A/N: Just a random little angsty fic I came up with. Set somewhere in season 4 before "Parley".
"So, how's Mrs. Lawrence?" Kensi asked teasingly, watching Deeks get into the SUV with a smirk. He acknowledged her with an unamused grimace, tossing his duffle bag into the back. "I see you're wearing different clothes, so it must have been a good visit."
"You're hilarious," Deeks grumbled.
Deeks had spent most of the last two weeks with Mrs. Maggie Lawrence on an undercover operation. While Maggie wasn't a suspect herself, someone within her business was implicated in a major case of fraud. In order to gain information, Deeks had easily inserted himself to Maggie Lawrence's universe.
Maggie seemed charmed from the start, happily accepting Deeks onto her staff, and into her bed, from all accounts. Kensi luckily didn't have to listen in on most of their interactions, which would have been intolerable. Kensi told herself that was because she found the thought of Deeks in any romantic context was revolting.
"It's amazing all the duties a senior advisor position comes with," Kensi continued dryly. She would never tell Deeks that she'd spent the entire drive and wait for him thinking of scathing jokes. "Pool boy among them."
"Oh my god, Kens, would you please just give it a rest." Pinching the bridge of her nose, Deeks inhaled sharply. "This isn't any different than when you have to come on to a guy."
"Mm, but somehow I usually manage to keep my clothes on." Kensi pressed her pointer finger to her chin, pretending to think as she turned the steering wheel with her other hand to pull into traffic. "Your shirt isn't buttoned right, by the way."
Deeks glanced down at his shirt, at the misaligned buttons, plucked at it half-heartedly, then gave up.
She could feel the frustration and exhaustion rolling off him, and logically, she knew that he'd been doing far more than romancing Maggie Lawrence. Longer term undercover work was hard as it was, but Deeks, as usual had thrown himself into the role, and come back with impressive results already.
Somehow, she couldn't stop herself though. Every time she thought of Deeks spending time with another woman; kissing her, touching her—it made her irrationally angry.
"I wonder what the going rate for a gigolo is," she mused.
"You know, I don't like doing this anymore than you do," Deeks snapped, his voice unexpectedly bitter despite the underlying lack of energy. "Especially with someone like Maggie, who is probably completely innocent. I don't enjoy the lying, and certainly don't enjoy taking advantage of her. And yes, I do feel like a creep every time."
"Deeks—" Kensi started to object, dismayed at the self-condemnation Deeks had just spewed.
"Can we just go back to the mission now?"
She wanted to say something else, to apologize, or assure him that she didn't really think of him that way. The words wouldn't come though, and so she said nothing, silently driving.
The next time she looked over, Deeks had fallen asleep.