Disclaimer: Anything that's familiar doesn't belong to me.

A/N: I've had a lot of fun writing this story! Thank you to everyone who has been reading - it's so appreciated!

Chapter Ten: Fake Finishes

Hermione glanced at the door, trying not to show her irritation lest it exacerbate Mr Crouch, who had stared at his pocket watch twice now.

She cannot believe Malfoy was doing this to her. After they had such a pleasant conversation this morning!

"I do think it was a win for your department to get Ilvermorny to participate in the Quad-Wizard Tournament, Mr Crouch. I hear there have been many failed attempts of trans-atlantic alliances over the years."

Barty Crouch stared down at her in disapproval, his lip curling slightly underneath his stringently straight moustache, "Perhaps it looks like failed attempts to the naïve, but the relationship between the United States and Great Britain has been on a steady incline for decades. Such matters are best not measured by signed agreements and press releases in the Daily Prophet, there is more nuance in progress."

"Of course!" Hermione stated, confused by his response, had she not just complimented the man? "I just meant that -"

"Granger! Mr Crouch!" Draco had barged into the Dungeon's classroom, his face pink from running. He panted, "Sorry, I… I just saw your note."

"You were meant to meet us in the Entrance Hall at 2pm Mr Malfoy. That was five minutes ago."

Malfoy's jaw clenched, he was a complete mess. He clearly got dressed in a rush, he was in his school uniform but his green tie was practically suffocating him and she was quite positive that the black robes he had on was a few inches too short for him, and he didn't even have on his 'Head Boy' badge. "My apologies, Mr Crouch."

He walked over to Hermione, avoiding her eyes and settling into the front desk next to her.

"Well, I suppose your first lesson, Mr Malfoy, will be on punctuality and accountability. When you are late, you signal to those whom you have an appointment with that your time is more precious than theirs. So." Crouch put on his cloak and hat, Hermione sat forward, eyes wide in surprise, "Your lesson on accountability will be that your actions have consequences, which will have ramifications on your team. Miss Granger was five minutes early to the Entrance Hall, I know this because I was ten minutes early, watching from the first floor. And despite her punctuality, she won't be getting an introductory lesson on Wizarding Diplomacy, because you couldn't care to show up on time."

"Mr Crouch, I'm sure we can make up the time, it's just five minutes." Hermione was gobsmacked, did he actually wait so that he could cancel the lesson when Malfoy got here?

"It will be a waste of all our time for me to deliver the content of lessons when the core principles are lacking. Now, good day." And with that he twirled about and exitted the room.

Hermione's mouth hung open, turning to Malfoy whose face cooled from his pink physically exhausted shade, to paper white shock. He caught her look and then jumped to his feet, "I…I… I'll get him back."

He ran for the door but Hermione shot out of her seat, blocking his exit, "Are you barmy! What about that intolerant man makes you think he can be convinced? Just sit down!" She pointed back at the table. Malfoy was in an unusual mood. What was he going to do ? Run after Mr Crouch and pester him into coming back? He ought to know that wouldn't work on that man. It was unlike him to be so… reckless.

Hermione shut the door just to be safe, watching Malfoy fall heavily into his seat. She took a deep breath, Crouch, as annoying as he was, had a point. Malfoy consistently dropping the ball had ramifications on her. The first resulted in her sleep deprived decision of dumping Anthony, though she didn't really regret that anymore, not after their fight at lunchtime. But now Mr Crouch was clearly unimpressed, and the teachers would hear about it, and they might lose their badges. And this was when she and Malfoy were in the best place they had EVER been. Maybe it was impossible for them to work together!

He had his forehead balancing on his fingertips, his elbows on the desk, massaging his temples.

"Are you alright?"

He sighed, "Granger, I'm so sorry. I fucked up."

Hermione's back straightened, it wasn't so much what he said, it was how he said it. Malfoy was being contrite. She never thought he was capable of such a notion. His voice also heightened on his last three words, he was being emotional.

She wanted to agree with him, she ought to, but he looked a bit like a wounded animal, it didn't seem fair for her to swoop in and devour him, even if he made easy prey right now.

"You must have got to the Entrance Hall two minutes late in order to see my note and come down here and be five minutes late collectively. Crouch was being unreasonable. Yes, tardiness is disrespectful, but people ought to be given a chance to explain. So?"

She could feel her nails pierce her palm as she squeezed it into tight fists at her side, trying not to shout at him. All they needed was for Professor Snape to show up to find them mid-argument and he'd probably sack them himself.

He met her stare steadily, but didn't speak. Hermione folded her arms and leaned against the teachers desk behind her, keeping her face firm even though Malfoy's expression was soft and wavering.

He broke eye contact and stared at the far wall. They were in a dungeon classroom, but not one she was familiar with. Professor Snape gave them permission to use this for these Leadership lessons. She thought it might have once been used to teach Alchemy, spotting the elemental posters that decorated the hall. Hermione had a fascination with that magical science, it was disappointing it was not offered as a subject at Hogwarts in well over a century.

"I was upset." She looked back to him, noticing him run a finger over his left hand knuckles, the middle one looked swollen as if he had punched something. She had left him this morning with Harry… her eyes narrowed, he better not have fought with him! "It's no excuse. I should have been here on time."

She took a deep breath, knowing confronting him about possibly punching Harry wasn't the best direction for this conversation, and she jumped onto the desk behind her and got comfortable, distracting herself with repositioning her robes and she caught Malfoy staring at her legs.

An absolute mad thought flickered through her mind, that if she had parted them just a few centimetres, he'd see her panties. She crossed her legs at that, she didn't know what was going on with her?

She'd been having intrusive weird irrational thoughts like this for weeks and it made absolutely no sense. Draco Malfoy stood for everything she despised. She'd heard his father was a death eater during Voldemort's reign, and he was always insulting Headmaster Dumbledore, and had been most supportive of Dolores Umbridge last year. Malfoy tried to get Buckbeak killed because he didn't care to listen to Hagrid's instructions back in third year! If it weren't for Daphne Greengrass, Hermione wouldn't be able to go five minutes without hexing the great idiot.

So why did she keep having these weird fantasies about him? She understood why she'd sometimes feel attracted to him when they argued, that was just biological, your body flooded with hormones, the emotional centres of your brain all fired up. She'd read that stress hormones actually promoted the release of endorphins, which is also why Hermione got super horny during exam periods.

All of that made sense, but the fantasies? She hated everything this boy stood for, so why on earth would she want to expose herself to him?

She took another calming breath.

"No. If you were having a hard time, you should have wrote me. I'd have made an excuse for you. Crouch was right about one thing, Malfoy. Like it or not, you and I are a team. And yes, our actions affect each other, but in both ways, good and bad." She frowned at the closed door, "I don't know if I want to learn diplomacy from a man so proud he's wounded by having to wait for a mere two minutes."

"It's not about me being late. He doesn't like my family, and I know that so I should have been here 10 minutes early, like I planned to." He bit out, yanking off his tie in frustration.

"He doesn't like your family? Aren't you always going on about your father being good friends with the Minister for Magic?"

He glared at her, "I don't go on about it. Anyway, Crouch and Fudge despise each other, so that's not going to help me is it?"

Hermione shook her head in disbelief, easily coming back to her senses when she was reminded what a privileged prick he was, "It's so unfair that you have access to all of this information just because your father-"

"My father," Malfoy spat out, "doesn't need to tell me those two hate each other. I read the Prophet back to front everyday since I was seven years old. I know they don't like each other because Crouch was touted to be the next Minister for Magic until his falter from grace, and Fudge got the spot."

"Falter from grace?"

"Well he got sacked as Head of Magical Law Enforcement in the eighties, but landing Head of International Magical Co-operation isn't exactly enough of a downgrade for it to be considered a fall."

"He used to be Head of Magical Law Enforcement." Hermione grimaced at the door, "Raving Rowena, did anybody even get a fair chance with the man. No wonder they sacked him."

"Depends on your definition of fair. Also his approval ratings were through the roof when he was fired." She turned a quizical eye on him, "He got the sack because his son was a death eater." She gasped, he seemed to enjoy feeding her gossip, his face relaxing, "And he was the one that delivered the sentence. So yeah, I'm not surprised he hasn't let me off with a warning for being two minutes late."

"How does the head of Magical Law Enforcement have a death eater for a son?"

"Why, because he's some big influential man he can't be a shit father?"

Hermione met his gaze, there was an evident anecdotal edge to his words. "Surely there's a limit to what baggage we claim from our parents?"

"Spoken like a girl with a very small suitcase."

She shook her head, "So it's Crouch's fault his son was a death eater?"

He sat forward, his eyes narrowed, "I don't know. When's the last time you heard someone with a great relationship with their parents joining a megalomaniac's cult?"

"Plenty of people have daddy issues and they refrain from being bigots, murderers and rapists." She folded her arms tightly about herself and straightened her back, she wasn't going to let him explain away his lots despicable choices.

Malfoy leaned back in the chair, his long legs poking out from under the desk, but he didn't break eye contact, "Must be nice."

"What?" Hermione was watching his fingers drum on the table, annoyed at how quickly he could assume this unbothered stance.

"Life up in that ivory tower of yours."

Hermione's mouth fell open and her hands went to her hips, "Are you seriously accusing me of living in privileged seclusion!"

"And why shouldn't I? It's so easy for you to sit there and judge everyone else's decisionmaking, when you probably grew up being told you were a special little peanut."

Her hands fell from her hips at his words and gripped the desk edge, "How do you know that!"

He straightened slightly, no longer nonchalant as Hermione kept herself on the desk, refraining from pouncing on him, "It doesn't matter. You clearly are the apple of your parents eyes, you've never had to wonder where you stood with them!"

"Malfoy! How do you know what my father calls me!" Hermione didn't know why this angered her as much as it did. It felt like an invasion of privacy for him to know that, and she was sick and tired of people learning things about her that she didn't give them permission to know.

"I read it in one of his letters to you last year." He frowned, looking at her as if she was crazy, "When Umbridge made us check the mail coming into the school. Salazar knows why, if she really wanted proof of Dumbledore trying to overthrow the Minister he wasn't exactly going to be dumb enough to write it down."

"I completely forgot about your stupid Inquisitorial Squad." She shook her head, "You see why nobody feels sorry for your lot! You aided in the existence of a police state in Hogwarts! Do you ever think for a second that my father didn't want some nosy berk reading our correspondence!"

"I didn't suggest that she become High Inquisitor! She was Senior Undersecretary to the Minister, what was I meant to say when she request I join her stupid student society!"

"You're meant to say no! That's what Daphne said! Did you honestly think Dumbledore was trying to overthrow the Ministry of Magic! Why?"

"It wasn't about the stupid coup she thought he was plotting. Which by the way, which numb nut decided Dumbledore's Army was a good shout for a name? You honestly think he's a good headmaster?"

"Of course I do! Why would you think he isn't!"

"He had a fucking tool for immortality hidden in our basement as if this is his personal Gringott's vault! He lets us get taken to the forbidden forest for detentions! He hired that half-giant oaf as a teacher, and you have to admit he is shit at his job! And then he gets Mad Eye Moody to teach us and of course you lot loved him but he had us Slytherins unfairly in detention all year round. I had been accused of trying to murder him SEVEN times, they searched my room the first three times at the accusation! And you all found it hilarious, didn't you! Didn't think it was an invasion of privacy then! Do you blame us for wanting revenge when Umbridge took the job. And then he hires the ice cream man to teach Ancient Runes."

"Professor Fortescue is an amazing teacher! As is Hagrid!" Hermione shouted. She didn't care that Hagrid was not qualified, he loved magical creatures more than anybody she knew and passion was important! Look at Snape, he was a great brewer but possibly her worst teacher ever! And yes they were all surprised when Professor Fortescue had been hired in their fourth year as Ancient Runes Master but they had no idea he had been a curse breaker in his youth, and that was a pleasant surprise!

"Babbling was much better at Ancient Runes, and you know it!"

"Well he needed someone to teach Defence that year, and hiring Professor Fortescue for Runes allowed Babbling to move to Defence, which she's had previous experience with!"

"Wouldn't it have been smarter to, I don't know, train Fortescue as a defence teahcer and keep Babbling on as Rune Mistress?"

"Well she was going to retire! He'd need a replacement for her anyway!"

"And it's far easier to find a replacement for Ancient Runes, nobody thinks the job is cursed. Unless the handsome curse breaker is afraid of curses all of a sudden."

Hermione narrowed her eyes, "You think I like Professor Fortescue because of his looks!"

"Why, have you suddenly acquired some depth to your laws of atrraction. If I remember correctly you almost started a Gilderoy Lockhart fan club and everyone knew that git was a phony."

"Professor Lockhart was a good teacher. It's a shame what happened to him."

"Yeah he's a right loss to Wizarding Society." He rolled his eyes, "Yeah, it was a really smart idea getting an Ancient Runes teacher to teach us Defence." He went back to his original argument, "Oh, but you know what was even smarter." Malfoy's voice dripped with sarcasm, "The headmaster teaching the subject, oh wait, wasn't that the year we kept getting free periods because, surprise surprise, the man was too busy to teach. And you blame the Ministry for intervening by sending us Umbridge?"

"Yes, I do. Because this is Hogwarts, it isn't a department in the Ministry of Magic for Fudge to do as he pleases. And for him to throw his toys around when he feels like people aren't giving him the respect he thinks he deserves!"

"The ministry has a responsibility to its constituents. Hogwarts is able to function at its behest."

"The ministry has no jurisdiction at Hogwarts, it never has! The Founders made it very clear that the school was to function independently. That whole spiel about ministry regulated curriculum that Umbridge spouted was her attempt at censorship!"

"Censorship because she wanted a decent Care of Magical syllabus? That she didn't want some barmy lady peddling false prophecies to students. You walked out of Trelawney's class!"

"Well it's not a problem with Trelawney that I have! It's divination on the whole. It's ridiculous, reading the future."

He burst out laughing, "You don't believe in clairvoyance? Are you serious?"

"Do you?" Whatever weird attraction she had to the boy dwindled at that admittance.

"Of course. True seers are rare, but foresight's possible." He shook his head, "Merlin, you don't believe in it because you can't do it. And because you can't do it, you think it's bollocks. Granger, that's pathetic."

"No, what's pathetic is blaming your father for all of the issues you cause. You messed up with Crouch today, you were late because you were upset. And you know what Malfoy, I was upset too! But I showed up on time, because I don't live in an Ivory Tower. I don't straddle the lap of privilege that you do."

"What? Straddle the lap of privilege?"

"Yes! You grind up all on her, poor girl. Take whatever you want."

"I need you to clarify that this is a metaphor Granger. I don't like your implication."

Hermione faltered, "Of course it's a metaphor. I just mean you get to be upset and be late, and be upset that someone's upset with you for being late. And I don't get any of that because I know I don't get second chances. And maybe Crouch is an insufferable prat, but I was really looking forward to this lesson."

"Why were you upset?"

"What?" She pulled her robe back onto her shoulder, she had been gesticulating too aggresively the garment practically fell off her.

"I don't speak in weird metaphors Granger, it's quite a simple question."

She readjusted her left sock which was slipping down her leg, just to bide her time. She caught Malfoy's eyes on her and she frowned at him, but straightened up. "Well you didn't tell me why you were upset."

"You didn't ask."

She replayed the conversation in her head and then just realised she hadn't, "Oh. Well. Why?"

"I asked first."

"Real mature." She sighed, and adjusted herself on the table. She didn't know why she was still sat on the teacher's desk. Initially it was just to face Malfoy as she chided him, but she had to admit she enjoyed this unusal height leverage this offered, she liked towering over him for a change. "Anthony and I got into an argument at lunch. It's stupid."

"Did he find out about your sex friend."

"My what?"

"Well, you said that a friend asked you for sex, didn't you?"

She dismissed that thought with a wave of her hand, "No. I don't want to talk about it."

"Oh. Okay."

"I wasn't telling you I was upset so we can share secrets. I was trying to explain that we all have stuff. Just some of us can't let the stuff weigh us down."

He arched his left brow at that, his fingers stopping mid-drum. "Nice, Granger." He stood, and Hermione replayed her words, trying to understand what had upset him.

"I'm not trying to say that you're weak or something for being weighed down by things."

"You're just trying to say you're really strong? Congratulations."

"Ugh." She jumped off the table and stomped her foot, "I'm trying to say I don't have options to be anything but strong. But I'm not… Malfoy, I'm not calling you weak."

"Whatever, I have to go."

"No, Malfoy!" He was already at the door, why was she now feeling like a bad person? If she were a wounded eagle, this snake would have bit at her with ease, why wasn't she clawing him to pieces? "He told people about me in bed."

"What?" He turned around, the closed door now at his back.

"Anthony." She swallowed, unsure why she was blurting this out, "I was upset with him because I found out that he spoke about us. Intimate stuff." Her lip quivered and Malfoy's eyes widened, "It's stupid. We've been together since I was fourteen, I thought we were friends. I didn't think he'd ever…" Her nose was burning but she refused to drop another tear for Anthony, "I suppose it's at least just Michael and Terry."

"I'm sorry. That's a dick move."

"Well I hurt him. And I get that. I know it's old fashioned, but I don't want people to know my business."

"It's not old fashioned. You allowed him to see you in your most vulnerable state. He should understand that's not morning gossip."

"He said he wasn't gossiping. He had asked them for advice ages ago, and I guess now that I'm not dating their friend they think it's okay to talk about me." Hermione was so angry when she remembered them casually teasing her at lunch. The tear fell, and she quickly wiped at her face. "It's stupid getting upset about it, because they won't spread rumours. They didn't mention it in front of anybody. They're not like that. It just feels weird that more people know about me in bed than I thought they would. I thought I just had sex with Anthony, not Anthony and everyone he ever decides to describe such intimacies with.

"Not all men are as dumb as Boot and Corner."

"Oh, and you don't talk about girls with your lads."

He cocked a brow, "Lads? Okay… And not really. Say what you will about us Snakes, but we know how to keep a secret. Plus, it's a bit complicated what with all the betrothals. Most of the girls in our year are more or less engaged. It's rude to spread rumours about someone's fiancee."

She choked out a gasp, "So you don't spread the rumour for the sake of the man, not for respect of the woman."

"I don't make the rules. Personally, I don't talk about any of that." He walked towards her, and half-sat on the teacher's desk, letting his bag fall to the floor as his one leg stretched out and the other supported him on the table. In this position they were able to look each other in the eye, and she wondered whether he did this on purpose, wanting to be on the same level? "When we were fourteen Terence Higgs had a crush on Daphne. Yes, Sucker Pod Higgs. Bloody weird. Anyway, he asked her on a date, and she said no, because she's not an idiot. He was upset and he spread this rumour that he caught her giving Blaise… well… doing stuff with him. This wasn't the first time some stupid rumour was spread about Daph, she's not very well liked amongst the girls in our year. But she got really upset, which she never did before and this wasn't even that bad as rumours go. I then realised it was because she was actually messing about with Blaise. 'Make out mates'." He muttered annoyed, and Hermione gave a small smile, clearly this was some traumatic memory for him, "All that to say, I've only seen Daphne cry twice in my life. I still don't fully understand why she was that upset, but I quickly learned that it is a shitty thing to do and I don't spread that stuff around."

"Well, I wouldn't have minded if they were just talking about Anthony and I in bed, we've been together for three years, I don't think anybody would be surprised we made love." He grimaced at her words and she laughed, "That's what it's called when you fornicate with somebody you love, Malfoy." She shook her head, "It's just very specific things that I'm not comfortable anybody knowing, that I thought Anthony knew was obviously taboo to be talked about with his mates. And I don't really care that they know." He gave her a look of disbelief, "I don't! I just.. ugh, I don't know." She glanced at the corner of the room, "Why are we talking about sex again?"

"You brought it up this time." He frowned, "Actually, you've brought it up every single time. Granger, you're sex obsessed."

"I am not!"

"Well, it's either you're always thinking about sex, or, you're always think about sex with me."

"Well it's definitely not that." Her nostrils flared in her defiance.

"Fine, then I guess you're just a little freak, aren't you."

"I'm not a freak." She spat out, folding her arms. "Why are we still here!" She just realised there was no reason for her to be in this room a second longer and headed for the door.

"Oh come on Granger, I was just teasing."

"It's like you don't listen. I was just saying that boys talking about me in bed upsets me, so you proceed to talk about me being a freak in bed?"

Malfoy had definitely touched a nerve with that, and Terry and Michael's words from lunch swam in her head.

"Ooh Terry, you pushed all the wrong buttons on Granger last night. She was pretty miffed at you at the party."

"Hahah, well you forget Mike, Granger's button doesn't even work. Press it all you like, right Tony?"

"Well I have a theory that Anthony wasn't using the right kind of controller. I bet she's a bit freaky in bed."

"I hate that you lot take Muggle Studies and I don't. What's a controller?"

They obviously didn't know she was standing a few feet behind them at the time. But what hurt her the most was Anthony didn't even defend her, or tell them to shut up. He was just annoyed that he didn't understand their jokes. Jokes mad at her expense.

Malfoy swallowed, "Well shit, when you put it like that. Granger." He pushed off the desk and shut the door that she had just opened, "Come on. I was just teasing, and you're completely right, you said it wasn't funny. I'll stop." She let go of the door knob and he walked back to the teacher's desk, "I just noticed that Crouch left his notes." He gestured at a folder that Hermione hadn't spotted, "Do you want to look over it? Discuss it?"

"I suppose it won't feel like we've completely wasted our time then." She opened the folder and frowned, "Ugh, it just has the hierarchal structure of the ministry of magic." She gasped, "He has the different departments ranked! He has Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, Magical Games and Sports and Magical Accidents on the lowest tier! There isn't a hierarchy among the departments?!"

"Well, offically, no. But unofficially everybody knows your best bet of becoming Minister for Magic is to head Law Enforcement or International Magical Co-operation, so I can see why he has it ranked higher." He laughed, "I mean we've never had a Minister that was previously the head of Regulation and control of Magical Creatures."

"What's funny about wanting to champion creatures that our kind don't allow a voice."

"Nothing." He shrugged, "It obviously has it's place, but some Snidget Rights Activist isn't going to become the next Minister for Magic."

"And why not?"

"Because while they're busy bothering about lumpy birds, MACUSA is trying to push tighter wand regulation to the ICW as an international policy. You're talking about Umbridge running a police state. Those Americans will have us registering our wands as a magical signature so it can be tracked."

"We already have the trace put on us, why would that matter if we have to register our wands? They only want to do that to track dark magic use."

"Oh you don't seriously believe that! Also, the trace is put on the invididual, it breaks when you're seventeen. Putting it on a wizard or witch's wand." He shook his head, "It's invasive. Also who has access to this tracking? Why should MACUSA have the ability to know what magic and where I perform it? This isn't about catching potential dark activity. This is about throwing weight around."

"It's a potentially preventative measure. I don't mind them having my magical signature, there isn't any magic I'm ashamed of claiming."

"It's not about the magic, it's the principle. Also, why are they rocking this boat. This is the longest bit of peace time this country has seen in decades. The Dark Lord amassed his power when our Ministry came for the wards, if they come for our wands, can you blame a retaliation?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Hermione was glaring at him, they were no longer on the same level, but she was confident in its potency she didn't need the height advantage to intimidate.

"I meant the collective our. Not me personally. The only reason why the Dark Lord got the support he did was because the Ministry pushed for ward changes on the old manor houses back in the seventies. They didn't think it was fair the ancestral homes allowed magic to be conducted without a trace, when witches and wizards living in muggle areas didn't have that choice."

"Well it isn't fair. How is it fair that I go home every holiday and I can't do magic, but you get to practice because you live in a manor that allows such a thing?"

"Well surely the fix isn't to take our wards away, but to give you better ones. Why shouldn't you be allowed to practice spells in the summer?"

"Because of the statute of secrecy!"

"And you think that's a good idea! All of these regulations limit us."

"No, it keeps muggles safe! If witches and wizards could just go about using magic without regulation, it's muggles who will be in danger. They'll become the play things of the nefarious. It's the primary reason the Ministry exists!"

"I don't know, Ministère des Affaires Magiques de la France have a pretty good 'look the other way policy' about the Statute, I don't see nefarious muggle baiting. Actually." He shrugged, "The few times I've enjoyed the company of some French muggles they seemed very happy."

"You hung out with French muggles?" Her voice softened in disbelief.

"I wouldn't call it 'hanging out'."

She narrowed her eyes, "You hooked up with French muggles. Draco Malfoy?"

"I didn't say anything about sex, Granger, my word. Hornier than a thirteen year old boy you are. And they're not really muggles. They're like your parents. Muggles in the know. Cousins, siblings of witches and wizards like yourself, and their trusted friends. They're more lax about who they let you tell over the channel. Officially, you're only allowed to tell your parents about who you are, right?"

"I could tell my grandparents as well if they were alive. Or siblings if I had them. But yes. Just my parents. But it's only because if everybody could tell whomever they pleased it would be impossible to uphold the Statute."

"And we're upholding the Statute because?"

"Because if we didn't have it, magical folk would have killed muggles! Like they threatened to do, which is how it came about in the first place!"

"They went after us first." He grumbled.

"The witch trials caused the death of far more muggles than it did witches or wizards."

"Because muggles were killing their own kind!" Malfoy laughed exasperated and Hermione rolled her eyes.

"You're simplifying things that can't be simplified." She leaned against the table, she couldn't hide her curiosity, "Now, tell me about these French muggles."

He smirked, leaning against the table too, standing next to her, "Well, the French have a more fluid relationship with the Statute. They don't think it's fair that the ICW dictates that muggle born witches and wizards can't tell their childhood best friends, or cousins, or whatever, that they're magical. They feel that adult witches and wizards should be able to make the call on exposing themselves. And so nobody really gets in trouble for breaking the statute in certain places, at certain times. Last summer I was in Paris during their annual celebration of wizard involvement in the muggle Great War."

Hermione gasped, "But no wizards were involved in Wolrd War I."

"Sure, Granger." He smiled, clearly amused at her apparent ignorance, "So, they have this big party up in the Arc de Triomphe. And there's muggles and witches and wizards and… fun."

"Your parents let you go?"

"They didn't know. I was on a boys trip with Blaise and Theodore for my seventeenth."

"Why did you go? I thought you hated muggles."

"I wouldn't call it hate. I don't understand why we as a society spend so much energy pandering to them. Or why we feel like we have to fit into their world. It would be easier for everyone if we were just allowed to live seperately."

"How would it be easier for me to live seperately to my parents, Malfoy?"

"But that's not what I'm saying. Of course they should be welcomed in our world, they have a witch as a daughter. Just the same as if a witch had a squib as a child."

"Yes, but my parents can't do magic. If we have this seperate magical world away from muggles completely, how would they function in a kitchen where you can only heat a pan with a wand."

"So it's fair to make witches and wizards who live in the muggle world to work kettles and the sort? To deny them the use of their powers to uphold the Statute?"

"At least they have the ability to work electricity! I cannot believe you." She shook her head, "Why did you go to that event? You clearly don't want integration."

He shrugged, "Curious I guess. The Malfoy name means nothing to a muggle. Going to that party felt like going for one of those masquerade balls, just with no silly mask."

"And, so did you hook up with some poor French muggle?" Hermione had been curious about this from the start, but had stopped herself from asking.

"I'm not Goldstein. I don't kiss and tell."

She rolled her eyes, "Describe fun?" He looked at her confused, "You said that there were muggles and witches and wizards and fun?"

"Ahh, well, they have good music, the muggles. They had these men who stand with the big things over their ears and their faces covered?"

"DJs? Don't know about the faces covered though?"

"Yeah. Daft Punk, or something. Music was good, definitely helped by the fact they do indeed have better firewhisky over there. And they had these acrobatic people floating about. Oh and they had those people muggles think can do magic. Card tricks. That was funny. And they served these shots of lust potion."

"What!"

He shrugged, "It was diluted, just for fun. And the muggles didn't have to take it if they didn't want to, don't worry. The muggles there could only attend if they came with a witch or wizard who vouched for them."

"So you took this lust potion?"

"Yeah."

"And?"

He raised his brows but didn't chide her for being curious, "It's… a werid experience. I don't know if I liked it. It's different to a love potion, which obviously makes you feel attracted to someone specific. Lust potion is just making the attraction you feel for someone more intense, so you drop inhibition. And I suppose explore things you wouldn't usually."

"Like?"

He laughed, "We're not on our magic bench, Granger. I don't feel safe saying."

"I told you about Anthony!"

"Yeah, but you didn't tell me specifics. Not that I'm prying." He added quickly, "I've learnt my lesson about asking you about fornicating."

She licked her lips, she didn't know why she felt like she could trust Malfoy with her secrets. Perhaps it's because he was trusting her with his? He almost always answered her questions, without her having to pry and beg, "Fine. I'm tricky. I don't…"

"You don't?"

She gestured agressively with her hand, flourishing as is to say 'go on' hoping for some reason he'd eventually guess it. She grumbled, he clearly was going to make her say it.

"I don't finish."

He was confused for a good ten heart beats, and then, "Oh. Ohhh. Ohhh." He straightened off the desk, "Goldstein that fast?"

"No! No it's not him. I'm weird."

"Sure you are, but not because of that." He smirked, and his lips faltered, and she wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or frown, "What, like, never?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know? How do you not know?"

"Because it feels nice, but then it's not like how porn movies make it look!"

"What movies? Those muggle things with the moving pictures?"

"Ugh. Yes. Porn. They're sex movies."

"Just like… people having sex. Like strangers? You watch that?"

"Well I don't watch them." She said defensively, "I've seen one. I was curious."

"So these are just strangers that have sex and anybody can watch them?"

Unsurprisingly, this teenage boy was stuck on the concept of pornography.

"Well, I wasn't watching to you know, do stuff. I was more watching for academic purposes. I wanted to see what… finishing… usually likes for a girl."

"Yeah but that's different depending on the girl. Also I'm pretty sure there's other things at play there." She glanced at him curiously. He sighed, "Well, sometimes its all screaming and loud."

"That's exactly what it was like in the movie! She sounded like she was going to die if he stopped!"

Malfoy laughed, "I suppose that's what she wanted him to think. I don't know if that's always real. You can tell a little when a girl's faking it."

She smirked, "So you're an expert in the fake finish then, are you Malfoy."

He laughed, "No comment. Like I said, I don't talk about the specifics." It just occured to Hermione that she had in fact been asking Mafloy about his sex life, and she knew one of his partners. As annoying as Parkinson was, it wasn't fair of her to know about her in bed, anymore than Terry and Michael should know what she was like.

"I'm sorry. I don't mean to pry." She swallowed, embarrassed.

"Don't apologise. I won't say anything I'm not comfortable sharing. Though, not that I'm complaining, don't you have girlfriends to talk to about this?"

"Not really. It's all complicated because we're all friends. Michael, Terry, Anthony, Padma, Mandy and I. Which is also why they're annoyed Anthony and I have broken up because I've messed up our 'dynamic'. Anyway, we decided it's too weird to talk about that stuff since we're all close, so we don't. Well clearly Anthony didn't care about that rule." She mumbled, disgrunted. "But, well, I spoke to my mum about it."

"WHAT?" He looked aghast.

"She's very sex positive. Like, weirdly so. Anyway, I didn't tell her specifics. I just asked whether she's heard of someone not being able to… finish. And she said some of her friends take time, and then she gave me these magazines. Ugh." Hermione couldn't stand eighty percent of the articles in them but it was the only place she could actually get information about her situation.

"Wait, is this what Goldstein told Boot and Corner about you?"

She nodded, surprised he managed to piece together the bits of information she had trickled to him.

"That fucker."

"Malfoy!"

"Well it's not exactly polite is it. Merlin, never? You poor thing."

"I'm not a poor thing. Everything isn't about sex. And why do we have to finish. Can't it just be fun and that be okay. Ugh." Hermione buried her face in her hands, re-living every moment Anthony being on top of her and asking her every five seconds if she was feeling good like that could help things at all. "Now, tell me what you did at the sex party!"

"It wasn't a sex party." He rolled his eyes, "I might have been introduced to some fun muggle toys. And that's all I'm saying."

"Oh my god. Draco Malfoy with butt plugs." She covered her mouth.

"There was none of that." He mock glowered at her, "Have you tried those things, for you?"

"Butt plugs. No!"

"Not that." There was less mocking to the glower now. "I meant, the other stuff. The more woman minded things."

"Oh, they wouldn't work in Hogwarts. Technology doesn't work here."

"Yeah but there's magical ones. I don't know the brands, but they exist."

"Oh yeah, that's going to be easy to unwrap at the table at breakfast. Plus I don't know, I had a boyfriend. I shouldn't need to have that assistance."

"Well now that you don't have a boyfriend? Do you need assistance?"

"What are you saying?"

"What am I saying?"

"Are you offering to smuggle sex toys in for me?"

"If that's what you want me to be offering."

She bit her lip. What was he offering?

The door banged open and they both sprang apart, "Oh. I thought Crouch didn't deliver the lesson? Thank you for that by the way Draco, I enjoyed having to pander apologies to that man for ten minutes. You apparently ruined his afternoon plans."

Malfoy cleared his throat, "Sorry Professor Snape."

He sighed, "It's alright. I should have suggested re-arranging the meeting after this morning's activity." He frowned, "What are you two still doing in here?"

"Discussing deparmental structure at the Ministry of Magic. Crouch left his notes." Hermione gestured to the folder in her hands, keeping a straight face so her teacher wouldn't guess they had spent the last ten minutes discussing how she was incapable of achieving an orgasm.

"Ah." Snape gave them an appraising look but didn't say anything further.

"We were also discussing some logistical changes we were thinking about implementing." Hermioned frowned at the boy, what was he talking about. "Granger had the idea of us helping out with detentions, particularly with the younger students. Might free up teacher time."

"Hmm. That's actually a very good idea." Hermione had to stop herself from rolling her eyes, Snape loathed student contact and decreasing that would obviously make him happy. Why was he a teacher? "I'll run it by the next staff meeting. And going forward you two can use this room for planning if you like. Clearly must have magical properties if it prevented you two from ripping each other to pieces.

Hermione avoided Malfoy's eyes, suddenly unsure why having access to this classroom made her feel both nervous and excited.

"I'll contact you within the next week when your next lesson will be, but for the love of Hades Draco, you have to be on time." He nodded, and they left the room.

They walked down the dungeon corridor, "So, what were we saying before Snape got there?"

Hermione bit her lip, not sure whether she wanted to venture back into that conversation. "We were discussing deparmental structure at the Ministry of Magic."

"Ahhh." He caught her request to ignore the last few minutes of their discussion, "Well, I better go and start with that Potions essay."

She nodded, and made to head for the stairs, "Oh, thank you. For the whole detention suggestion, I know you're not a fan of it. But I appreciate the olive branch."

He nodded, and made to turn but stopped when she called out to him.

"I just realised you didn't tell me why you were upset?" She glanced at his bruised knuckles, "You… you and Harry didn't get into a fight, right?"

She tried to keep her voice neutral, but she must have failed because he scowled at her, "No, I didn't fight with your precious Potter. And it's nothing."

"Oh." She folded her arms, feeling like an idiot for telling him her biggest secret when he wouldn't even tell her why he was upset.

"Granger, I don't want to talk about it and get all uppity again. I feel a lot better now. You want all your hard work being nice to me to be dismantled?"

A smile she couldn't help hinted on her face, "It was really hard work. You deserved my ire, I want it noted that I chose peace."

"I'll put it in our meeting notes. Ugh." He grumbled as her face brightened.

"We should have meeting notes! That's a brilliant idea!"

"Yeah, I'm sure the headmaster would love to hear everything we just discussed." He smirked, and left her blushing at his statement, her face only feeling normal again when she was all the way back at Ravenclaw Tower.

A/N: Thank you for reading! Hope you enjoyed that! Feedback will be much appreciated!