thank you for reading and reviewing! and thanks always for your patience. this year just keeps throwing stupid stuff at me and the people i love ugh.
based on most of your comments, I think you will be happy with this chapter :)
disclaimer: I own nothing
"Is it okay for a pregnant woman to be here?"
Rory folds her lips to control the laugh that wants to come out. She looks at Jess - her usually strong, tough man - where he sits on the tattoo chair with the sleeve of his graphic tee rolled up. Since taking a seat in the chair, Rory has noticed some nervous behaviors that give her the idea this is not a painless experience for him.
Blair, the tattoo artist, pauses where she is cleaning his arm for the tattoo to be drawn. Her eyes shift over to Rory, and they share an amused look.
"Men ask the dumbest questions sometimes," Blair teases before returning to her task, "like we come from another planet."
Now, Rory can't hold in her entertained chuckle.
"I think he just doesn't want me to see how painful this actually is for him."
Jess turns to Rory but doesn't address her statement.
"You mean you're not from mars?"
The side of her mouth perks up, and she shakes her head.
"Don't you mean Venus?"
"Right," he nods his head and gives her a charming grin, "that makes more sense, since you basically are Venus."
His eyes roam down to her curved stomach, which has popped much earlier than in her last pregnancy. She shakes her head again and turns to Blair.
"And now he's sweet talking. He must really squirm a lot."
"I squirm a regular amount," he defends himself, sitting up straighter in the chair. Blair laughs loudly.
"It's okay, dude. Men are much worse at this than women."
"Yeah it's okay, Jess. We have periods and childbirth and all that," Rory shrugs, offering him a playful smile, "your pain threshold is probably much smaller."
"I would never argue against the fact that you're stronger than me," he replies, and tries to hide a wince as Blair turns on her machine, "but I can handle this."
"Right."
"He definitely squirmed a lot with the first one," Blair reveals as she inches herself closer to his arm. He glares at her.
"You didn't even do the first one."
"No, but Brandon gave me a heads up," she smirks, "told me to go gentle on you."
He rolls his eyes and leans his head back in the chair. Rory smiles and steps closer to him, placing a supportive hand on his other arm.
"I assume the first one was for a kid?" Blair asks, and Rory looks at her face to see that she's become much more serious and professional as she prepares to start the process. A sweet smile graces his lips, and he opens his eyes again to give Blair a nod.
"Yes, her name's Persephone. We call her Persie. She'll be one in just a few months."
"That's unique, very cool," Blair replies, eyes trained on his arm, and she lifts the needle to his skin, "and this one is your birthday, Rory?"
She grins and meets Jess's eyes. As Blair starts the tattoo, she catches him flinch. He gives her a nervous look, and she decides not to call him out on it. Instead, she squeezes his shoulder with care.
"Yes, this one is mine. He's been wanting to get it since Persie's but being new parents and all, it's kinda hard to find the time."
"Aw, where is she today? You could have brought her."
"She started crawling recently and now she never wants to stop," Jess explains with a small smile of pride on his face, "Didn't want to risk her either having a fit because she can't crawl around or escaping our grasp and having her end up with tattoo ink all over her."
Rory and Blair laugh, and Jess meets her eyes again; he looks much more relaxed.
"Plus, we have a doctor's appointment today," Rory further explains as she rubs a hand over her stomach, "our friend Paris is watching her for us. We figured we would take advantage of it and get this done. We're going out to lunch just the two of us after this too."
"Nice, sounds like a lovely day you two have planned. How far along are you?"
"About four months."
"So, you're due in, let's see, August?" Blair guesses, looking briefly at Rory as she wipes a towel over Jess's arm. He grins.
"Yes. Due August 15th."
"Wow two birthdays so close together. And Rory's is in October."
She laughs, "yep and Jess's is in July."
"I never realized that," Jess smirks at Rory, "we'll have to plan the next one out so it's birthday is in September."
Her eyebrow raises, "we already have an anniversary in September. Maybe November."
"You gonna get another tattoo for your August baby, Jess?" Blair asks not taking her eyes away from her work. He winces as she hits sensitive skin.
"If I make it through this one."
"You're doing so great," Rory enthuses, giving him a quick kiss on the head.
"What gave you the idea to get dates tattooed?" Blair questions, and Rory realizes she's trying to distract him from the pain. He tilts his head to the side.
"I don't know. I'm a writer and a reader. I love words. But…I couldn't come up with anything just right or concise enough to get tattooed that…captured all my feelings about our daughter's birth. Or about starting a family with Rory," she notices that his face softens as he tells Blair, "I've loved her for a long time."
His candid words make her eyes water, and she squeezes his shoulder again. He turns his head just enough to place a quiet kiss on the top of her hand.
"Ah, I get it," Blair smiles softly, "I think it's sweet. And getting Rory's birthday tattooed too. So sweet and much classier than a name in my opinion."
They all laugh.
"Yep and if it somehow doesn't work out between us, he just has to find another woman with the same birthday as me."
He looks up and gives her a half-glaring, half-incredulous look. She smirks.
"Well, numbers are pretty easy to change or write over, so no pressure, Jess."
He turns his glare on the tattoo artist now.
"I'm teasing. You guys seem like a very solid couple. And we are almost done, by the way."
Jess grunts quietly as she puts finishing touches on his now raw skin. Rory gives him a sympathetic smile.
"Do you know what you guys are having? Or are you going to wait to find out when the baby is born?"
Blair asks more questions, surely aware of the dull pain Jess must be feeling. He swallows and shakes his head.
"We don't know yet, but I think we're going to try and find out today."
"Yes, as long as the baby doesn't hide itself, that's the plan," Rory adds on with an excited smile. She and Jess share another loving look, but it turns into laughter as her stomach growls loudly.
"It's crazy, I expected this pregnancy would be so different from the last. But so far the only difference is that my morning sickness ended earlier, and the relentless hunger started sooner."
"I don't know how you do it. I cannot imagine dealing with that," Blair sighs and then nods towards the back of the shop, "there's a break room back there, you should see a door near the bathrooms. There are a ton of snacks, please help yourself."
"But he's almost done, I don't want to leave him yet."
"Go grab a snack, it will take you two seconds. You won't miss a thing," Blair promises. She looks at Jess and he mouths the word 'go' to her.
"Okay. I'll be right back!"
She turns and walks swiftly towards the bathroom area, eyes searching for the promising door that has food to hold her over until lunch. Usually, she has the baby's bag with her that she always keeps snacks packed in for herself. But of course, she left that with Paris, even though Paris was offended that Rory thought she wasn't prepared to babysit a nine month old. She soon finds the door and pushes it open to reveal a room with tons of snacks, just as promised; she starts salivating as she spies spicy Doritos and double stuff Oreos. First, she picks up a banana, so she can tell Jess she ate something healthy. As she eats it, she notices there are pictures all over the wall - of clients with their tattoos and tattoo artists. Her eyes scour the photos with a grin, enjoying people's creativity with their bodies. It's not something she would ever feel comfortable doing to herself, but she admires the commitment. She gasps as she sees the familiar face of Brandon, holding out his forearm to show a tattoo of a black rose that looks like it's sprouting from his wrist. She knows that by now, his arms are almost completely covered, and so it had to have been from a while ago. She looks down at the snacks and opens peanut butter crackers up next, then goes back to perusing the photos. Finally, she finds Jess - and Doula is in his picture too. He has one side of his body facing the camera, his hand holding up the sleeve of his shirt to reveal his tattoo - just a hint of a smile on his face. Next to him, Doula is holding her hair up to show her pointe shoe tattoo; she has a huge grin on her face, and she is on her tiptoes as though she's pretending to be in position.
It makes Rory smile wider, because she knows that now Doula has been accepted into dance programs at both NYU and Adelphi University. And no matter what choice she makes, she's going to be dancing and she's going to live closer to them - a fact that Rory knows makes Jess (secretly) very happy. She also knows that he's relieved she didn't get into more intense programs like Juilliard or SAB. He had confided in her about Doula's scary behavior last summer after Thanksgiving, when he noticed that Doula didn't eat dessert. And though it turned out that she actually just wanted to go to her girlfriend's house for dessert, Jess still keeps an eye on her whenever they're together, and Rory does too.
She bites her lip as she looks at the picture, desperately wanting a copy for herself. Her eyes wander around the space, looking to see if there are cameras, or people, around that she didn't notice. When she finds nothing that could catch her, a small mischievous smile grows on her face as she leans forward and plucks the picture from the wall. She then deftly picks another picture near the bottom and moves it to the empty spot. Feeling exhilarated, she forgets to grab the other snacks she wanted as she stuffs the photo in her purse and speed walks out of the room.
"There you are," Jess greets her with a relieved looking grin, "I'm all done."
"Really?! I missed the end?" she pouts as she walks up to him.
"It's okay, she didn't put the bandage on yet," he stands up from the chair and turns his arm to her. She covers her mouth in delight as she sees the numbers for her birthday, and in between them are little sphere shapes that look like a planet.
"I love it! It's beautiful, but I thought you were doing coffee beans?" she asks as she grazes a finger around both her and Persie's birthdates; Rory's sits on top, with Persie right underneath, and still room for more. She looks to his eyes when he doesn't respond. He smiles and leans forward, pressing his lips just under her ear. He whispers,
"I changed my mind. Because you're my world."
She gasps softly and playfully hits him on the shoulder,
"Oh Jess, you can't say things like that to a pregnant lady. I'm about to cry."
"Go ahead and cry. I'll wipe your tears."
"Okay now you're just trying to make me sob!"
He kisses near her ear again.
"Rory, I love you."
The words feel electric as they breeze over her skin, and her eyes do start to water. She sniffs back her tears as he pulls his head away to see her face. She presses her lips to his briefly.
"I love you too, Jess. Thank you for this."
"Thank you for making my life feel a million times more meaningful than it did before I had you. And a daughter, and another baby on the way. There's no one else I would ever want to do this with."
She puts fingers under eyes, looking towards the ceiling as she tries to keep the wetness from seeping out.
"You're going to have to carry me out of here if you don't stop. I'm not going to be able to see through the tears in my eyes."
He smiles. He moves a hand over her small bump to cup the bottom of it, "let me get this bandaged up and we can go get some lunch in your bellies."
She wipes her eyes and then reveals a happy smile to him.
"That is actually the most moving thing you've said to me today."
"I don't know why, but I cannot believe we're having a boy!" Rory exclaims in awe in the car later that day; she holds up the new sonogram they received from the doctor, so it's lit up by the sun in the windshield. A short but deep laugh comes from Jess in the driver's seat. He reaches out and squeezes her thigh as he navigates the city towards Paris's place.
"You worried he's going to be like me?"
Her jaw drops along with the photo, and she turns to him abruptly. But she finds a teasing smirk on his face that makes her relax.
"I hope he's like you, Jess. I hope he's exactly like you in every way."
His face softens slightly but the teasing smile remains.
"Every way? Even pulling pranks on the unsuspecting townsfolk in Stars Hollow?"
She laughs and settles back in her seat as she lifts the sonogram again.
"As long as it doesn't hurt anyone, absolutely. All of it. I love all of you. I'm excited to have a little you. I just…didn't expect it for some reason."
"Or maybe he'll be like your grandfather," Jess mumbles sentimentally, calling her attention to him again. As he pulls up into an empty space outside of Paris's house, he turns to look at her.
"I haven't forgotten. That you want to name a boy after him."
Her eyes water for about the tenth time that day; she unbuckles her seatbelt and leans across the armrest to hug him around the neck.
"Baby, watch your stomach," he mutters against her hair. He gives her a kiss there and gently pushes her back.
"It's not that big yet," she argues half-heartedly as she wipes her eyes, "and we have time to talk about the name. But thank you, for remembering and for bringing it up."
He nods and lifts her hand in his to press his lips to it.
"Come on, let's go get our girl."
They walk up to the door and knock loudly to announce themselves before pushing the door open. As soon as they enter the home, they hear familiar laughter coming from down the hallway. The parents turn to each other to share a smile.
"I guess someone had a good time without us."
She quirks an eyebrow, "you thinking about leaving her here longer for some more free time?"
He laughs but shakes his head; he reaches for her hand, and they walk towards the sound.
"Missed her too much."
Rory follows happily, adoring his words and his mood. When the doctor told them they're having a boy, Jess was just as excited as he was when he found out about Persie. And he said similar to words to Rory after the doctor left the room - that he will cherish their son for the rest of their lives, that he wants to give him the life his parents could not give him.
They reach the living room and find Paris and her children playing on the floor with Persie. Paris looks up at them.
"Oh good, mom and dad are back. I can get up off this damn floor."
As she stands up, Persie looks up and sees Jess and Rory; her face brightens as she squeals and immediately starts to crawl towards them. Jess gently lets go of Rory's hand, and with a joyous half smile on his face that meets his eyes, he drops down to the floor just in time to meet his daughter where she's crawling at his feet. He picks her up in his arms and places loud smooches all over her, making her erupt in rapturous giggles. He holds her up in front of him and her eyes move to Rory; she gives a big smile and kicks her legs. Jess smirks and holds Persie's face close to Rory's so she can give her a kiss.
"I guess someone missed us too, huh?"
"I wish you had come fifteen minutes sooner," Paris interrupts the family's reunion, "could have saved me changing another diaper."
Jess's smirk turns mischievous, and he looks at the baby.
"Oh, did you make it extra messy for Aunt Paris just like I told you? You did, didn't you," he blows a raspberry on her neck, "I'm so proud of you."
Paris rolls her eyes and Rory laughs.
"So, did you two find out what you're having? Besides another mini menace," she asks, throwing a look at Jess.
"Mom, I'm going to walk over to Mark's so we can work on our biochem project," Paris's now sixteen year old son yells as he walks towards the front door. Paris fixes him with a look.
"By 'biochem project' you don't happen to mean you're going over there to vape, do you?"
Tim sighs, "no, mom. No vaping. Just lots of cocaine and tequila."
"Well, I suppose those kind of count as natural substances," Paris quips back, "seriously, Timoteo. Do not vape. And remember that if you don't ace all of your midterms, you can't go to comic con."
"Yes, mother dearest. Bye."
Paris waves him towards the door and turns back to Rory and Jess, who look half-entertained and half-confused. She crosses her arms over her chest and shrugs.
"He's definitely going to vape. But he will definitely get an A on his project, so I guess I can't be too picky."
"He's definitely going to vape. He's totally afraid of alcohol," Paris's daughter tattles over her shoulder as she walks out of the room.
"Oh, so those were jokes?" Rory asks in confusion.
"Of course, you think they would be my kids without a dry sense of humor?"
Rory laughs somewhat nervously and shrugs a shoulder, "just checking. We're having a boy by the way."
"Really?" Paris asks, sounding as surprised as Rory felt, "I didn't know the Lorelai's could make boys."
"Well, my great-grandmother did, obviously," she argues, suddenly sounding a little touchy. Jess turns a quick but inquisitive gaze on her.
"Okay then," Paris mutters, "anyway, it's interesting that the universe decided we need another Jess."
Jess smirks, "he'll be half-Rory. And yes, I'm thrilled to find out what that mixture is like in a boy."
"I'm imagining him as someone that will slap your hand before giving it a kiss."
Roy rubs her hands over her stomach and bites her bottom lip as Jess and Paris continue to throw jabs back and forth, lost in her own thoughts. She's then pulled to the present by the sound of Persie crying.
"She shouldn't be hungry, we just fed her a little while ago," Paris insists in her usual intense tone. Jess looks down at his daughter and gives her a pout.
"Is someone tired? Or just wants attention?" he kisses her cheek, and then turns to Rory, "we should get going before this becomes a full meltdown."
Rory nods once and crosses her arms over her chest; Jess looks her over.
"You're not going to stay for coffee? I made decaf just for you," Paris asks, annoyed look on her face. Rory opens her mouth but doesn't say anything. Paris turns her look on Jess. He looks Rory over again as he hoists the crying baby up higher on his body. Rory meets his eyes, and his look softens.
He asks Paris, "Did she nap at all?"
"A short one. Sorry, my kids were busy entertaining her."
"Okay," he nods and turns his soft look back to Rory, "why don't I drive around with her? She loves sleeping in the car lately. Let her get a nap in, and I'll come back and get you? So you can have coffee with Paris. And if Paris really is your best friend, I'm sure she has snacks waiting for you too."
"I do. A variety of croissants from a French bakery down the street. I helped the owners get their dream baby so every time I go in there, they give me at least a dozen pastries."
The shoulders that were creeping up towards Rory's ears drop, and Jess knows he's figured out exactly what she wanted. She looks between Paris and Jess and asks,
"Are you sure?"
"Yep. I'll put The Smiths on, and she'll be out like a light. And I get to drive around listening to some of my favorite songs. It's a win for all of us," he reaches a hand out to grasp her gently on the arm. He leans forward and kisses her head, "I'll be back."
He picks up the baby bag off the floor and turns to exit before she can question him again. Paris turns slowly and scrutinizes her body language with hard eyes. Rory crosses her arms tighter across her middle. Showing some human understanding, Paris leads her to the kitchen where a French press of decaf coffee and a plate of delicious looking pastries awaits them. She pours Rory a small mug of the hot beverage and pushes both that and the whole plate of pastries towards her. She then places her hands on the counter and leans towards her with squinted eyes as she demands,
"Talk to me, Gilmore."
Rory takes a small sip of the coffee to buy time, but she can feel Paris's relentless gaze on her. Finally, she meets her friend's eyes, and the worries that have been whirling in her mind and her stomach meet at her mouth. She puts the coffee cup down and reveals a nervous frown.
"I'm having a boy," she inflects, her words falling from her mouth like she's finally confessed a heavy secret. Paris only squints harder.
"And?"
"What if I don't know what to do with a boy?!"
"What-"
"I didn't grow up with boys. It was always just me and mom!" her voice escalates, and her words get closer together as she begins to spiral, "what if I ruin his life? Or give him terrible advice or, or dress him stupidly and he gets made fun of at school?!"
"You have Jess too, you know."
"I know I do, and that's the other thing - I don't want to let him down either! He is such a good dad, an amazing girl dad. He's a natural! It's not fair to him if we have a boy and I'm not as good with him as he is with Persie."
"Oh my god, I hate the term 'girl dad'. Since when did we decide to applaud men for treating their daughters well? That's basic parenting, it's the bare minimum!"
Rory ignores her rant to continue her own,
"I don't know what they like, I don't know what I'm supposed to teach them or not teach them. What do they do besides sports and video games? Do I need to start liking sports? What do they do for fun?!"
"Well, when he's older he will probably vape and masturbate like my son."
"Oh my god Paris, ew! Don't say that, that's so inappropriate!"
"I'm sorry but that is one thing you should know. Boys are pretty gross," she shrugs, and then she softens her hard look and promises, "but honestly Rory, there is no difference in terms of how to successfully raise him. You do exactly what you do with Persie."
She gives her friend an uncertain look and admits,
"I just don't know if I trust my instincts. It's always been Gilmore girls for me, and mom."
Paris sighs and turns to her actual coffee pot to pour herself a cup with caffeine. As she turns back, she's faced with Rory's big eyes, coffee cup in the air and a little pout. Paris rolls her eyes and grabs the pot of regular coffee, pouring her barely a quarter cup of it.
"That's all you get. I'm not in the mood to face overprotective Jess."
"Thank you!" Rory enthuses with a sip. She places her mug down and rubs her stomach, "I think he loves coffee."
"Well, he is half of you."
Rory softens and looks down at the counter.
"I hope he's all Jess. Some Luke too," she moves hair behind her ear and looks up at Paris with the beginnings of a smile on her face, "definitely like my grandfather."
Paris nods slowly, reading between the lines of her words: she doesn't want him to be anything like her biological father. She sips her coffee and looks Rory over with a look of discernment that's a mix of her usual intensity, but also a gentleness.
"Part of your personal story is avoiding generational trauma, right?" Paris finally asks, and Rory doesn't know if she's referencing her memoir or her personal knowledge of her life. Either way, the statement intrigues her, and she cocks her head. Paris continues somewhat impatiently, "you know, not ending up with a baby with a man who is a rich colossal idiot, I mean you narrowly avoided that, but you did. Not having a bad relationship with your mother. I'm just saying, I think it makes sense for you to have a boy."
Her friend's words soothe something in her brain, and the excitement she feels for having a little Jess begins to overshadow the fears. She looks down at her bump and then back to Paris with a small smile.
"So…no difference you say?"
Paris laughs dryly, "I said there's no difference in what you should do. You just love him and be there for him like I know you both will be. But, like I said, boys are definitely grosser than girls. And mine is oblivious to anything his eyes are not directly on. There's definitely something lacking up there. Common sense maybe," she gestures to her head, "but, really Rory. You have nothing to worry about. You and Jess are great parents."
She swallows, "you think so?"
"I do," Paris asserts with a strong nod, "you've got the maternal instinct thing. You always have. It will never let you down. And Jess…well, as much as I like to tease him, he's a very impressive father. I wish the fathers I meet in my line of work were at least half as good and attentive and caring as him. Hell, a lot of the times the father only shows up for the first appointment. Then I never see them again until handing the surrogate baby over. Even gay couples, there's often one who is less involved."
"Neil Patrick Harris?"
"You know I can't say," Paris states, and then she looks upward in thought, "and by the way, with you and Jess as his parents, I don't think he will be a sports person."
"Hey, Jess likes basketball!"
"Okay, and I like cake. That doesn't make me a baker."
"Hm. Guess I can't argue with that logic."
Rory lifts her coffee mug for a sip, and places it back down with a relaxed sigh.
"Now that my freak out is over, what's new in your life?"
Paris shrugs a shoulder, "Not much. I'm seeing someone."
"Oh?"
"And by seeing someone I mean sleeping with him. On my terms. On my schedule. In hotel rooms only, that he pays for. Occasionally we go to overpriced dinners first."
"Ah. Well, I'm happy for you, Paris."
"Thanks. He's pretty average size, but he's not intimidated by the toys I bring to bed so that more than compensates for it."
Rory blushes and stutters, "Oh you know I better see where Jess is at."
Paris rolls her eyes as Rory takes her phone out.
"He said he'll be here to pick me up in ten minutes."
She looks up from her phone and sees Paris pushing a large pistachio croissant towards her. She licks her lips and gladly takes it. Just as she picks it up to take a bite, Paris states,
"He's about that length."
She grimaces and drops the croissant on the counter. Paris grins smugly and shrugs a shoulder.
"Not too bad right? Definitely not that girth though, god that would be painful. And ugly."
"I've completely lost my appetite."
"If you had to compare Jess to any pastry-"
"Oh, I think I just heard him beep for me. Bye Paris! Thanks for everything!"
...
"I know, I know. You're tired," Jess mutters against Persie's head as he opens the car door, "it's exhausting having fun, isn't it?"
She continues to cry as he puts her into her car seat. When he lifts up the straps to buckle her in, her cries turn into deafening screams. He grimaces as she kicks her arms and legs, twisting and turning her body as she tries to push herself out of the car seat.
"It's okay, it's okay. We're going to go for a ride. You love riding in the car now, remember, sweetpea?" he takes one of her hands in his and leans into the car to kiss her head. With this contact, her cries soothe slightly. He keeps his mouth there, mumbling calming words to her until he thinks he's pulled her back from the depths of a meltdown. Slowly, he pulls away and goes to buckle her in, but immediately the screaming tears return. His heart is tugged as she reaches her little fists out towards him, uttering a "D" sound through her sobs as though she's trying to ask for him.
"Oh Persephone, you're breaking my heart," he croons as he lifts her back out of the carseat and into his arms, "you want daddy? You've got me, I'm all yours. It's okay."
Her sobs settle as he snuggles her close to his chest; her small arms rest near his neck, as though she's trying to hold him close to her too.
"I'm all yours, Persie," he repeats his promise in a tender mumble against her head, "you'll have to share me when your baby brother comes, but it's just you and me, my little girl, until then. That's nice, right? It will be a special bond between us, always."
He stands in the open car doorway holding her like this; enjoying the moment, with plans to transfer her to the car seat when she's asleep. But as he looks down at his sweet girl's face, her ocean blue eyes drooping closed with her plump cheek pressed against his chest, he realizes he doesn't want to separate from her either. He hums quietly in time with the surging love in his heart, his thoughts on both his first child in his arms and the one on the way; he feels the sun heat his back as a cloud parts in the sky above. He steps back and closes the car door gently. Then he walks to the trunk of the SUV, popping it open and carefully pulling out the baby carrier. He maneuvers the now sleeping baby in his arms, strapping the gray contraption around his body. He gently tucks her little legs into the holes and then moves her arms from his neck to strap it up top. Once it's all clicked into place, he looks down to make sure she's still asleep; he grins and locks the car before embarking on a stroll around the neighborhood with his bundle of love strapped to him.
He takes in the greenery and the old buildings in Paris's side of town - a much more upscale area than he's ever lived in. He passes other parents on the sidewalk, cringing slightly at the clearly luxury brand strollers, and kids' bikes that look like they cost as much as his and Rory's car. It's much different than any place he lived as a kid. It strikes him then - the silence of the neighborhood. As though it's completely separated from the rest of Manhattan. Nothing like the sound of trains, traffic, and neighbors fighting that he grew up around. He turns when he sees a sign for a park, feeling a little unsettled by the absence of noise and hoping to find more life here. But it turns out to be a dog park, and suddenly it's much more noise than he wanted. He pivots to a street of shops and cafes. There are a few people dining outdoors, taking advantage of a warm Spring day. He passes a table of people that look towards him, and he can tell they probably want to make comments about how cute Persie is or how good of a dad he is; he crosses the street immediately.
On the other side of the road, there's a school with a young boy and an adult in front of it. As he gets closer, he hears the kid being scolded for getting in trouble at school. He frowns, glancing at the boy that is probably no older than eight; he has a sour look on his face and stands staunch in his attitude. Jess takes a breath, the scene bringing up more childhood memories. He gets a funny feeling in his stomach and decides maybe he needs to talk to someone too. He pulls his phone from his pocket and easily finds Luke in his recent calls list.
"Hey Jess. Or should I say Tommy Lee?"
"I have two tattoos. I'm hardly Tommy Lee."
"That's two more than me."
"Maybe you should get some. Bet Lorelai would love to see her face on your arm."
"Don't you dare give her any ideas."
"Bradon's got plenty of connections if you need one."
"Did you call me to annoy me?"
"Yes. And…no."
Luke pauses.
"Well…what's going on? You okay?"
"Yeah, I'm good. Rory had her four month appointment today."
"Jeez, four months already? Feels like it's going by so much faster than Persie."
"I feel the same way. And she's actually eighteen weeks, the appointment was a little delayed. It's blowing by," Jess laments with a happy sigh, "anyway, we were able to find out what we're having."
"No kidding? Technology is wild to me."
"We all know that," Jess smirks and then clears his throat, "we're having a boy."
"Oh wow," Luke replies, and Jess can hear a smile in his voice, "congratulations, Jess. To you and Rory. And Persie too. I'm sure she'll love having a little brother to boss around."
He chuckles, "thanks. It's pretty cool."
"It is. And Rory's excited?"
"Yeah. But I think she's feeling…a little surprised too. Maybe nervous."
He hears Luke take a breath on the line, and his voice sounds closer as he replies in a quiet tone,
"I can understand that. It's always been just her and Lorelai. But she'll come around and realize that she's an amazing mother. Doesn't matter if it's a girl or a boy."
"Yeah. She is amazing."
Luke clears his throat, "and you, Jess? Are you feeling…maybe nervous?"
"I'm excited."
"I know, I don't doubt that. But you can be both excited and nervous. Are you?"
"Of course, I'm always going to be nervous when it comes to bringing a kid into the world. You know that."
"Right."
It's quiet on the line for a minute. Jess walks mindlessly around the block; he glances down as he walks to check that Persie is still asleep. He grins to himself at her serene, sleeping face.
"I guess…" he starts in an uncertain voice, "I always imaged it would be only girls. Even in my actual dreams it's only been girls."
Luke listens silently, but when moments pass without any follow up, he says gently to Jess,
"It's okay to say that. It doesn't mean anything bad. You love Rory, you probably pictured…little Rory's."
He turns the corner again and takes a breath.
"Yeah. I think that's exactly it. I imagined having girls, because I imagined they would be just like Rory," he pauses and then confesses, "and I'm imaging boys to be just like me. Basic gender association, I guess."
"Ah, I see," Luke mumbles in a way that Jess can tell he's nodding, "but…it doesn't really work that way."
A subdued chuckle rumbles in Jess's throat.
"No. I suppose it doesn't."
"I see you in Persie already, you know."
"It's the hair."
"No, no. Well, yeah - your hair is identical. But in her little…baby personality as well. I love playing with her whenever I get the opportunity, but she's perfectly content on her own too. Sometimes completely ignores me to play by herself."
"That's Rory too though…"
"Jess, you might be the only person I've ever known that has said you don't need anyone else, and I actually believe it. That's what I mean. I think she's going to grow up with that strength and confidence too, I really do."
"Thank you, but I still think that's from both me and Rory," he then asks, trying not to show his wariness, "do you think the universe is going to give me a son exactly like me?"
Luke pauses.
"I don't know what you mean by that question."
He huffs, "you know what I mean. A sarcastic pain in the ass, getting himself into trouble, pretending like he doesn't have feelings. Alienating family and friends. You know, a…tough kid, like I was."
"Jess, you weren't a bad kid."
"I could find more than one person that would disagree with you on that."
"Listen to me," Luke says sternly, and it catches him by surprise, "You were not a bad kid. Do you hear me?"
He swallows and mumbles in response, "I hear you."
"And I hope you know I've never ever thought of you that way, Jess."
"I know."
"Good."
"I don't mean to sound like I'm not excited," Jess says after a few pensive moments of silence, "Because I am so fucking thrilled, Luke, and I love him already. It's just that, I know when I was a kid and a teenager, there really wasn't a lot that people could say to me to change my mind about anything, particularly myself. I don't want that for him. Or Persie of course."
"Listen," Luke sighs, "I don't think there is such a thing as a bad or tough kid. I think there are troubled kids, misunderstood maybe. Definitely neglected kids. You had to deal with a lot growing up, a lot that you should not have had to deal with."
"My son will never live like that. He will never know what it's like to feel neglected or abandoned, in any sense," Jess insists in a serious, hushed tone. He knows he doesn't need to tell Luke that and is aware that this is a proclamation more for his own ears. And it's clear that Luke gets that as he replies softly,
"I know, Jess. That's exactly what I'm saying. Even if he is a…troublemaker, you're going to love him anyway and you're going to be there for him no matter what. I know that for sure."
"With all of my heart."
"Exactly. He'll have you, and Rory. And me and Lorelai. I promise to be there for him, for all of your kids. In ways that I wasn't there for you."
"And all the ways you were there for me too. I know," he mumbles kindly in response. His phone chimes, and he pulls it away from his ear to see a text from Rory.
"I have to go save Rory from phallic commentary."
"From what?!"
"She's with Paris," he explains quickly, as he heads back towards her house.
"Say no more. Please. I'll talk to you soon. And Jess?"
He comes to a halt in front of a flower shop and says, "yes?"
"You're an incredible father already, have been since the day your daughter was born. I hope you realize that too."
He stops breathing for a second, unprepared to hear words like that. As he finally exhales, he replies in a soft and sincere tone,
"I learned from the best. And I don't mean Jimmy," before Luke can get a chance to reply to that, he quickly ends the call with, "thank you. Bye Luke."
He hangs up and waits a beat before stepping inside the flower shop. He looks around for something pretty enough, and smiles when he sees a bouquet of different colored roses, remembering Emily's insistence that 'roses are the flower for love'. He picks them up and takes them to the register. He pays and leaves, holding the flowers in one hand away from the baby, while his other hand texts Rory to say he'll be there in a minute.
As he gets closer to the house, he sees the front door open,
"Bye Paris!" Rory shouts as she hastily walks out and down the steps.
"Our son is going to want to be a fighter pilot when he grows up."
She stops in her tracks at the bottom of the steps, surprised by seeing him there - on foot and with Persie strapped to him. She smiles but tilts her head.
"Huh?"
"Because of how fast you're walking with him in there," he teases, reaching a hand out to ghost over her belly, "he's going to feel a need for speed."
"You did not just quote Top Gun!"
"I know he's a nut, but Tom Cruise does have some good films. Eyes Wide Shut changed my life."
"That is such a guy thing to say," she shakes her head. When her eyes land on the bouquet in his hand, she smiles impishly, "what do you have there? A gift from a woman fawning over you with your, nice, strong arms, and your devilish grin, and the cutest baby in the world on your chest? Did she think you were a sexy single father?"
He laughs, then gives her that devilish grin.
"It's for the only woman I ever plan to have babies with," he holds out the flowers, "but Kate Hudson is taken, so I figured I would give them to you."
She gasps indignantly and playfully hits him on the arm; but it happens to be right where his tattoo is, and he sucks in a breath through his teeth.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" she clasps a hand over her mouth. He shakes his head with a chuckle.
"It's okay, I deserved that," he holds the flowers out once more, "these are for you."
Her mouth opens, "for me? Why?"
He shrugs a shoulder breezily and looks at her with that beautiful intensity that she loves, "Because I'm excited to be growing our family. I'm grateful to you for putting yourself through pregnancy again. And just because…I love you Rory."
She takes the flowers and holds them to her heart with a watery grin.
"I love you so much, and I love these gorgeous flowers," she steps close to kiss him on the cheek, "I'm thrilled that I can give us another baby. I mean, the first one turned out so great!"
He smirks, and remembering something then, she smirks too.
"I have something to show you!"
"The sonogram again?" he teases as she unzips her purse, "do you need me to show you which part of the picture indicates that he's a boy?"
She gives him an unamused look before digging through her bag.
"No," she argues, pulling out the photo from the tattoo parlor and handing it to him, "look! I have another picture."
With a smile plastered on his face, his jaw drops.
"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, did you steal this?"
She gives him a coy look, "It's a picture of you and Doula, so it's not really stealing…right?"
"Oh, it's definitely stealing," he taunts and taps her shoulder with the picture, "I'm relieved to know that if our kids are delinquent it's not just from my genes."
"Okay, book thief!"
He laughs and reaches out for her free hand, walking them towards the car.
"First a yacht, then this photograph," he teases as he gives her hand a loving squeeze, "what's next, Bonnie?"
She playfully rolls her eyes but gives him a clever grin.
"Just your heart, Clyde."
They reach the car and stand at the side of it. He reaches out to move her hair behind her ear and gives her a smile.
"It's been yours, gave up the rights a long time ago," he winks and moves a hand to splay across Persie's back, "made a little change in ownership over the last year, though."
"Oh really?"
"Uh huh, now the words 'property of Rory and Persie Gilmore-Mariano' are inscribed right here," he points with his free hand to the space on his chest where his heart is, right beneath where Persie's snoozing head rests. Rory's grin grows along with the current of love in her heart. She reaches out and places her hand on top of his on their baby.
"I'm thrilled to share ownership with her."
He eyes her with a softly imploring look and asks, "And our son?"
Her big smile softens sentimentally. She nods once, deep and slow, in response.
"And our little boy, of course."
"Speaking of little boy, Connor is on spring break this week from school. Liam said he's hanging at Truncheon today. Thought maybe we could go pick him up and take him to do something fun. What do you think?"
Thinking about Connor makes Rory realize that she and Jess already do sort of have experience with a son. And she understands more thoroughly how right Paris was, that all they need to do is love and care for him and the rest will fall into place. She grins even wider at this recognition, and as she meets Jess's eyes, she can tell that he's having similar thoughts; his gaze soft and his lips arched slightly upwards. She reaches out to push his shirt sleeve up, and surprises him with a gentle kiss beneath the bandage over his fresh ink. She pulls back and they share a warm smile. Her hand glides down to lovingly squeeze his arm as she replies,
"I think that sounds like a perfect ending to a perfect day."