Chapter 16I Died in Their Arms Tonight
"Wake up, Miss Granger. Wake up," said the unmistakable voice of Professor McGonagall as it pierced through the fog clouding my befuddled mind.
As my eyes started to crack open, a bright light burned into them. "Wha—what's happening? Wh—where—uh—where am I?" I garbled out as I slowly started to regain my senses. I could see the outlines of several people standing over me. Something was definitely wrong.
"You are in the infirmary," replied Dumbledore's unmistakably soothing voice.
"The—the infirmary? I was in—" I started to say, only to be cut off.
"You were in the second floor girl's lavatory," he said. "We were summoned there by—well—by the subject I'm afraid we need to talk about."
"Talk about, sir?"
"Yes. You have broken several school rules, Miss Granger."
"I have? Am I in trouble? Am I going to get detention?"
"Rest assured," said Professor Snape. "If you were in Slytherin house, and your fate—"
"She's not in Slytherin, Severus," interrupted Dumbledore. "It will be up to Professor McGonagall to prescribe her punishment.
I gave Professor McGonagall a look filled with fear. She gave me a withering stare over her glasses that left no uncertainty to her feelings. "I am very disappointed by your serious lack of judgment and disregard for the school rules," she said. "You must be aware after the events of your fourth year, that the making of Polyjuice is forbidden. We have destroyed the rest of your supply. Gryffindor will lose twenty-five points because of poor lack of judgment.
Using the potion will cost Gryffindor an additional twenty-five points," said Dumbledore as Snape gave me a condescending smirk. "However, your worst action was trying to use it to change into a member of the other gender. That practice has been forbidden with good cause at Hogwarts for almost one hundred years. I should note the Ministry frowns on it, too. Your attempt to transform is what triggered a Taboo charm placed on it. That is why you passed out. That is why you are here."
"I—I—" I started to respond.
"Your reasons are not important, Miss Granger," he continued. "Fifty more points will be taken from Gryffindor to reflect the seriousness of your action. However, Professor Snape said your Polyjuice was exceptionally high quality. Twenty-five points will be returned to Gryffindor for successfully making an exceedingly difficult potion." This caused Professor Snape to frown disapprovingly.
"Now, Miss Granger," said Professor McGonagall. "It is time to discuss your detention."
"Yes, Professor," I said, fearing the worst.
"I trust you are familiar with the loos at the Quidditch pitch."
"Yes. They are disgusting. I never use them."
"Well, they have not been cleaned since the end of Quidditch last year. That job normally falls to Mr. Filch. However, he is going to be relieved to find out you will be cleaning them for him."
"But—but—there must be twenty of them," I gasped.
"Eighteen, to be exact," responded Professor McGonagall.
"I—"
"I suggest you get started," she interrupted me as she finished my sentence. "You have two weeks before the first match. Mr. Filch will supply you with everything you need. Let me have your wand. I don't want you tempted to use any cleaning spells."
I handed her my wand and turned to go. I heard Professor Snape say, "That's an inspired detention, Minerva. I apologize for expecting you to be lenient," as I left the room.
"Thank you for your assessment, Severus," she replied.
An hour later, I was headed out of the castle and down the hill on my way to the pitch with Mr. Filch.
"My. you are in trouble. I can only imagine what you must have done to get this kind of detention," said Mr. Filch in a sour yet strangely cheerful voice. "I haven't seen a detention like this one since—well—since long before you came here—since before Professor Dumbledore became the headmaster."
Once we arrived at the loos, Mr. Filch showed me how to remove the catch basin from the back of the unit and load them onto the wagon without spilling the contents. I had to haul it into the forest and dump and scrap it into a pit. The smell was hideous. I could taste the air. It was worse than drinking Polyjuice. It was like being stuck inside a box full of exploding dungbombs. I wondered if it was going to be possible to wash it out of my clothes and scrub it off my skin.
By dinnertime, I had cleaned one loo. I made it upstairs and went straight into the showers. I ripped off my clothes and started frantically scrubbing myself. After a long time of soaping and washing, I grabbed my stuff and hurried back to my room. I got dressed and barely made it to dinner.
I was famished. I loaded my plate with twice my normal meal. Even Ron gave me a startled look at my portion.
"Where have you been?" asked Ginny.
"I was serving detention," I replied like I was spitting out sour milk.
"Detention? You? What did you do?" she inquired.
"I—uh—I am not supposed to talk about it."
"What's that smell?" asked Ron, stopping Ginny's questioning. "Did you get hit with a dungbomb?"
"Yeah. Something like that."
"Who did it? I'll—" said Ron as I interrupted him.
"It's okay, Ron. It's over," I said, thrilled at the way Ron jumped to my defense so quickly. I would have hugged him, but considering the situation, I restrained myself.
Over the next few days, the word of my detention found its way through the entire school. It was not uncommon to see groups of students up on the hill, staring down at me. I can only imagine the laughter and comments. Rumours about me abounded. None were close to reality.
I found out how to remove my stink after four days. Myrtle, bless her ghostly heart, had mercy on me as I was preparing to cut off most of my hair. She told me to use the water from the blue faucets. It worked miracles, but I still had to endure the job. However, people would sit near me in the dining hall again.
12 September—Dear Diary, (I never talk about my diary. It is private. However, much of what you have already read here seems to have come from it.) Anyway, I wrote Dear Diary, Almost cut my hair. It happened after the fourth detention day. It was getting kind of stinky. I could have said it was in my way. But I did not, and I wanted to cry. I loved my hair and did not want to say goodbye.
I feel like I owe it all to my poor judgment. It was because I had poo for detention and I was not feeling up to par.
Remembering increased my paranoia, like looking at my mirror and seeing a basilisk. But I am not giving in an inch to fear because I promised myself Ron this year. I feel like I owe it to us. When we finally get ourselves together, we are going to get down in that sunny Highlands weather.
And I will find a place inside to laugh—separate the wheat from the chaff. I feel like I owe it to myself, yeah. I cannot believe I almost cut my hair.
On 13 September, the day before Quidditch tryouts, Hannah Abbott's mother was found dead. They called her out of Herbology class to tell her the news. Poor Hannah. She was a DA member and the Hufflepuff prefect in my year, and she was a really nice person. She left the school with no plan to return. I felt really terrible for her.
With Harry's return to Quidditch and promotion to captain, the Gryffindor tryouts on 14 September were quite a scene. Far more people than needed to fill the roster, some of them not even Gryffindors, showed up. Cormac McLaggen decided to challenge Ron for the keeper position. If I were to list the most loathsome boy in the school, Draco would be first. Cormac and Zacharias Smith would be competitors for second.
Cormac was a spoiled rich boy who spent most of his time bragging about himself and his family. He was more obnoxious than Draco. However, he lacked an agenda that could move him to the top of my list.
Physically, he was a bit taller and larger than Ron. He looked more like a beater than a keeper. However, keeper was a prestigious position like seeker. Cormac knew he did not stand a chance of winning against Harry. He still wanted a prime position and decided to go after Ron.
Harry was instantly selected as the seeker. No one challenged him. After some very spirited jousting and throwing, Ginny and Demelza Robins won the open positions of starting chasers alongside longtime chaser Katie Bell. Jimmy Peakes and Ritchie Coote won the battle to become the new starting beaters, replacing Fred and George. This left six people wanting to vie for the keeper position.
Ron and Cormac quickly dismissed the other four. It was down to them in a shootout. Cormac was actually pretty good. He was quick and confident. Ron was not as smooth, but still competent.
Katie and Demelza started taking penalty shots at them. Ginny was told to sit because she was Ron's sister. Cormac and Ron each blocked four shots, but Cormac was looking the better. I could not stand the idea of him winning the position from Ron. I summoned up all of the rule-breaking Hermione I had in me. As Demelza and Katie rounded the pitch, I quietly cast a confundus charm at Cormac. I was certain no one saw me. Cormac went the wrong way. Katie's quaffle whizzed by him and through the center hoop. Ron made the save on Demelza's shot. It was over. Ron was still the keeper.
Later, we were at Hagrid's. Harry said he saw me use the confundus charm on Cormac. He got pretty upset but let it go because he felt the same way about Cormac as I did.
During this time, I was still spending almost all of my spare time doing my detention of cleaning the loos. I had vomited more times in the past two weeks than I had in my entire life. Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw were set to play the opening match of the season on Saturday. I had three loos left to clean.
I finished the last one on Friday just before dinner. I scurried back to the school and scrubbed myself clean in the blue water. I dressed and made it down to dinner. I was worn out. But my detention was finally finished.
I no more than filled my plate when a message sailed up and landed in my mountain of pappardelle bolognese. I knew what it was. I gave Pansy an exhausted look and shook my head no. I had nothing left. A get-together would have been an exercise in futility.
I caught up to Pansy as she was leaving the hall. "I'm sorry," I said. "We need to do a rain check. I am too exhausted from my detention." She understood but was definitely disappointed. It was the first time I had ever turned down an invitation.
Ginny, Luna, and I went to the Quidditch game the following day. Luna thanked us for coming to cheer on Ravenclaw. We told her we were glad to do it. Besides, both of us despised Zacharias. She said she wished she had known we were coming earlier. She would have made us hats to match her screaming, flapping eagle. She said the three of us together would have looked spectacularly amazing. I think she was right.
Ravenclaw won 250 to 90. The highlight of the match for Ginny and me was when Zacharias got knocked off his broom and landed in a heap in front of the stand with his parents. I think he wanted to cry but knew he did not dare. We both took secret pleasure in seeing the expression on the face of his haughty father. In some ways, he was even more disgusting than Lucius Malfoy.
With the detention over, I had time to go to The Three Broomsticks with Harry and Ron. Just outside of the inn, we saw Mundungus Fletcher selling things that Harry was certain came from Number 12 Grimmauld. Before we could confront him, he disapparated. Once we were inside, Slughorn cornered Harry to invite him to dinner. However, Harry said Snape would not let him out of detention.
Once we were full of butterbeer and dragon scales, we headed back up to the castle. Katie Bell and her friend, Leanne, were a ways up in front of us. Suddenly, there was a scream. Katie lifted off the ground and hovered for several seconds. Both of them were screaming as Katie plummeted to the ground. When we got to them, Katie appeared to be having a seizure. Leanne was saying, "I told her not to touch it! I told her not to touch it!"
We got Katie to the infirmary with the help of Hagrid. Professor McGonagall told us the necklace was cursed and that Katie was lucky to be alive. Harry said Draco was responsible. Ron and I, and especially Professor Snape, disagreed with him because he had no evidence to support his claim.
In early October, Harry had his second lesson with Dumbledore. He was not allowed to discuss much of it. However, he told us about using a pensieve to view memories. He said he saw young Tom Riddle and a few other things. He also said he needed to befriend Slughorn to get a memory from him that Dumbledore was desperate to view in the pensieve.
One Saturday, as Gryffindor's first Quidditch game was nearing, I walked down to The Three Broomsticks while Harry, Ron, and Ginny were practicing with the Quidditch team for match. It was against Slytherin. That meant facing Draco and a lot of drama.
The inn appeared busy as I walked in past the sarcastic snipes of the shrunken heads. Even they were unwilling to let go of my reputation as the loo-cleaning queen. Even though the place was crowded, I quickly spotted Samantha and Daphne. As I started their way, I suddenly noticed Daphne had a slack-jawed expression and was acting a little odd. I immediately knew what they were doing. "AHA!" I thought.
I quietly slipped around behind Samantha and approached them unnoticed. "Well, well, well," I chirped as Samantha's head snapped around and Daphne looked up. "What a fortuitous turn of events this is. My, how the winds have changed in my favor."
Samantha quickly turned off the vibrating knickers and reached to stuff the controller in her bag. "No. No. No," I insisted as I whipped out my wand and said, "Expelliarmus." The controller popped out of Samantha's hand and into the air. I snatched it and stared at them with an evil grin.
There was fear in their eyes, especially Daphne's, as I holstered my wand and prepared for some fun. They were at my mercy, or lack thereof.
Several Hufflepuffs, including Zacharias Smith, were seated at a table across the way. Zacharias was, as was his wont, boasting away in flamboyant fashion.
"How would you like to go cozy up to Zacharias while I play with this?" I said, looking at Daphne.
"Please. No," she begged, looking ready to cry. "Anything but that. Please. He's disgusting."
"As disgusting as Pansy was for me?" I replied as I turned the vibrator back on. "Maybe both of you should go over there."
"We're friends, Hermie," pleaded Sam.
"Friend who made me almost rape Pansy on this very table," I sneered as I spiked up the power, causing Daphne to jerk and squeal.
'I know that was wrong," said Sam. "We shouldn't have. But we've been good since then."
"Ye-yes," said Daphne, trying to stay focused as I wiggled the control knob. "Please."
Fifteen minutes passed with me taking Daphne to the edge several times before reeling her back in. She was begging for relief, and I was just about to have mercy on her when the door to the inn opened. In walked Crabbe and Goyle, looking as obnoxious and stupid as ever. They sat down at a corner table that was occupied by a couple of younger students before they were scared off.
"Your boyfriends are here," I said with an evil chuckle. "You should go over and say hello."
"No. They're gross. Please don't make me," begged Daphne.
"If you give Crabbe a kiss on the head, I might just have mercy on you."
"Pro—promise?"
"I promise. I will even send Sam with you to help."
"Wha—wha—what?" gasped Samantha, her mouth falling open. "You wouldn't."
"I would," I replied with a scowl. "Now, get going before I think of something worse for you to do."
Daphne looked at Sam. There was desperation in her eyes, fueled by the need for relief. They got up and moved across the room like they were prisoners ascending the stairs to the gallows.
"What do you want, Greengrass?" growled Goyle as they reached the table.
"Yeah. You know Draco said Pansy doesn't want you hanging around us."
Daphne started convulsing as I spiked the control up and down. "B—b—-but we li–ke you, Crabbie," Daphne choked out as they stepped behind the pair.
"Bollocks! Clear off, both of yuh."
Daphne gave me a panicky look as I wiggled the control dial. She was clearly teetering on the edge. I bobbed my head in an obvious request for her to kiss his fat head.
There was a moment of hesitation, then she bowed forward as I turned the intensity up to eleven. You could see her explode as she planted the kiss. I am pretty certain I heard her squeal 'Craaaaabbie'. Samantha grabbed her and started to pull her away as Crabbe looked like a bear that had been poked with a particularly sharp stick.
"Bloody hell!" he bellowed as he wallered to his feet. "Get away from me yuh bleedin' plonker."
Samantha dragged Daphne back to our table. "What kind of mercy was that?" whined Daphne.
"The same kind you gave me," I responded. "Now, take off those knickers and give them to Sammy. It's her turn for some fun."
They both looked at me in disbelief. "Here? You're not serious," said Samantha in a nervous voice.
"I mean now," I replied. "I insist. Or you will be dancing on a table in the dining hall with them on later. Now, get changed.
The change was easier for Daphne than for Samantha. She was wearing a dress. She peeled them off without too much difficulty. Samantha was wearing jeans. She had to strip naked from the waist down without being caught to get them on.
"Wha—what are you going to do to me?" asked Samantha in a tentative, fearful voice as she finished putting them on. "Are you going to make me kiss Goyle?"
"Oh, hell no," I replied as I started to laugh. "Even I am not that mean."
Samantha had a look of relief on her face that suddenly disappeared as the knickers sprung to life.
"Come on. Let's walk," I said.
"Where are we going?" asked Samantha.
"You will see," I said as I led her and Daphne out the door.
Before long, our destination was obvious. We were on our way to the quidditch pitch. Gryffindor had it booked all afternoon for practice. By the time we arrived, Samantha was a shaking, twitchy mess. She barely made it up the stairs into the stands.
I played with the controller as we watched the action. Daphne stood close to Samantha for fear she might topple over the rail. Then, just as Samantha was on the edge of exploding, I said, "Flash Ron. Make him miss the shot."
"Wha—wha—what! Are you crazy?" she gasped.
"Show him your bristols. If he misses the block, I'll put the knickers on and give you the controller."
Samantha was on the edge, and the temptation was too great. As Demelza Robins charged at Ron, Samantha yelled as she jerked up her jumper and bra. Ron started to topple off his broom, I turned up the control, and Samantha screamed as she orgasmed. He shouted, and Demelza lost control of the quaffle and crashed into him. This resulted in her breaking her nose.
Harry used the Episkey spell Luna had taught him to fix it. Afterwards, we got yelled at by Harry, Ron, Ginny, and several others for a good fifteen minutes. We were lucky Ginny did not bat bogey the lot of us. As we left with our tails between our legs, we made a pact to never do anything remotely similar to that again.
As Halloween approached, the concerns over Voldemort were growing. The tension in the school was becoming palpable. During lunch on Halloween day, Pansy sent me one of her little invitations. We could use Halloween as cover for a bit of frivolity in the shower.
After dinner, I took off to our little meeting with a promise to the others that I would catch up to them later. The water in the prefects' bath felt wonderful as I slid up next to Pansy. Maybe, just maybe, this was a chance to clear my mind of all of the worries cluttering it—to escape, if only for an hour or so, into a different, beautiful world of joy and pleasure. With all of the tensions of recent days, this seemed like just what I needed.
Pansy leaned over as our hips met. I was expecting to feel a hand on my breasts and a kiss on my cheek. Instead, she said, "Can I ask you something? You don't have to answer unless you want to."
"Sure. What is it?" I replied
"I—uh—I am pretty certain of how we view our relationship and our individual sexual preferences. So—uh—why don't I ever see you dating? Is it by choice? Do you choose not to date? I think there are plenty of boys who would like to go out with you."
"Oh," I replied, taken aback as the soothing water that had started to relax my body suddenly felt chilly. "I am always so busy—classwork and stuff. Actually, I have been asked several times, but mostly by guys who I am not interested in. Besides, there really is only one guy I would like to date—but he has never asked me."
"Yes, Harry Potter. I can understand that. He is in high demand. Even a couple of my housemates have said things. You should be dating someone of his stature."
"No. It's not him. I like Harry a lot. I—I—I—uh—love him, but not in that way. He is more like a brother to me. I think he feels the same way about me. I am not sure either of us could ever get past those feelings."
"Ohhhh," breathed Pansy. "Then, who is it? Who do you want to date?"
"I—I—uh—well—uh—you have to promise to keep it secret."
"Not a word. I promise," replied Pansy as she pulled me closer.
"Ron—Ron Weasley," I squeezed out. "I have liked him forever."
"Oh—okay," responded Pansy. I could tell she was surprised and also trying to be polite. Ron and his entire family were not held in high regard by Slytherins, especially by Draco and his family. "But isn't he swapping spit with that nasty, little Lavender Brown?"
I could not respond. The look on my face said everything Pansy needed to know. Tears welled up in my eyes.
"I'm sorry," said Pansy as she put an arm around me. "I didn't realize—"
"It's—it's o—okay. But what about you?" I asked, shifting the conversation as I wiped my eyes. "Are there other boys you would like to date other than Draco? I get the feeling that he is not a particularly good boyfriend."
"That—uh—" said Pansy as she looked downward. "That is not an option for me. The Malfoys have decided that I am the only pureblood girl in the school worthy of their son. I think it is because of my mom and dad. My parents are also fixed on the idea of us being together. It would be like the uniting of kingdoms in the old days. I don't seem to have much say in the matter."
"What about Draco? How does he feel about the situation?"
"He is in a constant struggle to live up to his father's vision for him. He doesn't like it, but he will do whatever he is told to satisfy him. However, I have seen his eyes wandering on occasion. I have seen the way he looks at Astoria Greengrass. It bothers me."
Our conversation put a damper on our mood. It took us a while to get heated up. However, she took me over the top twice before I rolled her over and returned the favor. Instead of the shallow exhilaration of frantic sex, we left the pool with a deeper, more fulfilling feeling that comes with good sex. I found Harry, Ron, and Ginny at a party in the Fountain Courtyard. Ron had smuggled in a load of party supplies from Weasley's Wizarding Wheezes. The place was filled with fun.
Just over a week later, on 9 November, it was time for the Quidditch match against Slytherin. Ron was a nervous wreck. His practices had not gone as well as desired. He knew the expectations when playing against Draco. As we ate, my roommate, Lavender Brown, walked up and wished Ron good luck in the match. I had seen her looking at Ron lately. I wanted to say something, but Ron popped.
"Cormac can have the position after today," he said. "This is too much."
As all of us tried to calm him down, Luna walked up. "Hello, everyone," she said in a very Luna fashion. "You look dreadful, Ron. Is that why you put something in his drink, Harry? Is it a tonic?"
My eyes shot down at Harry's hands. He had the Liquid Luck vial in his hand. It was clear that he had spiked Ron's drink.
"Don't drink it, Ron," I shouted as Ron picked up his cup and took a drink. You're both going to get detention or worse if anyone finds out.
"Let's go," declared Ron, sounding strong and confident. "We have a match to win."
I sat there as Ron, Harry, and Ginny disappeared. I did not know what to say, think, or do. This was way beyond the confundus charm I had used on Cormac.
The Quidditch pitch was alive and loud when I arrived with Luna, Neville, and Seamus. We were packed in like sardines for the watching. Gryffindor was on fire right from the start. Ginny, Delmelza, and Katie were scoring almost at will. At the other end of the pitch, Ron was brilliant. Nothing got past him. When Harry finally caught the snitch in front of an outraged Draco, Gryffindor ended up winning 250-0.
The singing, shouting, and general revelry were crazy all of the way back to our dorms. Once we were inside, it was deafening.
I said to Harry, "You should not have done it."
"Done what?" he said as he pulled the unopened vial from his pocket.
"You—you—Ron only thought you put it in his drink." I gushed, feeling relieved and a bit embarrassed at my earlier behavior.
And that is when it happened. That is when I died.
Lavender Brown suddenly attacked Ron like a pink Devil's Snare. She wrapped him up and started kissing him with such ardor that it looked like she was trying to eat his face. And Ron—Damn you, Ron. He started kissing her back. I felt like they had pulled my still beating heart from my breast and showed it to me before throwing it in my face. Tears burst from my eyes. My stomach turned. I fled the room before I vomited.
I did not know where I wanted to go. I just knew I had to get out of there. I finally ended up at the bottom of a stairwell making birds for Charms class to distract my mind. However, try as I did, all I could see was myself dead in her arms.
It took time, but I got my tears under control. Still, I could not bring myself to return to the dorms. I planned to sleep on the steps. Maybe the celebration would end by morning and I could go to my room.
Eventually, I heard steps. I turned and saw Harry. He sat down beside me without speaking. Finally, I said something about the birds, charms spells, and class.
"They're really good," said Harry.
A moment later, I heard more steps. Ron and Lavender appeared. She was still stuck on him like a spider web.
"This room is taken," said Lavender as she looked at Harry and me before kissing Ron on the cheek.
Lavender started trying to pull Ron away. He must have felt some kind of conflict. "What's with the birds?" he asked.
I stood up and said "Oppugno" with a wave of my wand. The birds launched themselves at him like missiles as he turned and ran. They splattered in little, yellow clouds of feathers on the wall.
Harry pulled me back down onto the stair. He put an arm around me. I leaned my head on his shoulder. Fresh tears were flowing from my eyes.
"How does it feel, Harry?" I asked. "I have seen how you look at Ginny when you see her with Dean."
"It feels like this," he replied.