Revengeance

Lincoln slapped the fluffy ass of Keenie, the fallen angel, after pulling up his trousers, "Get up, sheep. You got another day of work ahead of you."

Keenie groaned, "Five more minutes."

Lincoln snapped his fingers and Keenie's collar shocked her, jolting her out of bed. "I wasn't asking, or do you get off on getting shocked?"

Keenie groaned again and got up, she started getting into a maid uniform as Lincoln put on his coat.

It had been a week since I.M.P. locked horns with C.H.E.R.U.B. which ultimately resulted in the team of angels getting locked out of Heaven for accidentally killing a human who happened to be one of I.M.P.s targets. Lincoln took the opportunity to get some harsh revenge in for being kept out of Heaven himself by shanghaiing them into his charge. Soon enough, he and Keenie left his room and walked into the lobby of I.M.P. where Loona was.

Loona scowled at Lincoln, "So, you pass on me but you fuck a sheep?" she asked.

Lincoln smirked at her, "I could have you anytime I want, but it's not everyday I can get an angel who was abandoned by Heaven. Besides, I'm Scottish, I can't help it."

Keenie didn't respond, she had since accepted her lot as Heaven had turned its back on her. She got to work cleaning around the office. "At least I'm better off than Cletus..."

Meanwhile, Cletus was walked into Moxxie and Millie's apartment wearing some sort of sailor outfit.

Moxxie had a wide grin, "What do ya think Millie? I got him the most embarrassing outfit I could find!"

Millie also had a wide grin, "Oh darling, he looks absolutely dreadful! I could just slash him to ribbons and jump rope with his intestines!"

"Someone please kill me." Cletus grumbled.

Millie took out one of her many knives, "Aw, you're in Hell, sweetie! Killing you won't do you any favors here! Now, be still so mama can practice her stabbing!"

Cletus dodged Millie's thrusts with her knife and kept thinking to himself, "At least I'm better off than Collin..."

Back when Lincoln first brought the three angels from C.H.E.R.U.B. to the I.M.P. office he had a very wide and very sinister grin and one of his eyes was twitching, "So...with all that nonsense out of the way along with the office being destroyed twice in a row by our clients...I still need to find out what to do with you. I could just do to you what I did with that doe bitch but...hmm...I think you three deserve something more...long term."

Collin stepped forward, pointing at Lincoln with his hoof, "This is absurd! I'm not doing anything a Sinner tells me to! Especially one as lost and damned as you!"

Lincoln grabbed Collin's arm and bent it so his hoof was now pointing at the sheep, obviously breaking it on the process with an audible CRUNCH, "Do you feel that? That's what Hell feels like. Do you want to know how I spent my first week here after that BITCH friend of yours kicked me down here? I spent it scared and alone. I spent it being kicked, shot, stabbed, punched, shot, sexually assaulted, nearly blown to pieces, shot, partially chewed, and I even had an arm torn off at one point. Hell seems to have a thing where you always feel pain, yet still come back for more. Whatever was left of my kind self died the day I was killed for no good reason. Where were you three when that happened? You didn't interrupt I.M.P. when they killed a good boy who had barely started his life, yet you tried to stop them from killing that old fucker who spent his entire life screwing over people and getting what he fucking deserved?"

Collin's body was shivering, a few droplets of suspicious liquid fell from his pants. He turned to see Cletus and Keenie who were holding each other, and also shivering. The sheep boy turned to the angry rabbit, still grinning but now blood seemed to be pooling on the sides from being stretched too much. "Wh-wh-what are y-you go-gonna-"

Lincoln picked Collin up with one hand and with the other, he tore a big hole in the wall. He stuck his head out of the hole he made and yelled, "Heya cocksuckers! Did ya miss me?"

A lot of angry yells, empty beer bottles, and bricks were thrown Lincoln's way.

Lincoln held out Collin to the angry mob, "See this fluffy motherfucker? HE'S THE REASON I'M DOWN HERE WITH YOU ALL!" with that, Lincoln tossed Collin to the crowd of imps all lined up with red in their eyes.

The angry mob didn't take long to start tearing Collin to pieces. Lincoln held Cletus and Keenie out to witness the horrors Hell had to offer.

Lincoln himself smiled as he watched Collin suffer, "You know, it's too bad he wasn't a goat, because this would make for a good scapegoat pun."

Somewhere, somehow, Luan started giggling but didn't know why.

Back in the present, Loona tssked as she watched the sheep clean the office, "You know, I bet Octavia wouldn't be happy to hear what you're doing with cotton-candy-tits."

"Well, that's not up for you to decide now, is it?"

Loona turned to see Octavia step through a portal holding a box. "Wait, you already know he's using an angel as a jizz rag?"

Octavia nodded, "It's not like we're married, or official. Besides, it's refreshing to see him embrace his more cruel self." Octavia rustled her feathers a bit, "On top of that, bagging an angel is no small feat."

Keenie suddenly appeared next to Loona and spoke with little emotion, "Wow, I almost feel sorry for your thirsty ass. Then again, you're a lowly Hellhound bitch so I can't pity you."

Loona responded by tackling the sheep and started to maul her.

"Ah, Octavia! You brought it!" Lincoln cheered as he approached, ignoring the mauling going on in the office.

Octavia smiled as she handed over the package, "Of course, figured it'd be easier, and I wanted to see how it looked."

Blitzo slammed the door to his office open, "Could you keep the catfighting down? I'm trying to do some actual work!"

Loona had Keenie in her jaws and shaking her ferociously, blood splattering around the lobby. Keenie barely reacted, her eyes were already void of any light.

"Loonie, stop mauling the help!" Blitzo then approached the two teenagers, "Also, ooh! What's in the box?"

"I'll open it in a second, keep your pants on Blitzo." Lincoln told him as he opened the box.

Blitzo poked his head inside, "Too late! What did you- WHAT THE FUCK?"

Inside the box was the disembodied head of Deerie, now stuffed thanks to the taxidermist Octavia frequented. The head's mouth open as if gasping for air with her eyes rolled back.

Lincoln took the head out of the box and let the box fall to the floor, "Do ya like it? I figured it'd spruce up the office a little, and be a conversation starter!"

"Jesus Christ Lincoln! This is disturbing! Even for me!" Blitzo shouted.

Lincoln gave Blitzo a puzzling look, "Really? We do this stuff all the time to deer back home!"

"God, no wonder the human race is damned."

"I like it." said Octavia as she lightly brushed the top of the head, "You tore her head off in a rush of demonic flourish."

Lincoln shrugged, "Honesty, I just wanted to strangle her, but I guess I was too rough on Earth."

Blitzo groaned, "I get that. Still, did you have to stuff her head? And now mount it in the office?"

Another shrug from Lincoln, "Well, what else could I do? Turn her head into a fleshlight?"

Keenie finally spoke up, "With all the ass kissing and dick sucking she did, you'd get herpes."

There was a pause in the I.M.P. office, and then Lincoln, Octavia, Blitzo, and Loona burst into laughter. Keenie fell out of Loona's mouth and onto the floor. The sheep murmured as she realized she'd have to clean up the blood she was leaking onto the floor.