Part 4

"Something is bothering you," Dave said, as the two walked along holding hands. "I can tell. Why don't you tell me what the problem is?"

"Not worried really," JJ denied.

"So?" Dave asked quietly, as he opened the car door for his mate.

JJ waited for Dave to climb into the driver's seat and shut the door before she began speaking.

Dave listened patiently and wondered if traces of Jennifer's incarnations existed somewhere in her subconscious. He's supposed it was possible, though those that were reincarnated usually didn't remember that they were for the most part. There had been instances however, when their memories had returned usually because of some tragedy and it brought up a memory of something similar that had happened in a previous life or because they had unfinished business.

"I know it seems rather far-fetched, but I have no other explanation as to why I am having dreams about two women who look similar to myself and also about a man that could be your twin," JJ finished.

"It's not as far-fetched as you think JJ," Dave said, as he placed a gentle hand on her wrist.

"It's not?" JJ asked, as she looked at Dave to see his gentle but intense expression, an expression that sent a hot streak of longing through her. She barely stopped herself from leaning over to devour his mouth and stripping him naked right here in the car that was parked on a public street.

"Most people don't believe in reincarnation and I'm well aware of it. That doesn't mean however, that it doesn't exist, especially for those that have some sort of unfinished business. They could have died tragically for example, leaving the person they loved behind before they got very much time together, they could've been pregnant at the time, and died doing childbirth. They could have died without telling the most important person in the world to them that they love them, whether that's a potential mate or a child. Really, they're hundreds of reasons that somebody wants to come back in another life. However, most of those that are reincarnated don't remember that they are at least not at first. A lot of people have unfinished business when they die suddenly whatever the reason for it may be."

"So those women..." JJ started to say then paused.

"Were as you suspected your previous incarnations. You might've been reincarnated more than twice, but since I never met them I believe that's why you can't remember them, even the little bit you have of your two previous selves is astonishing enough. I might have met one of your incarnations for instance while I was wandering around in shock, but I promise you, I wouldn't have noticed at that time, as I was simply to out of my head for many years," Dave explained.

"So, it's obvious that you never had a life with either of them or I wouldn't've been shown pieces of their lives right?" JJ asked relaxing now that she knew Dave believed in reincarnation. Something that shouldn't have surprised her as much as it did considering his true age.

"Probably," Dave said. "I can't say with certainty that you would have because it's different for everyone, but I admit it's a likely possibility."

"So, what happened? Why weren't we together?" JJ asked

"Times were different back when those two women were born," Dave explained quietly. "In the first incarnation that I met your name was Mary and you'd already married by the time we met very briefly on the street. You were already pregnant with your first children. You seemed happy or at least content. Unfortunately, you died in childbirth which was very common at that time. You're twin girls survived though and had a relatively happy childhood. I kept an eye or them just to make sure they were okay. Their father was a kind man and adored his wife, though he married again not long after Mary's death."

"He probably needed someone to help look after his children, as there wouldn't have been any formula that he could have bought back then," JJ guessed Dave nodded in agreement.

"Men didn't know a thing about looking after infants or young children in that time and unfortunately, the girls grandmothers on both sides had already passed away by the time they were born. A lot of people died relatively young back then. Some though, managed to survive to 50, though a lot of them died by the time they were 35 or 40.

"And my second incarnation?" JJ asked fascinated.

"That story is even worse than what happened to Mary," Dave admitted. "While Mary's story is tragic, it wasn't uncommon to die in childbirth back in those days, especially if you were carrying more than one, as medical technology was minimal. I can't really blame the husband for marrying again so soon, as he really had to if he wanted his daughters to survive. They didn't have things like wet nurses back then or formula like you have already realized. I believe the new wife fed the girls goats milk so they wouldn't starve. As for Lydia's story I met her when she was just 20 and her father had already arranged a marriage for her with the son of a business associate. That was quite common in those days, as girls had absolutely no rights. Now, some fathers would actually ask their daughters who they wanted to marry and if they felt they were suitable then arrangements would be made, but Lydia's father was anything but kind or compassionate. He had no care for his daughter's feelings and threatened her until she agreed. She likely would've died under her father's cruel hand much sooner than she did if she hadn't agreed to the marriage, but in that case, I think that would have been a mercy. From what I knew Lydia's father had quite the temper and he had no problem taking it out on his children. Now if she had been a man she could've gotten away from home and perhaps gone into the military or just traveled from one city to another as a man of trade. Boys had more options back so long ago then girls no matter how smart or intelligent they were. Girls no matter what kind of family they came from were often treated as chattel, though not always."

"So, let me guess where this is going," JJ said quietly. "I can see it now the man that's been arranged to marry her is just as upset with the situation as Lydia was, maybe even more, so he takes out his anger and frustration on her. Also, he probably has a low opinion of women in general, because that likely was the way he was raised, so has no trouble treating them as if they have no intelligence of their own. She was probably treated as a bearer of his children and a housekeeper and that's it."

"That's pretty accurate," Dave said admiringly making JJ preen a little at Dave's tone.

"So I bet you he probably beat her on a regular basis and she probably eventually died from one of those beatings."

"Essentially correct," Dave said. "The only thing you got wrong was she was pregnant at the time so she miscarried the babies and basically bled to death from hemorrhaging. She might have survived if she hadn't been pregnant, though personally I think her dying was better as it saved her more years of pain and misery. I so wanted to interfere, especially in Lydia's case, but I knew that would just get me noticed and perhaps killed, though not permanently of course. If I had suddenly woke up and dug my way out of the ground I would've been declared a demon. That would've been worse trust me."

"That is so sad," JJ shuddered, "especially in Lydia's case. While Mary's story is sad, as you said death in childbirth happened all the time back then so it was natural. Lydia's on the other hand...

"Was anything but natural," Dave agreed. "Even then our species tended to live longer than the humans, which made a lot of them jealous and often caused conflicts, because humans wanted our longevity. Now, while we still live longer then humans, they live way longer than they used too.

"So, did Lydia have any children before she miscarried?"

"Oh, yeah, several as she and her husband were married for something like 10 years. She had several sets of twins and came out of it each time okay because there was a midwife in the village that they lived that was a great help. Everybody knew that Jonathan Caine was something of a bastard, but there was nothing anybody could do about it, because what went on behind closed doors was private and because women had few rights back then. A husband was allowed to beat their wife legally as much as they wanted or even force them into having sex, which wouldn't have been considered rape back then."

"So, what happened to the children?" JJ asked.

"Luckily, Lydia had plenty of relatives and they certainly told her father what they thought of him when they learned that Lydia had basically been beaten to death. It was the father, after all, who had arranged a marriage with one of his business associate sons, who took out his anger and frustration on someone who had just as many feelings as he did and certainly no choice in the matter of her marriage to him. The father didn't live long after Lydia's death," Dave added carefully.

"You exacted revenge," JJ guessed quite accurately. She knew how Alphas thought and while Dave's situation was probably unique that wouldn't have changed his reaction.

"Yes, and not only on the father, but also on the husband," Dave admitted, relieved that JJ was taking what he had done so well. He didn't look ashamed of his actions so long ago, nor should he be. "What happened to Lydia is one reason that most of our kind don't arrange marriages for their children anymore, though some still do, mostly humans. Arranging marriages for children, in particular the girls, just leads to misery most of the time or at best indifference. At best the marriage is unhappy and at worst the wife is beaten on a regular basis. There was no dating or courting back so long ago, not in the higher class anyway. A suitable wife or husband was just picked out for you and a lot of times the match was a poor one."

"It probably didn't help that the wife wasn't allowed to work and she was stuck at home just looking after the children," JJ suggested. "I'm sure the marriages would've been better if the wives were allowed to work outside the home. Not just look after the children, go to market, mend and wash clothes and so forth."

"I agree with you there," Dave said. "Having satisfying work to do would've made those women happier including Lydia I'm sure."

"Well, if she was anything like me, which should be the case if she's my incarnation, then I like having satisfying work to do. I know the children will come eventually, but I hope to find another job, one I like better than my previous one. It's not necessarily about the money either," JJ added.

"I know that," Dave said calmly, as he kissed her cheek. "I had a housekeeper that came to my old apartment and now comes the he house a couple of days a week to do the laundry and so forth, so that you don't have to worry about it and neither did I before we met. Who wants to waste their time washing clothes? Really, that's all you would end up doing once the children come along, depending on how many we have. I might need to change the arrangements with Nina and have her live with us once we have children to look after."

"I don't think you need to worry about that quite yet since as far as I'm aware I'm not even pregnant yet," JJ said.

"Well, if you aren't soon it won't be for lack of trying," Dave grinned devilishly.

"Are you sure that an immortal can get someone's who's not pregnant in the first place?" JJ asked.

"You know, I don't know," Dave admitted thoughtfully after moment, realizing JJ had made a good point. That thought had never occurred to him. "It's not like I went around testing whether or not I could get a woman pregnant. I know our species is compatible with humans, but that's normal mortals, not immortals. On the other hand, you are my mate and so were Mary and Lydia, simply because they carried your soul. I believe you are the reincarnation of my dead wife, the one I had when I was mortal."

"But you also weren't immortal when you mated and had your children," JJ said and Dave nodded.

"Still, the connection is there as you are aware. I can't imagine it being any different than it was back so many centuries ago now," Dave said.

"Well, we'll just have to see," JJ decided. "I stopped taking my pills to prevent me from conceiving, so if I'm not pregnant within the next few weeks..."

"Then either my immortality is preventing you from conceiving..." Dave said

"Or there might be something wrong with me, though my doctor said I was healthy when I went in for my check up," JJ said.

"We can always adopt," Dave said, though that was a certain tone in his voice that told JJ that he really wanted children of his blood and she couldn't blame him, as she wanted the same with the man she loved.

"Well, we don't know that I won't be able to conceive," JJ said. "Let's not worry about it for a few months anyway. If I don't conceive in a year or so then perhaps we need to worry."

"I would say give it at least two or three, as some women just don't conceive within a year of marriage," Dave said.

"Our kind usually conceive so easily though," JJ said.

"Usually is not always," Dave reminded gently and JJ nodded. "Just because it is the usual thing to conceive within a few months of the mating doesn't mean that it hasn't taken longer for some of our kind to get pregnant. Putting pressure on yourself is not going to help the situation and it could prevent you from conceiving."

"Alright, you are correct," JJ admitted. "So, when do you want to try turning me immortal?"

"As soon as possible," Dave said. "The only thing I'm worried about is if I give you my blood and our theory isn't, right then you could get very sick and perhaps even die. I definitely don't want that to happen now that you have agreed to be mine. It nearly killed me when Mary died, but especially when Lydia did. I'm not sure I could go through that kind of pain again and not go insane from grief."

"Probably because of the way that Lydia died," JJ summarized logically. "While Mary was young when she died at least it was from a natural cause. Lydia on the other hand was beaten to death by a violent man and that is definitely not natural."

"You're right," Dave said his expression melancholy. "While I mourned Mary's death, I was enraged at Lydia's, so both her father and her husband paid the price for their stupidity, their arrogance and their uncaring attitudes. The authorities never figured out who did it. I wished so much that I could have saved Lydia from her fate."

"Which is only natural since we are mates and they were me or at least they had my soul," JJ said.

"What made it worse was I had to watch from a distance at the way he treated her and I could do nothing. It was over 10 years of torment. I'm actually surprised she didn't decide to take her life," Dave said.

"She probably decided to stick it out for her children. You said she had several children."

"Yeah, she did, and I can see her sticking it out for that reason," Dave agreed. "If your theory is right then she probably got pregnant that last time on accident. Even back then there were ways to prevent getting pregnant. I'm sure she would've found one of them and used it. She would've kept it from her husband who probably only would've beaten her more than he did if he knew. He was just a big brute of a man who enjoyed beating on his wife. I could tell. I've never understood how a father who is supposed to love his children could put his daughter in such a situation."

"I'm sure you know that some parents don't really love their children," JJ suggested gently. Her Dave was such a compassionate, gentle man and she knew that he would love whatever children they happened to have, even those that were adopted. While he understood intellectually that some fathers just didn't love their children, his heart didn't really understand. His heart was just too big, kind and compassionate to understand how a father could do such a cruel, callous thing to his daughters.

"Yeah, I know," Dave said quietly. "If we ever have children I will never do that to any of them, not only because it's basically out of fashion to arrange marriages, but because I could never stand seeing any of my children unhappy. They'll be allowed to marry who they want so long as we both approve and even if we don't is not like we can stop them, as this isn't centuries ago where women had no rights."

"Well, hopefully, they'll all grow up and fall in love with good people," JJ said. "You're right, we can't stop them by threatening to cut them off, because women are allowed to work nowadays, so they will be able to support themselves quite well."

"Well, that's for the future, as you aren't even pregnant yet," Dave said finally. "As you pointed out there's no guarantees you can even get pregnant by me since I'm immortal and you're not."

"I hope I can," JJ said with longing in her voice.

"That's a hope we both share," Dave said. Finally, Dave started the car and headed for home.

~~~Dave and JJ~~~