Bob the Bards Presents Another Song for Your Listening Pleasure
The Company With No Name
Welcome friends... [performer sip your beer and nod to the bartender]
(Musical intro begins)
O come you children and elders old.
Gather round and join the fold.
Hear of companions true and bold.
They are the Company With No Name.
First there is Xena the lost princess true.
Warrior sees the whole fight through.
Annoy her and your ear she'll chew.
She's in the company with no name.
Got the barbarian Ghengis, deadly with a bow
A rain of arrows, the foes laid low.
If only he wasn't always last to go.
He's in the company with no name.
Now Loro the thief, he will never steal.
Send him first, now that's the deal
Monsters think he's one fine meal
He's in the company with no name.
The gentle ranger Ransarn he's much too kind.
Monsters hurt him, he doesn't mind.
But for giants he has an axe to grind.
He's in the company with no name.
The cleric Tulo dislikes those evil gods.
Enemies struck with his almighty rod.
Heal the sick, protect the down trod.
He's in the company with no name.
The mage Ani is quite a fearsome sight.
Blasting the foes to left and right.
They think his mind is not quite right.
He's in the company with no name.
Meeting in a small town one day.
This band needs a name they say,
And so they argue the days away.
They're the company with no name.
The Princesses Party one does say.
The other chorus ain't no way.
They're the company with no name.
Mighty Hero's is suggested next day.
Even their horses do give nay.
They're the company with no name.
The barbarian suggests the Lion Hearts.
He's made to walk behind the carts.
They're the company with no name.
The Glorious Company the thief does say.
Don't steal that, their legendary heros nowadays.
They're the company with no name.
The cleric says the Heavens wrath.
They suggest he needs a bath.
They're the company with no name.
The wizard suggests the pink giraffe.
They chuckle, roll about and laugh.
They're the company with no name.
Now my names Bob their first minion and guard.
Fighting gargoyle and demons was way too hard
Then I found out Ladies really love a bard. [performer give a saucy wink to a fair maiden]
So I sing about the company with no name.
Travelling throughout the lands.
Always giving a helping hand.
They're the company with no name.
So when monsters come prowling near.
Striking people's hearts that fill of fear.
Give the call and they'll come here.
They're real friendly and paid with beer.
Call for the Company with no name.
Their soon to visit evils lair near you.
With the mighty battle cry HEY YOU! (Point outwards & shout HEY YOU)
Charging reasonable rates you'll understand
For used gear from some evil war band. (hold up a sign saying repairs may be needed)
They're the company with no name.
They're, The, Company, With, Nooo, Naaaame. [drawn out]