Author's Note
We finally have a proper bonus chapter! This one is a massive shout out to the Brazilian Megaman comics (Novas Aventuras de Megaman) of all things. I thought it would make for a funny April Fools chapter.
???
On a harbor, everything was going perfectly fine, a bunch of shipping crates lay dormant, and nothing interesting was in sight.
That is, until a pink car came flying out of the water, landing onto the harbor at high speeds before screeching to a halt.
"N-nice Alouette." Z-Diddy complemented, out of his nonexistent breath.
"Yeah!" Alouette cheered.
...
...
"Where are we?"
"I don't know, some kinda harbor..." Z-Diddy responded. "Kinda looks like Sean's stage from 3rd Strike."*
"Oh, the stage where I clipped you with a bottom tier." Alouette teased.
"That didn't happen." Denied the Diddler.
"I still have the clip."
"Well even if it did happen I still won the set." Z-Diddy rebutted. "Your insistence on not taking me seriously led to your L."
"You won because you switched to Chun-Li after the score became 3-0." Alouette responded, calling out the Diddler. "And I still took games off of you! I made it go all the way to 7-10!"
"Whatever, just remember I'm still kicking your ass in Vampire Savior* with a bottom 3 character." Z-Diddy replied, changing the game they were talking about.
...
"We should probably figure out where we are." Z-Diddy stated.
"Yeah, wanna split up?" Alouette offered.
"I think people would raise too many questions if a tiny little baby like you waltzed around."
Alouette pouted at being called that, but silently conceded that he was right.
"Let's go explore! May as well make the most of out this." Z-Diddy said.
City
Walking into the city, the blonde duo found pretty much nothing of note.
"I'm tired." Alouette complained.
"Hmmm, want me to carry you?" Z-Diddy offered.
"Sure."
Z-Diddy crouched down a little and extended his arms out, beckoning the little girl with his hands. Alouette began to run up to him... only for the Diddler to get snatched by a hand extending out of an alleyway.
"Huh?" Alouette exclaimed before fully understanding the situation.
"Hey get back here!"
instead of listening to her, the mysterious assailant ran into the alley way and up to an open door, slamming it shut right before the little girl would enter.
"That's my friend! Give him back!" Alouette yelled out
???, but like a different mysterious location
"Let me go! I was in the middle of a cool bonding moment with that child." Z-Diddy tried to explain.
"Shut it, the show's almost ready." Replied the stranger.
"What show?"
"Fufufufufu you'll see." Ominously laughed the stranger.
Soon, the dragging stopped, and Z-Diddy's captor ran off into the darkness.
...
"I could probably make a run for it right now."
Just as Z-Diddy got up to escape, the lights switched on, revealing that he was on a stage. The furniture on stage implying this was some kind of talk show.
"Huh."
Suddenly, a woman burst onto the stage. With a somewhat tan skin tone, clad in a pink miniskirt and dress with gold accents. Equipped with shoulder pads of the same color, a black choker, even a cape! (That was also pink). Finishing it off with pink and gold boots and a haircut that looked a little bit like a helmet.*
"She's actually quite beautiful. If she didn't kidnap me I'd probably ask her out." Z-Diddy thought to himself.
"Welcome everyone!" Yelled out the woman, facing an empty crowd. "My name is Princess. I'll be your host for today's Talk show! Here's who we're host...ing today..."
Looking over, Princess saw the Diddler doing a cuckoo motion with his hands.
"So... where's the audience at?" Z-Diddy smugly questioned.
"They're right there!"
...
...
"Oooohhh you're breaking the 4th wall." Z-Diddy realized. "Wouldn't make much of a difference, it's not like this fic's audience is huge anyway."
"Whatever, let's begin!"
The two got into their chairs.
"Ok first question: where the hell am I?" Z-Diddy asked. "Second question: what the hell are we doing?"
"I'm the one who's gonna be asking questions right now." Princess asserted. "But to elaborate, currently you're in the studio for my talk show, located in my glorious home country of Brazil. As for you second question, I'll be asking you questions. And you answer them. I'll share details about myself when necessary."
"Damn, well there are worse places where I could've been stuck in." Thought the Diddler.
"Ok, time for the first question. 'What brings you here? Unless you're from here of course."
"I got lost. I don't even know the details, I live on another continent!" Z-Diddy explained.
"Where... exactly are you from?" Princess asked, leaning towards the Diddler.
"I... don't know." Z-Diddy responded. "I live in Neo Arcadia, which isn't a real place.* But the guy who created me is Filipino, and the person writing me is American, so take that as you will."
Princess' face shifted a little after hearing that, but continued as normal.
"Anyway, why did you kidnap me specifically?" Z-Diddy asked.
"No reason, I just needed a guest and you were randomly selected." Princess exclaimed
...
"So, what do you think about Comic books, or Manga?" Princess asked, in a somewhat ominous tone.
"Oh I love manga!"* Z-Diddy innocently responded. "Some Personal favorites of mine are Murcièlago, very bloody, very horny, all peak! I hope it gets an adaptation one day. Uhhh, I like Jojos Bizarre adventure as well, not fully caught up however. Oh there's Chainsaw Man. Actually, let me recommend more "beginner" manga, sorry if I'm patronizing you. Fullmetal Alchemist is a great one, but if you plan on watching the anime make sure you watch 'Brotherhood' specifically as the 2003 version isn't as accurate to the original manga."
"Oh- I got onto a bit of a tangent there." Z-Diddy stated, looking over to the host. "Anyway time to talk about Comic... Princess?"
Princess was glaring daggers at the Diddler, barely able to contain her rage, before calming herself down enough to explain.
"This is the problem." Continued the woman, beginning to shake with rage. "The Brazilian comic industry, for decades has been overshadowed by-"
"Skill issue." Interrupted the Diddler.
"How is it a 'Skill issue'!"
"Just make better comics." Z-Didddy retorted.
"I'm not listening to you, yank." Princess replied, dismissing the Diddler.
"I canonically have no real life nationality." Z-Diddy responded. "Try again."
Princess took a deep breath... stared the Diddler in the eyes... and tried to grab his face, her hand glowing an odd yellow.*
Thankfully, Z-Diddy caught her hand, inspecting the glow as it became brighter and brighter.
"I feel like I shouldn't be staring at this." Thought the Purple Pervert, raising her hand in the air right before it unleashed a beam, flying just past his head.
"You can do that?" Asked the Diddler.
while he was busy redirecting her hand, Princess put her other hand on his stomach, this time unimpeded in blasting the Reploid across the empty studio.
"Damn." Z-Diddy remarked, getting up and healing himself. "I'd make a joke about Ibuki SA2, but I don't think it'll land."*
"I guess I should explain why I really sought you out." Princess said, walking towards the Diddler. "My plan was simple: kill you, kill the stupid girl, find a way back to your 'Neo Arcadia', destroy everything, and replace you as the prota-"
WACK
"You lost me at 'Stupid girl'." Z-Diddy remarked, holding his outstretched arm in place after punching Princess square in the face, knocking her down.
Princess quickly stood back up, gritting her teeth. "Bring it on."
"Sure."
...
...
...
...
The staredown between the two was intense, until Princess immediately flew away, far out of the Diddler's reach.
"Huh, I really should've read her comic of origin." Z-Diddy thought out loud.
"Wouldn't kill you to read something from Brazil huh." Princess sarcastically responded.
"It might." Z-Diddy joked.
Princess threw blasts of energy at the Diddler, destroying more of the studio, and less of Z-Diddy, who was hiding behind the furniture.
"Hey that's Vegeta's move."* Z-Diddy joked. "I'm actually gonna need to wrap this up, I'm really not in the mood to fight her, especially when Alouette is who knows where."
Z-Diddy came out of cover and threw out his shield boomerang at Princess, who nonchalantly dodged out of the way.
"Damn." Z-Diddy flatly exclaimed, staring down another barrage of energy blasts.
Z-Diddy took them all, getting torn to shreds by Princess' power.
"Hm, looks like I won." Princess remarked. "Pretty underwhelming."
"Welp, guess it's time to take o-"
WACK
The shield boomerang from before came back! It hit Princess right in the back, her... armor?* Saving her from being sliced in half.
She shivered from the impact, giving the Diddler the time he needed to regenerate and jump at her.
"How are you still alive!?" Princess yelled, demanding to know.
"That's like, my whole thing." Z-Diddy responded.
Princess was about to fire another energy blast but-
lick
Z-Diddy slid his tongue across Princess' face to distract her. Holding in his laughter as the shock and disgust grew on the woman's face.
"Gotcha."
Princess grabbed on to the Diddler's waist, smiling in anticipation for her finishing move.
"Bye."
BOOOOOOOOOOOM
...
...
...
The dust settled, as princess rose up, her body brused and her clothes in tatters.
"I did it." She said to herself, catching her breath. "I actually did it."
"Did what? Give me a good view?" Z-Diddy's voice echoed.
Princess turned around in disbelief, seeing Z-Diddy completely unharmed sitting in a chair.
"Oh this is great." He added. "You've got a pretty good body. Shame it's so rotten on the inside."
"G-get away from me!"
"That sounds great, point me to the exit." Responded the purple pervert.
Princess scrounged around for a set of keys and threw them at the Diddler.
"Exit's over there, fuck off." She said before running off stage.
"If the exit is over there, why did she run the other way?" Z-Diddy wondered. "I don't wanna spend any more time with that lady, so I'll just move on with it."
City
Z-Diddy finally made it out of the madhouse, looking up at the sun, less than an hour had passed.
"Damn, time really slows down when you're bored." Z-Diddy said.
...
"Oh shit Alouette!" Realized the Diddler before rushing out of the alley.
The girl was nowhere to be found, Z-Diddy began to panic, both out of concern for Alouette, and the fact that Ciel would tear him apart with her bare hands.
"Why didn't she just stay put?"
"Hiiiiiii." A voice echoed.
Alouette came running at him before he could even respond to the sound, jumping into the Diddler's arms. Behind her, a redderheaded woman was trying to keep up with her.
"I missed you!" Alouette shouted. "A whole bunch of stuff happened while you were gone. I met this awesome lady named... uhhh, I forgot how to pronounce it."
"Nástenka" responded the woman.
"Uhhh that." Alouette replied. "We had so much fun all day!"
"Hold on Alouette." Z-Diddy said. "This is why you're the greatest. You just brought me a another hot girl!"
"hm, you flirt." Nástenka flatly responded. "To explain in greater detail, I found this child, hopefully yours, on this street crying all by herself. I asked what was going on and she said she was waiting for you. I didn't want to leave her alone so I sat by her. Eventually we got bored, and it looked weird just sitting there, so we went off doing... well I gave her the choice to do anything she wanted, as long as I approved it of course."
"I wanted to eat at a bunch of places, but she said that robots can't eat." Alouette added. "Uhh we found an arcade, but she kept kicking my butt. It was super fun anyway!"
"Glad you had a good day." Z-Diddy grumbled. "Now Nástenka I have an offer for you."
"No." Nástenka immediately responded. "I have no interest in relationships, currently."
...
"Or casual sex, if that's your angle." She added before the Diddler could get a word in.
"tsk, let's go home Alouette." Z-Diddy dejectedly said, walking back to the harbor.
"Yeah I'm kinda pooped from losing a whole bunch, I don't play SNK games and I paid the price." Alouette responded. "Is this how you feel when I beat you up in 3rd strike.
"I don't have the energy to argue today, you win."
"What happened to you?"
"Long story."
Today's Baddie: Princess?
"Why the hell do I have to talk about this woman more?" Z-Diddy complained. "Because I wanna know more about her." Alouette begged. "Alright sure."
"We'll be ranking their stats from A to E, with S and F being special exceptions, reserved for the best of the best, or the worst of the worst." Z-Diddy added.
Princess
Power: E(A with energy blasts)
(Z: She seems to be a normal human physically, but can fly and shoot lasers. A: She can WHAT!)
Speed: D
(Z: Her speed is hard to define, as we were in a closed space. I don't like her, so I'm just gonna say she's slow)
Intelligence: E
(Z: Doesn't matter how intelligent she is academically, she's insane. A: This stat is a doozy, Ciel told me intelligence can't be assigned a number once. Z: Possibly, but that's not fun.)
Skill: D
(Z: Her moveset included throwing energy blasts at me, and doing that again and again. A: The big explosion she did on you sounds cool.)
Durability: C
(A:You didn't say anything about her durability. Z: well she lived that explosion, even if her clothes didn't, ha.)
Abnormality: S
(Z: Self explanatory, she's fucking nuts.)
Author's note
Oh my god this took forever. It's Z3's anniversary now. Anyway...
*Sean's stage in 3rd strike is in Brazil, that's it. To add more context he's considered to be one of the worst characters in the game, which starts the whole argument between Z-Diddy and Alouette.
*Vampire Savior is Darkstalkers 3 in japan, I've mentioned this before. What's new is Morrigan being bottom 3. Finding Vsav tier lists is hard, but most people consider Morrigan to be one of the lesser characters in the game. Also, Z-Diddy mained her because she was hot, but came to genuinely love her gameplay.
*Describing Princess' appearance was hard. I hate describing things, if it wasn't obvious.
*Neo Arcadia is actually many places under one name, but a part of it is located in modern day Somalia, shown in a Z4 cutscene.
*This scene is just an excuse to talk about manga and anime I like, Murcièlago specifically is a slight influence on this fic, it's not for everyone, but give it a try.
*Oh yeah Princess has superpowers. I actually forgot about that before I made this chapter.
*Ibuki's super art 2 in Street Fighter 3 is a grab, it's very hard to use correctly because you have to be basically kissing your opponent to grab them. There's a version where it doesn't connect properly, and it does like no damage.
*Reference to a YouTube channel called lonely archives, who has a video where every time a Dragon Ball character shoots a bunch of Ki blasts, it's referred to as "Vegeta's technique".
*I still don't know what she's wearing.