This fic is almost over! It's so bittersweet! Enjoy this quick chapter (the only thing between you and the epilogue) AND I am minutes away from posting THE BONUS/KILE POV of key moments SO KEEP AN EYE OUT FOR THAT TOO!

I'd never stuck a fork in an outlet before, but I imagined this was close to the same sensation. I felt it head to toe, a current running through my body. You could've knocked me out with a feather, but Kile held me steady, somehow still forming the steps of a waltz.

"Me," I replied faintly. "Me?"

He nodded, grim-faced. "You."

My mind was racing, my entire body buzzing. I couldn't form words with multiple syllables, shell-shocked. "But…your dream. Your job."

I was stuck there, couldn't move past it. From the Selection to now, I had refused to insert myself into Kile's life because of his lofty ambitions. All he'd ever wanted was to leave: I couldn't put myself above that, and I couldn't understand why he would ever do that willingly.

"You design dresses, right?"

I blinked. It wasn't something I usually talked about. "Yes, but why-"

"But you don't sell them. You don't even let other people see them," Kile went on. I nodded uncertainly; all of that was true. "You don't do it for other people or for money; you do it because it's something you're passionate about. Eadlyn, that's what architecture is for me."

My breath caught in my throat, but I nodded, finally realizing what he was getting at.

"I tried it, and I really did learn a lot from the job you got me, but the truth is, I don't want to build malls or skyscrapers. I want to design hospitals and homeless shelters and things that really make the world better." His eyes were lit up with passion. I couldn't look away. "Unfortunately, every architecture firm in the world would rather take the jobs that make more money."

I exhaled. "So that's why you quit? Because I could fund-"

He shook his head. "I could've lived with it. I quit, because…well, when you kissed me at Josie's wedding-"

My heart dropped. If we had to talk through what I still considered to be my most shameful moment, I didn't want to do it in a crowded room.

At the same time, I couldn't quite bring myself to shut him down.

"-I realized Alice and I weren't going anywhere. Because she's not you."

For the first time, hearing her name didn't cut me like a knife. This was different.

I still couldn't speak. Kile continued, steady as he'd always been. "So I came back here. I mean, I thought I was crazy for it, one kiss that probably didn't mean anything-"

"It meant something," I interjected, finally finding my voice. Forget the crowded room, the couples spinning around us; it felt for all the world like we were alone. I couldn't tell you what song was playing or how many minutes were left until midnight; all I knew was Kile right in front me, previously so far out of my reach—or so I thought.

He bit his lip; something sparked in his eyes. Hope, maybe. Had I really not given him any reason to hope before now?

Of course not. I'd run from it, protected my own pride when little did I know, I could have had him. It was a choice I would not make again.

"I called and quit yesterday. I had to be all in, no matter how this turned out. I've wanted to tell you…I have no idea what's going on in your head, Eadlyn. I was going to tell you last night. Tell you everything," he added pointedly.

Easier last night, indeed.

Guilt washed over me. "And I messed it up. I'm sorry. When I realized…um…I didn't know how to handle it. I still don't. This is…"

A shock. Not part of the plan. Something I had decided I could never deserve. "…entirely unprecedented."

A stark contrast to my deep and personal revelation, Kile burst out laughing. "Entirely unprecedented? Eadlyn, we spent as much of this past week as possible in bed. It really never occurred to you, that I might…"

"I thought it was just physical for you," I admitted it.

"I thought the same about you."

Time slowed down. I was dimly aware of the chanting in the background, just seconds until midnight, but it didn't matter. Nothing besides the two of us mattered, on the edge of something I'd previously ruled out, somehow still swaying together as if everything was the same as it had been five minutes ago.

"It wasn't," I managed, summoning all my courage. I'd addressed crowds of thousands before, projected my voice to the entire nation, but this was different. This was harder; this meant more. "Just physical, I mean. Kile, I'm in love with you."

A secret I'd planned to keep forever, released into the world. Holding my breath, I watched Kile's expression soften and turn into a grin. The room around us exploded—for a moment, I feared someone had overhead my admission, but then I realized confetti was raining down from the ceiling, everyone else was shouting, "HAPPY NEW YEAR!", and Ahren was pulling Camille in for a New Year's Kiss.

Kile bit his lip. His blue eyes shone. "In case it wasn't obvious, I love you too."

It had been obvious, apparently, to everyone except me. Ugh, Mom and Marlee were going to be so annoying about this.

I couldn't really care about that, not when Kile was pulling me in for the first kiss that mattered in front of everybody. When the room exploded a second time, thunderous applause and a wolf whistle I suspected was Ean, it may have had something to do with us, breathless and certainly both wanting more. Kile tried to play it off like the kiss was no big deal, but I didn't, grabbing his hand and tightly interlocking his fingers with mine. I'd waited long enough for this, messed it up enough times. I didn't want to waste another second dancing around it.

So much was still uncertain. Kile still had an entire apartment full of stuff in Bonita, and I'd declared to the whole world that I was single just a few hours ago. We had a lot of explaining to do, both to the nation at large and our close family and friends—currently, Josie was hopping up and down with excitement, and I'd never seen anyone smile as big as Henri was, and it was a good thing Osten didn't currently have access to cymbals. Obviously they would have questions—I had questions too, and presumably so did Kile, but that all paled in comparison to our moment, the realization that we didn't have to let each other go, and I intended to celebrate that long into the night.