He never saw me once. He never did. He always saw her. Not me. You idiot...I hate you. I hate you so much. All the times we spend time together. He was really...spending it with her, wasn't he?
I refused to speak with him after that. I even when as far to cut our connect as master and servant so he wouldn't know where I was on the ship. I know it was causing stress on me. But in truth I didn't care. I don't really want to be his master anymore. I don't want this command seal on my hand anymore. I don't want any of this. Everything hurts. You stupid idiot. I hate you.
Sion had been let out of the brig with the other Nemo series. I had been hiding in her back room for two days now. She knew something big had happened. When she asked, I wouldn't answer. She knew it wasn't something small. I'm sure he was panicking knowing I cut our connect off. But I don't care. Why should I care about anything ever again? That's the point? I was lightly sobbing. I had left the ring outside my room that morning too. I don't want anything from him. I want nothing to do with him ever again. I been lied to sense the start, haven't I?
Ever sense I summoned him. He saw me as a replacement for her. my thoughts had been trapped in thinking things like that for a bit now. But I had finally calm down a bit. Sion stared at me with a worried look, "Do you want to talk about it?" I shook my head no. It wouldn't matter if I did it wouldn't fix anything. I hate him...so much.
"I take it that idiot told you, didn't he? about his past I mean." She must have known from how I was reacting. "Yes..." I took it very poorly when he was being honest with me. how could I not think of it this way? How could I not have these thoughts? "You need to stop stressing out your body. You will get sick at this rate." she plainly told me. "...I don't want to let the connect to relink." I was forcefully using mana to cut it. "Again, if you keep this up you will get sick." she was warning me. In truth I didn't care if I did get sick. I'm sure she knew that. "Sara." she sounded serious. "Let me show you something. I wouldn't normally do this. but I feel I need too." I could only look lost at her. She pulled out her laptop and when into a folder. "...?" I could only look lost at her. "I want you to look through every video file in there." she plainly told me. "Why?"
"These are all video files of little captain's thoughts of you." I look surprised to hear that. "...of me?" there was over 50 of them. "Even if he does stupid shit a lot. He is always thinking of you. In one way or another. He is always worried over you." He was showing his obsess again of me with this. "Try the newest one first~"
"I'm an idiot. she will never forgive me no matter what this time." Are theses his thought? "Of course...I hurt her. I hurt her so badly. Of course...that's all I ever do lately. She even when as far to cut our connection. Sara...I'm sorry I'm a huge idiot. Why did I tell her that in the most horrible way? Of course...she would have those thoughts after how I did that. Of course she would think that way...how could she not?" These thoughts were his regrets of how things had gone? "...there no way she will not avoid me forever now. Why am I so bad at this? I just wanted to be honest with her. I wanted her to understand my past. But...all I did was hurt her." I paused the video and stared toward Sion. "Are all these videos?"
"They are thoughts of you. In one way or another."
Nemo...
"As I told you before. I watch his status. But this wasn't me doing this. He has been recording these on his own without knowing it." He made all these himself. "His head is full of thoughts of only you. Nothing else is in there." She was clearly joking about that part. But after seeing so many. How could it not feel that way? "I'm sure he did something really stupid and that's why you are upset. But as you can see, he meant well." Nemo...you are an idiot. A super stupid idiot. "I think you should finish at least that one." I felt myself un-pause it as his voice started up again, "...was this doomed from the start? I been in love with you sense you summoned me." what? "It was hard...so hard to hold back for so long. It was so painful. I was scared. you would reject me. but I guess that doesn't matter anymore, does it? she will never forgive me." This is.
Nemo...
No matter what I love you and only you. He had told me. No... I was wrong. The one who is the idiot is me. For him to have this many video thoughts of me. It was clear I had just scared myself so badly. If not, these told me his actions have. He had been supporting me sense the start. Why didn't I believe him? I... I am horrible to him. I felt myself sob again. "There There~ You are both idiots without a doubt~"
How could I face him? after I refuse to believe him. Nemo I'm sorry...I don't deserve you.