chant and perform hand signs in ways that a normal jujutsu sorcerer would never be able to do.
Sukuna turned his newfound power to the task of tightening his grip on Japan, killing and occasionally eating any and all that showed even a hint of the potential needed to oppose him. After all, this was the Heian era, the golden age of jujutsu. Sorcerers that would be considered extraordinary talents today were being born left and right during that time. Some say that this was an attempt by the Heavens themselves to balance the scales, by trying to create a sorcerer that was equal to the sheer might that was Ryoumen Sukuna.
This is where the story gets a bit hazy. Eventually, the world must have succeeded at creating the equal to Sukuna, and Sukuna himself must have gotten a bit lazy hunting down potential rivals. Because one day, without any prior warning, Sukuna disappeared off the face of this world.
It took an entire year before anyone mustered up enough courage to investigate what happened to Ryoumen Sukuna. In Sukuna's grand dwelling, his corpse was found, with all twenty of his fingers severed.
One might think that this is normal, for Sukuna's corpse to be found. Those people would be wrong. Cursed spirits don't leave behind corpses. They are beings composed entirely out of cursed energy. When they die, all the energy that makes them up dissipates, no traces left behind.
So why did Sukuna leave behind a corpse? Because every single body part–all twenty fingers and the rest of the body–became a cursed object. Even as a cursed object, Sukuna is nearly unparalleled. All twenty of his fingers hold an amount of cursed energy that is almost unthinkable to the average sorcerer. The body itself is comparatively weaker, but that's only comparatively. In absolute terms, the body is about on par with a top-grade sorcerer.
The fact that they had no idea as to what the cause of his death could be left a bad taste in the jujutsu sorcerers' mouths. So, in order to ensure that this was not some sort of ploy on the part of Sukuna, they tried to destroy his corpse.
It proved to be impossible. No matter what techniques they employed, what kind of resources they burned, not a scratch was made on the fingers. The body was only slightly damaged after the efforts of all the sorcerers of Japan.
All that the sorcerers could do was seal the fingers and the body, scattering them all over Japan, in the hopes that if this was some grand plan on the part of Sukuna, it could not come into fruition with his corpse separated by such great distances.
And that's where the story of Ryoumen Sukuna, King of Curses, ends. There was some additional stuff, like how some of the fingers got lost or stolen over time, but Juba-sensei didn't go into that too much, since it was getting off topic. I was unsatisfied after hearing this conclusion from Juba-sensei. After all, there are many questions left unanswered. What killed Sukuna? Was it a person? If so, what happened to them? Why didn't this hypothetical person announce to the world that Sukuna was dead? Was it Sukuna himself? If so, what would make him do such a thing? Why were the fingers cut off?
But I guess that this kind of uncertainty comes part and parcel with history. With history, you only get to know what is recorded, whether it be through writing or oral tradition. With a story, you have theoretical omniscience, if you can convince the author to answer all your questions. Reality has no guarantee of a satisfying end. Well, stories don't either, because of bad storytelling and poor planning, but you get the point. At least all these questions give me something to distract myself with that's not assassins.
Something struck me, as I practiced a leg sweep with the rest of the class in the training field. Isn't martial arts designed for fighting other humans, not monsters with weird body shapes like curses? Sure, learning how to throw a proper punch or kick will always be useful, but leg sweeps? What about if the curse doesn't have legs? Or has so many legs that even if I sweep one or two out from under them, they are still able to stay standing? Doesn't this mean that the school acknowledges and is knowingly preparing us to fight other humans by teaching us this kind of stuff? I wasn't sure how I felt about that.
After all, not all people are good people. It's not like being a jujutsu sorcerer magically means that everyone is friends. Sometimes, people are selfish. Sometimes, people are willing to sacrifice the wellbeing of others for the sake of their own selfishness. It makes sense that good sorcerers are needed to take care of the bad sorcerers. It makes sense to train us to deal with this very likely scenario.
However, I felt deceived. Well, more deceived than I was before, considering that I was brought here on the pretense of being accepted into a "technical school". Even so, I was under the impression that I would only have to fight monsters. The thought of fighting people, no matter how many terrible things they did, just feels different.
There are no moral complications with fighting curses. For the most part, they are mindless monsters that are instinctually driven to cause suffering, because suffering is food for them. It's pretty much a no-brainer that killing curses is a good thing.
Fighting people, though…. I'm not saying I'm a pacifist, I'm just saying there's a lot more to think about, you know? Let's say that, hypothetically, there is a sorcerer that is attempting to take my life. And that after this sorcerer kills me, he plans to murder some innocent bystanders, too. Would I be willing to attempt to kill this guy back? Would I even have the leeway to make this decision? Because there aren't just moral implications, too. There are also issues of practicality.
People have intelligence, which makes them infinitely more risky to fight. It only takes one mistake for you to die in a fight. That one deadly mistake is much easier to make when you are facing off against people that are actively trying to use their intelligence to trick you and kill you, rather than fighting a monster that only knows how to throw their body in your general direction. Am I the type of person to gamble with my own life in order to save the life of the person trying to kill me?
Honestly, I don't know. I decided for myself that my first and foremost goal was to not die. I thought that meant that I would go to this school, learn how to fight curses in case I ever encounter one, and then lay low. Now, however, there are complications. I might be put into a position where I have to kill someone for the sake of my own survival. I might just become collateral damage to someone else's assassination attempt.
With this new development, I was seriously considering quitting and running away. But is that really the right choice? My previous reasoning is still valid. I still have that chance of encountering a curse in a dark alley. If I run away, I won't be prepared to deal with that situation. Still, continuing to be here feels too much like being purposefully ignorant to the risk I'm taking on. If I stay here, then what was the point? What was the point of the investigation, of being so fearful for my life, of thinking this much?
I couldn't come to a decision. I need something to tip the scales. In the end, I need more information. How common will fighting other people be as a jujutsu sorcerer? How common are assassination attempts? Will I have to kill people? Or is there some sorcerer jail that I don't know about? If there is a sorcerer jail, how common are prison escapes?
I don't think they keep records on assassination rates in the school library. Well, maybe they do? Either way, the library is probably not the most efficient use of my time. I've visited the library a couple of other times since the first visit that led to my acquisition of the book on hand signs. The library isn't organized at all, seeming to function on a "take whatever you want, return books wherever you want" system. Not very good when I want information sooner rather than later.
I can't ask Juba-sensei about this kind of stuff. He and Shirawachi-sensei covered up the assassination attempt as a training accident for an unknown reason. Asking about assassination rates so soon after the assassination attempt they tried to cover up is practically confessing that I know their secret, and who knows what they will do then? It's practically guaranteed that I'll be forced into a binding vow like the rest of the Shirawachi-sensei's class, and there's no guarantee that I will get the information I want. I guess I can vow silence in exchange for information? But the teachers might not agree to that, and honestly, they have all the power in this relationship. They have the potential to force me to take the vow regardless of whatever demands I make.
I can't ask my mealtime tablemates or anyone else from Shirawachi-sensei's class either. If I'm going off of what happened two days ago, any information that they know is likely to be sealed off under a binding vow. I can predict it already. Even if I get a good chance to ask them questions, the answers are all going to be "I can't say", "I can't tell you that", or complete silence.
No, I already know who to ask. That white-haired kid. At the very least, I know that he's not under a binding vow. If he was, he wouldn't have been able to complain about assassins and kidnappers around me, no matter how offhanded the comment was. Though, I get the impression that this kid gets targeted often, based on how casual he was about it. I have to keep in mind that this kid might be an outlier, and not a representative of the average sorcerer. If he is an outlier though, surely he knows just how much his experiences skew from the norm, right?
I turned my attention to Shirawachi-sensei's side of the training field. The subject of my thoughts was very easily located, considering the unusual hair and clothing. As my gaze fell upon my target, he immediately turned his head, locking gazes with me without any hesitation. I was immediately unnerved. How could he tell that I was looking at him so quickly!? It wasn't only the speed with which he detected my gaze that was so unnerving, his eyes themselves also possessed a creepy quality to them.
I never noticed it before, because the majority of my time interacting with him was composed of me following him from behind, meaning that I didn't have many opportunities to get a good look at his face. His eyes were an electric blue that seemed to glow with an inner light. Those eyes were unnatural. No human could ever have eyes like that. I could overlook the white hair—albinos have that too—but the eyes? Completely impossible. Faced with that alien gaze, I could only be reminded of the fact that the last time we met, he threatened me. "Next time, I won't be so nice." Maybe getting the information I wanted is going to be harder than I initially thought.