Prompt: Could you write a fanfiction set during the events of the season 8 finale where Kensi and Deeks take a moment to grieve and comfort each other over Michelle's death and Sam's heartache, taking place after Callen and Sam leave the scene, but before they get back to Ops?
A/N: This one was a little difficult since I didn't want Kensi and Deeks to come off as selfish.
Deeks glanced around the crime scene, shaking his head at the carnage left behind. The coroner had taken Michelle's—had taken Michelle, and Callen and Sam had left shortly after. Only a few cops remained, processing the last of the evidence, and so forth.
It was horrific, not in the least because they'd been so close. So close to saving Michelle, to keeping Sam's life whole. He kept running through what they could have done differently, where they'd been too slow or too stupid to it the pieces together. And Michelle had paid the price.
Turning away from the lines of caution tape, Deeks glanced around for Kensi. He'd last seen her talking to one of the LAPD officers maybe 15 minutes ago, but had lost track of her since.
A rush of panic, and the sudden, intense need to find her had him ducking back under the yellow tape. He didn't think Tahir would attack her, but he needed to check for his own peace of mind. After a few minutes, he found her tucked away at the very back of the building.
"Kensi? Did you find something else?" he asked, covering his relief at the sight of her.
"No, I, uh, I needed a minute," she said softly.
"Sam and Callen already left, so we should probably get back." Kensi nodded in response, just the edge of her jaw visible, but it was enough for him to tell she was barely holding back tears. "Hey, come here."
"I'm fine, I just—" she waved her hand in a vague gesture, keeping her body firmly turned away from him.
"Kens."
At the sound of her name, she crumpled, shoulders caving inward as she cupped her palms over her face.
"Oh baby," he murmured, gently taking her arm, and she didn't resist when he tugged her into his arms. Burying her face in his chest, Kensi gripped the back of his shirt so tightly, he felt her nails dig slightly into his skin. Her shoulders heaved with silent sobs.
"I can't believe this happened," she gasped. "Michelle's gone. I thought we'd find her in time."
"I know, me too." He swallowed heavily, his anger from before giving way to sadness. He clutched Kensi to him, breathing in her familiar scent, the comforting press of her body against his.
After a few minutes Kensi heaved a sigh, rubbing both hands over her damp cheeks as she eased back.
"What are we going to do?"
"We're going to take a minute, grieve, for Michelle, for Sam," he said in a gravelly voice, brushing his fingers up and down Kensi's back. "And then we do whatever it takes to find Tahir. Because that's what Sam's going to need right now. We support him however we can."
"It won't make this right," she said, shaking her head. "Nothing will."
"I know it won't. But it's the best we can do."
Kensi pressed her lips together, visibly fighting for control of her emotion. She looked up at Deeks, carefully cupping his cheeks, and leaned in to kiss him. "I love you," she said with great intent in her voice.
He was almost certain she was thinking of Sam and Michelle, and the utter unpredictability of the future.
"I love you too." He embraced her again, allowing himself one more moment of selfishness. "Now let's go help Sam."
A/N: I hope this is alright, if a little different than what you might have imagined. I'll admit while I did review a few clips and the transcript, I did not rewatch this arc, so I apologize for any mistakes.
Rest in peace, Michelle.