Let your thoughts flow through you, like a leaf through the wind.
Mind like a still pond, serene and reflective.
Don't think about a pink elephant.
"That wasn't in the book, was it?"
My calm state completely broken, I open my eyes to look at the book beside me.
The title read [Meditating for Dummies], and while it wasn't very flattering, I was grasping at flies at this point and catching nothing.
Sitting in the still somewhat unfamiliar room, I can't help but lament what my life has become.
Getting transported into what I once thought was just a very depressing story and de-aged to 17 wasn't my version of a good time though.
What did make it a little bit better was the gift I got with it though.
[Initializing integration of Gamer System 4.0 into Chosen User][Integration Complete.]
[Choosing starting Template] […]
[Template chosen: Nie Li (Tales of Demons and Gods)]
[Integrating Template]
[…No compatibility issues found] […]
[Template integration complete]
[Tales of Demons and Gods Skill Tree Unlocked.]
[Status]
Name: William Brooks
Class: NA
Soul Realm: Red
Soul Form: Disordered / [Redacted]
Soul Attribute: Neutral
Sp. Physique: NA
Soul Force: 3
Body Force: 31
Money: $5437
That was the first thing I saw when I woke up.
Now, like most avid fanfic readers, at first I was ecstatic. Like, who doesn't want to become a [Gamer]?
That joy slowly faded the longer I went without receiving any skills and found no way to increase or even feel my Soul Force.
Hell, the only thing I've been doing these last two weeks is going to the gym, which is the only thing that made something increase on my status page.
And buying books on meditation and reading online to get any idea of how to increase my Soul Force.
I can't even feel it.
I've been playing hide and seek with something that should be fucking obvious, considering I didn't have it before.n
At least my bank account transferred with me to this godforsaken place and rent was already paid for a few months, because if I was going to need to find a job with all that's happening, I'm gonna have an aneurysm.
I don't know what kind of being picked me and set me up in this world, or what exactly it wants me to do, but since there wasn't even a note or a message in the system it stuck me with, then I can just assume it wants me to do what I would do naturally in the situation it put me in.
*piep pip piep pip*
In my rumination on the clusterfuck that is my life right now, my alarm warns me I need to get going for boxing classes.
20 minutes later, I arrive at The Furious Boxing Gym. It wasn't a big place, but that was fine. I could just do the workout the coach gave me in the beginning until it didn't strain me anymore, and ask someone to spar at the end for a bit.
By now, I'd gotten into a rhythm that calmed me more than any meditation session ever did.
Doing my movement drills and focusing on my footwork sharpened my mind like few things could.
So it shouldn't have surprised me that the notification I'd been waiting two weeks for finally appeared in front of me.
[You grasped your Soul Force for the first time! 5 SF!]
[Skill Created! 'Moving Meditation' Unlocked]
The first thing that came over me was shock, and then elation that I'd finally created a skill.
The second thing that happened… was me tripping over the equipment I was using and falling flat on my face.
"What was that?!"
Pushing myself off the ground, I answered the big man that came powerwalking over.
"I fell, coach!"
Now in front of me, the man crouched and pushed his face so close to me I thought he was going to headbutt me.
"And why, for god's sake, did you do that, Brooks!"
"I was distracted, coach!"
"Distracted?! Why would you do that, for Christ's sake, Brooks!"
"I don't know, coach!"
"Well now that you're on the ground anyway, because you apparently love it so much you don't even know why you kissed it—give me twenty and continue your workout plan!"
"Yes, coach!"
If you couldn't tell, the coach of this place is a military man…
That wasn't, sadly, the only time I fell, and I think I broke my personal record for pushups in a day.
It also probably—maybe—not a good idea to end my training session with a few spars.
If it wasn't obvious with that decision that I don't have a lot of brain cells, then doing that reduced that already low number even lower.
Moving Meditation leveled up twice though!
I was even debating with myself whether I should jog back to my apartment, but my body was firmly against that idea.
Thinking over whether I should listen to it, or go try for some more skill gains, I didn't notice the coach walking toward me.
"Brooks, you okay today? I know we go hard in this gym, but at the end of your sparring I couldn't help but be a bit worried."
A warm feeling came up in my chest at that—it feels good to have someone worry for you.
"I'm okay, coach. There's just been a lot going on in my life right now that I have to figure out. It distracted me today more than normal."
That didn't really alleviate his worry apparently, but he didn't inquire further.
"Okay then. If you want to talk about it, then my door is always open. While I know you aren't as troubled as some of the youth that comes here, I don't want you to join them in their circumstances. This city has enough of them already."
"I will if I need to, coach." And I give him a smile, hoping to convey my understanding of the offer.
It appears he got that, and ended the conversation with, "Good. And call me Mr. Laborn when your session is done—I'm not drilling you into the ground outside of training."
Letting out a laugh at that, I can't help but say with a small salute, "HAH. You got it, Mr. Laborn. Sir!"
He walks off after that, grumbling about disobedient youth and rebellious youngsters, but I saw the small smile he tried to hide.
Getting on the bus, I look over my first skill.
[Moving Meditation - Lvl. 3]
Meditation doesn't always have to be sitting still and trying to think of nothing. Some people need to get moving to reach that special state of mind.
You are one of them.
Allows you to enter a meditative state even while moving your body.
Increases Soul Force gain by 1.5%
It even increases Soul Force?! Would it be weird if I started running up and down the bus?
It definitely would be weird…
Could I try to feel my Soul Force now?
Closing my eyes and focusing on my breathing, I try to feel the energy.
And while I couldn't feel it on the ride home, I somehow felt like I was getting closer to grasping it than I ever was.
I wanted to start immediately after eating, but tiredness hit me and I decided it's better to give my body the rest it clearly asked for.
Falling into my bed, it didn't even take 10 seconds for sleep to take me.
Waking up refreshed, I had a quick breakfast and did a small workout more focused on flexibility.
[Body Force 1]
Yes!
It's only one point, but progress is progress. When my Body Force reaches 100, I will officially be a Bronze 1-Star Fighter. I'm hoping there's a reward waiting behind it.
[Received a Quest]*
Quest: Become a Fighter!
Reach Body Force 100.
Reward: [Skill]
Accept Quest? Yes/No
My first Quest!
I really wanted to start on that quest, but my body was tired and needed rest. It was vexing, but I wasn't 100% sure my body was changed to become more like a gamer character, besides the obvious system.
I still got tired, still felt my body burn after a workout. I couldn't risk being injured in this hellhole I called home.
After all, living in the Cape Capital of a world that is being controlled by a shadow organization and threatened by a depressed space worm isn't that great for my health—physical or mental.
This brought me back to my previous dilemma: stay inside or go outside.
I'm not that social a person… I mean, I can talk with people just fine, but I firmly fall in the introverted category.
And considering my rather abysmal showing yesterday at the gym and how exhausted I felt, I don't think Mr. Laborn would like to see me working out so soon.
…
Who am I kidding—I already decided before I even clearly thought about my options.
Going back to my bed and finding a comfortable position to sit, I focus on my body, looking for that elusive energy.
It's weird, nothing really changed from my previous meditation attempts. I focused less on my breath maybe, and I could feel every movement of my body a bit more clearly.
But there wasn't anything I actively changed about my approach.
So imagine my surprise when, not even 30 minutes later, a wisp of something was felt inside.
Sadly, the moment I shifted my focus, it disappeared.
This did prove to become a familiar pattern. I finally had something to focus on in these sessions, which appeared to make all the difference.
Each attempt to feel my Soul became shorter and shorter—from 30 minutes to 25, to 20, to 10, to 5.
With each try, my excitement became stronger and stronger, but at the same time more focused.
My mind was made up apparently—I will grasp that energy today.
*grumble grumble*
After some food…
Putting my empty instant noodle cup into the trashcan, I cleaned my face up a bit and got back to the grind.
Somehow, I felt that my next attempt was going to be successful.
Sitting on my bed, my breath was even, my body still.
The sounds from outside faded away, and the only thing I perceived… what I could perceive… was my body.
The energy, my Soul Force, appeared again, around my navel.
I held in my excitement that previously got the better of me every time and kept focus on my breath and movement.
Slowly, the energy started to spread—or maybe my awareness of it did.
It felt like it was flowing out from my navel, going toward my heart and into my head and limbs.
Carefully, I shifted my focus toward it, approaching it like a scared animal.
Ever so slowly, my concentration moved until it was fully on my Soul, and I could finally attempt the next step.
I grabbed it.
*Gasp*
The feeling of touching my Soul Force was indescribable.
It was like before, I was only half complete and didn't realize it.
I wanted to bask in that feeling.
My system didn't let me.
[Skill Created! 'Soul Force Manipulation' Unlocked]
[Skill Created! 'Meditation' Unlocked]
Opening the notifications, I look at my two new skills.
[Soul Force Manipulation – Lvl. 1]
The art of moving and controlling your own Soul Energy.
[Meditation – Lvl. 1]
Meditation is all about connection with something—from everything to yourself or the world around you.
Or in this case, your Soul.
Increase Soul Force gain by 1%
Soul Force Manipulation was pretty simple and didn't give any bonuses, but every game knew that control of your own energy pool was paramount and something to continue training in.
Meditation was what I expected it would be from the info I got from Moving Meditation, though the bonus was stronger in the former.
Suddenly, another notification popped up in the corner of my eye. Opening it, saying I was surprised would have been an understatement.
[You have 2 Meditation Skills. Do you wish to fuse them? Yes/No]
What?
Uh… should I? I don't think the system would give me the option if it wasn't to my benefit, and I couldn't deny that my curiosity also played a large part in it.
Clicking Yes, the next pop-ups felt like there was a lot more going on behind my system and its processes than I was previously aware of.
That wasn't much, to be fair, but I found it noteworthy enough.
[Fusion of 'Meditation' and 'Moving Meditation'…]
['Meditation' is a higher-ranked Skill. 'Meditation' chosen as Primary Skill]
[Fusing 'Meditation' and 'Moving Meditation'…]
[Fusion Complete!]
[Meditation – Lvl. 2]
Meditation is all about connection with something—from everything to yourself or the world around you.
Or in this case, your Soul.
Increase Soul Force gain by 2%
While in movement and meditative state, increase Soul Force gain by 1%
Well damn…
The flavor text stayed the same, but now I could train my body while also training my Soul. This would massively increase my training speed.
I could maybe even become a Spiritualist in a reasonable time!
[Received a Quest]*
Quest: My Soul is My Strength!
Become a Bronze 1-Star Demon Spiritualist in 3 months' time.
Reward: [Cultivation Technique]
Accept Quest: Yes/No
I never clicked Yes so fast.
Being a Demon Spiritualist is what being a cultivator in Tales of Demons and Gods is all about, and probably where most of my strength is going to come from.
Seeing a path toward actually meaning something in this place, I fully dive back into meditation and can't wait for tomorrow so I can go work out again.
Chad the grinder would be proud.