Chapter 12. On this day we say goodbye.

A/N: Can we JUST take a moment and collectively ooh and ahh over the name of this chapter—on this day we say goodbye. Isn't it SO romantic? I literally fell in love with it after I learned of it from YouTube (it's a song by a Japanese singer named Aimyon. Recommend 10/10).

That's all. I just wanted to highlight this beautiful phrase. Did I mention I love it? It's the BEST. BEST!

Standard disclaimers apply.

I rang the doorbell, but no one answered. I rang again.

Still nothing.

Tentatively, I pushed the door. It opened a little, a wordless invitation to enter.

I should've left and gone back to the inn, pretending to go on with my life.

But I couldn't. Not after discovering that the people who had driven my father to his death shared the same last name as the man I trusted with my heart.

Seta.

It had to be a coincidence. Soujirou was from the States. These people, a seta Keisuke and Hanako were local. There can't be a connection.

So what was I scared about?

I stepped inside, my voice barely a whisper. "Ojama shimasu."

The room was small and dim. The windows were sealed with newspaper and an old heater stood in one corner, fighting a losing battle to the coldness. In the center, three people sat at a dark-stained table.

An older man in his late forties, with a defeated face and protruding stomach. He stared at me like a deer caught by headlight. This must be Seta Keisuke.

"Who are you?" The woman, Seta Hanako, rose from her chair and asked in a shaking voice. Her apron, once blue, had faded to a near-white from too many washes, a reflection of her general state—exhausted and barely holding it all together.

I didn't answer. Because I saw him.

Seated in between them, inn gray sweatpants and a beige sweater, and looking out of place was the man I thought I knew.

Seta Soujirou.

"Soujirou," My voice trembled, the necklace he gave me burning like like icicles against my skin. "What are you doing here?"

His expression flickered. "Kaoru..."

Hanako looked between us. "You're not with the moneylenders? Are you…a friend of our son, miss?"

The air stilled.

"Don't call me that!" Soujirou snapped, his voice sharp.

Son.

I stared at him. The man who comforted me, made me laugh, and held me. The person I wanted to find happiness with. He couldn't be their son.

It wasn't possible.

"Soujirou…she said you're her son. That's not true, right?" I searched his eyes, holding my breath.

He looked away, all but confirming the blood relation.

"I see." I forced a smile, ignoring the sound of my shattered heart. I reached up, removed the necklace, walked up to the table, and placed it on the table, the delicate stars glinting like tiny daggers.

How could something so beautiful hurt so much?

I turned toward the entrance. "Ojama shimashita."

"Kaoru, wait!" I heard a chair scrape to the floor.

I paused and when I spoke, it sounded eerily calm to me.

"My father is dead because of them. You knew. And you fed me lies to stop me from finding your parents. It was my mistake to trust you, but it's over now, Soujirou." I looked him in the eyes and said, one word at a time. "On this day, we say goodbye."

He started following me, but his parents clung to his arms.

"You can't leave us." Hanako wailed. "The moneylenders will be back soon. They'll kill us!"

Keisuke pleaded. "You have to save us! You're our son! Our only son!"

"Kaoru, please!" Soujirou cried.

But I was already gone.

My legs moved out of habit, not will.

All I wanted to curl up on the sidewalk and let the winter take me, but I walked.

One step at a time. One foot in front of the other.

The winds cut at my cheeks, but the pain was nowhere near what I felt inside.

I thought I had found someone I could trust. And that happiness was within reach. Spring would come.

But it was all a façade.

In this city, winter was the reigning king.

Was this my punishment? For turning away from revenge too easily? For letting grief soften when I should've held onto it with both hands?

I had tracked down the people who blackmailed my father—who drove him to despair—and when I finally stood in front of them, I didn't demand justice.

I walked away.

Worse yet—I let the son of these people into my heart. Blinded by his easy demeanor and swayed by his sweet words. I allowed him to lead me astray.

What was I doing with my life?

What had I done?

Something warm slipped down my cheek.

And just like everything else in my life, I could only watch myself cry in silence.

Up ahead, the warm glow of the inn spilled softly onto the snow-covered street. A place that once felt like a source of happiness was now only a cruel reminder of my naivety.

I couldn't stay here anymore, not with the memories of Soujirou around every corner.

Sae-san looked surprised when I placed the room key on the counter, dragging my suitcase behind me.

"You're checking out?" She asked, her brows furrowed in concern.

"Yes." I bowed. "Thank you for taking care of me for these past few months."

"But where will you go, Kaoru-chan?"

"Wakkanai." I replied, referring to the northernmost edge of Japan.

Remote. Frozen over. The end of the world. It was perfect.

Sae-san blinked. "Then why don't you stay a few more days? A snowstorm is supposed to come later tonight."

I shook my head. If I stayed any longer, the city would swallow what little remained of me.

Sae-san stepped out from behind the desk and walked me to the door. "Please come back and visit sometime. I will miss you." She squeezed my hand warmly.

I nodded, but I knew I was never returning.

I glanced back one last time as the bus pulled away, watching Hakodate blur into a haze of wind and snow.

Goodbye happiness.

A/N: I love drama lol. Now I really need to finish that paper due tomorrow XP

Please note the wordplay here-Wakkanai is really a city in the northernmost tip of Japan, but the pronunciation also sounds a lot like "I don't know."

Japanese phrases you probably already know:

Ojama shimasu-Used when entering someone's house as a polite greeting. Basically means 'I will disturb you.'

Ojama shimashita-Used when leaving someone's house as a polite farewell. Basically means 'I've disturbed you.'

Updated: 4/23/2025 1:46am EST