EXCHANGE
"Class, in light of Mineta's permanent dirt nap, we will be receiving an exchange student from the illustrious and - nope, you can't pay me enough to say this."
Wads of cash fell on Aizawa. With a heavy sigh, the teacher said, "The Illustrious and Magnificent Academy of Monte Cristo, who has deigned grace us with the presence of their vaunted Count."
A limousine rammed through the wall. A butler swept up the rubble and opened the door. Sunbeams shone down and birds sang as a mysterious figure, fur cloak billowing in the breeze, light gleaming off a chiseled chin, eyes like carved emeralds, skin fair and smooth as marble, like life breathed into a Greek statue and it found its creators lacking, stepped forth.
He then immediately tripped over his cartoonishly long legs, rolled uncontrollably forward, and tottered back onto his feet. He set a huge wad of cash atop the money pile Aizawa sat in.
"For the damages, my good man."
"You could have used the front door."
"Indeed I could have, but it would have been a waste of a perfectly good door. That wall could use replacing, wouldn't you say?"
"Just introduce yourself and get in your seat."
"Why, most certainly!"
The Count wobbled to face the class. "I shan't deign impart upon you my name. Names have power, and I allow no man power over myself. As a manner of address, you may address me as Your Eminence, or Your Radiance. Your Grace, acceptable if haste must take precedence over propriety."
"Or we could just call you Count," Ojiro said.
The Count waved a hand. "What cares the sun for the meager workings of an ant? But oh, before I forget, I have brought gifts to herald my arrival at this modest institution."
Butlers ran forward, carrying boxes. The Count offered the first to Momo.
"The finest energy bars. High fat, high protein, tailored specifically for maximum efficiency for your Quirk."
Momo gawked as she beheld the bars. "Even my family doesn't like buying those too often."
Tsuyu unwrapped hers next, revealing a jar of bath salts.
"Tailored for your delicate amphibious skin. I've heard it's supposed to be as decadent as bathing in warm caramel."
"I'll have to see for myself, gero."
Jirou got noise cancelling headphones, Mina a luxurious skin cleanser, Hagakure a mirror that showed her reflection despite her invisibility, and Ochako got anti-nausea medication from the world's greatest pharmacist.
"Hey, what about us?" Kaminari groused. "You only got the girls stuff."
The Count clapped his hands. The butlers handed them each a stack of cash.
"Objection withdrawn."
"Are you quite done interrupting the class?" Aizawa asked menacingly.
The Count smiled and presented him with a bag of extra-strength coffee. Aizawa tucked it into his sleeping bag. "Take as much time as you need."
"I am quite done, my good man. You may commence the lecture."
As he sat down, the Count quietly rubbed his hands and chuckled evilly.
496
And so the overly convoluted revenge plot begins.