MINJI

A stream of light filtered through the window, illuminating the particles of dust that floated lazily in the air. Minji sighed, lost in thought as she watched them drift in the sunbeam. The sun was warm on her skin, she could sense spring was coming. The heat from the sunshine melted the snow, leaving puddles in its wake and revealing tender green stems in the ground. A steady stream of droplets trickled in front of the window, the only sound present save for the breathing tubes and beeping of the machinery in her sister's hospital room. Knees tucked, she pressed her chin down, her finger toying with the petals on a flower from Jahee's bouquet. They're dying.

The leaves of the daisies had begun to wilt, a sprinkling of yellow petals scattered along the windowsill. Minji had been diligently changing the water– her grandmother had told her it would help the flowers last longer. In truth, they had lasted almost two weeks, which was impressive but still not enough, she wasn't ready to let them go. She picked at a stray petal, brow furrowed and sighed. The flowers simply served as a reminder of their time apart, and each time another flower began to droop a sense of helplessness washed over her. Try as she might, she found it near impossible to put her feelings for him aside.

She wasn't sure when it had happened, how he had infiltrated the deepest corners of her heart in a way that separating from him was now akin to removing a limb. Maybe it all started with that damn jacket. She rued the day she put on that leather jacket, his intoxicating scent now so familiar to her she could almost smell it in her memories. Or was it when he carried her up the stairs? Maybe it was the way her body always felt warm around him, even when it was freezing cold. Had it always been that way? It was through these seemingly insignificant actions that he had pulled her in. These small gestures that built up over time, stacking neatly inside her heart to form a puzzle she couldn't yet decipher.

Minji glanced over at her sister, an overwhelming sense of guilt burrowing in her gut. How could she even waste energy on such childish concerns when her sister was hurt? It was pathetic. She hated herself for it, how easily she could forget about her when it came to Jaehee. He was like a turbulent ocean. Each time she told herself she would just dip a toe in, but before she knew it she was being swallowed by towering waves, her body fully consumed and thrashed about until she didn't know which way was up or when she would finally come back up for air.

"You must be sad" Minji jumped in her seat, startled by the sudden voice in the room.

Her grandmother sat down on the couch beside her, easing her old body down with practiced care. "You must be sad, the flowers are dying"

Minji looked between her grandmother and the wilting buds, rearranging her features to a look of indifference. She folded her arms, glancing over her shoulder as if the grey-blue walls of the hospital room were suddenly fascinating to behold. "Why would I be sad over some stupid flowers?" She scoffed, her tone reminiscent of her bratty teenage years.

Her grandmother raised an eyebrow, taking in Minji's show with the wisdom of a person who had lived decades more. "Ah, well. I guess I can just throw them away then…" She had barely reached the vase before Minji shot up off the couch like a bullet, her hand on her grandmother's. "W-wait!"

A smug smile crossed her wrinkled face. She looks pleased with herself. Minji slowly lowered herself on the couch, releasing her grip. "I mean… Iseul might wake up any day now. W-won't it be nice… if she has some flowers to look at?"

"I think she would love that, but don't you think we could use some new ones?"

Minji chewed her lip, her eyes darting back and forth between her grandmother and the vase.

"Tell you what, why don't you take these home to your bedroom, and I can get Iseul new flowers. Does that sound like a good plan?" Minji nodded, unable to come up with a clever response. Am I that transparent?

Her grandmother patted her hand, her eyes sparkling with warmth. "You know Minji, nobody would judge you if you were to admit that you like that boy."

"I don't like Jaehee. We just happen to be in the same department."

"Do all your classmates wait until three am in the hospital for you?" Her grandmother sighed "Minji, Iseul is not the little girl she was when your mother first left."

"I'm her big sister, I'm going to be here for the rest of her life." she retorted defiantly.

"Of course you will. But you aren't a kid anymore. Iseul is growing up, too. I know you two are very close, but it may be time for you to consider living your life for yourself. How long are you going to punish yourself for your mother's mistakes?"

Minji retreated her hand, curling her knees back protectively, her arms wrapping tight around herself. "Iseul, she's… my everything."

Her Grandmother smiled, brushing her hair back, the scent of vanilla and coconut wafting around her. "And when are you going to stop dyeing your beautiful hair?"

Minji grinned resignedly, she cupped her hand gently over her grandmother's, entwining their fingers. Her grandmother returned the grin, the crows feet by her eyes crinkling with joy.

"She's your everything, but you have a big heart. I know there's room in there for more people." A wrinkled finger poked at her chest, before she eyed Minji suspiciously "There better be room in there for me!"

They both laughed together, before her grandmother gathered her in her arms as if she were still a little girl, her hands softly brushing through her hair. "You know…" She started "If you hang the flowers upside down they'll dry and that way you can keep them forever."

"That would be nice"

"I think so too"