Prologue:

Dear Belly,

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry for that day, the day of the wedding, and for all of the times before that where I hurt you or shut you out. I want you to know that if I could go back and do things differently, I would. If I could pick one moment out of all the shitty moments in my life to re-do, I'd start with how I lost the most real thing I've ever had. You.

I've rewritten this letter so many times, trying to find the right words to say to you, but I've realized sending it is what actually matters because I've learned something very important during our time apart. Something I wish I would've learned sooner: it's not enough to just love someone, you have to tell them. This is me trying to do that.

The truth is simple, Belly. The truth is I miss you and missing you is a pain I wouldn't wish upon anyone. Life without you feels incomplete like a beach without the sun or a night sky without stars. You are one of the best people I've ever known and I think about you all the time. I worry about you, but Laurel and Steven tell me you're okay, that you're happy. I dream that what I hear is true, because that's all I've ever wanted for you, is to be happy.

As for me, I don't think I'll ever get the little girl who dances around in princess nightgowns singing Bye Bye Birdie out of my head, out of my heart, or out of my system. I've come to accept the fact that you'll always live there and I'll never stop looking for you in every crowd, every corner of the world, hoping and wishing it's you I find. Maybe it's too little too late to say it but it doesn't make it any less true. I love you. When I close my eyes at night, you are all I see, Belly. There is no room in my heart for anyone else and I've spent countless nights awake, haunted by the thought that maybe things could have been different if I'd only told you sooner.

I know you're happy with your new life in Paris. Maybe you have someone else now. Maybe you'll never write back which is your right I guess. But if you ever find yourself in a similar position where you feel like something's missing, I'm here. I'm only a letter away.

P.S. Laurel told me you got lost the other day looking for Sour Patch Kids. Maybe this economy-sized bag will finally prove it – that there's no sugarcoating the infinite love I have for you.

Take care of yourself out there, Belly. I hope to hear from you soon when you're ready.

I'll wait forever if I have to.

Love,

Conrad

I waited months and months for a reply, holding onto hope just like I had held onto the polaroid in my wallet, that she would write back. I guess it was my own fault really for getting my hopes up because I'd told her in the letter she didn't have to write me back and she didn't. She never did.

Her letter never came.

You know those stories about love and blind hope? Yeah, this isn't one of those.

Because real life doesn't always happen like the movies or tv shows. Real life is messy. And real love? It's even messier. Hope only gets you so far.

But fate on the other hand? Well, I never really believed in it until that summer. The summer of Capri. The summer that showed me love doesn't always happen the same way twice and maybe that's the magic of it. It happens when you least expect it but I'd take it a step further and argue it only finds you when you're finally ready to fight for it.

And this? This is our story.

It all started with a wedding.