Like Knives

by Arith1234

Ellie and Joel come across an unlikely ally that neither wanted nor realized they needed.

111. Chapter 111

Chapter 111: Misuse Oh

'I told you from the start…I disappear when it gets cold …But you found a way to keep me here…With a body to hold.'

-Ethel Cain, Misuse Oh

Author notes: I just want to forewarn my readers that this chapter deals with a lot of dark themes I don't gloss over. I feel like it wouldn't be faithful to the story to censor it. I also feel like the standard code of life would no longer apply. I mean, there isn't a judicial system. I couldn't even imagine mental health. Joel's therapist in the show needed her own therapy in my opinion.

Anyway, this story is about to become really heavy.

'What the hell is going on here?! What happened to my husband?!'

Becca closed her eyes and sighed when she heard the shriek wailing voice. She would recognize that voice from a mile away. She would've been a happy woman to not hear that voice for the rest of her life.

She watched as the woman pushed through the throng of onlookers. She fell down upon her knees as Ezra was coming to. She rolled her eyes and sighed. She hoped he would've stayed down longer. She was losing her edge.

'Good to see you're still around Hannah.' She placed her hands on her hips as she narrowed her eyes down at them,'Or should I give ya my condolences for sticking round as long as ya did?'

Hannah's eyes widened as she stared up at Becca,'When did you become so cruel?' She looked down at Ezra, who was holding his profusely bleeding nose,'Did you do this?'

'Yeah.' She nodded,'And I'll do it again.' She narrowed her eyes and pointed down at her brother,'You were supposed to be dead! Why are you here?'

'We came here to help you!' Hannah shook her head as tears or anger fell down her face,'To warn you! And this is how ya repay us, Rebecca?'

Becca stared at her incredulously. She wanted to smack the living daylights out of her. After everything they've put her through. She had witnessed everything Ben and David did to her. She encouraged the abuse. She didn't blame her. For what could she do? She was abused as well.

They were both trying to survive. The only difference between them is she got out. She managed to stop the cycle of abuse. She could see the downtrodden look in her eyes. The young woman looked malnourished and exhausted. She looked just as she did when she first came to Jackson Hole.

Afraid and alone.

Becca looked over at Ellie holding Matty. Tears filled her eyes and she shook her head sadly. The last thing she wanted was for her son to witness violence. Especially by her own hand, but she did it for reasons he didn't understand yet. Hopefully, one day she will still be alive to tell him.

Betsy managed to get Ellie and Matty away from the crowd. She met Becca's gaze and gave her a silent nod, reassuring her she got the kids. She wouldn't know what she would do without that woman.

Maria stood next to Joel and looked up at him, seeing an unreadable look on his face as he carefully watched the scene unfold in front of him,'I thought ya would be the first one to have a crack at him.'

'Don't think I haven't thought about it.' He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed,'This is her business. Her…family.'

He hated saying the last word. He knew she didn't feel that way towards them. This was her chosen family. He would be damned if he got in the middle of it. He knew she wouldn't appreciate it.

Maria nodded as she looked up at him in surprise. A few years ago, he would've been gnawing at the bits to beat the living shit out of Ezra. He very well may get the chance, but he's gotten more patient in his older years.

He's learned to choose his battles. She could see the fire burning behind his eyes though and his teeth gritting. That Joel was still inside him, urging to be let loose. He's done a good job of managing his anger, but God forbid the next person who crosses him. Especially when his wife or kids are concerned.

It's why she killed Tommy. Regardless of how much she loved him, she knew his ideologies were dangerous. She didn't want to live in the kind of world he wanted.

'Warn us?' She shook her head and frowned,'What the hell do ya mean that? We can take care of ourselves here.'

She watched as Hannah helped Ezra pull himself up. She held him up by his arms as he held onto his busted and bloodied nose. A small smile formed on her face as she watched the blood trickling from his nose. She's wanted to do that for so long. Probably since she was a young girl.

For the longest time, she used to hold her brother in the highest regard. She would look up to him as being a pillar of light. Just like her father. It was only until she was older, she realized Ezra was just like her father. He used and abused her body just like every other man who came into her life. They used abuse under the guise of love and religion.

Joel had been the only man who never treated her like an object. He actually listened to what she had to say. He took an interests in her hobbies. He wasn't just her husband or lover. He was her best friend, probably the closest friend she's ever had.

She would be damned if she let this son of a bitch come along and ruin it. He was someone she thought she gotten rid of long before the outbreak. He was her greatest shame. He was coming here to ruin everything.

Ezra managed to pull himself up. He groaned as Hannah kept a firm hand on his lower back. She was glad to see no one else in town went over to help him. She was fully expecting to be arrested or hung. She wasn't worried about that. The new council didn't scare her. She knew Joel and Maria had her back. She had friends. They could always leave here.

Suddenly, Joel's proposition was starting to look better and better.

Ezra stumbled on his feet as he took a step towards her. That's when Joel decide to step behind her. He knew she could handle her own and he could see the way her hand was behind her back on her pistol. He smiled to herself. Atta girl.

He wouldn't intervene unless he had to, but he had his hand on his pistol on his hip. His finger was on the trigger just in case.

He didn't trust this guy. He saw the way she defensively had her arms crossed over her chest. Her entire body was tense. She had an uneasy look on her face. He didn't like seeing that. She was so happy in Colter Bay. Happy and relaxed. He wanted her to be like that all the time.

Damned this motherfucker for coming here and trying to ruin it.

Joel took a moment to carefully study him. He was tall and athletically built. He could tell he used to be handsome, before war and hard living got to him. He could see the resemblance between him and his Becca, but their personalities were starkly different. He could see the inherent goodness in Becca, but he didn't see that in Ezra. On the outside, he seemed nice, but it was fake.

Over the years, Joel's become a very good reader of people. It's why he's survived as long as he did. This dude was up to something. It was written all over his face. Judging by the wary look on his wife's face; she felt the same way.

He sighed as he saw all the onlookers gawking at them. He didn't like airing their dirty laundry out in the streets like this. He knew they would love that. He would be damned if they were given something new to gossip about.

Maria looked at Joel's face and could easily read his mind. She grasped his arm and leaned in close, whispering,'We should take this somewhere private.'

Joel nodded and narrowed his eyes, whispering to her,'I agree. This ain't no one's business but our own.' He sighed,'And if your boyfriend the Sheriff or anyone else tries sending her to the jailhouse? As much as I like Rich. I'll blow his brains out.'

Maria stood between Becca, Ezra and Hannah. She held her hands up out between them to try and diffuse the situation. The last thing she wanted is another blow up. They were already dealing with a lot going on in town. They missed a lot these past four days. She had a lot to fill them in on, but they had bigger fish to fry.

Maria averted her eyes between them and sighed,'Let's take this to the church.'

Becca looked up at Maria and had to laugh at the irony. She wondered where Ellie had went off to. She thought Betsy would've taken Matty and she would stick around. She's been going off on her own a lot lately. She couldn't imagine how she must feel with Abby running off with Owen and Mel.

She always had a bad feeling about that crew. Something seemed off with them, but Ellie had become close with them. She didn't know if her and Abby were in a romantic relationship and she never asked. She was an adult woman and entitled to her own decisions. Regardless, they had become close. She's lost far too much at such a young age.

Becca kept a close eye on Ezra and Hannah as they walked to the church. Maria and Joel walked along opposite sides of her, almost as if they were afraid she was going to fly off the handle again. She didn't like the way Ezra approached her husband. She was fiercely protective over him. Just as he is of her.

Joel slid his hand in hers and tangled their fingers together, just as they've done thousands of times before. Even before they were together romantically. The first time she did it was when they were first traveling to Jackson. He begrudgingly grabbed her hand to help her cross some scaffold. She thought he hated the sight of her. He saw her as cargo and an unneeded nuisance.

When he pulled her out of that burning building, he felt the spark when he first laid eyes on her. She was so frightened and angry. He kept his distance from her. He didn't want the attachments.

Looking at her now, he couldn't imagine a life without her. If he were to lose her, it would end him. He would lose the last shreds of his humanity. He would want nothing but vengeance. He wouldn't be able to raise Matty alone. He wouldn't be able to do anything but avenge her death.

He shook his head of those thoughts. It's the last thing he needed to be thinking about right now. He wasn't going to lose her.

They got to the doors of the church and Becca stopped at the top of the steps. She frowned when she saw Rich standing next to Maria. She tensed up and felt herself drawing inward as she crossed her arms over her chest.

She watched as Hannah held a handkerchief up to Ezra's nose. She felt the bile rising up in her throat as she looked at him. He didn't deserve any sympathy. The only reason why she didn't put a bullet in him is because she didn't want to go to the gallows. She didn't want to lose her family. She also wanted to make sure she got enough information out of him as possible before they killed him.

She knew one thing for certain, he wasn't leaving Jackson Hole alive. Not after everything he's done to her. He destroyed her life. He let daddy…Daddy encouraged her brothers to…

She shook her head, ridding it of those thoughts. Peter would call it a minor setback and say it's normal. She never told Joel of these things. They were the deepest and darkest secrets she was ashamed of. Peter just started to reach the surface of those locked memories she shoved deep down to the recesses of her soul. She even suppressed a lot of it. She would share these things with Joel though. He deserved to hear them from her before Ezra opened his big mouth.

She was afraid if Joel knew, he would either look at her differently or want to kill Ezra. Maybe a little bit of both. He said he came to warn them about something. She didn't trust her brother. He was a liar and a manipulator. She didn't trust a damned thing that came out of his mouth.

Joel followed Becca's line of sight. He squinted his eyes at Rich,'Rebecca ain't comfortable with him staying.'

'Someone gotta stay and keep things in order.' He sighed and stared at Joel desperately,'No offense, but Rebecca just punched someone.'

'My asshole brother.' She glared at Ezra,'He's had it coming for years, Rich.' She sighed and shook her head,'Maria will be there. We'll keep it clean.'

In the church at least, She thought to herself.

She still wasn't convinced he didn't know where they lived. He still could've been apart of the smear campaign against her. She always swore to herself if any of her brothers managed to be alive, she would make sure they lived to regret it. She wasn't that meek little lamb anymore. She realized she had immense inner strength. She was brave and capable.

Joel always told her to get mean whenever she got scared. She was tough. She was afraid once she started pummeling into him, she wouldn't be able to stop.

God help his soul.

Joel placed his hands on Becca's arms and rubbed them up and down soothingly,'If Becca doesn't want ya there. Then it's the way it is.' He stared at him dead in the eye, leaving no room for argument. He shrugged,'You're my friend, man, but this is…between family. My wife and her brother.'

Ezra placed his hand over his heart as he held his bloodied nose with his other hand,'Family. That warms my heart.'

Joel narrowed his eyes at the scrawny little dick and pointed at him,'We're gonna have a few words. Just me and you. Ya can believe that.'

Ezra's eyes widened slightly as he looked at Becca. She crossed her arms over her chest and just shrugged. He was on his own. For once, she was actually in agreement with violence. Not yet though. They needed him for information.

'You must be the famous Joel Miller.' His eyes roved him up and down as he crossed his arms over his chest,'I gotta say. The stories they talk of you are the stuff of legends. I heard you've been a Firefly, Hunter and a Raider. You're a killer, robber and a Mercenary. They say you can rip a man apart with his bare hands.'

Joel had an unreadable expression on his face. He towered over her brother. He made the calculations in his head quickly. It would take him no more than fifteen seconds to kill him. He could break his larynx in half, break his neck or his windpipe. He wanted it to be slow. He didn't like him. Not one bit.

Joel may have done awful things in his life, but he's come to the realization he did it to survive. He wasn't proud of what he did. He was ashamed of it and felt guilt for it. PTSD. Patty compared him to a man who's been through war.

Joel crossed his arms over his chest and narrowed his eyes,'You keep talking to me like that, young man and I'll show ya what they say bout me.'

Maria's eyes widened. She hasn't seen this side of Joel in a very long time. He's been calmer and more reserved lately. He was at peace. Then here comes this son of a bitch to ruin the sanctity. Who the hell was she kidding? Jackson was a fantasy. They were never going to be safe.

'That's enough.' Maria sighed,'We're here to talk and get to the bottom of things.'

Hannah frowned as she averted her eyes between them,'How can we talk like this in a place of God?' She stared at Becca incredulously,'You used to be such a good follower, sweet Rebecca. Why have you let this man sway you from God?'

Joel's eyes widened incredulously. This woman was like some fucking Stepford wife. She wore a scarf around her head and a skirt that went down to her knees with stockings underneath. She wore a high necked collar and a sweater. He didn't understand how she could be covered up in such warm weather.

He remembered Becca being dressed like this when he first met her. He recalled her telling him of wearing the same scarves. The women in their congregation were only allowed to show their hair to their husbands. When they got married, they gave up their vanity. He remembered her telling him that on the porch when she was cutting his hair. He couldn't believe someone would cover up something so beautiful. He remembered telling her that too. It was the first time he ever got to touch her, smell her and hold her.

It was the first time he really knew she trusted him. He would be damned if he let this snot nosed punk ruin her spirit. He didn't give a damn if they were in a church. Rich wouldn't be able to get in here quick enough.

Becca glared at Hannah as she pointed her index finger at her,'Careful, don't talk about my husband that way.' She leaned in close to her, whispering,'You wouldn't like to hear about the things I have to say about your dear husband.' She looked over at her brother and felt sick to her stomach,'I can say what I want in a church house. Your husband's done far worse in one. Tell her, Ezra. Have you told her everything you've done, my sweet brother?'

'Look who's talking.' Ezra shook his head and smirked,'Little Preacher's daughter ran off and married some white trash lowlife just to spite the family.' He sighed,'It made mama real sad to see your face all over the news. Does your husband know you're worse than him?'

Joel narrowed his eyes and started walking over to him, but Becca placed her hand on his stomach, whispering to him,'Don't. He's not worth it.'

Ezra laughed uneasily and swallowed harshly,'Relax, no one's here to fight.'

His southern accent sounded like Becca's, but was a bit more pronounced. He looked to be an all American boy, but there was something lurking underneath the surface. He angered Becca, but she also feared him as well. That didn't sit right with him. He didn't like to see her afraid. He already wanted to rip this guy's throat out.

Maria placed her hand on Rich's chest and her eyes softened up at him,'You can stand outside and if…anything goes wrong y'all be right here.'

His girlfriend seemed to pacify him for the moment. He nodded and rubbed her shoulder,'Okay, but if I hear one gunshot go off.'

Maria nodded and smiled, patting his chest,'Of course. One gunshot.'

Joel bit back a smirk. Only a year in and he was already pussy whipped. Then again, he said he would never be that way either. It only took about ten years. He was still stubborn and hard headed though. Until the day he dies.

Joel pushed through the double doors of the church and let Ezra and Hannah walk in first. Maria and Becca followed behind them. He met Rich's eyes warily.

Rich swallowed harshly and leaned in close to him, whispering,'Between me and you. That guy and his wife are…creepy. They're way too religious, man. Quoting scriptures and end times shit. They're scaring the kids with their self righteous talk.' He looked at Ezra,'The way he talks about her Becca?' He scrunched his face up in disgust,'That shit ain't right.'

That had Joel's attention. He looked back, making sure no one was watching them.

'What do ya mean by that?'

Rich sighed and shook his head,'He said she was supposed to be the…chosen one, but she ended up…abandoning the flock. Whatever the hell that means.'

Rich looked over his face and frowned,'Everything okay, man? With Abby, Owen and Mel leaving.' He sighed,'There have been more infected seen on patrols.'

Joel nodded silently as he listened carefully. He thought about the infected deer they saw on the trail during their honeymoon. Everything had been too happy, peaceful and perfect. Would those four days be the only peace they'll ever know?

Rich looked over Joel's shoulder into the church, seeing Becca standing closely by Maria,'His wife seems…younger. Becca doesn't seem like a fan of him.'

He knew exactly what he was talking about, but he wasn't about to divulge that information to him. It was Becca's business.

Joel looked back into the church at his wife. He eagerly bounced on his heels. He didn't want to be standing here. Not when his wife needed his support.

He turned to Rich and frowned,'Ya have him near the ranch or my kids?'

'No. Maria made sure of that.' He met his eyes and nodded,'We wouldn't do that. We kept him and his family separated from the rest of our group. Maria said it was for quarantining purposes.'

Joel sighed and patted his shoulder,'I'll talk to ya in a bit.'

Rich nodded as he stared warily into the church. He watched as Joel walked over to his wife. He met Maria's eyes and they both shared a knowing look. There was another storm brewing. They could feel it.

It seemed like they missed a lot being gone these last four days, but he wouldn't allow them to regret it. They needed the alone time together. It seemed like any time they got any semblance of peace, this shit happens.

They needed to get away from civilization as far as possible. Fuck Colter Bay and California. He would take her and the kids someplace infected would never roam. Least populated areas. Colorado, Mexico or some place higher up in the mountains. Wyoming wasn't safe for them anymore. Jackson felt like purgatory.

Joel placed his hand on Becca's lower back and leaned in close to her, whispering,'Ya doing okay?'

'Ask me that later.' She sighed and shook her head.

She gritted her teeth as she took a step closer to Ezra and placed her hands on his chest, pushing him forcefully,'How dare you! How fucking dare you! You made me think you died! You left me there to fuckin die!'

Joel's eyes widened at the ire in her tone. He's seen her angry, murderous and stark raving mad, but never like this. She looked at Ezra with so much hate and contempt. He hoped to never be on the receiving end of those looks.

His woman could be so soft and gentle. She was warm and sexy. She loved him so good. She was everything good in his world. He didn't give a goddamn about anyone else's. They were through with trying to redeem themselves for their past sins. What's done is done.

She could also be very lethal. Especially when her family is concerned. He recalled the way she beat Tess to death with a slab of concrete. She had the bravery to do something he couldn't. In a lot of ways, she was stronger than him.

Ezra took a step forward and held his hands up in defense,'Regardless of what you may think. I really do come in peace.' He looked over at Joel and held his hand out to him, giving him a warm smile,'We haven't had a chance to properly introduce ourselves. My name is Ezra Willoughby Bennett.'

Joel stared down at his hand and laughed,'I'd move that hand away lest ya don't want it broken.'

Ezra's eyes widened slightly as he took a step back from him, knowing he wasn't bluffing. He held his hands up and nodded,'Okay, I respect that.' He averted his eyes between Becca and Joel,'You went and got married again, huh? I thought you were done?'

She placed her hands on her hips and sighed,'I was done marrying boys. I found a real man to marry. Not that it should matter to you. I don't have to explain myself to you. One more fucking word about my husband and I'll…I won't be responsible for his actions.'

'I also don't like people speaking for me.' He cleared his throat as his gaze softened on Becca, but she could hear the firmness in his tone.

Regardless if she was his wife or not, he wasn't stupid and didn't like to be treated as such. He spoke mighty fine. Especially when he felt as if he were being slighted.

Becca frowned as he walked past her. He briefly met her gaze and she truly didn't know what was running through his mind in that moment. He didn't seem angry with her. Maybe a little pissed. He was right. She shouldn't have spoken for him.

He was going to have words with her later too. He didn't like to be slighted. She appreciated they didn't hold things back from each other. They may have some long drawn out arguments sometimes, but they always work things through. They never go to bed angry or wake up the next morning mad at each other. Even if it's unresolved, they'll talk things over with their marriage counselor.

He was going to have a field day with this one.

Ezra was coming along and fucking things up. She didn't like this. It felt as if something were about to erupt. She could feel it slowly boiling to the surface. The infected were closer out than they should. The deer could've been another virus, but the fear was still in the back of her mind.

Joel grabbed Ezra's arm and jerked it slightly,'Ya been the one stalking my wife? How ya know bout me and her?'

Becca didn't dare interject this time around. She wouldn't disrespect him like that. They were a team. Hell, they've killed for each other. There were bones buried all around Jackson to prove it.

Ezra's eyes widened up at him and he looked over at Becca,'You gonna let him treat me like that? You found another abusive husband?'

'He can do what he wants.' She narrowed her eyes at her brother,'For the record?' She placed her hand on Joel's chest,'This is the first man who's ever treated me with decency and kindness. With respect. That goes for you too.'

'He's old enough to be your father.' He shook his head in disbelief,'What would our father think about this?'

Joel couldn't contain his rage at that. The mere implication like he was anything like them burned him up. He didn't like the comparison. Not one bit. He wasn't nothing like them. He would kill himself before he ever hurt her like that again.

He grabbed Ezra by his collar and lifted him up. He sneered as he pushed him back against the wall, yanking on his collar,'Ya got another thing to say?' He leaned in close to him,'You talk to her like that again and a broken nose will be the least of your worries.'

Hannah's eyes filled with tears and she shook her head,'Why are you doing this to us?'

'To you?' Becca's eyes widened incredulously,'We've been keeping our business. I left Silver Lake and never looked back. I…found a home. A family. I'll be damned if I let you take that away from me. You have no idea the trouble your husband has caused. The things he's done and let be done to me.' Tears filled her eyes at she stared at Hannah,'You of all people should know. You were what? Fourteen when Ezra took ya from your parents and made ya his wife?'

Hannah cowered at her words. She hugged herself and took a step back from her, shaking her head,'It wasn't like that. Mama and daddy knew it would be safer with Ben and the congregation.'

'Safety.' Becca snorted,'Were we safe when we were freezing to death up in that church? When David had us give ourselves up in offering? Thinking God would save us from…this?' She held her hands out,'Look at us. We're in a church and God still isn't here. God had us killing and eating our friends and family. Ya saw what David did to us in the name of God. To me?'

Tears fell down her face and she angrily wiped them away. She hated they were seeing her tears. She said to herself if she was ever given the opportunity to face someone from her past, she wouldn't cower. Yet, what did she do? She groveled and sobbed like a baby.

She shook her head and sighed, keeping her focus and anger on Hannah,'You saw what David to me. How he stood me up in front of his followers day after day, humiliating and…' She pointed to Ezra, who was still being held firmly against the wall by Joel,'This man you married is worst than David. Ya knew what daddy did. You fucking knew. After he died, what did ya do? You…just continued where he left off. You were my brothers. You were supposed to protect me.'

Joel closed his eyes momentarily and took a deep breath, muttering under his breath,'Jesus.' He pushed his arm against Ezra's neck more firmly, gritting his teeth,'I'm gonna fuckin kill ya.'

He knew of what her father did to her. She was just beginning to open up about what her brothers did to her. He affirmed what he's already known. It made him sick to his stomach. It was pure and evil perversion. There wasn't another way to get around it.

It wasn't just a statistic in the South. It was something that ran rampant. Religion and oppression make people desperate and…curious. They'll look for anyway they can get it. Some use it for control. Every man in her life had used and abused her body.

He was going to kill this scum bag. Slowly. He would torture him to death and then feed him to his hogs. He would cut his dick off and shove it in his mouth. He would make Hannah watch. He would even let Becca watch if she wanted to. She could participate if she felt inclined. She deserved that right.

Ezra struggled for air as he pushed harder against his neck. He weakly gripped at Joel's arm, whispering gaspingly,'You don't understand.'

'Oh, I do.' Joel kneed him in the groin, causing him to groan as he struggled to breathe,'I understand that ya making my wife upset and I take that mighty fuckin personally.' He shoved his knee into his groin again as he looked over at Hannah,'Ya kids know their daddy's a rapist?'

The tone of his voice was eerily calm. Maria knew it's when he was the deadliest. He was weighing his options. Being inside a church house mattered none. She had to admit, she wouldn't call her boyfriend right away. This fucker deserved to be roughed up a bit, but she didn't want anyone else to die.

Maria sighed and tentatively placed her hand on Joel's back,'Let him go. We need him alive for information.'

Hannah stared desperately at her husband. His face was purple as he gasped for air. His eyelids were fluttering shut. She sighed as she tried reaching out for Joel,'Please stop. Please.'

Becca jerked her arm back and pushed her away,'You don't touch him.'

Joel stared back at Becca, a smirk forming on his face. He couldn't lie, it made him feel good in how she was defending him to her brother. She wasn't ashamed of marrying him. She didn't give a damn what anyone said about it. He always wondered about that, if she were settling for him, but the deadly tone in her voice let him know he had nothing to worry about. He never did.

Maybe he was an egotistical and selfish bastard, but it made him feel pride in knowing that. God, he fucking loved her. After this was all over, they were getting the hell out of here. They'll raise their family in a goddamned cave in the mountains if they had to.

Becca's eyes locked with Joel's and she nodded slightly, whispering,'Maria's right. We can't kill him…yet. We need to see what he knows first.' She looked back at Hannah, who was being held back by Maria,'I won't leave their kids without a mother.'

She didn't blame Hannah for what happened. Not really anyway. She was a scared fourteen year old girl. David had killed her parents, leaving her vulnerable. She was forced to marry Ezra, a man old enough to be her father just to survive. They ate her fucking parents at the reception. David had her prepare them.

Those images started to flood her mind. She started to get woozy as all those emotions came flooding back to the surface. All she wanted is to see her baby. She wanted to see Ellie and her flowers. They should be home on their farm getting ready to have lunch.

Joel saw the tears in Becca's eyes and the pleading look on her face. He let go of Ezra, dumping him unceremoniously onto the ground with a thump. Hannah ran over to him and fell down on the ground as she frantically checked over him.

The anger he felt towards Ezra was pushed to the side for the moment. His wife needed him right now more than anything. He looked down at the sniveling and groveling mess on the ground. He wasn't going anywhere for the moment.

Joel held her face in his hands and gingerly lifted her head up to look at him,'You okay?' He looked over her face, seeing the anger, but also the fear,'Ya want me to kill him.' He nodded curtly,'Just say the word.'

She didn't know why she found that to be sweet. Maybe because she knew he would do it. The scariest part is she wouldn't care either way.

'He said he came to warn us.' She sighed and shook her head as she looked over at him warily, whispering,'I'm really sorry.' She saw Maria standing by them and frowned,'I'm sorry.'

'What do you have to be sorry for?' Maria shrugged,'They're the ones who came here starting their crap.'

'Cause of me.' She sighed,'They're not done with me.' She stared up at Joel,'I told you.'

He sighed and brought her to his chest, resting his lips against her forehead,'Ya don't gotta be sorry for a damned thing. Ya didn't do anything wrong. They had no right showing up here like that. Ya can do what ya want.'

He wrapped his arms around her tightly. She tried to be strong all the time, but she didn't always have to be. It was about time she put up a fight for herself when it came to her family.

Ezra managed to sit up as Hannah wrapped her arm around his shoulders. He looked up at Joel and Becca and the tender exchange between them. He seemed to be good to her. He loved her. She seemed to care and love him too. She certainly didn't act this way with Ben or David. Then again, they didn't treat her this well either.

Maria gave Becca and Joel a minute alone together. She walked over to Ezra and Hannah, crouching down in front of them,'I told ya they're protective of each other.'

Hannah scoffed and shook her head,'A little bit too much so.'

Maria resisted the urge to roll her eyes at the young woman. She didn't like her whole trad wife gimmick. She wore prairie dresses and scarves covering her head all the time. She respected everyone's beliefs, but she quoted scriptures all the time. She was too self righteous and thought she was better than everyone else.

She couldn't have been more than twenty two years old. Becca said she was fourteen when she married Ben. That was sick in so many ways. It wasn't their business, but she didn't want their beliefs bleeding into the community.

'They love each other.' Maria narrowed her eyes,'Their marriage is built on mutual love and respect.' She snorted,'She was also well over age when they got married. Not that it's any of your business. If I woulda known ya were into child…brides I woulda locked the gates and sent ya on your way.' She laughed,'Ya played the cool little act of being the loving brother. You're lucky I held Joel back. I may not be around next time.'

Ezra sniffled and winced as he felt the blood rushing up to his nose. He kept his eyes focused on Becca and Joel. He saw the way Joel held her. The way his large hands ran up and down her back. He sneered to himself as he kissed her forehead and whispered something to her. She closed her eyes and leaned into him. His blood ran cold as he saw the pleasure on her features. She was enjoying his touch. She was welcoming it.

His hands clenched into tight fists at his sides. He felt jealousy. Just as it did whenever he saw daddy, Ben and David touching her. She was his. She belonged to him. No one else.

Hannah saw the predatory look in her husband's gaze locked on Becca and Joel. She felt her heart sink to her stomach. Regardless of what people may think; she isn't naive to the ways of the world.

Becca looked over at Ezra still on the floor,'What are ya gonna do with him?'

'Gonna take 'em to the jailhouse.' He nodded,'Have Rich keep an eye on the fucker til we know why he's really here.'

'What about Hannah?'

'We'll keep her in the quarantine house for now.' He stroked her cheek,'Ya wanna go home?'

She nodded as she swallowed harshly,'I just wanna see my baby.'

Tears filled his eyes at her words. He sighed and cupped the back of her head, lovingly kissing her forehead. He didn't care who saw his tenderness. This is how it's gonna be with her from now on. He wanted Ezra to see how a real man loves a woman.

He nodded as he kissed her forehead again,'Ya got it, baby. I'll get ya home. We'll see our baby.'

They made sure to keep their words hushed, low enough for only them to hear. They didn't know if Ezra was aware of their baby. They wanted to keep things as under the radar as possible. They still weren't sure if he was immune too. They didn't want to risk it to find out.

Joel made sure Becca was fine with Maria for a moment hefore bringing Rich in. He explained to him the situation. They were keeping him locked up for now. Of course, Hannah wasn't exactly thrilled by it, but it wasn't as if she actually had a choice in the matter. It was for her benefit as well. She will appreciate it in the long run.

They walked out of the church house as Becca watched Ezra being carted away by Rich in handcuffs to the jailhouse. Hannah was crying and ranting as she walked after them. Maria walked alongside of Hannah, keeping a close eye on her. Joel knew he would be secure at the jailhouse. He would make sure to pay a visit to him later.

She saw the townsfolk all staring at them. One of the older women, Midge walked over to them and stared up at her pityingly,'It's such a shame after everything that's happened to you that you cannot see the error in your ways.' She sighed,'When trouble always follows you, maybes it's time to look at yourself and realize it's the demons living inside of you. This town was fine until you came along.'

'Was it?' Becca narrowed her eyes and leaned in close to her,'Cause from where I was standing, the council had ya by the balls. My grandfather was the least of your worries. Don't worry. We won't be here long.'

Joel's eyes widened and he bit back a grin. So she made up her mind after all. He was wondering when she was going to tell him that. Maybe she was feeling the pressure like he is. They needed to get as far away from here as they could.

Midge frowned and placed her hand on Joel's arm,'I respect you, son and everything you've done for this town. I really do. We love having you here.' She glanced over at Becca, as if she were merely a glancing thought,'All the trouble that came to this town has been attached to her.'

'That's enough.' His voice was firm,'I was raised to respect my elders, but I kindly ask to take your hand off my arm.' He jerked himself out of her grasp,'And I would kindly ask that you shut the fuck up. Leave us alone. As my wife said, we won't be here for long. Now if you'll excuse us, I'm taking my beautiful wife home to our kids.'

He looked around at the other eyes on them,'Anybody else wanna have a go at it?'

They all stared at him in bewilderment.They haven't seen this side of Joel in a long time. The murderous and raged side. He's calmed down the older he got, but when it came to his family nothing mattered. He felt like a young man again.

Becca blinked away tears as she gently grabbed on his sleeve, whispering,'Joel, please. It doesn't matter.'

'Yes it does fucking matter!' He looked down at her. If she wasn't going to get angry. He would do it for her,'You matter to me, goddammit.' His shoulders slumped as tears filled his eyes,'You matter.' He sneered in disgust at them,'You forget everything. You forget it all. Everything she's done doesn't even matter. All those years of working hours after hours.' He laughed and held his hand up,'Ya know what? She's right? Y'all don't give a shit. Y'all could really care less. Ya wanna live in your bubble? Well, we ain't gonna be here when it all goes to shit. Again.'

He took Becca's hand and tangled their fingers together, narrowing his eyes at them,'Let's go home, baby. You keep that head held high. They're a bunch of fuckin cowards and hypocrites.'

She took a deep breath as she walked with him down the trail to their farm. Ellie, Dina, Betsy and Matty were back there. God only knows how Ellie and Dina are getting along.

She was quiet on the walk back to the house. He sighed and wrapped an arm around her shoulders,'Where do ya wanna go?'

'I don't care.' She shook her head,'As long as it isn't Wyoming. We've overstayed our welcome in this state.' She frowned,'You want Colter Bay, huh?'

'I want you.' He shrugged,'Ya could choose to live in the Sahara and I would be down.' He kissed the top of her head,'I meant what I said. Wherever ya and the kids go. I go.'

'I wished he died. I really really did, Joel. Last time I saw him was back in Silver Lake. I thought…ya killed him.'

His eyes widened as he stopped them from walking,'Was he one of those guys trying to kill me? Gotta be honest. I wasn't in the right frame of mind back then.'

He thought about the kind of man he was back then. A man who took pleasure from causing others pain. He enjoyed torturing those men in that abandoned house. He would gladly do it all over again.

She looked up at him and nervously rocked back and forth on her feet,'I thought I was better and he comes back and it's like I'm that fucking little girl again. I hate that he makes me feel like that.' She averted his eyes downward,'That you see me like that. I hate that you know that.'

'Know what?'

'What they did.' She sighed shakily as she let herself out of his grasp,'What he did to me. I didn't want anyone to know my brothers did that to me.'

He took a moment to gather himself. He felt the anger rising within him again. It took everything within him not to turn back around, head to the jailhouse and finish what he started. He didn't like seeing her like this, knowing there wasn't anything he could do about it.

He gently snaked his arm around her waist and pulled her back to him,'Oh no ya don't. We don't do that shit anymore, pulling away from each other.' He cupped her chin and turned her head to look at him,'Ain't anything they did gonna make me leave ya.' He pointed back into town,'Ya think I give a flying fuck what Midge or anybody in that town has to say? I'll cut the electricity to this damned town before we leave.' He snorted,'I'm the one who hooked it up anyway.'

He smirked when he saw the smile on her face,'That's my girl.' He bent down and kissed her lips,'They don't control ya. We'll go wherever the hell ya want. I'll be happy wherever we go cause everyday I'll be with ya.' He swallowed the lump in his throat, 'We ain't gotta be just surviving and be lonely. Ain't no one ruining that for us, baby. No one.'

'No one.' She nodded and smiled tearfully.

He kissed her lips again and took her hand,'Let's get home. I miss our kids. That scumbag is where he should be for tonight. We'll deal with him tomorrow.'

Well, he'll deal with him later, but she didn't need to know that.

When they got back to the farm, Betsy was on the porch with Ellie and Dina.

Betsy saw the look on Becca's face and wrapped her arms around her, whispering,'I knew that fucker was trouble.'

A small smile formed on her face as she hugged her back,'Thanks, Betsy. For everything. Where's Matty?'

'Napping. I tried to keep him up as long as I could, but ya know how he gets when he's cranky.' She winked at Joel,'He gets grumpy like his daddy.'

Joel grinned as he looked over at Ellie,'You making sure Dina is settled in?'

'Yup.' Ellie shoved her hands in her pockets,'I made her a bed up in Matty's room.' She shrugged,'I didn't know where else to put her. We can't keep inviting strays. We don't have enough room.'

Joel sighed and placed his hands on his hips,'El, not now…please. Just give it a rest.'

She averted her eyes between what was supposed to be the grown ups and laughed,'No one ever wants to talk about shit until they happen and we're left dealing with the fallout.'

Joel understood she was angry. Abby left without a warning. It was something they weren't prepared for. There was something going on with that too, but that's was an issue for another day. There was only so much to deal with at once.

Ellie was also hurting too though. She shouldn't be left in the middle to deal with their messes. She should be included in their decisions too.

'Whatever.' Ellie looked over at Dina and smiled tightly and forcefully,'Come on, I'll show ya how to clean out the stables.'

Joel sighed in relief as Dina nodded as she followed Ellie off the porch. She had a wary look on her eyes, but she didn't back down from her. Good. Ellie was rough around the edges, but once she got to know and trust you; she was really funny.

Betsy watched the two young women as they walked down the trail,'They'll be okay. Ellie is a good girl. She'll look after her. We'll make sure she and the baby is taken care of.' She frowned,' Poor girl. Losing both her parents and the baby's father.' She shook her head sadly,'We've lost so much in this war.'

Becca held tightly onto Betsy's hands,'Thank you so much for everything. I really mean that.'

She leaned in and kissed her cheek,'It's what mamas do.' She had a serious look on her face,'That boy can't be trusted. I knew it soon as I looked at him. Being married to a young girl like that. I mean, it's not my place to judge, but it doesn't seem right.'

'That's because it isn't.'

Betsy squeezed her hands,'I made some lunch. It's on the counter. Do ya guys need me to stay a bit more?'

'No.' Joel shook his head and bent down to kiss her cheek,'We appreciate everything ya did these past few days. We really do. We needed that.' He sighed,'Hindsight right?'

She nodded and laughed, patting his cheek,'I always knew this place wasn't gonna go the distance. At least not without people opening their eyes.' She held onto Becca's gaze,'You have nothing to be sorry for. Nothing.'

'Thank you, Betsy.' She hugged her and kissed her cheek,'Now get going. You've done enough. We got the rest taken care of.'

Betsy nodded and smiled softly,'Oh, I know it.'

She wasn't lying. She knew they could handle anything together. She's witnessed they overcome a lot of things that would make people throw in the towel. They almost lost each other, but they managed to find a way back.

Even in death they would probably find a way back to each other.

Betsy hugged them both before saying goodbye to the girls and heading back to her shop.

Joel went out on the farm to check up on everything and convene with his ranch hands. He probably wanted to make sure Ellie and Dina weren't killing each other either. Dina was a strong woman though. If anyone could handle Ellie, it's her.

Becca was alone in the house and walked up to Matty's room. Well him and Dina's room now. Ellie was right. They did need more room. Especially after Dina's baby was born.

She walked into his room and saw Dina's bed made neatly next to his crib, just as Ellie had promised. She was a sweet kid when she wanted to be.

Matty was sleeping soundly on his back. She couldn't resist the urge to gingerly scoop him up out of his crib. He groaned slightly as he blinked his bleary eyes up at her. She laughed as he seemed to moan at her in annoyance for waking him up. He nuzzled his head against her chest as he closed his eyes again. His dark features reminded her so much of Joel.

She held him to her tightly as she kissed his head of dark messy curls. Tears fell down her cheeks as she closed her eyes, breathing him in. She never thought she would have this. She thought having a baby and a normal marriage wasn't fated for her. She was grateful Ben and David never got her pregnant. This is how things are meant to be.

'I love you so much, Mateo. Do ya know that?' She rocked them back and forth as she rested her head on top of his,'Thank you for letting me be your mama. For getting to know what that feels like. I'm so glad I share you with daddy. He's the only daddy I woulda ever wanted for ya. The only one you deserve.'

She smiled as Mateo seemed to smile at that,'I know. Cool right? Ya shoulda seen him today. I hope you're like him. Cause I don't wanna end up like my daddy. He wasn't a very good man. That scares me. That one day I'm gonna end up like him.' She hugged him to her and kissed his forehead, whispering,'I hope you end up like your daddy. He's such a good man.'

Joel was standing in the doorway of Matty's room. His arms were crossed as he leaned against the doorway. He heard every single word. It felt wrong to listen at first, but he couldn't walk away.

'Ya ain't gotta be scared of a damned thing.'

He couldn't help but interject. He always did have a big mouth. He planned to come and say hi to Matty, thinking Becca had been getting changed. He stopped dead in his tracks when he heard her speak. Ezra being back opened old wounds. Maybe she could finally get some closure in her life.

She glanced up at him standing in the doorway,'Sometimes I get afraid that I'll end up like him. I hate him and still do. I shouldn't still hate him after all this time.'

He sighed and walked into the bedroom, over to them. He wrapped his arms around both of them and kissed Matty on top of his head,'I don't think there's a time limit on how long we should hate somebody.' He snorted,'I hate him and I don't even know him.' He looked down at Matty in her arms and laughed,'He's gonna be too big to carry pretty soon.'

'I know.' She frowned,'Don't remind me.'

He looked over at Dina's bed and sighed,'I don't think El is exactly thrilled.'

'Yeah well.' She laughed,'Ya have a habit of throwing things at a girl without telling them first.'

He smirked as he took Matty from her arms and kissed his face,'Says the person whose brother was supposed to be dead.'

She returned his smirk and crossed her arms over her chest,'Ya had a couple skeletons pop up from your past too, buddy.'

He playfully narrowed his eyes as he backed away from her with Matty,'If only the good people came back.'

She heard the lilting in his tone and the sad smile on his face. She leaned up on her tiptoes to reach his height and ran her hand through his hair,'That's why we gotta appreciate the good ones while they're here.'

He placed a firm hand on Matty's back as he bent down and kissed her lips,'I'm appreciating all the good I got right now.'

She held onto his arm and rested her head against his shoulder. While she didn't need him in her life, she wanted him in it. She could do this alone, but she didn't know if she would've been able to make it this far. He would say the same. They supported each other strengths when they couldn't. They held each other up. They were stronger together than they were apart. God forbid the person who tried to break them apart again.

Marty started stirring awake and Joel rubbed his back, looking over his bleary face,'Hey, little man.' He kissed his cheek,'I missed ya, buddy.'

She smiled tearfully as she watched him with their son. He only affirmed what she knew in her heart. He was such a good man. He atoned for the sins of his past. He did what he had to in order to survive. She couldn't hold that against him. Just as he didn't hold what she did before the outbreak against her.

She kissed Matty's head as he rubbed the sleep out of his eyes,'I think he's mad I woke him up.'

'He'll just sleep longer tonight.'

Becca looked out the window, seeing Ellie and Dina out in the field,'How are those two getting on?'

'As good as they can, I suppose.' He sighed and shook his head,'She's upset about Abby, but doesn't wanna talk about it.'

'You know how she gets. She doesn't like to talk about things unless it really bothers her. I swear you're related by blood.' She frowned,'We need to figure out why they left so abruptly like that. Something made them run.'

'That's what I'm thinking.' He rolled his eyes,'It's always something.'

Matty patting his chest and pouting,'Hungry!' He winced and leaned back,'He gets that right hook from you. I hear ya, pal. Your old man could eat too.'

She laughed as they walked out of Matty's bedroom,'He gets his appetite from you.'

He smacked her ass in response to that and she scurried away from him before he could do it again. The drama and heaviness of the day dissipated in this house. Here with her family and the normal chaos of it all, she could actually believe everything was going to be okay.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

The rest of the day managed to go by smoothly. While Ellie and Dina weren't exactly friends yet; they were managing to coexist in the same house. Ellie seemed resigned to the fact that Becca and Joel wanted to take care of all the orphans in the world.

Dina was older than her by a few years though. She seemed to been through a lot as well. She mentioned losing both her parents and the father of her unborn baby. She decided not to give her anymore grief after that. She had enough to deal with.

Ellie understands what loss is. She wouldn't wish that kind of pain on anyone else. While she wasn't about another mouth to feed; she understood why they did it. She thought about it from her mother's perspective and what she must've felt like being pregnant all alone in a post apocalyptic world. She would take it easy on her. For now anyway.

Becca and Joel made dinner while the girls cleaned up. They had a lot of questions about Ezra, but they answered truthfully with what they could. They honestly didn't have a lot of answers themselves. All of this just came out of the wood work. They didn't even get a chance to come home and unpack from their honeymoon. It was right back to another issue. They didn't expect things to always be easy, but it didn't always have to be a battle.

They were so tired.

Joel just finished his shower and was sitting on the edge of the bed. He was wearing only his boxers. He didn't have the energy to get up quite yet. He found his eyes looking over towards the window. He could see the faint lights coming from town. He imagined Ezra sitting in his cell, crying over his broken and bloodied nose.

He smiled to himself. Good. That won't be the only thing broken and bloodied when he's through with him. He was locked up like the animal he is. His hands were resting on his knees, just itching to break every bone in his body. He wanted her to watch as he slowly killed him. He would fucking piss on his grave.

He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. It's not what she needed right now. His anger could wait until later. For now, he just wanted this time with his wife. Evenings were always their time together. He knew she appreciated it as much as he did. He wouldn't take that away from her.

After her shower, she checked on Matty and Dina, making sure she was settled. The young woman seemed…manageable. All things considered, she was taking things pretty well. She seemed like a go with the flow type of lady. She seemed to make the most out of any situation. She envied that ability in her.

She stopped by Ellie's room and gently knocked, waiting for permission to enter.

Ellie was changed into clothes for bed and sitting by her window, sketching something in her notebook. She looked up, giving Becca a small smile,'What's up?'

She shrugged as she walked over to her and sat down on the windowsill next to her,'I was just coming to see how you're doing. I know ya been busy with taking care of things around here and while we appreciate you helping out. I also understand you have your own life to live too.' She ducked her head to look over her face,'How ya doing with Abby leaving?'

'It is what it is.' She shrugged,'It doesn't really matter. We weren't anything more than friends really.'

Becca sighed. She wouldn't push the issue, but she could tell by the look on her face she was hurting. She knew while Ellie didn't love her. She cared about her as a friend more than anything else. Even if she was hurting, she wouldn't let anyone know it. She was like them in that way. They were good at hiding their emotions until they couldn't anymore.

She wrapped her arm around her shoulders and pulled her close,'I know it still sucks. And you're entitled to feel however ya want to. How are ya dealing with all this? Really? I know all this a lot to deal with.'

'I'm okay.' She shrugged,' I mean, shit sucks, but I'm kinda used it to it by now?' She shook her head and sighed,'I know that sounds pessimistic of me, but…'

'Ya kinda get used to the hurt after a while?' Becca smiled wryly as Ellie nodded,'I get what ya mean, but just because bad things happen doesn't mean ya stop trying to be happy.'

'Like you?'

She laughed slightly and nodded,'Yeah…I guess so, kiddo.'

Ellie glanced up at her and raised her eyebrows,'What about you? You're taking this whole brother back from the dead thing surprisingly well.'

Becca sighed as she leaned her head back against the wall,'At first I thought I was gonna pass out, but after I got over the shock? I just felt angry. I felt so much rage. I wanted to kill him. I've only ever felt rage like that a few times before.'

Ellie nodded as she played with the frayed thread on her pants,'Like with Tess?'

She closed her eyes and nodded, whispering,'Yeah…like her.'

She wanted to say like the doctors at the Firefly hospital and her father. She didn't think it would be fair for Joel to kill Ezra. It shouldn't be his burden to bear. She should be the one who gets that honor.

Becca saw the exhaustion on Ellie's face. She rubbed her back and got up from the windowsill,'You should get some sleep. I'll take the early shift tomorrow on the farm. Ya deserve some rest.'

Ellie looked up at her and frowned,'Are ya sure? With everything that's going on?'

Becca smiled softly. She was such a thoughtful kid. A lot of people didn't give her enough credit for that.

She bent down and kissed her on top of her head,'I'm sure. Thank you.' She locked her eyes with hers,'For everything. I mean that.'

Ellie nodded and smiled,'I know ya do. Goodnight.'

'Goodnight.'

She stood in the doorway and gave her another smile before closing the door behind her. She knew she would probably stay up, either looking through her telescope or reading another one of her books on space. Astronomy has become a huge interest of hers. One that her and Joel cultivated. She was so intelligent.

If there wasn't an outbreak, she would rule the world with her beautiful mind. There wasn't anything she couldn't do once she set her mind to it. It's just a shame she has so much hate in her heart for such a young woman. She knows what that feels like. To be so young and to be filled with so much hatred and rage. Some days you feel like you're going to collapse from the weight of it.

Ezra brought out that hatred again. She tried so hard to do better and be better. She would be damned if she let him take that happiness away from her and everything she worked so hard to achieve.

She checked on Matty and Dina again before she headed back to their bedroom.

She smiled softly when she saw him sitting on the edge of the bed. He was down to his boxers and his hair was wet from the shower and swept back from his head. She could see the prominent scar on his temple, painful reminder of everything they've lost.

She wouldn't allow sadness, pain and regret in these walls. Not tonight. Not ever. She wouldn't allow her brothers or her father in her bedroom ever again. Physically nor mentally. Her therapist said she needed to take her control back. She did that. She wouldn't let them take that from her again. Not when she worked so hard to get it back.

She closed the door lightly to signal her presence. He looked up at her, a lopsided smile on his face. He wasn't wearing his glasses, but he never did in bed unless he was reading. There wasn't going to be any reading done tonight.

He instinctively held his arms out as she walked over to him. He spread his legs out, letting her stand in between them. She was wearing a robe made of a thin material. He could tell she wasn't wearing anything underneath it. He was glad to see she wasn't letting Ezra make her ashamed and hide away from herself again.

When they first came to Jackson, she used to cover herself up all the time, even right down to her hair. She didn't do that anymore. Especially not with him.

He placed his hands on her hips as she ran her hands through his wet hair. He rested his head on her abdomen and closed his eyes, sighing softly as he breathed in the fresh clean scent of her skin. Nothing mattered when they were alone together in this room. Nothing ever did but just the two of them.

They shared so many moments together here in this room. Good and bad. She brought their son into this world in this very room. He made love to her for the first time, got to feel her from the inside out.

She undid the sash on her robe and opened it up, revealing her naked body to him. He slid his large hands inside her robe, splaying them over her abdomen. The scars on her skin were old and healed up, reminders of the past. He refused to see fresh scars on her body.

He kissed and nuzzled into her skin, letting his tongue dip into the indentations of her scars. He never shied away from them. He cherished them just as he did every other inch of her. He wouldn't make her feel like she should feel dirty or ashamed either. Nothing changed because of what her father and brothers did to her.

He would take care of Ezra later. Now it was time for him to take care of her.

He kept his hands on her hips. He wouldn't dare touch her anywhere else. After seeing Ezra, he didn't know how she was feeling. He didn't want her thinking he was just another man that wanted her body.

He lifted his head up as he blinked his eyes up at her. Her nails gently scratched his scalp and he leaned into her touch. He ran his hands up and down her sides with reverence. She was so precious to him. If anyone was to take her away from him, he would become scorched Earth. Everyone would pay. Losing her wasn't an option to him and never has been. Even when he didn't want to admit it to himself.

She took her hands out of his hair and slid her robe off, letting it fall to the floor.

He didn't move an inch. He didn't even think he remembered to breathe. His eyes looked over her naked body and he shook his head in disbelief. Seeing her was always like for the first time. He always seemed to discover something new about her body, whether it be a freckle or a mole.

She seemed to take great interest in his body too. She never shied away from what he considered the bad parts of himself either. She ran her hands through his hair again, not caring that it was grayer than dark. His beard and eyebrows were starting to get grayer. His body was starting to age. He didn't recognize himself when he looked in the mirror.

He saw she was beginning to sit down in his lap. He leaned back and gave her more room to settle herself in. He bit down on his bottom lip when she sat down on his erection. He was already half hard just having her hands in his hair, but when he saw her naked body; he was fully ready to go.

He felt like a bastard. He knew she felt it. She just got done dealing with her perverted pedo brother. She didn't need this, but the way she was moving around in his lap told him something differently. He didn't dare move, not knowing what she wanted.

He tried to lean back from her slightly as he placed his hands on her hips, gently placing her off his lap to sit on his leg,'I'm sorry.' He laughed slightly and shook his head,'I can't help it.' He risked looking down at her body again, feeling his cock throb,'You're so beautiful to me.'

Tears filled her eyes at his sweet words. Her sweet man. He was apologizing for being turned on by her.

She held his face in her hands and turned his head to look at her,'You said no pulling away from each other, remember?'

He laughed slightly, thinking about those exact words he said to her earlier on the trail. She always called him out on his shit. She made him take accountability for his actions. Other than Sarah, she's the only one who ever did.

'That I did, darlin.' He leaned back on his elbows and nodded down to his lap,'By all means, take a seat.'

She nodded and smiled softly, sitting directly down onto his lap. She thought about this in the shower. Not just the sex, but what Joel said to her. He told her the promise they made to each other a long time ago. Back when Tess came back to life.

Nothing's changed.

She cupped the back of his neck almost forcefully, something she's never done before,'Don't ever apologize to me when I give you this.'

She took his hand and slid it between her legs. His hand was large enough to cover her entire mound. She loved how big his hands are. She looked over his face, seeing his eyes widen in surprise. She felt his cock getting bigger inside his boxers. A thrill of excitement always ran through her whenever she saw the way he reacted to her touch. He was such a strong and powerful man to everyone else. They feared him, but here in this bed they worshipped each other. There wasn't any titles or expectations. Just Joel and Becca.

He didn't move his hand as she kept it covering her pussy. He could feel it throbbing against his palm and the heat of it. He closed his eyes momentarily and bit his bottom lip to muffle his moan.

She pressed his hand more firmly against her cunt, resting her forehead against his,'You're the only other man who will ever have this again. The only man I've ever wanted to be inside me.'

He couldn't help the moan that escaped out of his mouth. He hoped the kids didn't hear them, but if they were going to have all these kids in their house; they would need to learn to be quiet. They would be damned if they gave this up.

She ground herself down on his lap, relishing in the slight gasp that escaped from his mouth. She slid her hands inside his boxers and took his cock out. She gripped the base of his cock and bent her head down, sliding her mouth completely down on his cock.

His jaw slacked in pleasure as his eyes widened dazedly up at the ceiling. He cradled the back of her head as she sucked on his cock. All he could hear was the slurping sounds of her mouth on his cock. It was sloppy and uncoordinated as she still sat in his lap, but her mouth still felt fucking incredible.

He leaned back on his elbows, staring down at her as she licked up and down the length of his cock. Her eyes were locked on his and he saw the deeper meaning behind her eyes. This was more than lust and sex. She needed the affirmation to herself that she was still in control. She wanted something tangible. He understood that better than anybody.

He would lay there and let her use his body at her whim. He would give her anything she wanted if it made her feel better. The trust she gave him made him feel like he was invincible. He never wanted to do anything to ruin that.

He closed his eyes and sighed softly, running his hands through her hair as she sucked and licked on his balls. She was slobbering all over his cock. It was one of the messier blowjobs he's had, but God if he didn't feel so fucking good.

He didn't even register her body climbing up over his. She rubbed her pussy along his lips, whispering,'Put your mouth on me.'

She grabbed onto his hair gently but firmly as she brought his mouth against her pussy impatiently.

Joel's heart almost burst in his chest. She was never this demanding and forceful with what she wanted from him in bed. He would never deny her of anything.

He placed his hands on her hips and gently pulled her cunt down closer onto his mouth. He slid his entire tongue inside her, licking all around inside her walls. He felt her hand wrap around his cock and moaned into her pussy. Her limber body was bent back as she jerked on his cock. His eyes rolled in pleasure at the sight of her.

He let out an uncharacteristic whine when she pulled her cunt away from his mouth. He watched her yank his boxers down his long legs.

His eyes widened in surprise when he felt her cunt wrapped around his cock. He wasn't expecting that. He gripped her hips and let her move how she wanted on his cock, knowing she needed this more than he did.

He tried to sit up, but she placed a firm hand on his chest and gently pushed him back down to lie flat on his back. She's never done that before either.

She ground down on his cock, rolling her hips around as she kept her hands balanced on his chest. She slid her hands up his chest and over his broad shoulders. She slid them down his arms, feeling his muscles clenching against her hands. She could feel the tremors in his body as he lay still underneath her.

She put her hands in his and tangled their fingers together. She pinned his hands down to the bed. She knew he was strong enough to pull out of her grasp, but she loved how much he trusted her.

She hung her head, groaning almost in frustration. She needed more. It didn't feel like enough.

'What, my baby?' His eyes frantically searched her face,'Talk to me. I can't know unless ya tell me.'

She leaned in close to him and buried her face in his neck, breathing in the scent of his skin,'Need ya to fuck me. I need ya to make me forget.' She shook her head as she grinded hard on his cock,'You always make me forget.'

He choked up at her words, knowing she did the same for him.

He easily slid his hands out of hers and leaned up, sitting back against the headboard. His aging back needed more support and the old bed wouldn't creak as much. He made a mental note to have their next bedroom on the first floor without any kids. She could get loud, but maybe he had something to do with that as well.

He placed his hands on her hips as he thrusted up inside her and sighed in relief, finally being able to move the way he wanted to inside her. She met his thrusts as she gripped his shoulders and ground herself down against him. Her body moved against him as he moved her lithe body on his cock.

It was so much better this way. He could move her how he wanted, knowing her body like the back of his hand and how she liked it.

His legs were almost wrapped around her as his hands clutched her thighs. She could feel his strong thighs pressed against her hips, entirely caging her in with his body.

She pressed her forehead against his as she kissed him, mumbling against his lips,'Tell me ya love me. I need to hear ya say it.'

'I love you.' He said it without hesitancy as his lips moved against hers,'I love you so fuckin much I can't breathe sometimes. I'm so in love with you, Rebecca. You're safe with me.'

She sobbed at his words as she clutched at his face. His cock was deep inside her as he thrust up inside her over and over. They kissed each other sloppily and messily as their moans got lost in each other's mouths.

He clutched at the back of her neck as she moved against him desperately and with an urgency he's never felt from her before. He saw the tears falling down her face, but he wouldn't ask her if she was okay. Not right now and he already knew the answer anyway.

'Are ya mine?' She whispered raggedly into his mouth,'You're mine?'

His eyes widened incredulously. She never usually needed literal affirmations. It wasn't their style. They knew they belonged to each other through and through. Did Sophia or Ezra shake her confidence? He wasn't about to let that fucking happen.

He leaned back and stared at her, looking almost offended,'Am I yours?' He scoffed and shook his head, thrusting up into her sharply for emphasis,'Course I'm yours.' He slid his hand to the back of her neck, bunching her hair in his tight closed fist,'This the only pussy I been in for ten years.' He nodded,'Ain't no one else's I want, baby.'

She wrapped her legs around his waist as buried his face in her neck, breathing harshly against her skin,'I love you so much. So fuckin much, my baby.'

He nuzzled into her neck, his beard roughly scratching against her skin, but she relished in it. He kept whispering his love for her over and over into her skin, sounding almost like a prayer.

She matched his rhythm as she felt his teeth nipping into her skin. She meshed her hands in his curly hair, whispering,'I love you. So much.' She moaned as she felt the tip of his cock hitting her clit with every thrust. Her eyes clenched shut as she gripped the back of his neck,'God, I love you. I love you. You're mine too. All mine.'

'Damned fuckin right. Every inch of me.' He angled his hips lower for emphasis,'Every inch of this cock belongs to ya.'

He felt her thighs shaking and he gripped them tightly, not wanting her to make a lot of noise on the bed. He grunted as he felt her cunt spasm around him. She bit into his shoulder so hard he knew she drew blood, but it seemed to spur on his own orgasm. He felt the tightening in his balls and the tingling at the base of his spine. He grinned in anticipation of it. She always made him come so hard. She made his mind and body feel better than any drug.

She writhed in his lap as he pumped his cock inside her. He arched his back against the headboard as his come spurted deep inside her. He gently gripped the back of her hair and turned her head to kiss her. Their tongues tangled together as they slowly moved against each other, riding out their orgasms.

He laid back against the headboard as she slumped down on his chest. He never pulled out of her right away. He always liked to stay inside her for a little bit more. Not quite ready to leave her body just yet.

He felt something wet hitting his chest and he frowned when he looked down and saw her body shaking with sobs. He wrapped his arms tightly around her as he rested his head on top of hers. Tears filled his own eyes as he stared out the window, looking out into town.

He felt the rage festering inside of him as he thought about Ezra sitting in the jail cell. He had patrols to do tonight. He would pay a little visit to the jailhouse. He smirked already thinking about it.

He held onto his wife as he kissed the top of her head, whispering,'I'm always gonna keep ya safe. Ain't nobody gonna fuck with ya no more. I made ya that promise a long time ago. I plan on sticking to it.'

She nodded as she sobbed even harder at that,'We look out for each other.'

'We sure do.' He ran his hand through her hair,'Sometimes one of us needs looking out for more than most.' He sighed as she draped her arm around his waist,'Ya looked out for me so many times. Back in that hospital when ya didn't even know me.'

'I would do it all over again.' She kissed the long and jagged scar along his chest,'Just like ya did for me back in Silver Lake. Ya didn't have to bring me with ya, but ya did.'

'I know.' He slid down to rest fully on the bed, bringing her down with him,'I woulda been dead in that jail with Harold if it wasn't for you too.'

She smiled tearfully. Harold. He was such a good man. They've lost so many good people over the years.

Her hair was wild and curly from his hands and her face was covered in a sheen of sweat. She had a blissful smile on her face as she propped her head on her hand. She traced the scar on his chest from his open heart surgery.

He swept her bangs off her forehead as he looked over her face. She didn't seem sad. Not right now anyway. He felt good he could do that for her, make her forget and give her a semblance of peace.

'I love your thighs.' She blurted out.

He looked down at her, his brows furrowed in confusion as he shook his head, laughing,'My thighs? That's a first. They usually say my big-'

She rolled her eyes and covered his mouth,'Don't make it weird. I'm trying to be…honest.'

He wiped the smirk off his face and nodded,'I was gonna say my personality, but thanks for the compliment, darlin.'

She laughed and he smiled softly. He loved seeing a smile on her face. He's witnessed her beaten, bloodied, bruise and near death. She was always beautiful to him. But when she was like this? He wished they could live inside this room forever where nothing could hurt them.

He cleared his throat and kissed the top of her head,'I'm sorry. What were ya trying to say?'

She averted her eyes downward, feeling shy all of the sudden. She gave him a small smile and shrugged sheepishly,'Back when I first moved in here…I would be in the kitchen or…outside working and I would watch ya sometimes. Ya would be on a horse or…tearing up something in the ground and I would watch ya. The way your body moved.'

She ran her hands down his thighs and shook her head,'The way your thighs gripped around the horse. I would lie in bed at night and think about what those thighs would feel like while I was on top of ya. Like tonight. Ya were the only man that I thought about sexually like that. I thought sex was ruined for me, but the way I felt it when ya just smiled or…even just talked to me. I felt more turned on by that than anything I've done with a man before that. I would touch myself and come so hard. It was always your name I said whenever I came. It's how I knew.'

He cupped the back of her head and nuzzled his forehead against hers, whispering,'Ya don't know how many times I thought about ya, watched ya…wanted ya.' He laughed slightly,'Fuck, ya just don't even know. I thought I was a dirty old man taking advantage of ya.'

He thought about that fateful morning she brought him up to this room for the first time,'But when ya took my hand and…told me ya wanted me…' He shook his head,'I ain't ever thought ya would want me like that.'

'I do.' She grinned and leaned up to kiss him,'Everyday.'

'Everyday.' He repeated as he stroked the side of her hair.

She looked up at him and smiled tearfully,'Every time death thinks it's coming for us. We always prove them wrong.'

'It's what we do for each other.' He kept his lips pressed against her head,'Patty said it's what ya do for the people ya love. What kinda husband would I be if I didn't wanna kill Ezra for what he's done to ya? Ya killed Tess for me.'

'And I would do it again.' She didn't hesitant either as she looked up at him, firmly meeting his gaze.

He laughed slightly and nodded,'I wouldn't expect anything less. Just like that fucker we buried up in the mountains.' His tongue killed around in his mouth,'And that motherfucker in that jail cell? We get what we gotta get outta him and we take care of him.'

'We?'

He nodded as he bent down and kissed her lips,'We. I wouldn't do that without ya, baby. Ya deserve to make him pay for what he did to ya.'

And Hannah. She mentally added to herself.

Hannah may not realize it, but she was a victim to in this. She was abused and manipulated just as she had been when she was a little girl. Once she was broken out of the brainwashing and realized she could have control over her life, she was going to be a completely changed woman.

That's if they could strip away everything Ezra did to her.

She kissed his chest as he wrapped his arms tighter around her,'I'm sorry for being so forceful.' She closed her eyes, whispering,'You just make everything better.'

He stared down at her confusingly and smirked,'Darlin, no offense, but…I let ya be forceful. I fuckin loved what ya just did. Don't ever be sorry for that.' He traced the length of her jaw with his finger, whispering admittedly,'You're the only woman I ever really fully let myself go with. I ain't ever liked women on top a lot. I could never get off with women on top.' He looked over her face and shook his head in disbelief,'Ya turn me on just by smiling at me. Ain't ever felt that before. I ain't afraid to admit it anymore either. It doesn't make me a pussy to be in love with someone.'

'Who told ya it was?'

He stared up at the ceiling as he pulled her closer to his side,'Ya knew I grew up seeing my parents not have the best relationship. I thought being in love meant someone could hurt you.'

She lifted her head up from his chest and cupped his cheek,'I don't wanna hurt ya.'

He wanted to tell her she could and has. They've hurt each other a lot in the past, but it didn't matter none. Not when evil incarnate was sitting in a jail cell probably plotting to take over Francis plan for world domination.

'I don't wanna hurt ya either, baby.' He kissed her lips and leaned over to turn the oil lamp off.

He pulled the covers up over them as they settled into bed. It didn't feel like home like it used to. It felt like dread.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Joel was lying in bed as he stared up at the ceiling. His arms were wrapped around her as her head laid on his chest. She was sound asleep as she kept her arm draped over his midsection. He looked at his watch and sighed. It was eleven thirty. Sleep was alluding him. He would need to start patrols soon anyway.

He gently disentangled himself from her and groaned as he pulled himself up from the bed. He managed not to wake her up. She rolled over onto her back, murmuring softly in her sleep.

He sighed as he closed his eyes, running a hand through his hair. He placed his hands on his knees. His body ached from overexerting his muscles. He remembered back in his younger days he could fuck and fight every night, wake up the next morning and still work a twelve hour shift.

It took his body longer to bounce back than it used to. It was rare he could go a couple rounds a night anymore. He looked back at his wife sleeping soundly. She held him in such a high regard. She looked at him as being strong and capable. She said she loved his thighs.

He laughed dryly. It took him longer to recover from sex than it used to. What would happen when he couldn't keep up with her anymore? When he couldn't get it up? His body felt better than ever and he loved sex with her. He just hoped his body wouldn't let him down. Let her down.

He smiled softly when he felt her arm sliding around him from behind. He felt her bare tits pressed up against his chest. He held onto her arm and leaned back against her.

She kissed the back of his neck, whispering,'Ya trying to sneak out without saying goodbye? Ya should know by now I'm a light sleeper.'

'That's why our son wakes up with a pin drop. Between the two of us.'

She laughed softly as she kissed his back,'It's a little too early for patrols.'

'I can't sleep.' He sighed softly,'I'm feeling restless. I figured I'd get a head start.'

'You're gonna see him, aren't ya?'

He sighed at her words. She could always see right the fuck through him. It's why it was useless to lie to her. Dishonesty almost destroyed them the first time around.

'I have to, Bec.' He shook his head,'I can't just sit here knowing what he did and not do anything about it. I have to.'

'Why? Why is it so important to ya?'

'Cause I'm your husband and I couldn't live with myself if I didn't…do this. I couldn't be there when…but I can do this.'

She looked back at him and frowned,'This shit between me and Ezra was way before you, Joel. Before the outbreak.'

He nodded and sighed,'And I'm here now.' He shrugged,'He's still here fuckin with my wife. You best believe that's a problem I'm gonna take care of. How many times ya done the same for me?'

'Then I'm coming with ya.' She got up

and he gently grabbed her arm to pull her back to him,'Why not? You said ya wouldn't kill him without me.'

He reached over the nightstand to grab his glasses. He sighed as he watched her start grabbing her clothes from drawers. He knew she wasn't angry with him. Not really anyway. She didn't like people making decisions without her though, which is something he could relate with. He wanted to make her understand without starting a fight.

He bent down with a groan and grabbed his boxers off the floor, sliding them back on.

He walked over to her and stood behind her, cautiously wrapping his arms around her waist,'Rebecca, please listen to me.'

His tone was gentle and soothing. He's learned how to handle her over the years. Just as she's learned to handle him. Not even Tommy could handle his moods at times.

He pressed his cheek against hers, whispering,'Ya know I don't go back on my promises to ya. I just wanna go and have a talk with him. Man to man.'

'Man to man.' She snorted,'Cause it's the way it has to be right?'

He narrowed his eyes, ignoring her smart ass remark,'And here I thought I was a feminist. I just wanna see what he knows. Why he's here. I can't help if my fists accidentally hits him.' He smiled when he heard her laugh,'It might be easier for him to talk to me. I don't want that fucker round ya anyway. Next time he's near ya it's his last.'

She closed her eyes and sighed, feeling her defense dissolve as her shoulders slumped in defeat. She understood his perspective. To be honest, she didn't like being around him any longer than she had to. She didn't like what he brought out in her.

She didn't think it was fair to Joel either. He shouldn't have to fight her battles for her, but they were married. Sometimes you had to put up a fight for the ones you love.

Their tore apart their walls to let each other in. He couldn't live with himself if he didn't do this for her. He watched her beat Tess to death because he didn't have the courage to do it himself. He owed this to her.

'I just wanna talk to him. I swear on our son. I'll work on him. Ya work on Hannah.' He kissed her temple, whispering,'I think she knows more than she lets on.'

She nodded and sighed,'She does. She goes everywhere with him. Ezra doesn't let her outta his sight. If anyone knows what he's up to. It's her. I'll work on her. I was her midwife for two of her kids. She still trusts me. I know it.'

A smirk formed on his face. Her voice was cold and calculated, down to business. She would've made a hell of a Firefly, which is why he believed it.

She turned around in his arms and placed her hands on his chest,'He likes to brag. So it shouldn't be too difficult. He quotes scriptures a lot and gets fidgety when he's lying.' She snorted,'Which is pretty much most of the time.'

He cupped her cheek and kissed her,'I have a way to make people tell me the truth.'

She looked up at him and smiled wryly, knowing he was right.

He changed as she went downstairs to make him a thermos of coffee. She wouldn't be able to go back to sleep knowing he was out there speaking with her brother. God only knows what kind of crazy shit will come out of his mouth.

She was standing on the porch as he walked outside. She handed him his thermos and he smiled gratefully,'Thanks, darlin. I should be back by sunrise.'

She nodded as she looked out into town,'I'll take first light on the farm. There's a new cutting horse Bobby said needs to be broken in.'

He kissed her forehead as he stroked her cheek,'I got some work to do on the farm myself.'

'Not without sleep first.' She leaned up and gave him a slow deep kiss.

He cupped the back of her head and closed his eyes, moaning softly into it. He smirked against her lips, mumbling,'I still gotta go.'

She smiled against his lips as he groped her ass,'I know. We'll be here. Ya let me know what he says?'

'Every word.' He meant it too. He wouldn't hold anything back from her anymore.

She gave him another kiss and patted his chest,'Get on, cowboy. Give em hell.'

He tipped his cowboy hat and gave her a smile that made her heart pounded hard in her chest,'I always do, darlin.'

He winked at her before walking off the porch. She leaned against the railing and sighed as she watched him walk down to the stables. She pitied her brother to be alone with Joel Miller without nowhere to go.

Joel trodded Chaos down the trail. Becca waved him off on the porch and blew him a kiss. He tipped his hat to her and gave her another wink. He hated leaving on patrols. He hated seeing her leave on patrols too. He didn't like her pairing off with someone else, but she said he was too overprotective whenever they patrolled together. He couldn't argue with that.

He looked up at Ellie's window, sighing when he saw her light still on. She should be asleep. They didn't talk much when they got back. Then again, she hasn't been talking to him much lately. He told himself it was just her age, but she's become distant. She didn't talk to him much lately. Not like she used to. There used to be a time when she would talk to him about anything.

He had to admit, it hurt him knowing they weren't as close anymore. Maybe it would change. Maybe it wouldn't. Hell, Dina was nicer to him than Ellie had ever been. Dina was actually listened to what he had to say. She wanted his guidance. She reminded him a lot of Sarah.

He sighed and tore his eyes away from her window. He couldn't let his demons haunt him tonight. He needed to be strong for his family.

He tugged on the reins of Chaos as he headed into town. He had some very important business to attend to. His rage was starting to consume him, but he took a few deep breaths to keep himself calm. He made a promise to her.

The town was quiet and desolate as he rode to the jailhouse. He climbed off his horse and posted it up. He gave a few knocks on the door, waiting for the window to slide open.

He saw the deputy's eyes widen as they stared at him and he rolled his eyes. They took their jobs way too fuckin seriously.

He placed his hands on his hips and glared,'For fucks sake, Roger. Let me the fuck in.'

The young deputy stared at him warily. Rich gave him strict orders to not let anyone near Ezra. Joel especially.

Joel was getting annoyed. He held his hands up,'I just wanna talk to him. He's my brother in law. I'm allowed to do that.'

'Rich said no one is allowed to see him.' He frowned,'I'm sorry.'

Joel sighed and took his gun out of the waistband of his jeans. He pointed it to the padlock,'If ya don't open this goddamned door, ya have about a minute before I blast it off the fuckin hinges myself. It won't take much. Tim's latch work has always been shit.'

Roger groaned and unlocked the door, opening it. He knew Joel wasn't bluffing. He's witnessed this man do far crazier things. Granted, he's gotten a lot calmer over the years, but he was still the same man. The last thing he needed was to wake up the entire town. It would've been a completely different issue.

He looked up at Joel as he walked inside the jailhouse,'I'm so getting fired for this. Just promise not to break anything.'

Roger's words didn't register as he stared at Ezra sleeping in his cell. He sneered in disgust when he saw his nose bandaged up. Would the good citizens of Jackson show him compassion after knowing what he's done?

He wondered how he could sleep after everything he's done. He recalled Becca telling him she used to pray for sleep every night, but her brothers or her father would always come into her room. Her teachers always used to wonder why she could never stay asleep in class.

Joel closed his eyes for a moment and tried those breathing exercises Patty taught him, but they didn't nothing to help him. This fucker should never know peace. He shouldn't be able to sleep peacefully while his wife sits up at home.

He kept his eyes intently focused on him as his hands balled into tight fists,'Unlock his cell.'

Roger's eyes widened and he shook his head,'Ya said you were just gonna talk to him.' Joel looked back at him and smiled wryly,'Yeah, I shoulda known.' He shook his head and sighed as he walked over to the cell and unlocked it,'I mine as well considering I'm losing my job anyway.'

He unlocked his cell and averted his eyes between Joel and sleeping Ezra, shaking his head,'I'm gonna be outside. The less I know the better.'

Roger walked out of the jailhouse and closed the door behind him.

Joel walked into his cell and kicked his bed with his boot as hard as he could, causing it to almost rise off the floor,'Rise and shine, motherfucker.'

Ezra sprung up from the bed with a shout. His eyes widened as he stared up at Joel's towering and menacing stature. At six feet tall, he reached almost to the ceiling.

He leaned back against the wall as he swallowed harshly,'You here to kill me?'

He laughed as he slid the chair across the floor, causing Ezra's blood to run cold. He sat down, holding his hands up,'I left my gun and knives outside. Too tempting.' He locked his eyes with his,'I don't need weapons to kill ya though. I also made a promise to Becca that when you die she's gonna be there to watch.'

Ezra chuckled as he rested his head back against the wall and closed his eyes,'She always loved blood and violence. Then again, all women do. I find that some women are worst than death and are as dangerous as traps. Their love is like a net, and their arms hold men like chains. A man who pleases God will be saved from them, but a sinner will be caught by them.'

Joel wasn't a religious man, but he recognized scripture when he heard it. He grew up in Texas with a devout mother. He knew the Bible. Just like any good Southern boy.

Ezra looked over at Joel and grinned,'She caught you, hmm? Our Rebecca always did have a way of sinking her teeth into us, like a poison running through our veins.'

It made him sick to his stomach the way he talked about Becca, like she was his property. He wanted to smack the smug grin off his face, but he needed to keep himself calm for now. He needed him to talk first.

'She ain't yours.' He glared at him,'She ain't mine either. I don't need saving from her. She's the best goddamned thing that's ever happened to me. A fucking gift.' He couldn't help the emotion that raised his voice as he kicked at his bed again,'I worship her. I love her so fuckin much.'

He shook his head and stopped himself from talking. He didn't have to explain himself to him. It's not as if it would matter anyway. He wasn't listening and if he is; he didn't seem to give a shit.

'I love her too.' He cocked his head to the side,'I had her before you did. She'll always belong to me. To our family.' He looked him over and smiled,'You're old enough to be her father, yes? Are your intentions towards her honorable? Tell me. Did you wait for marriage or did she open her legs for you like the whore she is?'

Joel averted his eyes downward. If he kept looking at him, he was going to kill him with his bare hands. He could easily kill him right now. There wouldn't be a damned thing anybody could do about it either.

While he wouldn't kill him, he would rough him up a bit before he left. He didn't deserve a restful sleep.

'Why are you here?' Joel asked impatiently,'You said you came to warn us. Or was that bullshit?'

Ezra crossed his arms over his chest and snorted,'And why should I tell you after the way you treated me and my family?'

Joel got up from his chair and grabbed his broken nose, tugging on it forcefully,'Ya got some balls. I'll give ya that.'

He screamed out in pain as he tried to grab his arms, but Joel was much stronger and just kept twisting it. He smirked in satisfaction as Ezra pleaded for him to stop. He watched the fresh blood trickling down his nose.

'Okay okay. I'll talk.' Joel reluctantly let go and he slumped back against the wall, holding onto his freshly bleeding nose,'Ya ever hear of WLF?'

Joel's eyes widened and he nodded,'Washington Liberation Front? I've heard of em. I came across them on a hunting raid in Seattle. What about em?'

WLF or the 'Wolves' were a paramilitary organization located all along the West Coast. He didn't know much about them, only that they were a highly trained and organized group. They were all ex military. You weren't recruited without prior military training before the outbreak.

They existed before the outbreak as a response to the way the government handled the infected. Rather than helping them, government abandoned them. They forced them all to fend for themselves.

Manny knew more about them than he did. He was former WLF. He wasn't about to let Ezra know that though.

Ezra groaned as he used to bedsheet to stop the bleeding,'Ya know that Abby and her little friends? Owen and Mel?' He waited for Joel to nod,'They came looking for ya and Ellie back in Silver Lake. When David died, me and some other people that survived ended up allying ourselves with another religious sect called The Seraphites.' He smirked,'Ask Rebecca all about them. They were talking about ya killing people at some hospital. Abby didn't seem too happy about that.'

Joel frowned and shook his head confusingly,'Those kids are Wolves?' He laughed,'You're a fuckin liar. Ain't no way they're letting that little thing in. They wouldn't even let me in.'

Joel saw the look on his face. He was hiding something. He was holding something back. That's okay. He didn't need to get it all out of him at once.

Ezra laughed and shook his head,'You made such a huge mistake at St. Mary's. Such a grave mistake. They're coming. WLF released the Cordyceps in the pipes.'

'We bombed the tunnels.' Joel shook his head,'Ain't no way that's happening.'

'You're naive.' He grinned,'So naive. One thing I have learned: God made people good, but they have found all kinds of ways to be bad.'

Joel's blood ran cold at his words. He always wondered if what happened at St. Mary's would come back to haunt him. He always knew he would have to pay for the things he's done in his past, but Ezra was right. He was naive to think he could have it all.

Ezra kept laughing as blood trickled down his face,'The wickedness of a woman changeth her face, and darkenth her countenance like a sackcloth.' He sneered as he looked him over,'Our father would be rolling around in his grave knowing our Rebecca lies with you. You lay your filthy hands upon her. How does it feel to know I had her first? Before she drew blood from her womb, I had her. She never cried. She understood she was special. It was her destiny to give herself in offering. You should thank our father for making a woman outta her for you.' He grinned,'We broke her in.'

Joel pounced on him like an animal. He started pummeling his fists into him, relishing in his cries and wallows of pain.

He couldn't listen to it anymore. He couldn't hear him talk about his sweet Becca like that. The sick part of it is he wasn't lying. She said she was six years old when her daddy started coming into her room. How he let her brothers do the same, while her mama turned a blind eye saying it was God's will.

He pressed his knee into his groin, causing him to cry out in pain. He twisted his knee down onto his dick, smirking as he saw tears of pain come down his cheeks. He but he's slapped him over and over again, relishing in the reverberating smacks every time his hand connected with his flesh.

He pulled him by his hair and banged his head against the wall,'Ya fuckin sick of a bitch.' He slapped him for each word he spoke, gritting his teeth in rage,'Ya won't ever fuckin touch her again!' He leaned into his face, screaming,'Ya wish she won't let me kill ya.' He shook his head and laughed,'You're the luckiest bitch on this goddamned planet.'

All the pent up rage he has inside him culminated to the surface in this moment. Anger towards everyone who hurt them and continued to do so. Their relentless pursuit of destroying their lives.

Joel saw the blood on the concrete from his head and sighed,'Ya ain't ever gonna come near her again. Ya understand me?' He leaned in close to him and punched his nose again,'You don't look at her. She didn't give a damned thing to you. You took from her.'

Joel couldn't help the tears that formed in his eyes. He was so angry he was foaming at the mouth. He never felt such anger towards another human being.

He twisted his knee into his groin again as he cried out in pain,'Becca wants me.' He yanked on his hair and pulled his head towards him,'She loves me. Fucks me so good too.' He clicked his tongue as he leaned in so close to him their noses were touching,'Ya shoulda seen the way she rode me earlier. The way she moaned and took me in so good. I make her come so hard.' He grinned at the disdain on his face as he closed his eyes as if not wanting to hear it.

Joel nodded and laughed,'Ya don't like hearing that do ya? Yeah, I'm sure ya don't. She wants this old man. This old man makes her scream his name.Ya should feel the way she comes around my dick. It's the best goddamned feeling in the world. She begs for it. Ya never know what that feels like with her. I bet ya can still smell her on me too cause she was all over me.'

Joel grinned as he saw Ezra's cheeks redden. He looked angry and disgustingly jealous. That seemed to hurt him more than fists ever could.

Joel slapped him again as he looked over his face,'What's the matter? Don't like hearing it? Too bad. Ya gonna listen to every goddamned word I have to say. Just like I listened to your fuckin pussy ass. Just like I listened when she told me what ya did to her.'

Joel got off him and kicked him in the groin again,'Maybe I'll bring her here sometime and have ya watch. Show ya how a real man loves a woman. Cause I bet ya ain't ever made a woman come in your life.' He nodded and laughed,'Gonna make sure Hannah stays the fuck away from ya too.'

'That's my wife! She's mine.'

Joel sneered in disgust. The way he said it, like she was his property. It made him sick to his stomach. He didn't want to be around him anymore. He felt vile being around him. He's may have done some bad things in his life, but nothing compared to what Ezra's done. He was the true definition of evil.

He placed his hands on his hips as he stared down at Ezra. He could feel his knuckles pulsing and throbbing, the blood trickling from them. Becca was gonna give him some hell, but she would patch him up just like she always did. He would cut his arms off if it meant protecting her.

'She is more precious than rubies; nothing you desire can compare with her. Long life is in her right hand; in her left hand are riches and honor. Her ways are pleasant ways, and all her paths are peace.' Joel grinned at the look of surprise on Ezra's face,'I know scriptures too.' He pointed out the window, making sure he held onto his gaze,'That's what Rebecca is to me. You come here and try to take that peace away from her or me?'

He shook his head. He was done talking. He needed to go out on patrol.

Joel made sure to kick him in the groin one last time before walking out of the jailhouse. It wouldn't be the last time he would see him. He would come here every night and beat the living shit out of him if he had to.

He was worried about WLF though. They were a serious organization. They were dangerous. They were nothing like the Fireflies. They were actually organized, well weaponized and trained. There wasn't anyway they could win against them. There were too many of them.

What would Abby and her friends have to do with them? Unless their parents were apart of the organization, which would make a lot of sense. Maybe they had Abby and her friends to spy on them and they just fed right into it.

He ran a hand over his forehead and sighed. What did he mean about cordyceps in the popes? what the hell was going on? They were fucked. He needed to talk to Manny. If anyone would know what to do it'll be him.

When Joel got outside, he turned to Roger and patted his shoulder,'He's probably gonna need some medical attention.'

Roger's eyes widened as he peeked his head in, seeing him bleeding and writhing in pain on the bed,'Fuck, is he gonna die?'

He sighed and shook his head,'Regretfully…no.' He narrowed his eyes,'Let him stew for a bit first.'

Roger nodded as he looked back in at him,'Anything he tell ya we need to worry about?'

Joel thought about telling him what he said, but decided against it. He didn't want to get the town in an uproar unless they knew for sure. He needed to talk to Becca, but after patrolling. He still had other obligations he needed to attend to first.

&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&

Joel was eager to get home after patrolling. Luckily, everything was quiet. He made sure to check the entrances of the tunnels though. He thought about what Ezra said. Abby and her friends infected the tunnels. It would only be a matter of time. They would have to fight again. Their son was only two years old. They just started rebuilding the town. They couldn't afford to lose anymore people.

He rode by the jailhouse and grinned to himself thinking about what he did to the fucker the night before. He replayed it over and over in his mind during patrols. His partner wondered why he had such a shit eating grin on his face.

Regardless of what anyone else thought, he didn't get off on violence. What he did take pleasure in is hurting those who hurt women. Maybe it was seeing his mama getting beaten by his daddy every night, but he didn't like seeing women being hurt by men.

He hated the implications behind Ezra's words. He thought he was another man that just wanted to hurt her. He knew he didn't have anything to prove to him, but wanted him to see he made her happy. Someone could love him. He was capable of keeping someone safe.

He looked up at the sky, sighing as he saw the sun rise. He looked down at his watch. It was almost six in the morning. There was a lot to be done on the ranch. He used to love being a rancher, but he was starting to get long in the tooth. He just wanted to enjoy what time he had left, while his body was still capable of teaching his son things.

He used to always want a son to teach things to. He wanted to be there for his son in ways his father never had been. He wanted to teach him carpentry, fishing and how to build things. He wanted to teach him how to ride a horse and shoot a gun. He wanted a capable body that could still pleasure his woman. He wanted to dance with her around the house with all the windows open, just like she loved to do.

If they survived this, he was taking them so far away no one could find them. They wouldn't tell anyone where they were going. They would only tell the ones who matter. He would build them a homestead where no one else ever been. He would look at maps until his eyes bled. He would do anything for her.

He smiled as he rode up the trail to their home. He saw Dina standing out in the field, tending to one of the horses. He knew she was good on a farm. She helped out Rosa and Manny on the farm all the time. She was great with horses and a hell of a shot. She would make a great addition to Jackson, but it wouldn't be for long. She could either stay in Colter Bay or wherever they decided to end up. She was more than welcome.

Dina looked up at him and gave him a bright smile and a wave,'Hi, Mr. Miller!'

He chuckled softly. He told her about calling him 'Mr. Miller'. It made him feel old. She would always laugh and say that's because he was old. He's come to really care about this kid over the last couple years. Shit, she seemed to like him more than Ellie did lately.

Becca joked they were collecting kids like Pokémon. He would laugh and tell her to shut up and she was making him feel old. He remembered Sarah being into that when she was a kid.

'Hey, kiddo!' He waved his gloved hand at her,'Lookin good out there. Ya settling in?'

'Yeah.' She nodded,'Miss Becca gave me some tea for my morning sickness. She said it was herbs she used when she was pregnant. You're right. She's a nice lady.'

He nodded and smiled softly. That sounded like his Becca. She was nothing like Ezra thought. He said he was her brother and he supposedly loved her, but he didn't even know her. She took a special care in women who were abused. She took it personally.

'She is a nice lady. I told ya she would take care of ya.' He rested his arms on the reins of the horse,'Ellie being nice to ya?'

'She's being alright.' She shrugged,'She's going through a lot. I get that.' She nodded towards the house,'Miss Becca said if I saw ya to come up to the house and have breakfast.'

He looked around and frowned,'Where is she?'

'Out back hanging up clothes.' Dina grabbed the rope on the horse,'Gotta go. I'll see ya later!'

'Bye, kiddo.'

He watched her as she ran after the horse. She wasn't that far along where she couldn't do light duty around the farm. Hell, Becca fought in a civil war heavily pregnant with Matty. He was thankful she wouldn't be pregnant this time around. The way they've been fucking lately; it was a possibility.

He sighed to himself and shook his head. They needed to start being conscious of that. Things were becoming dangerous again. Especially now that WLF was involved. Abby was around them long enough to know them.

He brought his horse into the stables and went to find Becca out back. He smiled when he saw her hanging clothes out on the line. He saw all their clothes lined up, their linens and his jeans. He saw all their clothes lined up together. It was such a simple thing, but it meant so much to him. Their lives were intertwined in every way possible.

He took his hat and gloves off. He snuck up behind Matty who was stumbling around in the grass. He snagged him up and turned him upside down, making him squeal.

He buried his face in his neck and blew raspberries into his skin, making him laugh. He turned him around and kissed his face,'How ya doin, buddy?'

Matty held his hand out and tried to give him a cracker,'Papa, eat!'

He laughed and patted his back, looking over his face. He looked a lot like him, but his eyes were all Becca. He looked so much like Sarah too. He saw Charlie in him and felt bittersweet. He should've been able to have this kind of relationship with his first son, but the infection took that away from him. A selfish part of him hoped his son was immune. He didn't want to kill another one of his children.

'I'm okay, buddy.' He patted his back and grinned as he walked up behind Becca,'Dina told me a beautiful lady made me breakfast.'

She shook out one of Ellie's shirts as she threw it over the line,'Ya been gone a long time.' She looked back at him and smiled,'I figured ya would be hungry.'

He bent down and kissed her shoulder, pressing kisses up her neck. He pressed his nose into her warm skin, whispering,'You're a sight for sore eyes, beautiful girl.'

She leaned her head back and nuzzled her nose against his, kissing his lips. He was being extra affectionate. He kept one arm securely underneath Matty as he wrapped an arm around her waist.

She couldn't sleep the entire night. She stayed most of the night on the porch with the rifle on her lap. Seeing Ezra again brought back all those old emotions. Her therapist said it was normal to feel this way. It's how she reacted to it that mattered. She knew violence didn't solve anything, but sometimes it felt damned good to relieve that pressure and scratch that itch.

She saw the bruises on his bloodied and swollen knuckles,'That from patrolling or something else?' He arched his eyebrow and she nodded,'You're not in jail so I take it he's alive.'

He smirked and rubbed her stomach,'Ya seemed bummed about that?'

'Only if I missed it.' She sighed and shook her head,'Let's get ya cleaned up.'

He set Matty down on the grass and let him walk as she took his hand, leading him into the house. He carried Matty into the house and set him down in his crib in the living room to play.

They walked into the kitchen and she made him sit down at the kitchen table. She fixed him a plate of food and set it in front of him,'Eat, I'm gonna go and grab the first aid kit.'

He leaned back in the chair and ran his hand down her back,'Ya ain't my maid or nurse, Bec.'

'No.' She nodded,'I am your wife though. My man comes home hungry and bloody?' She bent down and kissed his lips,'I take care of him. It isn't a chore for me. I waited up all night for you, honey. I'm so happy you're home in one piece.' She nodded down to his plate,'Now eat. I know beating the shit outta someone takes a lotta energy.'

He chuckled as she walked out of the kitchen. He wondered what in the hell he's done in his life to get this lucky. He thought about Ezra sitting in that jailhouse and grinned to himself thinking about how sore his body must be.

She walked back into the kitchen carrying her first aid kit. She sat across from him while he ate. She opened up her first aid kit as she took out all the contents. She was in nurse mode as she looked over at him.

She looked down at his knuckles and frowned,'Did he talk?'

He swallowed his last bite of food and nodded,'A bit.'

He sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. He didn't want to tell her about the nasty and vile things he said about her. She didn't need to know all that. It wasn't important. It would only unnecessarily hurt her.

She got up from her chair and walked over to him and he spread his legs out, letting her scoot her chair closer to him. She gingerly took one of his hands and inspected the cuts on his knuckles.

He didn't even wince as she cleaned the wounds on his knuckles. She looked up at him and frowned,'So ya gonna tell me what he said?'

He swallowed harshly as he looked over her face,'Ya ever hear about the Washington Liberation Front?' He saw the uneasiness over her face as her body tensed up,'Wolves? If ya know bout them, baby. Ya gotta tell me.'

She sighed as she began cleaning his other hand,'I've never met them. I've only ever heard of them. David…used to be apart of this religious faction on Seraphite Island in Seattle. They call themselves Seraphites…or Scars as they like to be known by.' She shook her head,'They were created by this woman said to be a Prophet. WLF and the Seraphites are in a war for control of Seattle. We…we're on our way to Seattle when ya found us in Silver Lake. Their prophet and David wanted to take over the faction. We were waiting out the winter before we headed on. The leader was David's inspiration for the way we lived. She believed in a primitive lifestyle where we live off the land. David wasn't like the rest of them. He was too dangerous for them and she kicked him out.'

'And he thought once WLF killed her he would take over?' He slapped the table and let out a dry laugh,'That fucker Abby? She's WLF. So is those little fuckers she came with.'

Becca's eyes widened and she shook her head,'No fucking way, Joel. Her?' She laughed,'A small wind would knock them the fuck over.' Her eyes widened incredulously,'Joel…does she know I'm immune? Does she know about El? Do ya think she told her?'

'I don't know, Bec.' He took his glasses off and rubbed the bridge of his nose,'That fucker said Abby was here cause of what happened at St. Mary's.'

Becca gripped his arm tightly,'Joel? Do ya think she knows about me and Ellie? Maria?'

Tears filled her eyes and he grasped her thighs, sliding her onto his lap. He wrapped his arms tightly around her, pulling her close,'I don't give a damn what she knows. She ain't coming near ya. I'll kill her just like I killed those fuckers at St. Mary's.' He sighed and kissed the top of her head,'I'm gonna go to Colter Bay this weekend and talk to Manny. He's ex WLF. If anybody knows what to do with them, it's him.'

She nodded as he rubbed her back soothingly,'The Seraphites are just as dangerous as WLF. They have no fear because they think God is on their side and will protect them. 'May she guide me through the storm. May she keep me calm. That's their mantra. There's a reason why WLF fears them.'

Joel intently listened to her, remembering Ezra's words. There was a war coming. One that was bigger than them.

'He said something else too.' He sighed,'He said Abby was sent here by WLF to infect the pipes with Cordyceps.'

Becca sat up straight and he saw the frantic look in her eyes. He cradled her face in his hands and held her gaze,'We always knew this could happen. We knew it wasn't over.'

'They're coming for us cause of what we did at St. Mary's aren't they?'

He didn't know how to answer her question. Maybe it's because they both already knew the answer.