Happy new year!
New chapter featuring special guest appearance by Adrian by Fellow-queer-birdguy over on Tumblr
And Maya by leilaniethefirst over on Tumblr
"The Green Rebellion has replied at last." Red Leader's words echoed throughout the chamber of the Great Hall. Matt and the other soldiers in the base had gathered around for the daily morning gathering when Red Leader decided to announce their current status in the war against their newest opponent, the Green Rebellion.
Listening tentatively, Matt was on the edge of his seat to learn what became of their plan.
"They agreed to our terms and we shall meet them in the South, three days from now." Red Leader continued with the announcement. He received the private broadcast last night and immediately gathered his Generals to discuss their next course of action. He sighed. "I will personally go and meet with the Green Leader at the border of the Iberian peninsula to discuss the war matter. Some of you might be chosen to accompany me on this mission, but I want to make it clear to you now it's only for precaution. No doubt the Green Rebellion will bring their own forces, but there won't be a fight if we can help it. We don't know who we are dealing with yet." He paused, letting his words sink in as he gauged the reaction of his fellow comrades.
They were shocked and anxious no doubt, already concerned about the outcome of this fateful meeting. How can we ever trust the Green Rebellion not to ambush us? They will kill Red Leader the moment he leaves the safety of the base! This meeting is pointless - it will never work! Tord could hear their thoughts already; so similar to the words his Generals cried out when he first informed them of his plan.
Even with their support, Tord kept his gaze fixed on the audience and avoided looking at the front of the stage where the Generals watched him like vultures.
"This is the perfect opportunity for us to get to know our enemy. Observe them carefully! Watch how they behave towards you and their own allies, learn everything you can from them. If nothing is accomplished in the meeting and we are to meet them in battle after all, you'll need all your wits for the fight to come."
Hopefully it won't come to that. Tord added privately.
He knew the old Edd from his past would never harm him unless it was for the last piece of bacon, but it's been seven years since they last saw each other and things ended pretty badly between them. Who knows how much he's changed over the years!
A part of Tord sincerely hoped Edd did change. That his betrayal on some level was enough to show Edd the error of ways; for foolishly thinking that things had to remain static and on his terms forever, living a fantasy for the rest of their lives, and never allowing his friends the change and catharsis they needed.
All around the auditorium, Tord saw the soldiers nodding along in agreement.
"Until we leave for the meeting, I expect all of you to keep up with your training as usual. Nothing has changed." Red Leader finished. "You are dismissed." He raised one robotic finger and made a circling motion with it. Without another word, he turned and exited the stage.
Following the flow of the crowd, Matt made his way outside the Great Hall secretly fizzing with excitement. His idea had worked! Edd took the bait and now the war is one step closer to ending. I need to find Tom and tell him the great news right away!
As he snuck away from the others, Matt noticed a look of awe had started to set in the soldiers' eyes at the mention of meeting with the Green Rebellion. Now they hurriedly gathered around in small coalitions, murmuring in hushed voices full of excitement and dread.
"What do you all think?" One of the scientists, a man with short wavy brown hair, green eyes and glasses with the name tag written 'Adrian', asked his comrades anxiously. "Our Leader must be losing his marbles if he is this willing to trust the Rebellion after everything they have done to us."
"I don't know, I think he is going about this the right way." Said a woman with freckled dark skin, afro styled hair, and brown eyes by the name of Maya. "Honestly I would be more concerned if Red Leader let frustration get the better of him and just jumped straight into battle. I think it's very commendable of him to try a different approach for once."
Matt let their voices fade away into the background as he hurried off to look for Tom. Although part of him wanted to reassure the soldiers they had nothing to fear - that the Rebellion wants to make peace with them just as much as they do - he knew it wouldn't be wise to give away his previous involvement with them. They might never trust him again as their nurse if he did.
Stepping out into the main hallway, Matt was delighted to find Tom up and about for once. Usually he just stays cooped up in Tord's room writing all day. He looked so nervous and out of place among the rest of the Red Army soldiers, who passed by shooting intrigued glances his way. Matt still couldn't believe his friend was really back from the dead and into his life once again. He felt both blessed and grateful to be in Tom's presence.
"Hey!" Matt smiled as he approached him.
Tom shifted his feet. His neon green eyes shone like emeralds. "Hey." He smiled back softly. "How… was the meeting?"
"Edd responded!" Matt lowered his voice to an intense whisper, barely keeping the excitement out of his voice. "He agreed to meet up with Tord in three days. Our plan is working!"
Tom nodded. "Ah. Good."
His lack of a reaction caught Matt off guard. He knew Tom wasn't the most emotional person out there, but surely he must be pleased by the news? He leaned forward, searching Tom's eyes. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing, I-" Tom crossed his arms with a sigh. "I'm just nervous. I really want this to work."
"It will!"
Tom shrugged. "Never mind. Do you wanna hang out or something?" He asked, avoiding Matt's eyes.
"Sure! What do you have in mind?" Matt latched on to his arm as they began to walk through the hallways together.
Tom was taken aback. "I, uh, I don't know? I heard some soldiers in the Carnelian Wing would be offering to do makeup and hair to anyone who's interested. We could go check it out?"
Matt frowned. He was well aware it's been seven years since they last properly interacted and that many things could've changed since, but Tom didn't seem like the type to be interested in makeup. Matt used to be obsessed with it, but since gaining his memories back Matt found himself losing interest in the matter in favor of pursuing medicine. But hey, if this is something that Tom enjoys, who is he to judge?
"Sure thing!" Matt nudged Tom affectionately. "How was your morning?"
Tom shrugged. "It's been fine. Uneventful, I guess." He mumbled awkwardly. "I wrote a little."
Matt perked up. "What are you writing about?"
"Uh… it's just a simple romance/science-fiction story."
"Can I read it?" Matt asked, huge eyed with glee.
"Not yet." Tom chuckled, ruffling his friend's hair. "It's nowhere close to being finished. Other than writing… nothing worth mentioning."
"Are you still avoiding Tord?"
Matt's blunt question took Tom by surprise. "No! I- I- I am just, you know… busy with my writing is all. It doesn't mean anything!" He laughed, hoping he could play it cool and hide his nervousness. But Matt kept staring at him with sympathy in his mismatched eyes and Tom deflated. "Is it really that obvious?"
"Kinda."
Tom sighed. "It's complicated. You wouldn't understand. Anyways, how is nurse training going?"
Matt didn't miss the obvious change in subject, but didn't bother pointing it out. "It's coming along great! I am loving learning how to care for patients." He didn't dare mention his most embarrassing mishap with the Reagan lookalike.
"Even if it's gross at times?"
"I am not that squeamish." Matt shrugged. "I don't do a whole lot around the Infirmary yet, but Yanov is gradually giving me harder tasks. I hope I'll get to actually help treat patients soon enough."
Tom scratched the back of his head. "Aren't you nervous though? Treating patients is a really big deal. You have to pay a lot of attention, Matt-"
"I do pay attention! What do you think I do when I'm training?"
"You can't just goof around, applying makeup, and admiring your reflection whenever you want when there are people's lives on the line." Tom went on as though he were uninterrupted. "This is all serious stuff."
His dismissive words caused a pang of hurt within Matt so strongly he wanted to rip himself away from Tom. He wanted to yell and fight, cause a scene, prove to him and anyone in the vicinity that he was not the soft, innocent, and gullible man everyone believed him to be anymore.
"Of course." Instead Matt held his outburst in check and gave Tom a strained smile. "I can only hope Yanov's training will be enough to shape me up for the job. I only want to help… the last thing I want is to cause more problems around me."
Tom fixed him with a sympathetic glance. "I understand. You want to prove your worth. I just think this method is a little risky and too ambitious for you, is all." He commented. "I'm sure you could have proven yourself in some other way that didn't require so much out of you."
God, Tom, you really need to shut up right now! Matt wanted to roll his eyes but he didn't want to be rude to the friend who came back into his life after faking his own death. It would seem ungrateful. And yet, Tom was really grinding his gears.
If this were anybody else Matt wouldn't have hesitated to at least stand up for himself by now.
"What's more important than devoting my life to healing and comforting others?" Matt dared test the waters and retort back a little. "What else would you have suggested for me? It was either this or the frontlines, and I think you can probably guess how well that would have gone."
Tom reared back in surprise. Was that bitterness he heard in Matt's voice? No, it can't be. Matt was literally incapable of being mad. "Well… you could have volunteered for kitchen or cleaning duties." He offered politely. "I know they usually switch up soldiers every week for these tasks - something about teaching them discipline - but I'm sure you could have arranged something if you were to talk to Patrick."
Having had enough, Matt ripped his hand away from Tom and stepped back, his fists balled up to his sides.
Startled, Tom turned around to look at him, seemingly confused by his unexpected reaction as Matt peered back at him with a dazed expression.
"What?"
"Do you really think that little of me? That I am not capable of handling anything important?" Matt flared. "That I should just lower my head and settle for the minor jobs nobody wants?"
Tom looked at him in alarm. "Oh, well, no! I just-"
"Just admit it! You think I am too sweet, naive, and dumb to do anything don't you? Just like Edd does! I am not like that anymore - I got my memories back, and I know who I am supposed to be now." Matt went on more firmly. "I know I wasn't the most reliable friend in the past, but at least give me a chance to prove myself. Don't assume I'm exactly the same without getting to know the real me first."
Tom was so astonished by Matt's passionate outburst he could hardly form coherent words.
There was a long pause between them. Matt could practically imagine what was going on through Tom's head and what he was about to say next. Oh Matt, don't make a big deal out of nothing. I'm just being the voice of reason, which you have none of. You're so naive and ridiculous. Quit being so dramatic. How about ice cream to lighten the mood?
Bowing his head, Tom approached and wrapped his arms around Matt in a fierce hug. "Matt, hey, I am so sorry." He said earnestly. "The last thing I wanted to do was to belittle you. I had no idea that's how you really felt!"
Breathlessly, Matt leaned into him. "It's- it's okay." He sniffled, muffled, into Tom's shoulder. He felt his anger melting and realized he'd been resenting Tom ever since they first discussed the possibility of him becoming a nurse only for Tom to shut him down.
"No it's not. I see now that I was insensitive and unfair to you." Tom murmured, pulling away slightly. "I of all people should know that people change, but I didn't take you into account. I guess I was so stuck in the past that I couldn't- hoped- that things would remain static after all these years being apart from each other. But it hasn't. I haven't! So why would you? If being a nurse is what you really want to dedicate yourself to then it's not my place to say otherwise. You do you, Matt."
Matt's heart leaped. He beamed at Tom. He listened. He really listened!
"You're right. It's been seven years. Time has passed and a lot has changed." Tom nudged him. "What would you like to do?"
"Well…" Matt considered his thoughts at great length. "I have exactly forty minutes before I need to get back to the Infirmary. We could go to the Mess Hall to grab a bite to eat and just… talk about ourselves?"
"Sounds good." Tom nodded.
Matt fell in step with Tom as they changed course and made their way up to the Mess Hall. It wouldn't hurt to test the waters again? "So… you and Tord, huh?"
Chuckling, Tom scratched the back of his head and glanced away; his cheeks flushed a pale tinge of pink. "Yeah?"
"You guys seem really cute together. I am legit happy for you." Matt went on. "But how come you seem so… resistant to him? Is it something to do with me?"
"No! No. Of course not. It's… it's just like I said, it's complicated. But you're not to blame."
"Then why…?"
Tom sighed, lowering his head. "Don't get me wrong. I love him. I really do! But…" He faltered, searching for words. "When I left him five years ago to carve out my own path, it was all bittersweet, you know? We hugged, kissed, said our good-byes, and that was it. We were on a break for a while."
They arrived in the Mess Hall just in time for breakfast and their conversation was put on hold. Getting in line, Matt grabbed a tray and selected a bowl of cereal and a glass of juice, while Tom got himself a mug of coffee and two pieces of buttered toast.
"As you were saying?" Matt prompted as they sat down on one of the more secluded tables in the cafeteria.
Tom fidgeted. "We kept in touch at first. Tord gave me a communicator to talk with him, Paul, and Pat. And it was nice having someone to report back to. Show off pictures, ask for advice, talk about my day and such. It made the journey less lonely." He trailed off, his eyes acquiring a distant longing to them as he stared down at his coffee. "But then the war started. It didn't affect me at first. But then the consequences reached me and I tried to get away - run from reality by going farther and farther away from the conflict."
Matt listened diligently. He did not dare interrupt and patiently waited for Tom to get the weight off his chest.
"The farther I went, the worse the war got. I had to watch as innocent people - people I met and befriended along my travels - suffered at the hands of the Red Army in the most heinous ways. By this point I had cut off all contact with Tord."
"You blame him?" Matt prompted.
Tom took a sip of his coffee. "Yes and no." He replied earnestly. "I can't exactly blame him for starting the war… when I am responsible for enabling him in the first place."
Matt blinked. "Enabling him?"
"I left him. I told him to end this war as efficiently as possible… when I could've stayed behind and made sure the war wouldn't get this bad." Tom murmured. "Ever since the war started I wondered if leaving was the right thing to do. I wanted to leave, it was the first time in my life I was sure of anything, but was it right for me to be selfish when the whole world is at stake? If I'd stayed by Tord's side maybe I could've mellowed him. Kept him from becoming the fierce dictator the whole world fears. Maybe things wouldn't have gotten this bad if I was by his side coaching him through it all."
"I mean, I get it, but you're not responsible for Tord's actions, Tom." Matt soothed.
"Oh, but I am. I most certainly am." Tom moaned in despair. "Don't you see, Matt? I am in love with the Red Leader. I love the man behind the war - who caused people to flee in terror from their homes, and die needlessly in battlefields. And I did nothing to stop him. How can I live with a sane conscience knowing that, despite all the horrible things he's done, I still love him?"
Matt gazed at his friend sympathetically. Even though this war is way out of Tom's control he clearly still blames himself for Tord's actions. "To be fair though, it's not like you love him because of all the awful stuff he did."
"Still, I feel awful being in any way associated with Tord or the Red Army after what they did. I have friends here! What does this say about me?" Tom went on anxiously. "Don't you feel bad about working for them?"
"Hey, I just started here, and frankly I haven't had the chance to do much." Matt protested. "I'm a nurse now. I intend to help people. I don't exactly have to concern myself with doing anyone harm. You know, the whole 'do no harm' rule and all. So I guess that excludes me from feeling guilty."
"I tried so hard in the past to coerce Tord from not going through with this war - to find a peaceful solution instead, but he just wouldn't listen to me."
"Tord is pretty stubborn." Matt remarked. "But I don't see how any of this is your fault. You tried to talk him out of war, he didn't listen, so you left to live your own life away from the army. What else could you have done in this scenario?"
"Tried harder."
Matt rolled his mismatched eyes. "The only reason Tord relented and agreed with our plan is because Edd is involved with the rebellion, remember? Do you really think he would have done so for anything else?" His gaze softened. "Tord loves you, you know. The war doesn't change anything. And heck; if you want someone to blame for this war, blame me! I enabled Tord to follow his ambitions as well."
Much to Matt's disappointment, Tom didn't appear convinced. He was staring intently into his coffee mug, watching the dark brown beverage swirl around his spoon with a look of concerned concentration in his digital eyes.
"So… if you are so bothered by the idea of being associated with the Red Army, why did you return then?"
Tom looked away. "For you." He mumbled. "I returned to Europe to try and play a part in the war as damage control; saving people directly affected by the war. It was just by sheer coincidence that I stumbled upon you, and by then I knew your best chance of making a meaningful recovery was with the Red Army. Believe me, I wouldn't have returned here otherwise."
"Oh… I'm sorry." Matt lowered his head.
"No, Matt. It's not your fault. Truth be told, I needed to come back here sooner or later. You were just the push I needed to get on with it already."
Come look for me. ~ Murmured the velvety voice in his head. Tom clenched his eyes shut. Come find me! ~
Matt tipped his head. "That might sound insane but why don't you just be open and honest with Tord about it? He is so worried about upsetting you again, and you are clearly distressed keeping this bottled up." He said. "Just say what you mean already! Don't keep him guessing in the dark; he doesn't have the obligation to read you. If something is the matter just out with it!"
Tom's eyes widened and he vigorously shook his head. "No, Matt, I can't! You mustn't tell him about this - you mustn't tell anyone!"
"What? Why not?" Matt blinked, startled.
"Promise me you won't tell anyone!"
"Okay! Okay! I won't say a word about this to anyone… but you really should, Tom." Matt had his palms out to try and soothe Tom's desperation. "The longer you drag this out, the more miserable the two of you will be."
"I'll take my chances." Tom huffed, turning away as he stirred his coffee. "Don't get me wrong; I will tell him eventually, but right now… his main priority should be talking to Edd and finding a way to settle this war peacefully. I don't want him to make the right choice simply because I told him to. I want him to do this because it's the right thing to do."
He redirected his gaze toward the second level balcony overlooking the cafeteria, where Red Leader was seated with his Generals also having breakfast. Tord's blind side was facing Tom so the Norwegian couldn't take note of their presence below. Tom watched him intently. How could he have forgotten what made him love Tord in the first place?
"You want to test him." Matt stated calmly.
Tom sighed. "In a way." He glanced back at his friend. "After all the horrible sh#t I've seen and heard about him out there in my travels, I want to see for myself if Red Leader truly has the world's best interest at heart like he claims… or if his ambition is going to get the best of him in the end."
Matt swallowed, nervous about the prospect of this test. Inwardly he felt compelled to warn Tord and see him succeed, get the man of his dreams, and live happily ever after ruling over the world together as a power couple. At the same time, however, he couldn't bring himself to crush Tom's only hope of seeing genuine good in Red leader, after he poured his heart out over his misgivings dating said man.
It was a valid concern.
He may not approve of the way Tom is going about this whole thing, but what can Matt do? He gave his opinion on the matter, and his friend elected to carry out his own plan instead.
"I really wanna hope again, Matt." Tom said, head bowed and desolate. "I want to believe in the best of Tord, and be proud of his accomplishments and how far he's come. But if the rumors end up being true, I don't know what I'll do."