Chapter 16:
Eric had just woken up startled from another nightmare. He had known that this was probably going to be the case. His mind just wouldn't shut up. It kept playing disturbing images and after the second time that it happened, he sort of refused to go back to sleep. He woke up sweaty and breathless and as he looked to his side, he could see that Calleigh was still there next to him, sound asleep...alive and in one piece. A little hurt but still in one piece. She was lying on her back, her hair tousled on the pillow, her arm up next to her head exposing her skin but also exposing part of the bruise she was sporting. Slowly but very carefully, Eric lifted her t-shirt enough to check her bruise. It was the cause of all of his nightmares. The thought that Seth had laid a hand on her...the thought that she had been punched and kicked and that he had wanted to touch her, that he had even thought certain things when it comes to Calleigh, it disturbed and angered him. Eric being a man, knows exactly what men think and it was just too much. Pulling down her t-shirt and covering her with the sheets, Eric got out of bed and out of the bedroom. He just needed some space. He needed to breathe. He needed to release the anger that was bubbling inside of him. A run would have been good or a session at the gym but it was the middle of the night and there was no way he was leaving this house and leaving Calleigh alone in the middle of the night. No. He just needed to figure this out because this was not the first time that he needed to release some steam in the middle of the night and he has never managed to completely solve this problem. If he was alone in his apartment then it would not be a problem. He would simply go for a run on the beach or anywhere for that matter. The problem arose on days like these when Calleigh was spending the night with him and leaving the house was not an option. Maybe I should invest in a home gym...some weights and punching bag at least he thought. That would solve this problem.
He was pacing in the living room trying to calm himself down but his mind was still racing. He could feel his blood boiling in his veins. He could still see flashes of the nightmare popping up. Calleigh being punched, Seth kicking her, Seth approaching her. He even had a nightmare of Seth having Calleigh cornered and his hand was sliding down her face as she begged him to stop.
'Damn it' he cursed, running a hand through his head.
He opened the doors of the balcony and stepped outside. He needed some fresh air. Sitting down on one of the empty chairs he always left there, he let his head drop in his hands. How was he supposed to get past this? It disturbed him too much, and what made it even worse was the fact that if he had the trouble of getting past it, then he could only imagine how hard it was going to be for Calleigh. He wanted to be there for her...he needed to be there for her, but he wasn't sure he knew what to say or do in this case. It was easier when the issue was Jake or her parents, but this...he needed to face what happened in order to be able to help her as much as possible. Then again, maybe he was underestimating Calleigh. She was a tough woman...a woman with incredible inner strength. A positive person. A person who always manages to get up after a horrible ordeal or situation, and maybe this time wouldn't be different, plus this time, she had him for support. She didn't have to do it all by herself.
'Hey...what are you doing out here?' he heard Calleigh ask him, her arms crossed in front of her. He wasn't sure if it was for protection, to make herself feel safe or if maybe she was feeling a bit cold from the breeze that filled the night.
'Calleigh...what are you doing here?' he asked her startled as he straightened and got up from his chair. He walked over to her and placed his hands on her shoulders ever so gently. The last thing he wanted to do was startle her. She knew he would never hurt her, but after what happened it was expected for her to be a bit jumpy. He would not take offense if that happens, because it would just be her instinct but it would reveal the state she is in.
'I believe I asked you that question first' she chuckled, and Eric couldn't help but laugh at that. It amazed him how she already had enough energy to smile after what happened. She didn't even flinch as he touched her and Eric couldn't help but feel relieved 'Nightmare?' she asked him.
'Yeah' he admitted as he lowered his gaze not wanting her to see what troubled him even if she probably had an idea 'You? Why are you awake?' he asked her concerned.
'Well my hands fell into an empty space' she started telling him.
'I'm sorry' he apologized 'Let's go back to bed' he told her but she stopped him.
'Hey hey where are you going?' she asked him extending her hand out grabbing his arm.
'Back to bed?' he simply replied.
'Nuh...we can stay here' she told him.
'But Calleigh you're still sleepy and you still need to rest' he told her.
'Eric...you know I'm not that fragile' she told him 'Yes I'm a little...hurt...but knowing that I am here with you...safe...I already feel much better' she told him. Eric smiled at her, let out a soft breath letting her know she won and went to sit back in his chair while Calleigh sat on the vacant chair opposite him.
'You amaze me you know' he told her.
'Why?' she asked with a chuckle as her cheeks blushed slightly. She was still adjusting to accepting all the wonderful things this amazing man says to her.
'Because look at you...you look so much better already and I dare almost say it that maybe I could be taking this situation worse than you are' he told her.
'Could be' she shrugged 'Maybe because you were on the outside and didn't know what was happening. I'm not saying that it didn't feel like a ticking time bomb all the time, but somehow I was managing to stretch the time I was giving myself and leave hidden messages for you guys to find. I kept my faith that you would find me' she told him smiling at him.
'But that's the thing Cal...I didn't do that' he told her, disappointment obvious in his voice.
'What do you mean you didn't?' she asked him.
'If you didn't leave us that hidden message of Club Desent and if you didn't send Tommy to us, I'm not sure we would have found you in time' he told her.
'But it doesn't matter Eric' she told him as she placed her hand on top of his 'That's why we are a team. We help each other. In situations like these, we have to help each other. We can't expect that only one side does all the work. It's a mix of help, luck, science and mistakes criminals make' she tried to show him 'What matters is that you were there and you were the first one I saw when I entered the room. Seeing you there gave me a lot of courage and security because I knew that I was finally safe and rescued and that nothing could happen to me then because you were there...because you were all there' she told him.
Eric smiled at her, picked up her hand and kissed her knuckles 'Thank you' he told her 'Damn I suck at these things' he said and Calleigh started laughing, not believing what she was hearing.
'And what makes you think that CSI Delko?' she asked him in her playful tone.
'Because I should be the one helping you move forward not the other way around' he replied.
'We help each other Eric or have you forgotten how many times you came to find me at the beach in the last few months? You have been there for me so many times and not just this year, and besides by saying all these things to you, I would be helping myself too because I remind myself what an amazing team we are...what amazing team you and I are' she told him.
It was the middle of the night and the stars and the moon were shining high above as the light breeze blew Calleigh's hair in her face, her eyes twinkling in the moonlight, her skin glistening in the light and she just looked so beautiful in his eyes.
'We do make an amazing team you and I...and I have the most beautiful and smart partner ever' he told her as he squeezed lightly her hand and Calleigh smiled at him. His eyes were full of adoration and love and Calleigh was so grateful to have him as her partner, not just at work but in her personal life as well.
'You're making me blush' she told him with a giggle and Eric smiled but his face quickly straightened as he watched her giggle stop abruptly and her face become serious. Her eyes closed as she tried to control her breathing. For a moment it had felt good to laugh, but that moment faded away the minute her injured side responded to the unexpected movement.
'Are you okay?' he asked her quickly, his face serious and his body ready to leap over the table if necessary. He was about to get up from his chair and Calleigh stopped him, squeezing his hand.
'Just...give me...a minute' she told him between controlled breaths.
His heart was pounding hard in his chest as he watched the few seconds, minutes that it took her to get her breathing even, go by. The thing that he couldn't do anything to help her, pained him. He watched her blink her eyes rapidly and then she took a slow calculated breath and opened her eyes.
'I'm okay' she told him.
'I'm sorry' he apologized.
'You have nothing to apologize for' she replied smiling at him as she tangled their fingers and smiled at him. He wanted to reach out and pull her into his arms but he couldn't do that with how they were seated.
'You know this seating area is nice but I can't hold you like this. I might start looking for some new outdoor furniture' he told her.
'Or you can move in with me' she blurted out almost surprising herself. They hadn't been together for that long and she hadn't even thought it through either, but the words just came out of her mouth like it was the obvious thing to say.
'What?' he asked her surprised.
'Would you like to move in with me?' she asked him with a shrug and a smile on her face.
'Where did this come from?' he asked her a smile creeping up his face 'I mean...I'd love to of course I'd love to but Calleigh I know you and you did not think this through. It just came out so if you want to take it back I will not get offended' he told her.
'You're right' she said and his face almost fell 'It did just come out and I did not think this through not as much as I usually do, but I had thought about it Eric. It had crossed my mind on that date that you planned for us. The thought of having you already home waiting for me was just something so beautiful. It was a really wonderful feeling and so natural. Nothing felt forced or like it shouldn't be and it isn't like we just got to know each other' she told him.
'Oh no for that matter we go way back' he said and then he smiled 'You really want me to move it with you?' he asked her softly.
'Yeah...well if you want' she told him.
'Of course I do Calleigh' he replied 'I'm just not sure there will be enough closet space' he joked and Calleigh laughed and slapped his arm.
'Don't make me laugh' she told him as she placed her free hand on her side 'I'm sure that can be arranged and besides you don't have to get the whole wardrobe either at least not just yet. You can just start slowly getting things in and just leave them there' she told him with a shrug.
Eric smiled. He simply couldn't stop smiling all of a sudden, and even if it was weird after the horrible ordeal they had just been through, it felt really good to smile. She was just too cute the way she was inviting him to stay with her.
'Plus right now it will help me a lot as well going back home and not being alone' she continued. She needed to say it. She knows that by saying things out loud, it helps her to confront the situation even if she doesn't necessarily like it 'I'm not sure I feel that safe at the moment on my own in the beach house. I'm feeling too exposed' she admitted.
'So you're using me?' he asked her teasingly and Calleigh smiled knowing he was joking 'Is that why you wanted to come here?' Eric asked her.
'Yeah' she admitted looking up to meet his eyes again 'There it's just so open you know and well I don't know if anyone is watching me or not after the stupid website. I mean I know he didn't post my address or at least I don't think so but he did post my number and I did get kidnapped. Here it feels like there are more walls sort of plus I am in your house, so it's like I have you all around me protecting me' she said and as the words came out she placed her hand to cover her mouth 'And I am saying way too many things' she said.
Eric smiled at her and took her hand in his 'I understand how you feel Cal...and I know you like to feel like you can handle the world all on your own but sometimes it is nice to have someone help you do that' he told her, his thumb caressing her knuckles.
'I know' she replied softly 'But you know sometimes it is a bit hard for me to accept that and I know that now that we are together, I need to start doing it more, like I need to try and be more open with you, realize that we do things together now' she told him.
'Exactly and you know I always want to be there for you but that being said I also know you and know when you need your space or when you need my shoulder to lean on, and if I ever miss out on a clue just let me know okay?' he told her and Calleigh nodded smiling at him.
'So you'll move in with me?' she asked him again.
'I will' he replied 'But when this ordeal is behind us...if you feel like we had rushed this step, I want you to let me know okay?' he told her.
'Okay...but I don't think I would want you to leave...not now that we are together' she told him and Eric smiled.
'You know...sometimes it still feels so...surreal' he admitted.
'I know how you feel' she admitted 'Sometimes I can't believe it myself. You know that sometimes I miss the earlier days when things were still unclear' she confessed.
'You do?' he asked her surprised 'Why?' he asked her. That time the situation had been tough having to deal with the fact that Jake was in the picture and Eric wasn't sure who she was going to pick and when she chose to try and work things out with Jake, she had hurt him deeply.
'Because I miss those moments when we used to get lost in each other's eyes and kiss. I miss when we were testing the waters you know and things were so new and fresh. When I was finally letting my feelings for you shine' she explained.
'I understand. It was a bit of a tough time, but we did have some amazing moments and good memories to cherish' Eric said as he let his mind drift to one particular moment 'Do you have a favorite memory of that time?' he asked her.
Calleigh hummed and let herself think. There had been so many wonderful moments from spending time at the beach, dancing, the playground...'This is a tricky question' she admitted 'I'm not sure about a particular moment but my favourite day was definitely when we went to the playground and then had those chicken pieces and after we went to the beach. The way you had kissed me...' she told him with a smile on her face. She was obviously recalling those moments and Eric smiled fondly. He knew exactly which kiss she was referring to. He had kissed her eyes first and then they had kissed and when they deepened the kiss and he pushed her on her back, their bodies craved for more.
'Yeah that night had been wonderful' Eric admitted as he looked at her adoringly.
'I think what I meant with missing those days is...I miss those moments when I could feel myself falling for you, the way it felt. That feeling you get you know what I mean?' she asked him.
'I do know what you mean' he admitted. It was the best feeling in the world. Those moments when he could feel her falling for him, the way she used to look at him, the way she was letting loose, those private moments they were getting together.
'What about you? Which moment is your favourite?' she asked him curiously.
Eric chuckled at that question. Of course she was going to ask him 'My favourite moment is probably that time when you sat on me on the couch, with the wine glass in your hand and you kissed me. You were so confident and it was just too damn sexy' he admitted and Calleigh let herself laugh. Well not a full laugh but as much as she could without hurting too much. She knew exactly which moment he was referring to.
'Yeah' she chuckled 'I could not believe I did that' she admitted.
'That was just took sexy...my mind reminds me of it very often' he admitted and Calleigh chuckled at that 'I'm sure it does' she told him before a yawn escaped her mouth and Calleigh smiled when she was ready 'Now that is definitely not very sexy' she said.
'You're tired...let's go to bed' he told her as he got up from the chair and walked over to her. He took her hand in his and lead the way into his bedroom, walked her to the side she was sleeping on and as she sat down, her eyes never left his and Eric knew what she was thinking but he didn't say anything. He simply tucked her in and walked over to his side, climbed in and let his body finally get close to her and Calleigh snuggled closer to him, as careful as she possibly could. She looked up in his eyes and parted her lips and Eric let his hand touch her face, pushing her hair behind her ear.
'We can't do it again Cal...I don't want to risk hurting you' he told her.
'I just want you to kiss me' she admitted looking straight in his eyes before she dragged them to his lips. She just loved looking at his lips, so full and kissable. He felt her hand move up his chest and damn it when she was touching him like this, being this close to him, it was so damn hard to keep control and not let himself get carried on.
Her thumb stroked his lower lip and then he watched her close the little distance and felt her lips against his, her breasts press against his chest. Closing his eyes, his hand moved to her back pulling her carefully closer to him as he deepened the kiss. His tongue danced with hers and damn she tasted so good. He just loved kissing her but he could feel himself wanting more so Eric started ending the kiss.
'We better stop' he whispered resting his forehead against hers.
'I know' she replied 'But when I get better...' she started telling him.
'When you get better we are going to spend a whole day in bed and I will make love to you until our bodies can't take it anymore' he promised and Calleigh smiled.
'I'm holding you to that' she replied and with that she turned on her side, cuddled in his arms. He kissed the top of her head and let sleep claim them.
oooOOOooo
'Are you ready?' he asked her as they parked the car in front of her house. She had walked into the kitchen while he was cooking breakfast for them with a frown on her face which immediately alerted Eric.
'Calleigh what's wrong?' he asked her as he put the fork down, wiped his hand and turned to give her his full attention. They had slept in obviously after they had woken up in the middle of the night and spent the best hour awake talking.
'I think...I think I wanna go home' she told him.
'Oh...okay' he told her. She had taken him a bit by surprise. She did tell him that she wanted him to move in with her but he didn't get the feeling that she was talking about this morning, although he did have in mind to bring up the subject again 'So why do you look upset?' he asked her.
'I don't know' she replied with a shrug 'I guess it's not that I really want to go...it's just that the longer it takes, the harder it gets...plus I don't want you to think that I don't want to stay here' she admitted.
'Oh Calleigh come on, I'm not going to think that' he assured her 'I tell you what...we have breakfast, get some things ready and we can go okay?' he asked her and Calleigh nodded.
She turned to look at him and nodded 'As ready as I'll ever be' she replied and then sighed 'I don't know why I am making such a big deal out of this...why I am so uncomfortable' she told him.
'You were just kidnapped two days ago Calleigh, I think you are entitled to feel a little edgy' he told her his hand settling on hers. He picked up her hand and kissed her knuckles and Calleigh smiled at him 'You are not going to be alone Cal. I'm right here with you, but if you feel like you need to leave just say so' Eric told her and Calleigh nodded.
'Thanks Eric...I don't know what I would do without you sometimes' she told him and now it was Eric's turn to smile at him. It always made his heart swell whenever Calleigh says something of the sort to him. He was still adjusting to having her being so open about her feelings but he sure liked it.
Few minutes later, they were standing behind the door and Calleigh took a moment to collect herself. She turned the key, opened the door and let her eyes take it all in. Everything was exactly like she had left it two days ago. Everything clean and in its place except for the odd bag and shoes and she had forgotten her robe on the back of the sofa. Taking a step inside, her eyes roamed the empty space for a moment. Eric closed the door, placed the bags on the floor and just stood there watching her.
'Okay' she said taking a deep breath 'I guess I need to make myself feel at home' she told him as she turned to look at him and Eric and smiled at her encouraging her.
He watched her moving around putting her stuff on the counter and then she started opening up the curtains and the windows to let some light and fresh air inside. She turned on the television to cut through the silence that filled the house. She was settling in again, so Eric moved into the kitchen not wanting to feel like he is assessing her, opened the fridge and pulled out a bottle of water.
'You want something to drink?' he asked her.
'Emm...no. Actually I think I'm gonna go have a shower if you don't mind and change into something more comfortable, maybe it helps me to feel better at home' she told him.
'Sure go ahead' he told her and then watched her as she walked over to him and kissed his lips. His hand snaked around her back pulling her to him, his free hand immediately cupping the back of her head, his fingers vanishing into her locks as he deepened the kiss for a moment. He heard her moan into his mouth and that was his queue to slow down. Ending the kiss, he pecked her lips one more time and then smiled at her.
'Now you can go' he told her grinning and Calleigh smiled at him feeling somehow better, like the kiss had magically lifted half of the weight from her shoulders. Kissing his lips one more time, she turned and walked away into the bathroom.
He let out a deep breath and smiled as his eyes settled on the photos she had stuck against the fridge with a magnet. He didn't even have a second to think about those days when he heard a knock on the door, immediately alerting his senses. He glanced back to check if Calleigh was on her way out or not, and walked over to the door. He wasn't sure who could be here, as far as he knows Calleigh didn't contact anyone and even their friends texted him to check on her thinking that she had been resting, so it wasn't them. He checked through the peep hole only to find Cooper standing behind the door.
Anger flashed through him as his heart started pounding savagely in his chest and Eric pulled the door open a little bit too hard 'What the hell are you doing here?' Eric barked 'You're not welcome here' he told him as he stepped into the doorway making himself bigger to prevent him from walking inside.
'Is Calleigh here?' Cooper asked him.
'Calleigh is not your concern, leave her alone Cooper' Eric told him. Cooper could see that Eric was not joking and that he was walking on thin ice with him. He had made it crystal clear when he had barged into his apartment and threatened to kill him if something happened to her. The last thing that he wanted was to get into an argument with Eric. He knows how protective he always was of her, and now he was probably even more. He knew it was a risk coming here. He assumed that she would not be alone and that Eric would probably be here with her, but he had to take that chance because he needed to talk to her. When he had started the website, he was still furious with her for crashing his dreams of ever becoming a CSI, but he never intended for her to get kidnapped. He just wanted to expose her personal life, expose her for the person that she was when it comes to men. She was no saint in his books, at least at the time, that was how Cooper could see Calleigh after what happened, but when he found out that she had been kidnapped, and Eric's threat started to take its toll on him, Cooper could feel the weight of what he has done on his shoulders and that was why he had gone to MDPD and gave them the memory card.
'Cooper?' they heard Calleigh's voice coming from behind Eric, making both men look in her direction. Eric didn't think she heard him. She should still be in the shower but Eric soon realized that she was still wearing the same clothes, which meant she hadn't even started the shower. She had heard Eric talking and at first she thought that maybe he was talking on the phone but then she heard the anger in his voice, Calleigh knew that something was not right, so she hurried to him only to find him talking to someone in the doorway.
'Calleigh' Cooper said as he met her eyes.
'He was just leaving' Eric said sternly as he turned to look at him, giving him a death stare.
'Please Calleigh can I talk to you?' Cooper asked her ignoring the death glare Eric was giving him, as she approached the two men. She was almost next to Eric but he made sure to not let her past him. The last thing that he wanted was for Calleigh to come anywhere near Cooper. The man had been the cause of her being kidnapped, and in Eric's books that was it. He got Calleigh hurt whether he wanted to or not, and to Eric that was unforgivable.
'I said get the hell away from here. GO' Eric ordered him his voice harsh and steady as he pointed with his hand for him to leave. She could feel his body vibrating with anger but Calleigh placed her hand on his back.
She really hated doing this but she needed to and Eric will have to understand eventually 'Cooper wait' Calleigh told him and Eric froze next to her. She could feel his eyes on her so she looked up at him apologetically before she looked back at Cooper 'Come in' she told him.
'What?' Eric asked her wide eyed as he took a step back and pulled his hand from her like she had suddenly burned him. At that moment, Calleigh could feel the tears burn the back of her eyes. The hurt and the anger she saw in his eyes broke her, but Calleigh knew that she was making the right choice.
'Look guys I don't want to cause any more trouble' Cooper told them, seeing Eric's reaction.
'Just give us a minute' Calleigh told him and with that she took Eric's hand into hers and lead them to the kitchen while Cooper just waited behind the door.
'Why are you inviting him in?' Eric asked her furious, running his hand through his head and down his face in frustration. Has she lost her mind?!
'Because I need to put an end to this' she explained.
'What? You're not making any sense Cal' Eric replied too angry to even try to understand.
'Look I know you do not agree with this but I will explain everything later okay? Can you just trust me for now?' she asked him as she stepped closer to him, her hands now on his hips, her eyes pleading with his.
'Fine' he replied 'I don't like this but I trust you. He tries one stupid move and I throw him out on his ass' he warned her and Calleigh smiled at him.
'Deal...Thank you Eric' she told him. She wanted to kiss him but refrained not wanting to give away what was going on between them more than they already did in front of Cooper. The last thing that they wanted was for him to go and make their relationship public on the bloody website.
They walked over to the table and sat down, Eric taking a seat behind Calleigh to put as much distance from Cooper as much as possible, not trusting himself to be so close to him. One wrong move from Cooper and Eric would punch the hell out of him. He still had no idea how the hell he didn't punch the hell out of him the previous day when he went over to his house and threatened him, although Eric was pretty sure that his threat had shaken Cooper to the bones. He could see it in his eyes later when he had appeared at MDPD to give him the memory card.
Cooper sat across from Calleigh, away from Eric feeling the weight of their stares weighing heavily on him. He wasn't sure from where to start but he knew he needed to start somewhere so... 'I'm sorry for what happened Cal' he told her.
'Sorry?' Eric jumped 'Do you really think sorry is going to cut it?' Eric asked him.
'Eric' Calleigh whispered. She wanted to turn and place her hand on his thigh but if she dared move, her side would have protested and Calleigh was desperately trying to avoid that, because she knew it would only make Eric angrier, so she adjusted her chair so she could try and have her chair next to his.
'Do you realize in how much danger you put her in?' Eric asked him.
'I know Eric...that's why I came here to apologize' he tried to explain, his voice cracking a bit and Calleigh could tell that Dan was feeling a bit scared of Eric and well she couldn't exactly blame him. Eric has always been very protective of her and obviously since their relationship developed, his protectiveness had taken a whole other level if that was even possible 'Look...I know nothing I say can take what happened but...at the time I blamed Calleigh for losing my job...for my dream of becoming a CSI being crushed' Cooper said and Eric was about to jump off his chair when Calleigh placed her hand on his thigh and Cooper put out a hand in front of him 'Please let me continue' he asked him 'I know this is hard for you Delko. I know...I messed with two people you love dearly and I realize now how much I have hurt you. I don't expect you to forgive me...that would be too much to ask but at the time I couldn't see the pain I was causing...I couldn't see that the mistakes I have done were too big' Cooper told them.
Silence fell in the room as Cooper stopped talking for a minute giving them some time to think about what he was saying. Calleigh was lost in her thoughts as she recalled that day they found him in the bar. The hurt and the heartache they felt...the moment it hit her that Eric had been seeing Speedle all because of Cooper's actions. She had seen red the minute he said he didn't hurt anyone because Speedle is dead. Tim had been too much of a close friend, more like a brother and his death had weighed heavily on both Eric and Calleigh. It had pulled them apart at times and got them closer in other times, but it was like that moment had set a chain of events where heartache and loss would become their friend...and that was why Calleigh had decided to give Cooper a chance to explain himself because she needed to break this chain. She knew it was going to be too hard to get Eric to understand but hopefully after Dan leaves, she would be able to sit down with him and have a heart to heart talk.
Eric on the other hand needed space and time. He got up from the chair, pushing it backwards with the back of his knees and started pacing the room far away from Cooper. Cooper's actions had taken Eric back to three years ago making him feel the loss of his brother Speedle all over again. He often thought about him, practically every day at some point or another. Most of the times, he managed to hide it, not wanting Calleigh or the rest of his colleagues especially Horatio to worry about him or get them to feel that loss all over again. When Speedle died, a part of Eric had died with him. Speedle and Calleigh and Horatio were the only people Eric ever allowed to get to close to his heart. Growing up in a dangerous neighborhood had made life difficult and Eric although always with a generous heart and ready to help anyone, had to keep people at arms length at times, and only knew the meaning of family of those related by blood but when he became a CSI and became part of this team, Eric had found a connection with the other three people that he knew he would never be able to find again. Even now with their current team, although he cares a lot about Wolfe and Natalia, and if something had to happen to them he would be devastated, he cannot say that the connection is the same, especially with Wolfe. Maybe it was because he was the one replacing Speedle and Eric had taken it really hard. He just couldn't accept him on board instead of Speedle. It had taken them a lot of time and a lot of arguments with Calleigh ending up being the referee between the two men to get to the point they are in now.
And then there was the matter of Cooper getting Calleigh kidnapped indirectly. Touching Speedle had been hard but putting Calleigh's life has been something on another level. He had put the love of his life in danger and in Eric's books, that was just a line that once you cross it, there was no going back.
'I understand now how wrong of me it was...how insensitive it was. I never intended for things to go that far I swear. I guess I had a problem I was not aware of' he admitted.
'I'm glad you finally see that what you did was wrong' Calleigh finally said.
'I do Cal and I am sorry. I can never apologize enough. It won't change anything unfortunately...I cannot take what I did back, but I promise you I will work on myself to become a better person' he told her.
'I'm glad to hear that' Calleigh told him. She looked at Eric and could see the pain in his eyes even if he was trying his best to hide it. He looked so broken and fragile at the moment. Maybe Dan couldn't really see it but Calleigh could see the defeat in the slumber of his shoulders, could see the emptiness in his brown eyes 'I wish I can tell you that all is forgiven...but I can't' she told him and Cooper's head dropped down 'But...I really appreciate you coming here and admitting that you've been wrong, that you realize your mistake and that you want to help yourself become a better person' she told him and Cooper gave her half a smile for the first time in forever.
'I understand Cal...I know it will take time...I promise I will not cause anymore trouble' he assured her and Calleigh nodded. Copper chanced a glance towards Eric in hope that he could make amends with him as well, but Eric was facing outside lost in his thoughts, his arms crossed in front of his chest. Cooper got up from his chair and stepped to the side 'I'm sorry Delko...I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you...maybe one day you can find it in your heart to forgive me' he told him and with that he turned to leave, but Eric didn't move a muscle. With his head down, Cooper made his way to the door while Calleigh followed behind him 'I wish you two all the best Cal...you deserve to be happy together. I'm sorry I was so bitter and trashed you like that' Cooper told her.
'Okay' she replied. She didn't want to tell him that it is alright or forgiven because he is not, not when Eric was in some dark place again going through all the heart ache again from losing Speedle and thinking he could have lost her too. With that Cooper gave her one last nod and walked out of her house and out of her life for good.
Calleigh sighed heavily and closed the door behind him. She stood where she was taking a moment to herself to comprehend what just happened and before she had to turn to face Eric. She knew he was angry and disappointed and did not approve of what she did, but deep down she knows that she did the right thing. She just needed closure and after her talk with Eric, which was inevitable, this episode would hopefully be closed. Taking a deeper breath, she turned to face him as she slowly and very carefully approached him.
'Eric' she whispered as she tentatively placed her hands on his back, but Eric didn't reply nor did he turn to look at her 'Okay...I understand you are angry with me but can you let me explain?' she asked him.
And Eric turned to look at her at that 'Cal I am not angry with you. I just don't get it. How can you welcome someone who got you kidnapped into your own home? What if he had a gun on him?' he asked her.
Okay...so he is just worried about me, she thought 'Oh come on Eric, do you really think he was going to do anything to me with you here after you threatened to kill him if something happened to me?' she asked him.
She had a point and he knew it. He was just not ready to see Cooper, that's it really. He was still pissed off with him, still angry for exposing Calleigh like that, still angry for making him loose Speedle all over again. The flashes were still quite fresh and he could still see Speedle so clearly in his head, hear his voice. It was just hard and then to have Calleigh kidnapped, the woman he had loved since forever, and all at the hands of Cooper, Eric was just finding it too hard to get past it. Calleigh always seem to do a much better job than him in this sector. She seems to be handling everything much better.
'Look' Calleigh started telling him as she took both hands in hers and made sure to look into his eyes 'Cooper is not a bad person, he just made one mistake' she started telling him.
'One mistake Cal?' he asked her giving her that look that was suggesting that maybe possible she must have forgotten a detail or two.
'Okay two' she said 'But that is why I gave him the time to listen to him. I wanted to put an end to this...this chain of events that just keeps hitting us with one thing after the other' she told him.
'What are you talking about?' he asked her furrowing his eyebrows.
She sighed heavily, looked down a bit knowing she was going to touch some major subjects which Eric doesn't like to talk about, and lead him to the couch to take a seat. Still holding his hand in hers, she sat down close to him, knees touching wanting to give him the comfort of her touch 'Ever since...ever since Speedle died' she started telling him and Eric took in a sharp breath at the rude reminder of their friend being killed. She started rubbing soothing circles with the pad of her thumb on his knuckles as she continued 'It is like one thing after the other. Like we can't catch a break. Hagen, your sister...my kidnapping...and giving him a chance to explain and apologize, I feel like I have given him a chance to start over again in his life instead of keep going down the road that he has started. I feel like if I didn't do this, who knows maybe something else would have happened next because he would still be pissed off at me. Like this we had a chance to talk and calm things down, and he really did look like he was sorry for what happened. That is why I listened plus I needed closure. Like this now that part is behind us and we can start thinking of healing and moving forward instead of worry that maybe he would be cooking up something else' she explained.
Eric was quiet thinking about everything that she had just said to him. She did have a point and it was true. It has been one thing after the other, and maybe who knows, maybe now they will catch a break.
'Okay...I understand' he told her.
'You do?' she asked him, trying to look into his eyes to make sure that he was telling the truth.
'Well maybe not completely but I understand why you did it' he admitted 'I think the problem is me' he told her.
'What do you mean Eric?' she asked him.
'I think I'm just...I'm just having a hard time moving on from what happened. It isn't just the part of him using Speedle's credit card and making me think that he was back. It isn't just the fact that he exposed you and got you kidnapped but the fact that he messed with me with the two people that I cherish the most. He knows how close me and Speed were even if he didn't know him personally but everyone knows how hard I took his death, and he knows what you mean to me Cal...and he still went ahead and did all that. I thought we were supposed to be friends and yet he didn't even consider me once before he acted. Maybe that is what is getting to me, I don't know. Speedle would have never done that...nor would have Wolfe for that matter. Granted maybe me and Cooper weren't super tight but I don't know. He messed with you and Tim and I can't seem to move past that' Eric told her.
'You will don't worry...eventually it will get better' she told him cupping one cheek and giving him a smile as she squeezed one hand. He leaned into her hand, turned his head and kissed the inside of her hand.
'I love you so much Cal' he told her.
'I know you do' she replied softly with a smile 'I love you too Eric' she told him and with that she leaned in and kissed his lips.
oooOOOooo
Later that day, when the moon was out and most of the people were heading back home, Calleigh and Eric found themselves on the beach, in their usual spot, Calleigh sitting between his legs, her head resting against his chest, his arms wrapped around her waist as her own hands settled on his arms, her fingers dancing on them. The water calm but still it came hitting the sands softly where the water and the sand meets, shimmering in the moonlight, as music could be heard in the distance, the stars twinkling up in the dark blue skies like diamonds giving it the perfect touch.
Calleigh sighed happily and Eric kissed the side of her face as she leaned into his kiss 'You feel so relaxed' he whispered as he tightened his hold on her a bit.
'I am' she replied 'It feels like I haven't been here in ages' she told him.
'Well it hasn't been that long but I understand what you mean. So much has happened in the last few days, it does feel like it has been a long time since we came here' Eric replied.
'Yeah' she replied. There was silence for quite a long time both their minds going somewhere along the same lines but in different paths before Calleigh spoke up again 'Are you okay?' she asked him. It has been over eight hours since Cooper left and it had taken Eric quite a while to calm down his dark thoughts 'Are you still angry with me?' she asked him as she shifted slightly in his arms so she could look in his eyes, even though she knew he clearly wasn't.
'I'm not mad at you Calleigh' he assured her as he took one hand in his letting the pad of his thumb stroke her knuckles 'I may not understand to a certain extent why or how you could do that...but I trust you and I trust your judgement. If it is what you needed to have closure and maybe...just maybe end this vicious cycle we seem to be in of heartache and horrible situations, then I am all for it. I know it's going to take me a while to forgive Cooper, if I ever get there, but I will not dwell on it anymore. The important thing now is that you are here safe and sound in my arms. Nothing is more important than that' he told her holding her gaze and Calleigh smiled at him.
'Well I am glad to hear that' she told him before she leaned in and kissed his lips. She fully intended for the kiss to be just a peck on the lips but Eric had other ideas. His hand cupped the back of her head and pressed for entrance which she granted. His tongue tangled with hers as he took her breath away with all the intensity he put in the kiss. She wasn't sure from where all this came from but who was she to complain? He just left her breathless and soon Calleigh had to end the kiss to take some much needed air. She was literally dizzy from his kiss. Her head was spinning slightly and Calleigh was finding it hard to focus which Eric noticed.
'Are you okay?' he asked her with a chuckle looking all amused at her.
'Yea' she laughed back 'You emm...just left me...breathless' she admitted and Eric pulled her in and kissed the side of her head with a smile on his face.
'That good huh?' he teased and Calleigh slapped him on his chest which made both of them laugh out loud.
'Where did that come from?' she asked him 'I mean...why did you kiss me like that?' she asked.
'Because that ordeal if finally behind us now. I mean yeah I know we still have to deal with all the after effects of it but you're here...safe in my arms' he told her and Calleigh leaned back into his arms and sighed. He wasn't sure what to make of the way she sighed. To him it didn't sound like a complete happy sigh which made him frown.
'What's up?' he asked her.
'What do you mean what's up?' she asked, knowing full well what he was talking about.
'The way you sighed. It didn't sound like you are fully happy...what's up? Something I did? Something happened that I don't know about?' he asked her.
Calleigh sighed heavily then and pulled herself out of his embrace, pulling her legs up to hug her knees as her eyes settled on the ocean ahead of her, trying to find the words to tell him what happened while he was in the shower earlier. She wasn't really sure why she didn't tell him immediately, except for probably the fact that he already had to deal with Cooper knocking on her door. She knew he was still processing what happened and when he walked out of the shower, with just a towel around his waist and still a little wet, she really didn't feel like spoiling the mood. They were supposed to be getting ready to head out but instead, Calleigh found herself pulling the towel from around his waist, letting it drop to the floor, leaving him naked in their bedroom, and obviously, one thing let to another even if Eric tried to stay in control and away from her advances, reminding her that she was still injured and in a bit of pain but Calleigh wouldn't have any of it. She wrapped her hand around him and started stroking him and before he knew what was happening, he was undressing her and they were making love. She could not tell him about the message she received then. She just wanted to stay in that blissful moment and not let anything spoil the bliss of the afterglow. She had managed to hide and block all the other thoughts that had nothing to do with them at that moment, and she had managed up until then, or so she thought.
'It's my mother' Calleigh stated as she turned in his arms to look him in the eyes 'She texted me while you were having a shower' she informed him.
Eric was not expecting that of all the things that could have happened. His mind was actually going more on the lines of maybe Cooper had gone back or something like that 'And...what did she want?' he asked her.
'She found out I was kidnapped' Calleigh started telling him but as the word came out of her mouth, she felt Eric tense, so she took his hand in hers and started playing with his fingers trying to ease his tension out 'And that I was rescued. She was just checking on me to see how I am doing' Calleigh told him.
Eric studied her for a moment because there was clearly more than she was saying. He knows that when it comes to her mother, the subject is very sensitive especially after the way they left things the last time they met 'And...what did you tell her?' he asked her.
'Nothing yet. I didn't reply' Calleigh told him.
'Calleigh...' Eric started saying with a warning tone.
'I know I know' she started raising a hand to stop him 'It's just...I don't think I am ready to talk to her yet. I mean after the last time I spoke to her, I fully intended on never speaking to her again' Calleigh told him 'And now...what? I have to just reply because she finally decided to care about her daughter and check on her?' Calleigh asked him getting pissed off.
'No...you don't have to just reply but...' Eric started telling her but she cut him off.
'All my life I had to go along with what she wanted, always at her own pace, at her own convenience, never once cared how I was feeling or how I what she was doing affected me, and now after I gave her hell the last time I saw her, she decided that she wants to check on me? She didn't care how getting arrested was going to affect me, did she? Did she care enough about me when she decided to hit on you? No she didn't' she told him and with that she got up and walked a couple of steps away, completely upset.
Eric got up and walked over to her, carefully and very slowly placing his hands on her shoulders, as he squeezed them just a bit for her, massaging them lightly for a brief moment 'Listen Calleigh...I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do or not ready for but...let me ask you this...if God forbid anything happens to your mum...how would you feel? Would you not care or would you feel indifferent?' he asked her 'I just don't want you to take a decision that is maybe taken because you are still angry with her and then grow to have regrets or any kind of remorse...that is all' he told her.
Calleigh sighed heavily at that and turned to look at him. She knew deep down that he was right. She was still angry at her after what had happened and that was why she refused to text her but deep down she also knew that Eric was right. She needed to text her because she didn't want to have any regrets. It was only the fact that she was tired of dealing with her parents.
'Let me tell you something' Eric started telling her as he cupped her face with both hands, making her look at him 'Earlier you said that the reason you let Cooper in was so you would have closure, so you could put what happened behind you. Why don't you do the same in this case then? Why don't you invite her over then and talk...really talk?' he asked her.
Calleigh's mouth fell open but nothing came out for a while until she finally found her voice 'You want me to invite her over?' she asked him perplexed that he would even suggest such a thing.
'I'm not telling you to do it now. Just let her know that you are safe and when you are ready...do it' he told her with a shrug.
Calleigh was quiet after that. The mood was ruined and her brain was thinking so there was just no point in staying there, so slowly they started making their way back home, hand in hand while his thumb caressed her knuckles letting her know that she was not alone in this.
Back at the house as they started getting ready to have some much needed sleep, Calleigh was already lying on her good side when Eric got into bed behind her immediately and carefully wrapping his arm around her. He could feel her thinking. She was quiet, hardly said a word since they left the beach, so he kissed her shoulder 'Whatever you decide to do, know that I am always here to support you' he told her, his hand moving up and down her arm and Calleigh nodded before she turned a bit so she could meet his eyes.
'Thank you Eric' she told him.
'You're welcome' he replied smiling at her 'Now get some sleep. Good night Cal...I love you' he told her before he leaned in and kissed her lips.
'Good night Eric...I love you too' she told him kissing him back and giving him a smile that didn't reach her eyes. He smiled at her and stroked her hair and with that she turned back, pressing her back against his chest and tried to sleep but he mind was thinking. Not long after, she could hear Eric slightly snoring behind her so with a deep sigh, she slowly and very carefully reached for her phone and opened her mother's message again.
'Just found out what happened. Let me know that you are okay' the message said.
Her green eyes stared at it for quite a while before she started typing back 'I'm okay and safe at home...Are you still in Miami?' Calleigh asked her.
She was about to put the phone back on the furniture next to the bed when a new message came in 'Yes'.
Calleigh stared at the simple word contemplating what to do but deep down she knew Eric was right and that he only wanted what was best for her so she started typing 'Do you want to come over and talk tomorrow?' Calleigh asked.
'Sure...what time?' she asked her.
So Calleigh sent her the time and address and hoped to God she won't regret this decision before placing the mobile back next to her bed and tried to get some sleep because she was going to need all her energy to face her mother tomorrow.