Author's Note:

In case it wasn't clear, Belly never received Conrad's letter and he obviously never received hers. This will make for a very interesting reunion. What could possibly go wrong? ;)

Chapter 1

Two Years Later

Conrad:

The plane dips as it makes its final descent, its engines humming in harmony with the soft whispers of the Mediterranean sea.

I look out of the window, admiring how the shimmering turquoise waters meet the sky in an endless stretch of blue. I had always been a sucker for an ocean view. Blue had always been one of my favorite colors, second to that perfect shade of chocolate brown, the color of her eyes. It was strange to think we were finally on the same side of the world for once, so close yet so far away.

"Did you hear me, man?" Jack laughs beside me, swirling his drink idly in his hand.

I turn my head, pulled back into reality, "Sorry, what was that?"

"Some of the bridesmaids are coming out tonight to celebrate with us." He elbows my side with a wink. "Sounds like Fisher's about to get lucky."

"Jack, lay off him!" Our friend, Tanner, snorts from behind us, kicking his seat. "We all know Conrad's not interested unless it's the mystery girl from the polaroid!"

They were never going to let me live down the time they found the polaroid of her in my apartment and honestly? I couldn't blame them. Who the hell keeps a polaroid of their ex? But that's the thing, even after all of this time, I couldn't get rid of it. She could never be just an ex to me. She was so much more than that.

"Exactly." Jack retorts, sipping his drink. "Maybe these Italian girls will finally show Fisher what he's missing."

"Don't hold your breath." I laugh, looking back out the window.

The plane touches down in Naples International Airport and as soon as we step off the tarmac, the humid Italian air greets us like a warm hug. We make our way through the bustling airport, the chatter of different dialects filling the air, waiting in long lines for customs, eager to get to our final destination: Capri, Italy. Our good friend, Reed, from medical school was getting married this weekend and I couldn't be happier for the guy. I was probably the closest to Reed out of our friend group. He was more reserved like me and we were both set on going into oncology. His mother had passed away from brain cancer so we'd always had this quiet understanding of each other. Most of Reed's groomsmen were our circle of friends from medical school so you could say we all knew each other fairly well. There was never a dull moment with this group.

A lot of the guys gave Reed shit for only dating Mia for a year before he proposed to her but sometimes you just know when you know. I think I was the only one who didn't give him shit about it because I had known that feeling once. I remember it well. The feeling of falling so hard for someone you could never dream of being with anyone else and I'd probably never feel that way ever again. Reed was serious about Mia and their story was pretty cute actually. She was an exchange student from Italy, studying to be a nurse in the states, and the moment he laid eyes on her at the hospital he said it was love at first sight. They hit it off immediately and before we all knew it, Reed was spending more time studying with her than with us. Mia's family was from Capri, where they owned a vineyard and ran a family wine business. They were very well-off so they had offered to pay for the entire wedding which blew Reed and his family away. I had never been to Italy before so when Reed sat us down and asked us to be his groomsmen it didn't take much convincing on my part either. I wouldn't miss his big day for the world. Reed was my favorite friend I had made during medical school, someone I could actually see myself staying in touch with long after these days were behind us.

Italy was everything Laurel had said it would be. The drive from the airport to the port at the Marina Grande alone was breathtaking. I had spoken with Laurel a few times on the phone the weeks before the trip. She gave me some travel advice as well as some things to do in Capri in my spare time given that she and Cleveland were quite the world travelers now. The taxi takes sharp turns through the streets of Naples lined with colorful buildings, scooters zipping by, and the lingering aroma of espresso in the air. Soon the road trades the lively energy of the city for rugged cliffs and serene coastline. The hills are covered with lush vegetation dotted with charming villas, overlooking the sea. I took a few pictures with my phone to savor the view for later. The Amalfi Coast was truly something else.

We finally boarded the ferry at the port of Marina Grande, the last leg of our long travel day, and I looked out at the water, leaning against the railing, the scent of saltwater thick in the air, the breeze tousling my hair. I had never been overseas like this before but being out on the water was one of my favorite places to be. It was familiar and foreign all at once. As the ferry cuts through the water, the island of Capri slowly emerges into view, perking our group right up. It's nestled right against the cliffs like a jewel dropped from the heavens, the sun casting shadows onto the water, and it almost looks too fake to be real, a postcard but in real life. It was that beautiful. I snap a few pictures of it in awe to show Laurel later, knowing the lens still wouldn't do a view like that justice.

The journey to the hotel isn't so bad either. Italy was growing on me fast. We walk into the hotel lobby and three receptionists welcome us with warm smiles right away. They greet us in Italian first then begin to check us in one by one. Jack is ahead of me and when he steps out of line, he gives me this look of "dude, she's hot". I chuckle under my breath, stepping forward, and she asks for my name. I give her my full name and she scans the reservation list then nods. She begins to make friendly conversation as she checks me in and it hits me halfway through that she was flirting with me. She looks like she was around our age but I don't flirt back.

"Alright, you're all set." Her fingers brush mine as she hands me the key card, maintaining eye contact. "Your room is on the fifth floor."

"Thank you." I take the key card.

"Enjoy your stay, Conrad Fisher." She flashes a pearly white smile against her dark skin. "Please let me know if there is anything else I can do for you."

She was pretty enough that most guys would think about this interaction for the rest of their day or at the very least ask for her number with the way she was smiling, holding eye contact for a beat longer than what's considered friendly, but I just sling my bag over my shoulder, murmuring a quick thanks, before turning around.

"Yes, Conrad Fisher." Jack throws his arm around my shoulders as we round the corner to the elevators, "Please let me know if there is anything else I can do for you." He batts his eyes, mockingly.

"Fuck off." I laugh, pressing the button for the elevator. Jack continues to tease me, the boys joining on it. I knew they would give me shit for not flirting back but I also think they were all just used to it at this point because I very rarely did.

The groomsmen make plans to go out later then we head to our individual rooms to freshen up. It wasn't a big room by any means but it was all I would need for the next few days. The view of the coast more than made up for its size anyway. Truth be told, I was just happy to be here. There was nothing like a change in scenery after ending another term of medical school. It was the end of May, right on the cusp of summer, and I was enjoying my freedom from the shackles of textbooks and lecture halls.

I take a long but much needed shower after the long travel day then I unpack my suitcase with a towel tied around my waist. I gaze out the window periodically, watching the happy couples and families stroll by on the streets below. I think about my parents and how they had spent the majority of their honeymoon in Italy. My mom had shown Jere and I the pictures once. I remember the pictures well because it was one of the only times I had ever seen my parents head over heels in love. They had been laughing over glasses of wine, stopping on the street to kiss with gelato dripping from their hands, posing together on a boat with windswept hair. I hadn't thought about those pictures in a long time and being here where they had made some of their happiest memories was stirring up a lot of feelings.

I go up to the window, folding a shirt, envying the couples from afar, with a familiar ache in my chest. Views and places like this were dangerous. They made you wish you had someone to share it with and at the risk of sounding very honest, there was only one person I wanted to share a view like this with, but that ship had sailed ages ago. As I got older though and watched all of my friends get engaged or enter serious relationships, it didn't stop the intrusive thoughts from crossing my mind:

What if I never found love again? What if I never got married? What if I end up just like him? Just like my dad?

Successful yet utterly alone.

It was a thought that kept Conrad Fisher up at night more than he'd like to admit these days.

Belly:

Who the hell invented high heels? And why do I get the feeling that it was a man?

I had never run so fast in my entire life. I was sure that I'd have blisters come tomorrow.

My train had been delayed from Paris so I was running behind schedule. I had just enough time to check into my hotel, change into my dress, and freshen up before I was on-the-go again. I was grateful I had curled my hair this morning so I could just pin it back. I end up fast-walking to the venue, not having the patience to bother with a cab. I had a very exciting but long day ahead of me. A wedding! I was working at a small photography firm in Paris, my first real job fresh out of college, and this weekend we had booked our biggest gig yet. I'd been working there for a little less than a year now and sometimes it would lead to fun weekends like this where I'd get to travel somewhere new, other times it was studio sessions capturing portraits or products for local businesses. I loved the freedom and adventure that came with photography. I wasn't sure if I would do weddings forever, they were stressful, but it was a great way to build my portfolio nonetheless.

As soon as I arrive at the venue, my jaw is on the floor. The view was out of this world. The wedding ceremony was taking place at the Gardens of Augustus, set atop a cliff, overlooking the azure waters below, with Faraglioni rocks to the left and the Marina Piccola Bay to the right. It was the prettiest destination wedding one could ever dream of, something straight out of a magazine. I meet up with the head photographer and videographer. We capture shots and details of the venue. The calm before the storm. Then we spend the rest of the morning with the bride as she gets ready in her suite nearby. The head photographer and I capture all of the special moments with her mother who was her maid of honor as well as her and her bridesmaids doing each other's makeup, laughing and reminiscing over old memories. I always found this part of wedding shoots the hardest for some reason. It stirred up a lot of memories from the past, a lingering sadness in my heart that never quite faded. I take a picture of her and her mom hugging each other in the mirror, and it makes me miss my own mother. I make a mental note to give my mom a call this weekend. It had been awhile.

Before we know it, guests are trickling in to find their seats, and the ceremony officially begins. The head photographer gives me a few pointers before we walk off in opposite directions to capture the big day. I'm in the middle of snapping shots of the wedding party, the groomsmen escorting the bridesmaids down the aisle, when it happens. I look down at the shot I'd just taken, shielding the screen from the harsh glare of the sun, squinting down at the photo. Then when I raise the camera to my face again, a couple steps into view, and suddenly, the entire world stops turning. It was like a rug had been pulled from beneath my feet. Everything went quiet – the buzz of the crowd, the music playing, all of it – when I saw who was in the center of the frame. I nearly drop the camera from my hands. It was him. It was Conrad. And it knocks the fucking air out of my lungs.

I slowly lower the camera from my face in disbelief, taking him in with my own eyes this time, standing just a few feet away. I immediately take a step back, feeling like I can't breathe. I was relieved that everyone's attention was on the wedding party, because, for a moment, I genuinely thought I might pass out. This couldn't be real. Was I imagining this? I close my eyes, trying to steady my racing heart, but when I open them again, he's still there. And he looks so real, so impossibly handsome, so perfect, that it hurts. All of it hurts.

He was dressed in a beige suit and brown dress shoes, matching with the rest of the groomsmen, but he stood out. He always did. He was the tallest and his stature was more solid, more manly, with the way his broad shoulders filled out his suit in a way I'd never seen before. His hair was long, the breeze brushing it across his forehead, and I watched as he ran a hand through it, trying to keep it tamed, something I'd watched him do a million times. It made my heart pinch, the familiarity of it, the way it was so Conrad coded. My heart drops to my stomach when the bridesmaid holding onto his arm says something to him, and he leans down to listen, their faces just inches apart. It was clear from the way they looked at each other, the way she smiled at him, that she was his girlfriend, and I had to force myself to look away, feeling sick to my stomach, holding back tears. But when I felt the weight of the camera in my hands, I give myself a harsh reality check. I had to remind myself where I was and what I was here to do. I had a job to finish. It was too late to back out now. I had no choice but to push through. I just had to get through the next few hours without breaking down, even if all I wanted to do was vanish into thin air.

The shot I take of them walking down the aisle nearly breaks my heart in half but I capture it anyway, proving to myself that I can, that I'm a professional. As they reach the altar and go their separate ways, Conrad joins the rest of the groomsmen, taking his place beside them, rolling his shoulders back to face the crowd. Seeing him up there, standing tall and confident in a suit, stirs so many emotions inside me. I was thankful for the grand scale of this wedding because, at least for now, I didn't think he had noticed me. I was doing my best to keep it that way, but I knew eventually, he'd spot me when it came time to photograph the bride. No matter how hard I tried to focus on the rest of the wedding party, my eyes kept drifting back to him, stealing glances when I could. His face was relaxed, easygoing, a contrast to the last time I'd seen him with bloodshot eyes and a bruise on his face, there because of me. I flinch at the memory. A man now stood in the place of the teenager I once knew who had carried the weight of the world on his shoulders and it was strange to think I didn't know a single thing about him when I used to know everything. One of the groomsmen says something in his ear, and Conrad flashes his signature smirk, letting out a soft chuckle. It makes my heart ache. At least he was happy. There was some relief in that, right?

Eventually, everyone stands for the bride as she makes her grand entrance and I walk over, saying a little prayer in my heart that I would make it through this without making a fool of myself. I made a quick decision at that moment to not look in his direction once for the rest of the ceremony. It was the only way I would survive this. I would put all of my attention and focus on the bride. I would get this right for her, for the happy couple, even if it broke me.

The music swells as her father starts to escort her down the aisle, and I capture a stunning shot of the long train of her dress, gracefully floating behind her, with the flowers her grandma had sewed onto her veil. I followed closely behind, keeping my face hidden behind the camera, feeling the stares of the crowd.

Was it too late to run away?

Conrad:

All of us groomsmen glance at Reed as he fights back tears, watching the love of his life walk toward him.

I smile as he starts to lose it, wiping his eyes, then I turn my attention back to Mia who was tearing up in the same way. But my focus is instantly pulled elsewhere by the sight of familiar chocolate brown hair behind her. My breath hitches. I'd recognize that hair anywhere. Her face is obscured by the camera, but when it's finally revealed, everything around us fades. Suddenly, I can't feel the ground beneath me. I can't feel a damn thing, because there she was, like something out of my own dreams, the love of my life walking down the aisle to me.

Belly.

I shake myself out of the daze, glancing down at my feet to ground myself. I loosen my collar, thinking the Italian humidity had gone straight to my head, and I'd lost my goddamn mind. Rolling my shoulders back, I try to pull myself together. It wasn't the first time I'd daydreamed of her like this. But when I dare to look up again, I'm floored to find she's still there, floating down the aisle, as real as ever. And after spending so much time apart, I could fall to my knees right now at the sight of her. Her beauty hits me harder than the island of Capri ever could, and I can't look away. I might as well have been the groom, crying, because at that moment, she was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

Daylight by Taylor Swift plays as Conrad's eyes follow Belly:

I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you

(I can never look away)

I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you

(Things will never be the same)

I've been sleeping so long in a 20-year dark night

(Now I'm wide awake)

And now I see daylight (daylight), I only see daylight (daylight)

She was in her element, shifting side to side, capturing Mia in her perfect moments. There was a golden aura around her—the way her brown hair and sun-kissed skin shimmered beneath the Italian sun in a way that made you stop and stare. Her hair was long, pinned back on the sides except for two curls that framed her face, while the rest cascaded down her back in the most effortlessly beautiful way. She wore a satin dress, tight at the waist, with a high slit that revealed her mile-long legs with every step she took. The color of her dress was almost the same shade as the flowers in the garden surrounding us, similar to the skin of peaches, and it made me smile at the memory of an old moment between us, one that felt like a lifetime ago.

She looked all grown up. Devastatingly beautiful. Radiant. Glowing. Happy. Would all of that change when she saw me? Has she already seen me?

As she got closer, my eyes desperately searched for any sign that she was still the same girl I once knew, the girl who I had adored my whole life. And that's when I saw it, the band-aid on her ankle, and I recognized her again. She was Belly. Different and gorgeous beyond comprehension, yes, but the same in all the ways that mattered. Still, it saddened me to realize that this was a version of Belly I didn't know. This was a complete stranger, standing just a few feet away from me, who I had once known everything about.

The sadness starts to fade when I watch her look up from her camera, smiling as Mia joins Reed at the altar. Tears welled up in her eyes as she looked at the two of them, and it stirred something in my chest I hadn't felt in a long time. Something I wasn't sure I'd ever feel again. She had always had the most tender heart. It was nice to see that hadn't changed. And I knew after everything she had been through, it couldn't be easy for her to be here, to photograph weddings. That's the thing about Belly. She was strong. I didn't have to know every detail of her life over the past few years to know it. She embodied strength. She always had. She was brave. She was kind. She was smart. She was full of life. She was the sun and you couldn't help but bask in her glow when she was around. If only she could see herself the way the world does, the way everything is brighter when she is around, she'd never question her worth again. She wipes away her tears, still smiling, then raises her camera again to capture more of their day.

I watch her for the rest of the ceremony as Reed and Mia recite their vows and exchange rings. It's impossible not to stare. I mean, she was just so beautiful. I almost couldn't believe she was real. Belly has always possessed the kind of beauty that never leaves your mind. The kind of girl you'd pass on the street and think about for the rest of your life. The girl of your dreams. In this case, the girl of mine. The girl who had stolen my heart every summer without knowing it because that's just the kind of person she was. Beautiful without knowing it, without even having to try, and if it was up to me I would never let her forget it. I would never let a day pass without telling her how perfect she was. Tears threaten to blur my vision. She was as beautiful as the day I'd lost her.

I kept waiting for her to glance my way, to feel the weight of my stare and to return it, but she didn't. She's completely absorbed in that camera, the one that keeps blocking the angelic face I somehow had learned to live without for far too long. The only time I take my eyes off of her is when the crowd rises to their feet, cheering and clapping for the newlyweds. Reed dips Mia, sharing their first kiss as a married couple, officially marking the end of the ceremony, and I clap alongside the groomsmen with a smile. I steal one last glance in her direction, and that's when it happens. She finally looks up from her camera, her chocolate eyes meeting mine, and I let out a breath I didn't even know I'd been holding since the moment she stepped down the aisle. She offers a smile that feels more polite than warm, her eyes not quite matching the gesture, but it doesn't matter because that look made me feel more than I'd felt in years. All the memories and feelings tied to those eyes that I'd tried so hard to bury come rushing back, mingled with the painful truth that I'd always hoped would be us someday, starting our own little forever. The realization jolts my heart awake, crashing over me, drowning everything else in its wake.

Oh my god. My chest tightens. I still love her.

Of course I do.