Moiraine does her best to play the role of the wife but can't stop thinking about escaping. A plan forms in her mind.
at Adelynn: I'm afraid I don't know when I will post the deleted & extended scenes for Season 3. I'm currently writing chapter 41 for this story, and I'm not even nearly done with the storyline. First, I want to finish writing this story before I start writing the other scenes. I hope you can wait a little bit longer and enjoy some of my other stories while you have to wait for the new scenes. Thank you for reading and your review.
Moiraine stopped trying to make conversation. Her mind was spiraling around the question of who to believe. Should she believe the people of that world or her own mind?
Alanna didn't mind taking over the conversation. She kept talking and never expected an answer. The Cairhien woman didn't know what her friend was actually talking about.
At some point, some servants brought dinner, but Moiraine didn't touch it. She simply lay down, closed her eyes, and tried to blend out Alanna's voice until sleep finally found her.
In the morning, Moiraine woke from sleep – Lanfear hadn't visited her that night – and realized that Lan had exchanged places with Alanna during the night. He sat at the table over some documents, his forehead furrowed. Whatever he was reading, it wasn't good news.
The uncrowned king of Malkier was so focused on the paper that he didn't notice the Cairhien woman had woken up. Curiously, Moiraine used the opportunity to take a good look at the man, comparing him to the Lan she knew.
According to that man, their trip to the Two Rivers happened years ago, and a closer look at his hair confirmed that statement. He still wore it tied back in a knot with the hadori around his head. But there were a lot more grey strands in it than she remembered.
His clothes hadn't changed much. The fabric was better woven – worthy of a king – but otherwise, they looked like those he had worn on the road. No bright colors or embroideries. Nothing that indicated he was a king. He looked just like Lan.
Did that Lan have other scars? Had they been in battles since they came to Fal Dara? Since he was fully clothed, Moiraine couldn't compare his scars with the ones her Lan had.
Something she could see was his muscles. His arms and legs were as strong as before, as were the firm muscles on his chest. He hadn't hesitated to carry her or wavered once he lifted her up. Not when he carried her from the window to the bed or when he approached Mandarb after the memories had knocked her out. No, that version of Lan was just like her own.
You don't have to be the perfect wife. And I'm sure Lan doesn't expect you to pretend you're still the woman he knew. Give it time. Be there for him while you allow him to be there for you. I know you're not much of a talker – well, you both aren't if I think about it – but I always thought you two talked to each other. So, talk to him. Ask him about your life as a married couple. Show him you're interested in getting to know him.
Alanna's words rang in the Cairhien woman's ears. She had begged her to act normal. Be there for Lan. Be his wife. Show him you're interested. Try to get to know him. Well, now was as good as any time to try her best.
Slowly, Moiraine sat up and rearranged the blanket before clearing her head. She would try pretending to talk to the real Lan. How hard could that be?
The furrow hadn't left his forehead during her examination. What was he reading?
"Bad news?"
Startled, the Malkieri turned his head around, and his eyes widened in surprise. When he saw the Aes Sedai sitting in bed, he dropped the documents, jumped to his feet, and rushed to the bed. "You're awake."
Moiraine smiled. "I am."
"I can't believe I didn't notice." Anger rolled through the bond, but Moiraine knew it wasn't aimed at her. No, the foolish man was angry with himself for not feeling her. Gently, the Malkieri took her hand between his own. "How do you feel?"
"The headache is gone, but you already knew that." The Cairhien woman touched his forehead with her free fingers, smoothing the furrow. "Something is bothering you."
A dry laugh escaped Lan's lips, then he pressed a kiss on her wrist. "It's nothing. Don't worry about me. We focus on you and your recovery."
Show him you're interested in getting to know him.
Moiraine smiled. "Tell me. What worries you?"
"Except for finding a cure for my wife?"
The Cairhien woman cupped his cheek with one hand. "You weren't worrying about… me when you looked at those documents." It was hard to call herself his wife, but she made it with only a slight hesitation. Did Lan notice?
"I wasn't," Lan admitted. "At least not entirely. It's impossible for me not to think about you. You're always on my mind."
That insufferable man was trying really hard to distract her from his problems. Well, Moiraine wouldn't give up so easily. She had to convince him she was doing fine, or he wouldn't stop watching her every move. "Tell me. It helps to share the burden with someone else."
A sad smile appeared on Lan's lips, then he pressed another kiss on her wrist. He was buying himself time. Had Moiraine been wrong? Did they not share their thoughts in that world? Or was that version of her not involved in Lan's plans? Was she pushing him too far?
"You're right." Surprised, Moiraine raised her eyebrows. She hadn't expected that. "I got word about our men who are fighting against the Blight. There was another attack from the Shadowspawn. Many of our men died. We've already lost so many men to the Dark One's army… sometimes, I wonder if it's a lost cause. Maybe I should forget Malkier."
Despair filled the bond, but it was Lan's bitterness that broke Moiraine's heart. The Warder wanted to save his home so badly but without the Dragon… "What can we do to help?"
The uncrowned king of Malkier snorted. "A group of Aes Sedai would be helpful. Sadly, the Amyrlin refuses to send sisters."
"The White Tower didn't…." Shocked, the Aes Sedai looked at the Malkieri with big eyes. How could Siuan refuse to send sisters? Men were dying. Men who fought against the Shadowspawn. When Lan quickly lowered his gaze, Moiraine understood. "Siuan doesn't send sisters because of me. She wouldn't help a woman she thinks of as a Darkfriend."
"This is not your fault. The Amyrlin is simply… stubborn."
"She wouldn't hesitate if I weren't involved. How can this not be my fault?"
Lan shook his head. "I shouldn't have brought it up. Let us focus on you getting better." Smiling, the uncrowned king of Malkier asked, "What do you want to do today?"
Be there for him while you allow him to be there for you.
Was that the moment when Moiraine allowed Lan to be there for her? How would he react? Would he go with her, or would he forbid her to leave?
"I want to pay the tree another visit."
Immediately, Lan's smile turned into anger. "No," he responded coldly.
"I have to go back. I need to know what happened."
"You got attacked. Alanna admitted she can't heal that cut, and memories won't heal it either. That tree is doing nothing but bringing you pain."
"I still don't remember everything from that attack."
"And you don't have to. Important is that you're alive and well, and we ensure that you rest and take it slowly until you regain your strength."
Angrily, Moiraine glared at him. "I want to see that tree."
"You won't leave the house."
"So, I'm a prisoner now?!"
"You're not a prisoner, Moiraine." Frustrated, Lan rubbed a hand over his face. His exhaustion was palpable through the bond. "Light, I'm trying to protect you."
"Protect me from what, Lan? From a tree?" The Aes Sedai couldn't keep the sarcasm out of her voice. "I mean, who hasn't heard about those terrible monsters, looking so innocent in their stillness, but when you turn your back on them, they will catch you with their roots and swallow you before you have time to run."
"Moiraine," Lan growled warningly. They glared at each other, then the Malkieri jumped to his feet, starting to run up and down. "The last time you went there, you collapsed. Who knows what will happen when you go there again?"
"We will never know if we don't go there."
"I'm not willing to take that risk. Haven't you gotten hurt enough over the last few days?"
The woman of the Blue Ajah gnashed her teeth. So much for 'Be there for him and allow him to be there for you'. Lan wouldn't help her. He wanted his wife and not Moiraine's mysterious way out of that world. No, she had to get rid of him, finding an assignment that would keep him busy. She couldn't go to that tree if he watched her every step.
Moiraine took a deep breath, putting on her calm Aes Sedai mask. If Lan didn't want to help her, she saw no reason to continue their argument.
Of course, Lan saw it, too, and returned to the bed. "Please. I can't lose you, Moiraine." He tried reaching for her face, but the Cairhien woman turned her head away. She didn't want to be touched.
Lan sighed but didn't try to touch her. "I understand. In that case, I will leave you alone. If you need anything, feel free to tell the guards before your door. They will arrange everything."
Moiraine fought hard not to snap at him. No matter what Lan said, she was a prisoner. Silently, she watched him from the corner of her eye, picking up his documents before he left the room, glancing at her one last time. He didn't try talking to her again. His Moiraine also must have shown him the cold shoulder occasionally.
Once the uncrowned king of Malkier had left the room, the Cairhien woman threw back the blanket and started preparing. She needed a plan for how to get rid of the guards. She needed to go home!
Moiraine's thoughts were spiraling while a maid helped her to get cleaned and dressed. She could use Saidar to knock out the guards, but Lan probably warned Alanna to watch out if someone used the One Power. They would appear at the stable, stopping Moiraine before she even had a chance to escape. No, she had to be smarter.
She sent the girl out once she was done, ordering tea and breakfast. Of course, she wasn't really hungry, but she had to act like she wasn't planning anything if she didn't want to alert Lan.
Her eyes found a small package that Bianca – the Healer – had left for her. The woman had wanted Moiraine to sleep, so she left her goatstongue to help her with that.
Goatstongue. Wasn't that the herb Nynaeve had used to help Stepin after Kerene's death? And she used it in Falme to help those who had been in pain. Maybe it could be of use to me.
Smiling, the Aes Sedai weighed the package in her hands. An idea was forming in her head. She had no idea how much of the herb was needed to make someone sleepy, but it should be helpful.
A knock at the door pulled her out of her thoughts, and she hid the package behind her back. "Yes?"
A servant entered, carrying a tray with a pot of tea and a plate with buttered bread and fruits. The smell of the warm bread filled the room and made Moiraine's stomach growl. Maybe she was a little hungry.
"Your breakfast, my Lady."
"Put it on the table, and pour me a cup of tea, please."
The man bowed, then went to said table. Moiraine followed him slowly, then graciously placed her body in the chair Lan had used before. She would have to be quick if she wanted to succeed.
Once the servant was done, he bowed again. "If my Lady needs anything else, please let us know."
"Actually," Moiraine said, and the man stopped in surprise. "Could you tell the guards I want to see them?"
"The guards, my Lady? They can't leave the door. Our Lord assigned them to-"
"I don't want them to leave. I want them inside." Confused, the man furrowed his forehead. He didn't understand what Moiraine wanted from the guards. The woman of the Blue Ajah raised a questioning eyebrow. "Is there a problem?"
"No, my Lady. Of course not." Quickly, the servant bowed, then rushed to the door.
Moiraine didn't waste much time. She lifted the lid of the teapot, then inserted three pinches of the herb. Hopefully, it wasn't too much. She had never drunk goatstongue before, so she had no idea if someone could taste it in the tea.
Nynaeve would have noticed. Light, I should've paid more attention to her when she prepared it at the infirmary.
Quickly, she put the lid back where it belonged and hid the package in a small pocket of her dress. In the next moment, the two guards entered and bowed.
"My Lady."
Moiraine couldn't offer them to join her for breakfast. Guards didn't eat with their lords and ladies. It would look suspicious if they joined her. First, she had to distract them.
"I was hoping you could help me in filling in some blanks. As you may have heard, I miss several years of my memory. My husband is busy, so I thought you could fill me in while I eat my breakfast."
"What do you wish to know, my Lady?" The man on the left looked like he wasn't comfortable with the situation, but the guard on the right seemed eager to help.
Moiraine smiled at him sweetly. "Everything. Everything you know."
Listening to the guards was more exhausting than the Aes Sedai would've thought. They took turns – after the man on the left had warmed up to Moiraine's plea – and they knew a lot. Apparently, Lan had been quite busy in that world, and his wife supported him in every way possible.
Soon, her plate was empty, and the men were not even close to coming to an end.
"The Trollocs are incredibly stupid. Although they are killed, every time they try to attack Fal Dara, they return over and over again."
"Our Lord is always upfront. No Trolloc passes his attention or escapes his sword. Or you, my Lady. Watching you two fighting against the Shadowspawn is always a great pleasure. You complete each other so well. I mean…." The man lowered his gaze to the floor. His ears shimmered red, and he coughed to clear his voice. "Of course, you know how well you work together."
His cough was Moiraine's chance to continue with her plan. "Dear light. I let you talk and talk without allowing you to drink. May I offer you a cup of tea?"
As expected, the guards declined politely. Moiraine wanted to snap at them but kept her calm. It would get her nowhere if she lost her temper now. "I insist. If you do me the honor to help by telling me about the past few years, the least I can do is offer something to drink." Her eyes fell on the fireplace. Luckily, they kept a pot for tea and some extra cups in that room. Moiraine assumed the other Moiraine liked to drink some tea before bed. "Could you get me two more cups?"
The guard on the left grimaced at her question, but the one on the right finally moved to the fireplace. It seemed like he didn't want to anger his lady.
Once he brought the cups, Moiraine filled them with the tea, though the man protested he could do it. It wasn't hot anymore, but she couldn't use Saidar to heat it – at least not if she didn't want Lan on her heels.
"Here."
She handed the guards their cups, who hurried to take them. They mumbled their appreciation while keeping their eyes locked on the floor, then took a sip. Moiraine noticed she held her breath when they both didn't swallow. Had it been too much goatstongue? Could they taste the herb? Blood and ashes! She needed them to swallow all of it! Maybe she could distract them.
"I hope the tea is not too strong for you?" She did her best to sound as innocent as possible. "If you don't like it, I can order you-"
"It's fine." Both men quickly emptied their cups when the Cairhien woman stepped closer to take them out of their hands. Surprised, Moiraine raised an eyebrow. It looked like she had hit a nerve with her question.
But emptying the cup wasn't enough for the guards. The one on the right held out his empty cup and asked, "Could I have another?"
Moiraine smiled when the other one demanded another cup as well. That went better than she had imagined. "Absolutely."
After drinking two cups of tea, it all went down quickly. The two guards had continued their report but started to slur after a few minutes. Calmly, the woman of the Blue Ajah watched how they rubbed their eyes and began to sway. When the first of them almost fell, she got up and helped him to lie down on the floor, where he closed his eyes and started to snore. The other guard was too sleepy to notice his friend was already down but followed him quickly.
One problem down.
Moiraine didn't waste time. She couldn't say how long Lan would be occupied with his documents. As quick as possible, she undressed, then slipped into her riding outfit. Who knew what else Lan had prepared to keep her from leaving?
The Aes Sedai left the guards in her room. Someone would wonder why they didn't stand guard before her door, but hopefully, she would be long gone by then. The most important thing was that she didn't allow her emotions to show through the bond. Lan couldn't know about her escape.