Naoto, Maki and Orihara were standing in the parking lot, the sun starting to rise behind them. The day ahead of them was promising to be grueling and miserable.

With a deft hand, Naoto retrieved the smart phone from his pocket and began pulling up his contacts. Despite knowing how unlikely he was to receive a response, Naoto called Nagatoro's phone.

It immediately went to voicemail, as expected.

Naoto did not bother to leave a mail, not expecting Nagatoro to listen to anything, before deleting it at this point. Instead, he turned toward the two women next to him, who were lost in thought.

"What's the plan?" Naoto wondered.

Orihara slowly shook her head. "I don't know Naoto. If Nagatoro wants to disappear, maybe that's for the best."

"I would agree," Maki said bitterly. "But I am worried about her doing something incredibly stupid. I'd like to at least make sure she's not that far gone."

Naoto chewed on his lip as he considered their next step. Last Naoto had seen her, was the evening prior, at a venue, about three hours from their current location. Add to that, his assumption of her returning to here, from there, was incorrect, it gave her way too much of a head start. Without help and a larger coverage, there wasn't much they could do.

"We need some help," he concluded.

Maki scoffed with a raised brow. "Sure. Okay. Who?"

Naoto looked at her with a pleading look, which instantly caused Maki to shrink into herself. "I'm sorry."

There was a clear conflict raging on within the fiery woman, that Naoto could not reasonably blame her for. Here she was, with the man she loved, having abandoned everything and everyone without a moment's notice, the moment that Nagatoro had shown herself. She had believed in him, trusted him to remain clear of mind and he instantly failed to live up to those expectations.

And while Naoto was not driven by a misguided sense of passionate love, as Maki may have feared, his borderline obsessive behavior had been off putting to them nonetheless.

The artist simply nodded, before pulling up his contacts once more and staring at the pinned ones at the top. With a heavy sigh, he called the second one in the list.

It didn't even take three seconds for the person to pick up.

"Naoto!?"

"Hey Tadano," Naoto spoke shamefully. "How are you?"

"Are you okay? Is Gamo still there with you?"

"Yeah," he confirmed. "She's right here with me."

"Thank god."

Naoto felt a deep cut in his heart, listening to how much sorrow, how much pain, was seemingly lifted from his friend upon hearing his voice. This was his fault; he had caused this.

"I am sorry for last night Tadanao," he apologized, feeling like a fool. "I wasn't thinking straight. I got messed up on stage and I-"

"It's okay Naoto," his friend interrupted him. "We can talk about it when you get back."

"About that."

"What?"

Naoto sighed. "I know this is like an absolute joke after last night, but, I need your help."

"Of course. What do you need?"

The artist couldn't even put into words just how screwed his life would be without this man in it. "I- You're not going to like this."

"I don't doubt that."

"We're trying to find Nagatoro. She up and left University, without telling anyone."

"Well, that's not great."

"It's not," Naoto agreed, feeling the palm of his hand starting to sweat. "Are you guys still near the venue?"

"Yeah, we started packing up, but we wanted to make sure you were fine, or not on your way here, before we left."

There was another, massive pang of guilt. "W-Well, I saw Nagatoro at the concert yesterday."

"Seriously!?"

"Yeah, that's why I- Well."

"I get it. So, you are hoping she's still around here somewhere?"

"Correct."

"Alright, I'll tell the other. We'll get on it."

Naoto breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you Tadano."

"Of course," Tadano assured, a smile audible in his words, before Naoto hung up and turned to Maki and Orihara.

"Alright, they'll start looking for her."

"T-That's not going to be enough," Orihara pointed out. "She could have just hopped on a train and gotten out of there."

"But what if she didn't?"

"So, we're working on wishful thinking?"

Maki elbowed Orihara. "Stop it."

"Please!" the woman fired back. "As if you want to participate in this."

"No, I do not want to," Maki agreed, her gaze fierce. "But I will regardless, because that's the right thing to do! The woman may put herself in danger. Regardless of the shit she's pulled, I've known her for too long to just abandon her when she's at a breaking point."

Orihara sighed and hung her head in defeat. "You guys are too much. Whatever. Let me know what I can do."

"Did she ever mention any spots to you that she likes to hung out at?" Naoto questioned, but Orihara could only shake her head.

"No, she usually just kept to herself. Never really shared much with me."

Naoto cocked his head in contemplation. There wasn't enough information about Nagatoro available to him, ever since their high school years. All of the factoids he was aware of, he had been given second hand by others, like Maki. Even then, it wasn't a lot.

"Maki," Naoto spoke up suddenly. "You've known her longer than anyone. Where would she go during a time like this?"

Maki placed her index finger on her lip and hummed quietly. Naoto wondered how many good, joyful memories the redhead shared with Nagatoro. It was unbelievable to him, that the two of them had, in such a short time, grown apart after so many years of friendship, due to him of all things.

"Our hometown," Maki exclaimed startlingly quickly. "Why didn't we think of that sooner!? That was the last time she was actually happy. High school days."

Naoto had to nod in agreement. That made sense.

"Then we better get to driving." Naoto responded as he turned toward his rental car. "Orihara, you stay here, in case she comes back!"

Orihara watched both Naoto and Maki running to their individual cars, a sigh escaping her. "Sure. As if that was gonna happen."

On the road, racing down the highway as fast they could, Naoto had Maki coming through his speaker.

"So, this may not be the right moment," Maki's compressed voice filled the car. "But- You were talking of being my, uh, boyfriend?"

Naoto couldn't help but let out a cynical chuckle. "Definitely not the right moment."

"Can you blame me?"

"No. But if you wanted a heartfelt moment, this is not when it'll happen."

Naoto could hear Maki quietly sighing in her car.

"I am aware Naoto. It's just... exhausting. I feel like I've done everything wrong. Every time I think I can help out, or make things better for you, things end up getting worse. At some point, I have to just stop and ask if that's my fault. So, when you said that- I- I've been pushier than usual, because I was worried, I could be losing you. I am not fantastic when it comes to handling emotions. I try, but I am still unfamiliar with being in love. I know how to be physical. That, I've always been good at."

"I am not asking you to be fantastic," Naoto replied, his foot easing off the gas slightly. "You're doing your best. That's all anyone can ask of you."

"If only we took our own advices."

"Madness."

Maki let out a quiet laugh, one that managed to warm Naoto's heart for the first time that day.

"Naoto," the redhead called out, after silence settled in once more. "If- If you still want to be with her. Just tell me. The hope, this anticipation, it's killing me."

Naoto shook his head, despite her being unable to see him.

"I don't," he firmly responded. "I just want her to be safe."

There was another bout of quiet, lasting longer this time. Naoto didn't feel like pushing Maki for an answer, nor did he have much more to say at the moment, so he remained silent as he forced the car to continue over the speed limit.

Suddenly, a uncomfortable idea popped into his mind.

"Maki, I'll hang up for a moment," he explained. "I'm gonna make a call."

"To whom?"

The phone rang a handful of times. There was a moment where Naoto actually worried, she wasn't going to pick up.

Luckily, when he had already given up hope, the call was accepted.

"Hello? Naoto?"

Naoto briefly smiled at the confused tone, yet that quickly vanished when he remembered the situation they were in.

"Yoshi, I need your help," he opened, without much in the way of easing into things.

"W-What with? It's rather early."

Naoto looked at the display behind the steering wheel and muttered a curse under his breath at the realization he had forgotten the time.

"I am sorry," he apologized sincerely. "Time slipped my mind."

"It's okay," Yoshi responded quietly. "What do you need?"

Naoto braced himself for potential impact. "We're trying to find Nagatoro. She went missing."

There was an unsettling silence that followed his statement and for a second, he honestly believed Yoshi had hung up.

"She's missing?" Yoshi asked uncertainly.

"Yeah. Went to check on her at University. Turns out, she grabbed all her stuff and vanished without saying a word. Also, she was at my concert last night."

"Oh."

Yoshi's voice was shaky, filled with anxiety. Naoto felt awful for getting her involved, but he was sincerely hoping that, given she was still living in their old town, she could get the search started.

"We're currently going with the assumption she went back home," he explained. "So, we're driving there right now, trying to find her, to make sure she's okay. Do you think you could look for her?"

There was a sharp intake of air, followed by a pained groan. Naoto raised an eyebrow, confused by what had just happened.

"Sure," Yoshi eventually replied. "I- I'll do my best. For you."

"Thank you, Yoshi. I really appreciate it."

"You're welcome. Just, please be careful Naoto. I don't want her to hurt you more than she already has."

Naoto's lips curled into a downcast smile. "I will be."

With that, the artist hung up the call and let out a tense sigh. This was so much more complicated than it had any right to be. He could feel some resentment toward Nagatoro building once more, feeling though as if she was doing this to him out of spite. But he quickly shook the feeling off.

This was not like her. She didn't just vanish. And why did she show up to his concert, if this was her plan all along?

Too many questions that had little room to be resolved.

And why were her eyes not the same?

The moment they entered town, and those familiar sights and sounds came into view, Naoto felt a strange sense of not belonging. This town was home to the teenager, whose heart was filled with love and passion for his craft. It was where this boy had spent much of his life, honing a craft that he knew, he would never truly excel at.

Yet, he tried. He had a purpose. He had a passion.

While there was still a drive behind his actions nowadays, it wasn't the same.

He wasn't the same.

Naoto intentionally avoided taking the road that would lead him past his mothers old house and instead drove toward the small plaza in the center of town, with Maki on his heel.

The moment he stepped out of the car, the chill air caused him to shiver.

Maki joined him and the two made their way into town.

"Let me call Yoshi," Naoto said. "Let her know we're here."

Maki nodded and watched as Naoto pulled out his phone to call the woman. Evidently, she picked up rather quickly.

"Hey Yoshi," the artist greeted her. "Any luck so far?"

"No. I've been to a bunch of places were we used to hang out, haven't found anything yet."

Yoshi sounded tired and worn out, possibly a combination of being woken up early and having to deal with such an emotionally charged situation right away.

"We're here now," Naoto told her. "So, if you want to, you can head back home and relax."

There was a quick pause, before Yoshi replied.

"No. I am already out here. I might as well keep helping."

Naoto smiled ruefully. Naturally, he would drag the kindest people down with him.

"Thanks Yoshi."

"Yup. I'll keep you posted!"

With that, Yoshi hung up, leaving Naoto with ambiguous feelings in his chest.

What was the point of all of this? Why did Nagatoro do this? What was Hayase trying to pull?
"Are you okay?" Maki asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

"No, not really. I was almost out."

"You still are," Maki reassured him. "This doesn't mean you've regressed in any way. This is not you. This is her. And I am not saying that in a hostile way either. She clearly needs help with something."

Naoto nodded, leaning slightly into the gentle squeeze of Maki's hand.

"D-Do you think..." Naoto stammered, a little concerned about his own ideas at times.

"What?" Maki pushed, her narrowed with curiosity.

"Maybe Sakura has any ideas?"

"That's pushing it, I think."

"Yeah."

Naoto and Maki stared at each other, neither of them comfortable with the prospect of informing Sakura about what they were currently doing. Still, what if there was some insight the woman had, that the two of them were lacking? What if Nagatoro had somehow deemed her the one person to get in contact with? That seemed wildly out of left field, almost unbelievably so, but hey, stranger things had happened around them.

Naoto groaned loudly and opened his phone again. Maki palmed her face and shook her head.

The wait for the call to be picked up was agonizing.

"Naoto?" Sakura's voice eventually seeped from the speaker. "What's up?"

"Hey," Naoto opened weakly, not really having taken the time to considering how to go about explaining this. "So, uhm, I could use your help with something."

"But?"

God. She needed to stop being so sharp.

"It's relating to Nagatoro."

"No."

Naoto winced at the immediately strike against him. There seemed very little in the way of room for debate.

"Liste-"

"No," she repeated again. "I am not letting you do this to yourself. Stop."

"It's not for me!" he protested, hoping for her to just hear him out. "She's missing!"

"Huh?"

That seemed to have grabbed her attention, which Naoto quickly took advantage of, to tell her same thing he had told Sakura. Once he was done, Sakura remained quiet for a while longer, most likely taking the time to absorb everything.

"Fuck."

Naoto blinked a handful of times, quickly glancing at Maki to confirm she heard that as well. The woman held the weakest poker face Naoto had ever encountered.

"Why is she always causing trouble?" Sakura questioned on the other end of the call. "I'd tell you to just let her get swallowed up by the ground, but you wouldn't listen, would you?"

"Nope."

Sakura sighed. "You are such a pain, Senpai."

There was something strange about hearing himself be referred to as such once again, in a rather long time, by Sakura, without a hint of teasing to it. It sounded like she genuinely held him in high regard, which felt so wrong to him.

"So, what am I supposed to do about this?" Sakura asked, her voice tinged with annoyance. "Like, I'll help, but only for your sake."

"We were wondering if you would know of any spots she might hang out in, Like, place she liked, places she'd go to, in order to think."

Sakura scoffed incredulously on the other end. "You're joking, right?"

"W-What do you-"

"Naoto! Art room! Come on!"

Naoto slapped his forehead.

Of course.

"Thanks Sakura!"

"Just don't do anything stupid," she added quickly. "Please."

"I won't,' Naoto lied, before hanging up.

Maki tapped her foot impatiently. "Heard that. Makes sense. We should go."

"Yup," Naoto agreed and the two began running toward the school.

It was a surreal experience, to be taking these very same steps, running through these halls one more time, looking for the trouble that he had always tried to avoid as a younger man. The memories flooding his mind were trying to drag him down, to slow his pace, but he would not fall victim to it.

Behind him, the loud steps of Maki, pushing him ever onward, provided him with a sense of security. As long as he wasn't alone, he would find a way to manage.

The moment he reached the door to the art room, he feared any hesitation would ruin him. Thus, he immediately slammed it open, without any care for what the consequences might have been.

Yet, despite the anticipation and anxiety in his heart, the room turned out to be empty. Not a soul was to be found within these walls.

Naoto let his hand limply slide down the door and to his side. Had they been completely wrong this whole time?

He took a couple of hesitant steps into the room, inspecting each inch of the place, hoping that Nagatoro would simply materialize if he gawked hard enough. The longer he tried, the more it appeared to be nothing more than wishful thinking.

Maki appeared by his side, letting out a soft sigh. "She's not here Naoto."

Naoto's shoulders drooped as he walked over to the window to stare outside. This view, which he had once been so intimately familiar with, now seemed so disconnected from him as a whole.

This room used to mean the world to him. It once was like a second home, a bastion of hope, where he could retreat to in the time of need. Even when it wasn't, akin to the last time he had been here with Maki, at least it had some sort of effect on him.

Now, it was nothing. It held no meaning.

Naoto smiled. He wasn't sure why, but smile he did.

The room no longer held him in its iron grip, as it had for so many years. He no longer needed to hide in it, to avoid the struggles in his life. It no longer hurt him, the way it had when he considered all that had happened here, all that it would build to.

It was just a room now.

Naoto spun on his heel and approached the canvas, set up in the middle of the room. It was empty, blank, ready to be shaped by the mind of one able to fill it with life. This was no longer him; it would never be him again, not to the degree that it used to be. But in this moment, he felt happy to see it, like an old friend, greeting him once again.

His gaze fell onto the corner of the canvas. He cocked his head, realizing that there was a white paper, blending in almost perfectly with the canvas backdrop. Naoto reached for it, realizing it was a neatly folded up note.

Opening it filled him with a strange sense of wistfulness that he couldn't explain. It was as if his mind already knew the words written upon the paper, before his eyes had to read them.

Hello Senpai.

If you found this-

No. I am sure you did. I am sure you went looking for me and eventually made it here.

That's just who you are.

I am sorry for making you chase me like this. I don't even know why.

Selfishness, I guess? If you're reading this, that means you cared enough for me to actually come after me, despite how stupid I've been. That makes me happy. It fills me with so much joy.

But it also hurts. It hurts so much that I want to cry. Cry until I can't breathe anymore.

I love you Naoto. I always have and I always will.

But I hope you stopped. I hope whatever love was left in your heart for me has crawled in a hole and died. I don't deserve your love.

I was weak. I was so incredibly stupid and weak.

Here's the part where I make excuses, if you couldn't tell.

Humor me. Please.

I was a stupid brat. A young, dumb, mess of a brat. I crushed on you, almost immediately. I know I treated you so harshly at first, and even that, I can't apologize enough for. But my feelings for you were always so intense. They burned so brightly, it felt like I was being scorched from the inside. I just wanted you to pay attention to me.

But my mind, my mind has always been a fickle thing, you know? I never told you. I couldn't. It wouldn't let me. I just wanted to love you, but it kept pushing me to go further, to do more, to make you unable to think about anything other than me.

I knew you had the potential to be someone so special the moment I met you and so did it. It wanted to devour you, to have you all to itself. And I couldn't fight it, because I agreed. I wanted the same thing, for once in my life.

So, I loosened the reigns. I let the voices influence me, because I thought, just this once, we were working together toward the same goal. To love you, to make you happy. Even if I was a little more off the walls than usual, as long as you knew, by the end of it, how much I cared about you, it was alright.

I could have never predicted what was going to happen.

Naoto, you are the first person I ever loved. You were the first time I had ever experienced such unbearably intense feelings. I had no idea how much my mind would fray. I thought I had it under control.

I didn't.

I hurt you.

I couldn't stop it, I couldn't fight back, I couldn't put it back in the cage.

I let it loose and it broke everything.

No excuses I make will undo the damage I have done. I am not trying to gain your pity, or forgiveness.

I don't want you to love me.

I just want you to know that I, Hayase, would have never hurt you.

Please. I beg you.

That is all I ask of you.

Just know. I would never.

Tell the others I am sorry. Tell them that without them I would have fallen apart so many times.

Maki especially, has always been there to stop the voices. She's always managed to push back when I was so close to falling off the deep end.

Tell them I am so sorry that I lost the fight, that I gave up control and disappointed them.

But now, we both have to stand on our own.

You're doing fantastic.

That concert was the greatest thing I've ever seen. The way you bared your soul, the way you spoke to each and every person in that room, it took so much courage, so much strength. And you absolutely nailed it.

I am so proud of you. You will make it; I am sure of it. I don't know if I can keep up with your music after this, but I know it'll be outstanding. Don't ever doubt yourself.

You became such a bold, confident man. I know you can't see it, but I can. We all can.

I'll do my best as well.

I want to find a way to shut the voices out, permanently. I want to know who I would be without them. I wonder who Hayase could be, without Nagatoro. I wonder if she would be someone suitable for you.

Not that it matters.

I don't want your love anymore.

Please, just be happy. Whatever that means to you, pursue your happiness.

If that means, being with Maki, then I am sure she will care for you and love you for the rest of her life. That's just the sort of loyal, big cat she is.

Naoto. Senpai.

I love you.

Take care of yourself.

Goodbye.

Naoto read the letter a few more times, just in case anything changed about it, but it never did.

Hayase was gone.

Where to? He had no idea and that was now very much intentional on her part. In her desire to protect him from herself, she had made the choice to leave her life behind.

Naoto let his hand fall to his side, tightly clutching onto the letter. Maki behind him, having shown enough restraint to not read over his shoulder, looked on edge.

"What did it say?"

Naoto turned toward her, his face being an unreadable mess of emotions. It scared Maki, to be unable to gleam even an ounce of understanding from his expression.

"She's gone," he spoke softly.