It began with a letter.
A short one. Scrawled hastily, sealed in sake-stained paper, and addressed to the Third Hokage, Sarutobi Hiruzen:
"Old Man,
I'm sending you a kid. He's a Senju—don't ask how.
He's your problem now. Good luck.
–Tsunade"
No name. No warning. Just a boy.
The Third Hokage nearly choked on his pipe.
When he arrived at Konoha's gates, Senju Itomaru had a calm expression, wearing a simple white t-shirt, khaki-colored shorts and flip-flops. He carried nothing but a wooden staff taller than himself, which he claimed was "just for entrance points." The gate guards asked if he was lost. He smiled and replied, "Nope. I'm here to put my face on the wall."
Itomaru was… unique. Calm, confident, and always five steps ahead, or as he likes to say, 'five parallel universes ahead.' He could analyze a jutsu on sight, replicate it moments later, then improve it all the way to S-rank by lunch. He was strong. Too strong. And worse—he knew it.
He didn't just excel in the Academy. He broke it. Within weeks, he'd outperformed every student, instructor, and probably a few statues in the village. Sparring partners became trauma patients. Chunin begged for transfer. Jonin had their entire jutsu gallery stolen in a day.
Despite his unbearable confidence and arrogance, Itomaru wasn't cruel. In fact, he was fiercely protective of those around him—though he treated most like helpless chickens. He teased, mocked, and occasionally forgot normal people couldn't punch through mountains—but deep down, he cared. He just had no idea how to show it properly. He once called himself 'The Big Tree Who Shields The Weak Chicken'.
He liked to teach others... but his teachings often involved deep psychological trauma, mental abuse, and horrors beyond one's comprehension.
He is fixated on Senju Hashirama, often comparing himself to this legendary figure. His greatest pain is not being able to match the First Hokage Jutsu naming prowess.
Occasionally, he refers to people as 'Madara Candidate Number #'.
When assigned to a genin team, he finished their first mission solo by using a barbecue skewer. He was quickly reassigned. Eventually, the Hokage made a new rule: Itomaru would be an "independent operative," available for missions on request… or at random. Whichever happened first.
Every time Itomaru saw one of the Tailed Beasts, he got this look—a sparkle in his eye, the way a child stares at a puppy in a shop window. "Can I keep it?" he'd ask, already trying to name it. Whether it was the One-Tail or the Nine-Tails, Itomaru always thought, "Yeah… this one's going in the backyard."
He even once sneaked away to kidnap the Jinchūriki of the Two Tails... that day a war was averted because his flip-flops broke midway.
But worse than his bijuu collecting dreams was his signature warning. Whenever something annoyed him—whether it was a poor excuse for a mission or a Kage summit dragging on too long—he'd sigh, bring his hands together in a slow, deliberate clap, and say, "...Shall I summon the Buddha?"
Panic. Every time.
Jonin dived for cover. ANBU vanished. Even Hokage flinched.
He never actually did summon anything. But the threat was enough. The rumor that he once shattered a hill with a twig was too much to ignore.
During Orochimaru's Konoha invasion, the First and Second Hokage were summoned via Edo Tensei. When Hashirama looked at Itomaru, he squinted and said, "...Is that chakra signature legal?"
Tobirama replied, "If not, I'm making it illegal right now."
Itomaru first question was, "I've been waiting for you... HASHIRAAAMAAA! Tell me your jutsu naming techniques!"
Hashirama was confused, "Huh?" But just as he was about to answer, Orochimaru took control of him. Legends say that, after that day, every time he created a new Jutsu he would first go after Orochimaru and test it on him.
As war loomed, he didn't waver—he flourished. During Pain's attack on the village, Itomaru arrived late, holding takoyaki and soy sauce. Upon seeing the destruction, he tilted his head and said, "That's it? This guy gets theme music and everything?"
Then he clapped, "Where is my theme music?"
The entire village sang in unison. Pain became a lead singer.
By the time the Fourth Great Ninja War broke out, Itomaru had been visited by Hagoromo Ōtsutsuki—the actual Sage of Six Paths. Not to grant him power (he didn't need it), but to ask him to please stop inventing releases like "Punch Style" and "Smug Chakra Flame Art."
Itomaru responded by offering the Sage a rice cracker. They talked about peace. Itomaru learned Sage Mode anyway.
When Madara asked if he wants to dance too, Itomaru beat him up while singing Bink's Sake.