Caelus wakes up. He immediately recognizes that he's still on the space station, but…
…Why is he lying down on a bench? Did they really have no other place to put him?
He immediately feels a camera on him. Turning his head, he sees March 7th with her streaming glasses on.
Seeing him awake, March smiles, "Oh! Good morning- Chat, you say it too!"
Ah, he gets it, he woke up so quickly because of the power of the stream.
Obviously that wasn't weird at all.
March's chat:
August 30th: Good morning!
Herta's #1 Fan: It's time…
0bama: Good Morning. Thanks for saving us.
Wolfy (MOD): He has woketh. Series isn't canceled!
Standing up, Caelus asks her, "So, how long was I out for?"
"Uh, about a day," March answered, "Since your whole outburst killed the Doomsday Beast, you've been asleep."
…Okay, wow, so they really didn't have anywhere else to put him other than the bench.
Charitably ignoring that, Caelus decided to ask another question, "Alright… So what happened to all of the other invaders?"
Knowing he would like this next part, March smiled as she mentioned, "Miss Herta made it on time and totally destroyed the entire invasion force on her own! The power of an emanator is really scary…"
Predictably, Caelus's expression lit up.
With the subtlety of a lion in the arctic, Caelus immediately asked, "Where is she now?"
March thinks about it for a second before answering, "I think she's talking with Himeko not far from here… She wanted you to go find her, by the way. Let's exchange beacons in case we want to talk again, alright?"
So, they quickly do that. Caelus wasn't sure where his phone came from, but he had it now so who cared?
After the pleasantries were over, Caelus immediately announced, "She asked for me. I will be there."
He was thinking about Herta, not Himeko.
Then, he began to walk away.
Entrophy: FOLLOW HIM
August 30th: FOLLOW HIM
Herta's #1 Fan: KILL HIM
March sighed at the antics of her chat, "We have something else to do, guys, remember?"
There were dozens of people that were still injured, and March was assisting in helping the space station get back to peak condition again.
Not that it mattered to everyone here.
Yugo: If you don't follow I'm unfollowing.
Caelus Agenda Pusher: March this is the most important thing you will ever do in your life FOLLOW HIM
Welt Yang (MOD): Follow him.
"You too, Mr. Yang?!" March gasped in shock by his appearance in her chat, "Ugh, fine, I'll follow him…"
So, March follows right behind him.
Because of Caelus and the invasion, March got a massive boost in her viewership, basically tripling it. The whole Aeon being recorded on screen for the first time in a million years hasn't caught on yet, but March had a bet with Dan Heng that it'll probably be found out sooner or later.
Much to Caelus's disappointment, Himeko was standing off looking out in the distance all by herself.
As March stood and watched from the railing nearby, and Caelus approached her, Himeko noticed them, "Oh, you're awake. How was your sleep?"
He charitably and heroically ignored the fact that he was sleeping upon a bench and answered, "I slept well. Do you know where Herta is?"
Himeko knowingly smiled as she answered, "Funny, I was actually waiting here for one of her dolls to show up. In fact, she should be showing up right… Now."
His Herta senses fully made him aware of the goddess that just turned the corner.
The small and beautiful doll of the greatest woman in the universe robotically yet elegantly walked towards him.
Herta's #1 Fan: It's her! Actually moving! I waited so long for this!
Silencio: Aww, it's her doll again.
Caelus Agenda Pusher: CAELUS MY GOAT SAY SOMETHING YOUR WIFE IS HERE!
Before he realized it, she began speaking, "I wasn't gone for that long, was I? Yet the space station is already in this kind of state…"
He would remember it for the rest of his life, just like with every sentence Herta speaks.
"Welcome back, Herta-" Himeko managed to say before Caelus began speaking.
"Hi, dear," Caelus said with a smitten expression on his face.
With a deadpan look, Herta immediately asked, "Care to elaborate?"
"We're husband and wife."
"Himeko, I don't want him."
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: TOTAL REJECTION
Herta's #1 Fan: As expected.
Doppelganger: NOOOOOOOOOO
Hoppy: THIS IS CONSIDERABLY WORSE THAN THE ENTIRE SWARM DISASTER
Wolfy (MOD): INSANE REACTION!
Sinatra: I just joined today for the Aeon thing. Why are we surprised about this?
March nearly teared up when Herta totally rejected him, "Oh no! Caelus, hang in there!"
After all, being rejected by your supposed wife must be one of the most painful things in the universe! Well, in March's romantic mind sensing abilities, anyway.
Surprisingly, Caelus took it well, "It's okay, sweetheart."
"Never call me that again," Was the immediate response.
Amused by the situation, Himeko decided to speak up, "Well, for all of the people in March's chat, this is the true master of the space station. Genius Society number 83, Herta."
Rzack: Isn't that the Erudition cult with all of those evil scientists?
Terastol: Most of them are evil but a lot of them are good. I live on Planet Screwllum and he's a pretty chill guy.
Hakon: The reason why we can all speak to each other is because of someone from the Genius Society.
Ovalion: The reason why people are being turned into monkeys is because of someone from the Genius Society. Win some, lose some.
Taking mild offense at Himeko's words, Herta asked, "When you introduce me, why don't you use some of my more impressive achievements?"
Wholeheartedly on her side, Caelus threw his hat into the ring, "Yeah, why not? I want to know more about her."
Herta somehow looked even more disappointed, "You're calling yourself my husband but you don't even know what I do?"
With a gentle smile, he responded, "I got amnesia just so I could hear of your feats and meet you for the first time all over again."
"You've never met me before," She pointed out.
Foxian Wonder: Caelus is getting cooked, man. I can't bear to watch…
Guliherme: Our definitions of that word must be different because he's taking this rather well.
Meme Man: This is comedy gold though ngl.
AlienAlienSpaceAlien: March please get closer I want to see every detail on their FACES you hear me?
Then, Himeko decided to try and move the conversation forward, "So… If you two are done, this is Caelus, he has the stellaron inside of him."
Herta's interest slightly piqued before remembering who has it, "Well, I wasn't using that Stellaron, so it's not a big loss to let you have it… I'll have to take a closer look at you to figure out how that ended up working."
Considering that stellarons are considered cancers that would end up tearing apart anyone that got too close to them, it was a miracle that Caelus wasn't a puddle of fleshy goo somewhere on the floor.
Herta's first thought was that it had to do with Nanook making an appearance by lending his gaze on Caelus, but that didn't seem to line up. But she'll figure it out later, no doubt.
"It is impressive that someone managed to stabilize a Stellaron inside a person's body, though," Herta remarked, looking at the Stellaron holder, "It must take someone special to…"
Caelus's expression lit up.
Immediately, she tempers his emotions, "Why would you think I'm talking about you? You're not that special. I could recreate it if I wanted to with a baby."
Of course, Herta was just bluffing. She probably could, but she didn't care enough to actually try attempting that.
"Of course you can," Caelus said with the utmost confidence, "Though, what happens to me now?"
Himeko said, "It's mostly up to you, whether you want to stay here or to travel with us on the Astral Express."
"It's not up to you," Herta bluntly said, "Get on the Astral Express."
Caelus Agenda Pusher: WINNING AND LOSING AT THE SAME TIME!
Qingque: I've only been shipping Caelus & Herta for 5 minutes but I feel like I've lost a lifetime
Mirrond: New Trailblazer tho?
Despite wanting to be with Herta for the rest of his life, Caelus had no choice but to accept the wishes of his beloved.
After all, sometimes, no just means no.
Himeko chuckles, making her stance on the relationship between the two clear.
In favor of shipping.
"Didn't you mention how you needed someone more worthy to test out the Simulated Universe?" Himeko mentioned, gaining Herta's interest, "Someone with a Stellaron inside of them will surely have much more effectiveness than any other researcher."
Herta mulls over this for a second, "Well, it is true. I do want to do some research with him just because of the Stellaron, even if his personality is… Ew."
Caelus makes his voice clear as he declares, "I will gladly test out the simulated universe."
He has no idea what the Simulated Universe is. In fact, he doesn't even have a concept of an idea of what the Simulated Universe is. It is literally just 2 words to him.
Plaza: What in Lucifer's name is the Simulated Universe?
August 30th: The Simulated Universe is a Simulated Universe, duh.
Cogs: We will likely get an explanation on what it is soon, then, since obviously none of us knows it.
Herta has the most cringed out expression on her face. She does not speak, but she makes her position clear.
Every sentence that Caelus utters leads to his reputation going down in her eyes.
Himeko hummed, telling Herta, "If he doesn't bring satisfactory results, you can always leave him with us."
"You're taking him anyways, I don't want him here," Herta immediately said, not leaving any room for negotiation.
The mechanic of the Astral Express shrugs and accepts her proposal, "That's fine with us. Caelus can stay with you for a few hours before we depart. We can always come back if you want Caelus for longer."
"Can I?" Caelus excitedly asked, leaning towards Herta with an enthusiastic look on his face.
"That works with me," Herta said, although she said that in the most unenthusiastic way possible, "Come to my office. I can scan your body and send you into the Simulated Universe at the same time."
Wolfy (MOD): HE'S WINNING! CAETA SHIPPERS WE ARE SO BACK!
Meme Man: This is so peak.
Zoomies: WE DID IT CHAT! OFFICE DATE!
Herta's #1 Fan: Herta's office?! I've never been there before!
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: HEY #2 FAN TAKE THE L!
Typhus: We've reached it… Sobot Rex.
Wolfy (MOD): And that's a 24 hour timeout cuz I CAN'T STOP WINNING!
"I will be there," Caelus said, waiting for the conversation to end so he could leave.
Himeko simply nodded, "Then we'll be waiting for you."
Herta said nothing, giving him the permission to start walking (sprinting) towards her office.
Doppelganger: Follow him.
Caelus Agenda Pusher: Follow him!
0bama: Follow him.
March, leaning over the railing on the elevated platform, immediately asked the doll, "Can we go watch Caelus too?"
"That's not how it works," Was the immediate reply.
Responder: NOOOOOOOO
Ovalion: THIS IS CONSIDERABLY WORSE THAN THE FIRST AND SECOND MECHANICAL EMPEROR'S WAR COMBINED
Qingque: MY TIME WAS WASTED. WASTED!
The Alt: GIVE US OUR SOBOT REX!
Wolfy (MOD): No alts to skirt punishment allowed and THIS IS WORSE THAN I EXPECTED!
March drearily sighed, "That sucks."
No doubt her view count was about to tank now that her half the fun is gone.
Back to Caelus, he looked confusedly at the massive machine before turning to his wife, "I don't know what I'm looking at."
Herta smiled with pride, seemingly forgetting Caelus's impression of her as she explained the entire Simulated Universe to him.
The collaboration between fellow geniuses, searching for the truth behind the Aeons, and how there was an entire universe inside that machine.
Happy that his wife was happy with her fixation, he nodded along as though he perfectly understood it all.
Then, Herta said, "So, because none of us geniuses can really get the attention of any other Aeons other than the Aha the Elation or Nous the Erudition on our own, we've had to use other means to try and lure them to us. But we're almost always busy, so we've roped in other people here to test it for us. It's worked an astonishingly small number of times. We haven't even seen some Aeons even once yet."
Pointing at where Caelus's Stellaron is, she explained, "Because you have a Stellaron inside of you, we're trying out disguising you as an Aeon. After all, Aeons are probably more likely to talk to other Aeons, right? We've tried to disguise ourselves as Nous, the Erudition, in the past, but it didn't really work out. You might be different because of the Stellaron inside of you."
That part, he understood, and was a bit curious about, asking, "So, who am I going to be disguised as?"
Herta hummed for a second before deciding, "Akivili, the Trailblaze, probably. You are going to be a Trailblazer soon, after all, if you decide to join them."
Tilting his head, Caelus asked, "What group are you part of, and can I join that instead?"
Herta found that more amusing than sad, "I'm part of the Genius Society, and I'm 83rd member. Only Nous, the Erudition, can invite members who have made great leaps in the scientific field or have great potential to advance it… And you aren't either of those."
"I can do it."
"No, you can't."
"Okay, you're right, I can't."
With him on her side, Herta continued, "So, just go stand over there and the machine will take a scan of your body and transfer your consciousness inside the Simulated Universe. I'll guide you through it, so you don't have to be afraid of anything."
Caelus completely understood that part.
But before he walked towards the machine, he felt a strange, mystical, and downright bizarre urge inside of his body. That odd feeling that if he did not scratch that itch, his existence was meaningless. The knowledge that if he did not ask, he would essentially be committing suicide.
"Hey, is it possible to livestream the Simulated Universe?" Caelus asked, voice filled with anticipation and hope.
Hearing March talk about her own stream inspired Caelus to have his own stream due to how fun it seemed to March. But he needed a niche to base his channel upon, otherwise, he would be behind March for all of 10 minutes before his superior wit and humor would take her over. Caelus can't have that, he needs instant gratification to feel like streaming was the right choice to make for himself.
Also, streaming just sounded cool.
It was mostly because he thought being a streamer would be cool.
"Well, it's surprising that you asked that just now," Herta sounded surprised as she said the words she was saying, "It came to me in a dream the other night to install a streaming function into the Simulated Universe. So, lucky you, you get to stream to the entire universe about my project."
For some reason, the image of a trash can flashes through Caelus's mind.
But anyway, Caelus's jaw dropped with awe as he excitedly thought of the countless views he and Herta would achieve together as husband and wife.
"The channel name is untitled for now, but I can change it right now for you," Herta said, pointing to a conveniently placed screen nearby, likely the result of that same dream.
Thinking about it very hard, there was only one choice for the name of that channel.
"Streaming with Caelus (Ft. Herta)"
"How did you even pronounce… Ah, whatever. I don't care," Herta sighed as the channel name changed to Caelus (Ft. Herta), "The other part of the name didn't fit. The IPC really needs to work on their products, a lot of it sucks."
Feeling as though something massive and important was accomplished today, Caelus bows to the love of his life, "Thank you, my love. You give my life meaning."
"Just get in the Simulated Universe before I change my mind."
Getting used to the Simulated Universe, which felt like real life, but simulated, Caelus marvels at the ingenuity displayed by his wife.
He was inside another part of the space station, it looked like. But Caelus knew that it wasn't actually part of the space station because he trusted his wife that the Simulated Universe actually worked and wasn't a big prank.
It was indistinguishable from reality, but it was all just inside a machine. His wife really is the smartest person in the whole universe. Nous the Erudition who?
Dan Heng & March 7th are there too, but their voices are muted by Herta as she explains that they're copies made from his brain to help him fight.
He didn't even know that he was going to fight inside the Simulated Universe.
"So, I've booted up the stream and told my followers on the Interastral Communication Universal Portal about it," Herta said, her little avatar appearing in front of him, "It should be appearing in front of you any second now."
In an instant, his chat appears in front of him, following his vision and filling him with glee.
Caelus's Chat:
Aha: Holy Shit
March 7th: Holy Shit
Wolfy: Wow. It's a room?
Cogs: Simulated Universe indeed… Very interesting.
Cthu: Herta is such a genius! The Genius Society is so much better than the Intelligentsia Guild…
Caelus Agenda Pusher: CAELUS YOU DID IT! YOU'RE MY GOAT! THE GOAT!
Hoppy: Maybe I'm just stupid but I don't get it.
He could even make other screens pop up in his vision as he telepathically commanded the stream to show his camera, which was apparently Herta's avatar, his views and subscribers, which were all skyrocketing to the thousands, and all of the other things you would find on the Interastral Sharing Website.
It should've been millions and billions, but considering Herta posts once an Amber Era, it's probably a miracle anyone saw her latest tweet.
Seeing the flood of questions in his chat, Caelus happily introduces what's happening, "Hey guys, welcome to our channel. My wife, Herta, made this Simulated Universe to study the Aeons in our universe, and I'm helping her with contacting them."
Chrome: Herta's husband?
Terastol: If he's still saying that, maybe it's true lol.
Foxian Wonder: Wait, but studying the Aeons how?
The avatar of Herta took on a deadpan stare as she clarified, "I'm not his wife, that's just what he's saying. I've already given up on him, you should too."
Caelus moves on without losing steam, "I haven't been told what I should do yet, though, so hopefully she can explain it a bit better."
Seeing Caelus expectantly turn towards her, Herta decided to speak up, "Well, if you're wondering where I am, my avatar is the camera. Like Caelus said, I've been working on a project with my colleagues in the Genius Society to create a Simulated Universe to study the Aeons. You'll see how later. Or maybe not. I don't have much faith in him. Anyway, do you see that monster from the Antimatter Legion over there?"
Herta's avatar turns toward the little Baryons floating about.
Wolfy: I think I'm getting what she's putting down.
Ovalion: How does murder study the Aeons?
Typhus: Please be through porn.
Wolfy (MOD): Annnnd banned.
Responder: How did you get mod?
Wolfy (MOD): Don't worry about it.
Aha (MOD): Don't worry about it.
Wolfy (MOD): ?what?
Continuing the explanation, she elaborates, "You're disguised as Akivili, the Trailblaze. If you create enough commotion, you should be making yourself a beacon of imaginary energy, enough so that other Aeons will take notice. Then, once you lure them to us, we can record what happens and we can study that. If something goes wrong, it's all simulated anyway! It's perfect, right?"
Cogs: That sounds right on paper, but it's a stretch to call it perfect.
Cthu: It is perfect!
Broken Legs: Can we translate this into stupid people language please.
AlienAlienSpaceAlien: It's probably just better if we watch what happens.
Caelus accepts this completely, "It is perfect, my genius. So I just have to fight?"
"Yep, now I'll unmute your friends' voices so you can work together in combat," Herta said, floating behind Caelus, "I'll explain the other things about the Simulated Universe when we get to it."
March immediately speaks up, "Alright Caelus, ready for another fight? Hopefully your Stellaron doesn't almost blow up like last time…"
Tilting his head, Caelus asked, "Is it weird that you know you're not real?"
Dan Heng simply said, "We got used to it."
"Oh."
March 7th: I did NOT get used to it! At least I'm not yet!
Dan Heng: It's a bit weird, but it's pretty normal for a genius.
Silencio: How did Herta even get their data in the first place? Did they go inside the machine earlier too?
The Herta (MOD): I scanned them from Caelus's brain.
Herta's #1 Fan: How are you speaking here but also in your avatar there?
The Herta (MOD): Aren't you one of the scientists that work at my space station? You can figure it out.
Before heading into battle, Caelus took a look at chat to talk with them, "It is a pretty weird situation, isn't it, March, Dan Heng?"
The March and Dan Heng next to them confusedly muttered, "What?"
"I meant the real ones."
"Oh."
March 7th: That's weird.
Dan Heng: That's weird.
With that concluded, Caelus pointed his bat toward his enemy, "Now we fight!"
Caelus and Dan Heng rushed down the swarm of Bayrons with their weapons as March fired icicles at them.
Now, this was the Simulated Universe. You know how this goes.
They were basically annihilated in seconds as Bayrons disappeared with a few swings of their weapons.
As Caelus defeated the last Bayron, he was filled with a sense of accomplishment.
But before he could even read chat or ask Herta for praise, he suddenly blanked out.
A moment later, he appears in the middle of space, vast and open.
Herta's avatar looked surprised as she amazedly remarked, "On your first go?!"
Hakon: What's happening?
Mephy: I honestly understand nothing.
Cogs: Oh? Is this actually working?
Chorus: Is this that thing Herta was talking about?
The space around him hardens as the color of darkness turns into amber. Various ores, some extremely abundant, some that have never been seen in centuries, rain down towards the planet below him. A form manifests itself above Caelus, amber coalescing and a giant hand holding a massive hammer, but he had to blink before he understood what was in front of him.
Qilpoth, the Aeon of Preservation.
Wolfy (MOD): Oh wow, that's actually just Qilpoth.
August 30th: OH MY GOD.
0bama: OH MY GOD.
Guilherme: I found my next background pic for the next hundred years.
Entrophy: This is simulated?
The Alt: Holy shit.
Screwllum: Attracting Aeon on your first try is very good, Caelus. Well done.
There is a huge roar around THEM. Instantly, Caelus recognizes it as a warning for him. But why? He had no idea.
Suddenly, without another sign, THEY departed, leaving only amber and other ores as proof that the Aeon of Preservation once stood there.
Cogs: Welp, he's gone. Didn't even stay for 15 seconds.
Red-Haired: Still an impressive sight!
Totally the Finality: Bet you I can beat his ass.
Foxian Wonder: Dude genuinely thinks he can beat THAT Aeon no way.
Herta excitedly floated over to Caelus's side as she explained, "This is great! Our calculations were correct. Qilpoth the Preservation really appeared here. I put you in an area where he was more likely to appear, but to think you would attract him on your first try… Well, I suppose a revived version of Akivili, Qilpoth's old friend, would eventually attract him, even if it took a while."
Caelus ingested the words, before asking, "Wait, revived?"
"Oh, right, you might not know this, but Akivili is missing, probably dead," Herta off-handedly mentioned, "Anyway, he seemed to have noticed something was off if that roar was anything to go by. It muddles our data a bit, but what can you do? It's a Simulated Universe and we have to get the Aeons to us somehow."
Caelus slowly nodded, getting all of that inside his head.
Then, he asked, "So, that's not the actual Aeon, right? But you're sure it acts like the actual Aeon?"
Herta's Avatar nodded, "Yep. What you saw was a carefully cultivated simulation of an Aeon made by Ruan Mei, another member of the Genius Society. She's managed to create the real paths inside of the simulation, and connected these simulated Aeons into those paths. Because Aeons don't really have free will and can only do things dictated by their paths, we can be sure that they act as real as possible. Additionally, because it's a simulation, they're powerless so they can't do anything to harm you. We can also tamper with their settings a bit if we have to."
With a click of her tongue, Caelus is brought back to the room he was just in where March and Dan Heng were waiting for him, Herta continuing, "Now that our calculations were proven correct, you can continue onward. Next time that an Aeon comes, try to get something from THEM, alright?"
Not knowing how to do that, Caelus asks, "But what do I say to them? You know more about it than I do, right?"
"Anything will do!" Herta annoyedly said, "They're coming to you, you can do anything you want and they'll at least hear you out for a second! Now get a move on!"
It was a strange experience, to say for certain. He hadn't expected that meeting a simulated Aeon would involve him being randomly teleported to space, but maybe that was on him.
Either way, it was an exciting experience, and if it would help Herta achieve her dreams, then he would keep doing it.
Aha (MOD): Stone head left without doing anything exciting. When is a more exciting Aeon coming? Like the Elation?
Zoomies: I knew that working for the IPC was the right choice. What other Aeon looks as majestic as that?
Cthu: Ruan Mei made that? They really do deserve their titles.
Caelus Agenda Pusher: AND MY BOY CAELUS WALKS OUT OF AN ENCOUNTER WITH AN AEON ALIVE! THAT'S MY GOAT!
Suddenly, Caelus gets a pop-up. He could choose between three blessings of preservation.
He had no idea what that meant.
Herta, choosing mercy, decided to explain it to him, "See, it eventually got to a point where regular humans didn't produce enough imaginary energy to attract Aeons. So we're increasing your simulated power level through these blessings so that we can increase the difficulty of the simulated enemies, increasing how much imaginary energy you can output to attract the Aeons. Plus, this way, it becomes more like a game, incentivizing people to work harder to experience all of the different blessings."
"Working for you is all the incentive I need, though," Caelus brought up, fully meaning it.
Herta's avatar took on an unimpressed look, "If you don't get another Aeon encounter today, I'm permanently kicking you out of here."
"That's okay," Caelus easily accepted, pointing forward with the baseball bat, "If I can't meet your expectations, I don't deserve your love at all."
"You don't even have my love in the first place."
Caelus conveniently doesn't hear that one.
Responder: Simp behavior
Terastol: I would too ngl.
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: You miss every shot that you don't take
Yugo: Dude he missed every shot that he took and got hit back with a rocket launcher.
Noticing what his chat was saying, Caelus decided to chip in, "I'm already married so I don't think it counts for me."
Silencio: IT DEFINITELY COUNTS FOR YOU
The Alt: Schrodinger's marriage.
Meme Man: Genius Society ahh response.
"You're just jealous," Caelus responded, turning to his simulated comrades, "Alright, you guys are fine, right? So let's go!"
Dan Heng and March gave their approval as they walked down the hallway to find more enemies.
Finding another Antimatter Legion goon, the Nameless trio immediately jumped it from behind.
Short story short, they win.
Without any other Aeon showing up, Caelus immediately gets the option to select another blessing, which he does so immediately.
Seeing his failure to attract an Aeon, Herta sighed in resignation, "Figures. It must've just been beginner's luck that you attracted Qilpoth on your first try."
August 30th: Wife is mad D;
Sinatra: He's still in the tutorial! There's more chances for beginner's luck to occur!
Screwllum: Given the variable of the Stellaron, it may not be beginner's luck, but I shall leave this in her hands.
Terastol: Wait, are you like… The actual Screwllum?
Screwllum: I am, yes.
Terastol: DUDE YOU OWN THE PLANET I LIVE ON.
Not missing a beat, he responded, "I'll turn that beginner's luck into my own luck. I'll definitely get an Aeon encounter in our next fight."
Herta's avatar impatiently moved forward just a bit as she said, "Alright, we're going to brute force this a bit. Caelus, get ready for three waves of enemies."
He stupidly blinked, "Three?"
In the blink of an eye, 3 Bayrons suddenly surrounded the trio.
Jumping into action, Caelus swings his bat, knocking out two while Dan Heng spears the other one into oblivion.
A second later, three Voidrangers jumped into action from out of nowhere.
March conjured a shield on Caelus, blocking the hits of two Voidrangers as he swung forward, damaging them greatly.
Dan Heng dodges an attack as he knocks one of the Voidrangers down to the floor, where it was shot to death by March.
Meanwhile, Caelus was struck again by the Voidrangers, but due to the blessings of preservation, their attacks swung back at them and a light tap from him sent them back to the void.
Then the last wave consisting of five enemies came, and Caelus immediately felt the urge to show off in front of his wife.
"Rules… Are meant to be broken!"
Feeling the energy of his wife and the blessings of preservation, Caelus swings his bat once, bringing all of his enemies to their knees.
Normally, he probably should've only been able to hit three, but with the power of love, anything was possible.
The battle came to a close as new blessings appeared in front of Caelus, with no Aeon in sight.
Herta clicked her tongue in slight irritation, "That's fine, there's a chance for them to show up after you choose a blessing. Now hurry it up."
His first attempt doesn't lead anywhere.
"Come on…" Herta muttered out.
His second attracts nothing.
"Darn it…" Caelus and Herta both breathed out at the same time.
THEY do not respond to the third set of blessings either.
"Well, that was a bust," Herta resignedly said, "Brute forcing it didn't work."
Ruan Mei: Didn't I tell you that if we edited the simulation too much, it would make it clear to the Aeons something was wrong?
Screwllum: Conclusion: editing the Simulated Universe during testing is detrimental to our efforts.
Cthu: RUAN MEI IS HERE TOO? I STANNNN
Screwllum: Her account was made yesterday. But yes that is her.
Terastol: Conveniently ignoring how your own account was made 12 Amber Eras ago, I see…
Reading his chat, Caelus immediately comforted her, "It's okay. You thought something might be different this time. There's no shame in trying."
Herta's avatar narrowed her eyes, "Did you think I needed comfort? But still, I should apologize. I was a bit too eager for success because of how rare it is to get an Aeon to show up at all, and I wanted to bring out your potential… It must've been a coincidence. I won't interfere again, so play as you like, there's just one boss left so take care of him and you can leave."
Putting his hand on his chest, Caelus told her, "You don't have to apologize. I'll prove to you it wasn't just a coincidence, and live up to what you see in me."
"...Sure, believe what you want," Herta said, more upbeat than her previous words, "We can talk more about it later."
Caelus Agenda Pusher: Caeta shippers it's HAPPENING!
Doppelganger: SHE'S WARMING UP TO HIM!
Qingque: WE USED TO PRAY FOR TIMES LIKE THIS!
The Herta (Mod): You're all heathens.
Putting his bat on his shoulder, Caelus rallied his simulated comrades, "We'll fight this Trampler in the name of Herta!"
"She really can do no wrong, huh…" March awkwardly pointed out, scratching her cheek.
Caelus nodded, moving forward, "Because she can't."
Dan Heng just sighed, moving next to Caelus, ready to fight.
Walking into the main lobby of the Space Station, they found the Voidranger Trampler standing tall, ready to fight.
With a roar of his own, Caelus leapt into battle, foot first.
Landing on the Trampler's back, Caelus immediately began hitting the Trampler on the back of its head.
The Trampler attempts to use its hands to hit him off, but Dan Heng and March impale and freeze its hands respectively to stop them.
As the Trampler was gaining concussion after concussion, it realized it could just do a flip to throw Caelus off.
Caelus fell to the floor, but March's shield hit the floor harder, which conveniently sent the shock of that fall towards the neck of the Trampler.
With that, the Trampler was stunned for a brief moment as everyone knew instinctively what to do.
"Everyone! All together now!"
With that, everyone began to chant their signature moves.
"Rules are made to be broken!"
"This sanctuary is but a vision… Break!"
"Check out this awesome move!"
With the power of a baseball bat, a spear, and a bunch of ice, the Trampler effectively blows up.
They have defeated the final boss.
Hakon: So why do they say those move names anyway?
Mirrond: Style points
Doppelganger: It sounds cool!
Waiting for something to show up, Caelus and Herta wait for a long moment.
But nothing came.
A deep sigh comes out of Herta's avatar, "I was really hoping for one of them to appear… Nevermind, I'll switch off the Simulated Universe, then. It won't hurt, so don't worry about it."
Simply nodding, Caelus patiently waits for him to be transported into reality.
Then, a gasp, "No way…!"
He blinks, suddenly finding himself in space once more.
Cogs: Simply Magnificent
Screwllum: It is a repeat, but perhaps THEY will be more receptive to speak than the last time.
AlienAlienSpaceAlien: The Genius Society continues to amaze me.
His vision is filled up by countless mirror fragments, forming a human-like figure in front of him. Despite having such a look, Caelus couldn't see their face.
Countless, incomplete memories pour into his head, springing up before his eyes.
Kafka, her body stretched and deformed like a reflection in water. Holding an umbrella, she moves away from him. Where is she going? He doesn't actually care that much.
He blinks, finding himself in the position of an Adlivun baby with an uncut umbilical cord. There's a golden scar on him, with gold flowing out of the dying planet.
Again, he blinks, finding himself as a robed shadow traveling across the abyss, reaching out to catch countless shooting stars.
This was Fuli, the Remembrance.
Sinatra: Wait wtf that's my Aeon. DID I JUST MEET MY GOD FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A RANDOM LIVESTREAM?
Broken Legs: So what did we just see anyway?
Chrome: a Stellaron Hunter, Kafka, and some weird golden guy? No clue, this is for Herta to figure out.
THEY suddenly began to speak, "The robe flutters and wraps around your dark skin, you laugh at exploration. The silk threads spin, overlap, and weave into oceanic words…"
Every word they say is connected to each other like a whisper. It felt… Beautiful, in a way.
Hoppy: THEY can actually speak?!
The Alt: NGL I thought they couldn't either.
Entrophy: BUT WHAT ARE THEY TALKING ABOUT?
Blinking again, he sees… Well, garbage, probably.
Before Caelus could respond to anything, he blinked once more.
All that was left was the memory of the Aeon.
"We did it!" Herta shouted with more excitement and expressiveness than Caelus had ever seen her with, "That was Fuli, the Remembrance. They thought you were the fallen Akivili, so they tried starting a conversation with you. You did fumble the conversation part, though. You forgot to say something."
Caelus sheepishly scratched his hair, apologizing for his sins, "I'm sorry, it caught me off guard."
"Ah, it doesn't matter," Herta was still happy about just the Aeon speaking, "Fuli in particular is valuable for our research on the Aeons because they have the memories of all beings and know almost as much about everything as Nous does!"
Happily humming, she began to float into the air, "Alright, I'll shut off the Simulated Universe. I might not be fully on board with your personality, but you're the one I've been looking for to test the Simulated Universe on a regular basis! Okay, ready to leave?"
Nodding, Caelus brightly smiled as she told her, "Herta, you're more cute when you're happy."
The Simulated Universe immediately shuts off, turning off the stream with it.
Herta's puppet was a tiny bit more reserved than her avatar in the Simulated Universe as she told him, "That was a massive success, Caelus! Two Aeons in such a short timespan… If Stephen wasn't watching that stream, I'll have to tell him right away!"
"Who's Stephen?" Caelus curiously asked, not finding that name in his stream chat.
"He's the 84th member of the Genius Society," Herta off-handedly said, "He's a bit of an introvert, so he doesn't show up much. But he's in charge of making the Simulated Universe more fun to testers, so you should thank him if you ever get the chance."
Considering that the Simulated Universe felt pretty real, aside from the boost of power he gained from the blessings, he doesn't really understand what Stephen's role was in the Simulated Universe.
That being said, she recommended him to thank him later, so he will do so.
Lightly clearing her throat, Herta continues on, "Anyway, that was just the first part of the tutorial. You can always take the other part of the tutorial after you come back from the Astral Express, but…"
Caelus looks at Herta patiently, waiting for her to finish.
"Yeah, you can go straight in," Herta knowingly grinned, "There's the other half of the tutorial waiting for you. The stream is still active."
Caelus immediately walks into the machine.
Used to the Simulated Universe now, Caelus looks around the area where the Trailblaze trio were standing in. on a platform somewhere else in Herta's Space station.
So, when they saw a Bayron floating on the bridge nearby, he had no hesitation as he declared, "Alright, let's move out!"
Hakon: Oh wow, it hasn't been a full minute since he got back into the Simulated Universe.
Zoomies: Wonder why he went back in so soon.
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: BECAUSE CAELUS IS THE GOAT AND THE PROOF IS RIGHT HERE! HE ALREADY BEAT THOSE BAYRONS!
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: Oh wait wrong account. I MEANT THAT THOSE BAYRONS ARE BUMS!
As Caelus puts down the last Bayron, he suddenly gets pulled into space again.
Chills creep up his spines, mist clouds his eyes, and he sees glass forming into a familiar figure once more.
This time, Fuli, the Remembrance, was closer than he was before. He could fully feel their presence and power. Floating mid-air, they bow their head from above. They seem to be looking at him, but he's not sure where their eyes could be.
Sinatra: YOOOO I KNEW MY AEON WAS AWESOME LIKE THAT.
Cthu: How nice of Fuli to show up twice!
Knowing that this was his opportunity to make Herta happy, Caelus immediately told the Aeon, "What a coincidence to meet you again!"
Herta's #1 Fan: Your response sucked.
Doppelganger: I wouldn't have thought of anything better to say tbh.
After hearing him, Fuli responds, "Chaos turns into time, your dereliction of duty will pass, the volume is no longer proportional, the steps are reduced, one steps, two steps, three feet, away from everything, be careful, the Elio train moves forward, the baby falls to the ground, the cancer is growing…"
Every word that the Aeon of Remembrance speaks further intensifies the chills on his body as he shivers from the cold.
But then, they draw away and disappear in an instant. He feels both relieved and pity that they departed so soon.
Hearing Herta's happy voice perks him right up, though, "You met Fuli again, well done. Previous testers never even got a response from Fuli!"
Considering it a job well done, Caelus mentally pats himself on the back. His wife was better when she was happy.
"I'll try to ask Fuli something better next time," He said, looking to where the Aeon once was, "I kind of just blurted out the first thing in my mind, and it wasn't that good."
Calming her voice down, Herta's avatar rolled her eyes, "Oh, who cares? Just the fact that you managed to speak to THEM is an accomplishment. You can brainstorm what to ask them next time."
"Can we brainstorm together?"
"No."
AlienAlienSpaceAlien: oof
Red-Haired: Swing and a miss…
Aha (MOD): Yikies.
Wolfy (MOD): also seriously who r u why won't it let me DM you.
Sighing, Herta's avatar pointed her floating pen towards a device nearby, "There's a Downloader just a little further ahead. You can use it to add someone else from your memories into your team. Your brain is gradually adapting to the Simulated Universe, and the available RAM will gradually become more accessible for you so you can play with more people. Alright, now go pick your blessing."
Nodding, Caelus ended up just picking the blessing with the highest amount of stars on it, which was 3.
After that Caelus immediately walks towards the downloader, which was being guarded by some of the Antimatter Legion minions.
But before that, Caelus ended up smashing a vat of green goo or whatever, entirely out of habit.
Guilherme: I think I saw a murder.
Doppelganger: What did that poor… thing, do to you?
THE SLANDER AGENDA!: Can't believe I'm following the perspective of a TERRORIST.
"Uh, why did you do that, Caelus?" March questioned as they stared at the broken glass on the floor.
"I had to," Caelus tried, but March wasn't buying it.
Fortunately, his wife stepped in.
"Stephen added a bunch of breakable objects into the Simulated Universe," Herta off-handedly mentioned, also staring at the shattered glass and green gas that was now oozing from it, "He said that ransacking and smashing things are two essential experiences in games. So, if it's fun, he'll keep adding these breakable objects nearby."
So basically, Caelus was justified.
"Thank you, Stephen," Caelus smiled as he looked into the sky, unsure of where Stephen was.
"Stephen is probably watching the stream," Herta pointed out.
Caelus looked towards her avatar, "I can only think about you when I look at your avatar."
"You shouldn't."
Caelus Agenda Pusher: Honestly goated behavior.
AlienAlienSpaceAlien: If Herta won't take him, can I have him?
Hakon: Thank you Stephen!
After that, Caelus and the trio marched toward the Antimatter Legion with fire in their eyes.
Zoomies: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT
Miz Ficti: OH MY GOD CAELUS JUST DID A DOUBLE BACK FLIP INTO A SLIP AND TOTALLY JUST STYLED ON THOSE ANTIMATTER LEGION GOONS
Rzack: …he didn't?
Miz Ficti: It was real trust me
Yugo: We are watching the same thing, right?
As the last enemy falls off the ledge due to the lack of any railing in this section of the Space Station, Caelus breathes a sign of relief.
Looking at the download terminal, Herta's avatar floated over to the downloader to give him a new set of instructions, "So, if you tap here, you'll see a bunch of people you know on the left. They're from your memories, minus the ones who actually come into the Simulated Universe to get their brains scanned. So I'd only pick people who are friendly with you. For now, just bring me-"
One of the Herta dolls appears without even finishing the sentence.
Letting her hammer hit the floor, she just monotonically said, "Wow, okay."
Caelus immediately bows before her, "Hi, sweetie."
"Please stop doing that."
Entrophy: Yay! Real* Herta!
Sinatra: Couldn't even afford for the real Herta to come.
Pom Pom: A reminder to Caelus that the Astral Express is very patiently waiting for you! We're all set to go!
Caelus blinked, remembering the whole part where he was supposed to join the Astral Express.
Turning to Herta's camera, he sheepishly gave a thumbs up, "I will join the Astral Express when, uh, I finish testing the Simulated Universe!"
Herta's doll simply told the audience, "Yeah, sure, you can take him off my hands after this session."
Caelus accepted her word as law, and said, "Alright, so, we should continue, right? There's one more group of enemies left."
"Yep," Herta confirmed, "Just do that."
Caelus nods, leading the group into battle.
"Time to twirl!"
The group is blown up effective immediately.
Terastol: Hammers are awesome.
Foxian Wonder: Why does she say "Time to Twirl!" though?
Picking up another blessing, Herta directs him to a red portal. Which is apparently how they extend the sessions through zones.
Not questioning it, Caelus leaps right in, bringing everyone along with him to a separate section of the Space Station.
Actually, it was literally the floor below where they were.
After that, they get into another completely uninteresting fight that didn't even get chat interested.
Still, Caelus was enjoying the way they were growing stronger and decimating their enemies. He genuinely couldn't contain his excitement as his concentration crumbled away and he envisioned the image of Herta.
Herta, oh, beautiful Herta, who is currently snapping at him to wake up…
Wait, wake up?
"Caelus! It's another Aeon!" Her hurried voice shouted at him, "Get it together!"
Caelus immediately locks in, just in time for a great voice to erupt from behind him.
"Akivili, Akivili!" A voice laughed wildly, "It has been so long, I miss you greatly!"
His hair stands on end, affected by the infectious enthusiasm of a madman.
Turning around, he sees the Aeon. Without a head and a mask in their arms, they waved their hand at Caelus. The Aeon circles around him, their arms hanging in mid-air, their muscles controlling their trembling knuckles, and their posture like that of a sculpture.
This was Aha, The Elation.
Aha (MOD): THAT'S MY GOAT! MY GOAT!
Wolfy (MOD): Oh I thought you were someone else.
Meme Man: My Aeon, oh, my Aeon…
Cogs: Ugh, the Elation…
"I am so sad," Aha tearfully exclaimed, tears running down Caelus's body as though he was the one crying, "Why did you die?"
Die? Caelus was still alive. Though, Akivili…
Right, he is Akivili.
"Well, I'm here, aren't I?" Caelus tried, but it didn't seem to work as the Aeon of Elation spoke over him.
Clasping their hands together, Aha spoke, "You have fallen too long and the universe has lost its order," Then, clapping, "Then everything started to turn to chaos! This is what I want! I want to hug you, but unfortunately, I'm just an equation in a computer. Oh, that seems kinda cool."
Aha scratches his non-existent head, "I think I would squish you."
Cogs: Ah, he knows.
Miz Ficti: So the answer to "What if you found out you're in a simulation" is "Oh, that seems kinda cool."
Cthu: I think Aha is cool. Definitely the most talkative out of all the Aeons we met so far.
Herta, for the first time since the Aeons began to appear, spoke up in the middle of their presence, "Ugh, this punk figured it out again. I have to get Screwllum to edit Their data once more…"
"Hehe," The Elation giggled, "I have to apologize to you, really. I lay in ambush aboard your train for a whole year just to blow it up with your nameless followers. I couldn't resist, I'm sorry."
They put their hand to their chest and bowed solemnly.
Herta didn't like it, "This disgrace is still pretending. They've already figured out you're not Akivili. He's just ignoring me, though."
That made Caelus upset. How could anyone just ignore his beautiful wife like that?
Pointing to Herta's avatar, Caelus made his dissatisfaction clear, "Don't ignore Herta like that. She's my wife!"
"I am not," Herta immediately refutes.
Aha, the Elation, simply laughs. But the joy of the Elation reverberates throughout the entirety of the universe, forcing laughter out of Caelus and Herta as well.
A moment later, the two of them suddenly stop laughing as Herta elaborates, "I edited ourselves to be immune to his shenanigans, I doubt we'll get anything out of him at this point."
"Akivili, you're alive and well, but your wife doesn't love you yet!" Aha giggled as though They were a gossipy high schooler, "How interesting! Please play with me more, that's what I want… Grow up and defeat me!"
Raising their foot, They prepare to kick down, before Aha remembered something and off-handedly mentioned it, staring directly at Herta's avatar, "Oh, there's this Trash Can I've been tormenting recently… Beat them up if you see them, okay… Chat?"
Cogs: Oh, they saw us?
Aha (MOD): GREATEST AEON OF ALL TIME AGREE?
Cthu: THAT'S GOTTA COUNT AS US BEING GAZED BY AN AEON RIGHT?
Mirrond: This Aha guy is pretty cool actually
Caelus Agenda Pusher: GOATED BEHAVIOR BY 3 GOATS IN THE SAME ROOM
Silencio: Yessir I will KICK any trash can I see.
They kick the ground with a stomp and fade away.
That stomp destroys a continent on the planet they were floating over.
Returning back to the space station, Caelus gasps for air as the laughter exits his body through the pores of his skin.
"Aha, the Aeon of Elation," Herta looked annoyed as she explained the Aeon, "Every single time we simulate Them, They figure out They're inside a simulation. We've tried basically everything, but we can't stop Them from finding out eventually."
Caelus patted her on the back, "Don't worry, you'll figure out how to stop Them from doing that soon. After all, you have me to help now, right?"
"You can maybe do one thing very badly," Herta charitably gave him, "Also, stop touching this doll. I can't feel anything from it."
Caelus pouts, not happy about it.
"Okay, since I can't feel anything from it, you can do it," Herta suddenly amends, making him feel better.
Wolfy (MOD): UNPROMPTED?!
Qingque: SHE'S WARMING UP TO HIM!
Caelus Agenda Pusher: WE ARE SO BACK!
Herta doesn't explain why she allows it, but Caelus considers it a beautiful gift nonetheless.
"Now, get back to testing," Herta said, making him immediately rush down the closest enemy.
So they go back to fighting through the chambers.
As the Blaze Out of Space burns away, a silence fills the chamber as the entire crew patiently waits for something to happen.
However, no Aeon came.
"Ah, well, that's a shame," Herta easily shrugs it off, her doll's form going still as her voice starts speaking from the avatar, "We've met Qilpoth, Fuli, and Aha all in the span of 2 sessions, that's still amazing. I think, with your obligations to the Astral Express, that's it for today."
A white portal opens in front of Caelus, Herta explaining, "This is the exit portal, it'll take you out of the Simulated Universe. I've chatted with some of my fellow geniuses while you were fighting, and we've agreed to re-double our efforts now that we have a good tester in you. Next time you come back, you'll enjoy our official version of the Simulated Universe."
Smiling, Caelus nods in understanding, "Okay, Herta. I'll see you in reality. Love you!"
Herta does not respond as her avatar floats mid-air, her eyes now forming the words of "STREAMING MODE."
He considers this a victory.
Wolfy (MOD): SAY IT BACK!
Aha (MOD): SAY IT BACK!
Sinatra: Herta get back here and SAY IT BACK!
"It's okay, guys," Caelus reassured, walking towards the exit, "I knew what she wanted to say."
Cogs: "Shut up" ?
"No," Caelus replied to his chat, "She said it back to me in spirit."
Before he read any of the chat that told him he was wrong, Caelus departs the Simulated Universe.
…Except now, he's in an endless void.
Well, this was inconvenient. Chat isn't here with him either.
"Uhh, hello?" Caelus nervously called out, hoping Herta would answer.
Instead, what he got was a chill down his spine.
Caelus blinks, and in front of him was a massive Trash Can. Shiny and silver, with absolutely no discernable features other than being a stereotypical metal trash can, it was almost picture perfect.
Caelus has mixed feelings on this.
On one hand, imagine what treasures are buried within that trash can. After all, trash cans are simply another form of treasure chests. And who doesn't like treasure chests? They have treasure inside of them.
On the other hand, he's pretty certain he's hallucinating. After all, the Simulated Universe should be over. Herta wouldn't lie to him like that.
"Caelus…" A voice comes out of nowhere, shaking every molecule in his body through the power it exuded.
Now that he thinks about it, probably the Trash Can spoke to him.
He's not sure how a Trash Can can speak.
Not having any way to prevent it, the Trash Can got closer and closer to him…
Soon, he was laughing.
Or, rather, he was forced to laugh, to be happy, to not feel fear, to not feel anger.
Through his laughter, he spotted the cause of it.
Aha, the Elation, had shown up.
The madman of a thousand masks loudly cackles at the Trash Can, "Ahaha! Found you! Found you! You lose, you parasite!"
The Trash Can responds, but for some reason, Caelus doesn't hear the reply.
Though, he's pretty sure that the Trash Can is upset.
Then, out of nowhere, Aha the Elation pulls out Qilpoth's hammer, the very same one used to start an Amber Era.
Even he could tell that the mumbled jumbled words of the Trash Can were "What the fuck."
"Bye bye!" Aha laughs as They bring down Qilpoth's Hammer on the Trash Can's lid, creating a massive explosion, perhaps rivaling the Big Bang.
Well, he stopped being able to tell as his vision was consumed by pure energy.
At the same time, Caelus woke up, standing in front of the Simulated Universe machine, perfectly unharmed.
Blinking, he looks over to Herta, who acted as though nothing was wrong, "So, the next time you jump into the Simulated Universe, you'll be able to play the official version. We'll do some things to tweak it while you're gone, like what to do with Aha, but that's nothing you'll have to worry about."
While that was all well and good, Caelus had to ask one thing, "So, uh, speaking of Aha… Was that whole Aha smashing a Trash Can thing I saw after I left the Simulated Universe supposed to happen?"
Herta looks at him weirdly, "Wait, what did you see after the Simulated Universe closed?"
Caelus explains the whole scene to her in vivid detail. A lot more than you just read as Caelus is the better writer, probably.
Humming, Herta cups her chin and wonders out loud, "It could be nothing, but maybe Aha is a lot closer than we previously thought…"
Tilting his head, Caelus asked, "But what about the other thing?"
Herta looks at him weirdly, but then realizes, "Oh, that thing? It keeps appearing whenever we recreate the universe, so I just assume that there's a giant trash can creature floating in space someone made. Aha seems to enjoy fighting it, though. We figured it wasn't too much of a priority, since chances are that it's one of Aha's things anyway… There are a ton of random things in the universe like that."
Tilting her head slightly, Herta raises a finger to her chin, "Though, if you saw that after the Simulated Universe shut down… Hm, I'll put in a note to have someone find that thing in reality. Maybe Aha will be around it. Anyhow, I think you've kept Himeko waiting long enough, right? It's time for you to depart."
Caelus accepted the explanation. After all, it was Herta's explanation.
But one thing he had to ask was this, "Can you come with me?"
Herta inquisitively narrowed her eyes, "Come with you where?"
"To be a Trailblazer with me," He said, completely dead serious.
If he wasn't able to travel with Herta, then he might as well not travel at all. For a life without her is a life without meaning.
Sighing, Herta shook her head, "I'm not a trailblazer, why would I come with you? Besides, I have work to do here, you know?"
"Can you keep in contact with a doll at least?" Caelus asked, though he was basically already begging at this point.
With an unimpressed look on her face, Herta was about to reply.
But then, a lightbulb went over her head, "Oh, well, now that you say it…"
She snaps her fingers, and another Herta walks into the room.
"This is a long-range model of my puppets," Herta said, showing it off to him, "I made it on a whim a while ago and never felt the need to bring it out."
Caelus completely ignores how Herta didn't feel the need to use it during the invasion. Because, of course, Herta could easily deal with it once she arrived in the station. There was no communication needed.
"I doubt it'll keep up with the distance that the express travels, though," Herta said, letting herself go limp as the long-ranged doll looked to him, "You can have this one."
The happiest he's ever been, Caelus brightly smiles and tells her, "Thank you, Herta. I'll just will for this doll to be able to connect to you, and we can talk together as if it's fine."
"That's not how it works."
"Don't worry, honey."
"Just because you changed the pet name doesn't mean you can keep doing it."
Clearing her throat, mostly to just make the noise, Herta changes the subject, "Anyhow, you remember how we were live-streaming the Simulated Universe?"
Caelus nodded, patiently waiting for the expected outcome.
The expected outcome manifests itself as Herta reveals her avatar, the same one from the Simulated Universe, "I made this thing in reality too. You know that new fancy streaming gadget that Asta gave your friend? This is basically that, but made by a genius. It has access to the account you just used, and this can do basically anything else you ask it to do. I know, I'm great, aren't I? Thinking of things before you ask."
Knowing this was the best day of his life, Caelus brightly smiled and patted Herta's head, "I love you."
Herta sighs, not even fighting it.
AN:
It looks like Herta is up for 3.0… Meaning I'm going to get Herta soon.
I ended up using my guarantee pulling for Aventurine since I needed the second sustain. But luckily, I've already lost all the 50/50's I'll ever lose in this game.
Which is, in fact, THE SEVENTH TIME I'VE LOST THE 50/50 IN THIS GAME IN A ROW!
SEVEN!
IN A ROW!
I STARTED PLAYING THIS GAME LIKE 6 MONTHS AGO AND I STILL HAVEN'T WON A 50/50!
DO YOU SEE MY GODDAMN 50/50 RATES?!
[On Ao3, there's a pic of my pulls. I'm bottom 0.31%.]
I am heart broken.
Anyhow, luckily for me, with coin flip rates this bad and a chapter this long, I'm going to get The Herta without losing the 50/50. Maybe I'll even use all my funds to get her signature Light Cone and maybe pick up an Eidolon or two. Who knows?
Anyhow, if you're wondering what that whole scene with the Trash Can was, just consult my profile picture and the very first Author's Notes. It's basically just the change of plans.
I thought it'd be way funnier for Aha to start Aha-ing.
Speaking of a change of plans, do you remember what I said about short chapters? Yeah, this chapter took like 2 weeks and is 10k words long.
The reason why it took 2 weeks isn't because it was 10k words long, it was because I CANNOT write this fic for some ungodly reason. Like, my body was finding all sorts of excuses to not write this for the longest time.
Also, I had to consult a playthrough for a lot of the Aeon stuff, so that was pretty annoying. That might be half the reason.
Also, I know you already know this, but don't trust me on anything being said in here. I am a writer of Enigmata. I will just lie to make my fic sound cooler.
Anyway, I PROMISE that next chapter will be a shorter one. Probably coming out in January after I get The Herta.
The only question is: Do I go to Belobog first, or should we follow that Miss Darth route of doing a quick filler chapter, including that "Introducing the Trailblazer room" thing?
Well, I'll figure it out in a month from now. You can sway me in the comments or in my Discord server.
ZPrVHumQJv is the invite code.
And also, here's this little thing I threw up in MS Paint lol.
[Again, Archive of Our Own. Great place.]
Anyhow, the next time I see you, it will be as a proud The Herta owner.
Whether I will be $100 poorer is up to fate.