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Chapter 21: I want you to stay

Ms. Jones, the respiratory therapist, walked towards Jane with an iPad in her hand.

"Mr. Jane, I am Ms. Jones, the respiratory therapist for this floor. To help you communicate your needs, here are some pictures and word prompts (on the iPad). Could you show me on the pain scale if you're in any pain right now?"

Jane pointed to No. 3 on the pain scale.

"That's very good. Could you show me where you feel the discomfort?"

Jane pointed towards his neck, where the trach tube had been inserted.

The therapist gave a sympathetic smile to Jane and lightly squeezed him arm to show her support. "Yes, it's the breathing tube there."

Jane pointed towards the picture, which read - Tube out when?

"Hopefully soon." The therapist smiled.

"Do you think you can stay awake for some more time?"

Jane gave the therapist a thumbs-up sign.

"Alright then. Agent Lisbon, you can stay with him for 15 more minutes. You can use the communication chart on the tablet, or you may use the whiteboard. If he indicates he's tired or is in distress, use the call button next to his bed."

"I will Ms. Jones, thank you so much."

Lisbon walked towards Jane with a big smile on her face. Jane smiled back and held out his hand to her. She held his slightly cold hand with her warm hand and then smoothed his hair. Satisfied by how he looked, she took a seat on the chair and gave him the iPad.

Jane pointed towards the sign that said, Are you ok?

"Yes, I'm okay, Jane. Are you feeling better today?"

Jane gave her a smile and a thumbs up. He then motioned to her that he wanted to write something.

Lisbon gave him the whiteboard and the marker. She had no idea what he was going to write or draw, so she waited.

Jane's grip on the marker was a bit weak (as expected), but he continued anyway. He drew a tic-tac-toe board and drew an 'x' in the centre of the board and then handed it over to Lisbon.

Lisbon broke into a giggle when she saw that!

"You want to play?"

Jane grinned back at her and pointed towards the board, indicating that it was her move.

Lisbon drew an 'o' next to the 'x' on the left.

Jane drew an 'x' above his 'x.'.

Lisbon drew an 'o' below the 'x' in the centre line.

Jane drew an 'x' next to the second 'x' on the top right corner and mischievously grinned at Lisbon as he was going to win this round.

Lisbon paused for a moment … "Ah, you got me!" and proceeded to mark her 'o' in the top left corner.

Jane marked his final 'x' in the lower left corner and then proudly drew a diagonal line through the boxes to indicate his victory.

Lisbon was thrilled that Jane was in the right frame of mind and spirit in spite of all the trauma he had been through.

"Good game Jane!"

In spite of his grin, Lisbon could sense that Jane was already getting tired. So, when he asked to play one more game, she sweetly reminded him that her 15 minutes were nearly up and that she would come back later.

Jane held her hand tightly, not wanting her to leave, but Lisbon had no choice really – her time was up, so she pressed the call button and waited for someone to come by.

"Sweetheart, I'm sorry I can't stay here any longer – doctor's orders, but I promise I'll come by soon… Ok?"

Jane's eyes were already welling up with tears. Lisbon felt terrible leaving him in that state, but nobody from the medical team had come by yet, so she stood up and caressed his face and once again smoothed his hair and then gave him a little kiss on his forehead.

"I'm right outside your room, okay? Don't be scared; I'm here for you, and you're safe here."

A nurse walked in at that very moment, and Lisbon felt relieved as she didn't know for how much longer she could stay in the room. Lisbon informed the nurse that her visiting time was up and that she felt like Jane was showing some signs of tiredness.

"Don't worry, Agent Lisbon, we will take good care of him. Ms. Jones has advised a short-acting sedative, which will help him relax for a couple of hours."

"Can I stay with him for a few more minutes till the sedative takes effect?"

"That would be alright." The nurse smiled sweetly at Lisbon.

Lisbon felt an immediate sense of relief. She walked towards Jane with a big smile while the nurse informed Jane that she'd be administering a sedative to help him relax. Jane smiled when he saw Lisbon returning.

"See, I told you, I'm right here. You still want to play Jane?" Lisbon asked in jest.

Jane's face perked up, and he gave a thumbs-up sign to Lisbon, and so began one more game… Two games later, Jane couldn't keep up due to the sedation working its way through his body, and thus, he finally succumbed to it.

Lisbon adjusted his blanket a bit and then quietly left the room, hoping that Jane would get his much-needed rest.

Thursday evening

Lisbon popped back into Jane's room to see how he was doing. He was still asleep. He looked so peaceful that it made her think of all those times she had seen him napping on his couch. Almost always peaceful, but surrounded by the noises in the bullpen. Here, it was probably the noisy machines that were aiding his sedative-induced sleep (she thought to herself). With nothing else to do, Lisbon returned to her room. Cho had left an hour ago, so she found herself alone once more.

Now that Pete and Luke both were dead, the only threat that remained was Red John. In the video that was sent to the CBI, there was a warning that something bad could happen to Jane if hedidn't wake up in 5 days, but thankfully he did, so Lisbon didn't worry about the threat anymore. All that mattered now was his final stage of recovery in the hospital. Just one more tube to go, and Jane would be free - free to talk! Lisbon reminisced about the times Jane had driven her crazy with his theories and silliness; how much she missed that banter! Even though Jane seemed to be doing well given the circumstances, Lisbon worried about him and the fragile state he was in.

(Meanwhile in Jane's room)

Jane found himself awake but feeling groggy and a bit dizzy. There was no one in the room. A few minutes had passed, but the dizziness had increased, and this caused him to become a bit agitated. He could feel his heart rate speed up, and a slight sense of panic started building up. He desperately wanted to call out to someone, but his body reminded him of the tube down his windpipe. Thankfully, the alarm on the cardiac monitor went off, and a nurse rushed in to check what had triggered the alarm.

100 – Heart rate 85/75 – BP 97 – O2 Saturation 27 – Respiration

She noted the readings and walked towards Jane with an iPad in her hand. She showed him the picture chart, which had images and words describing how the patient was feeling.

"Mr. Jane, could you show me what's going on?"

Jane took a few seconds to find the picture on the chart, which had the word 'dizzy' written under it. He weakly tapped the image on the iPad.

"I see. Is your head or neck hurting too?"

"No," Jane mouthed the word to the nurse.

"Okay, that's good."

The nurse checked his temperature – it came back normal. She then slightly changed the position of his bed to see if it helped him – it did, but not significantly. His BP was still low. It was now five minutes since the onset of the dizziness, and the strain of feeling dizzy was affecting him emotionally. A few tears slipped through his eyes and down his face. It didn't go unnoticed by the nurse, so she tried comforting him and telling him to take a few deep breaths. In the meantime, she called one of the senior nurses for advice. She advised a saline drip and asked the junior nurse to call her in case the drip didn't improve the patient's condition.

As the senior nurse was leaving, Lisbon walked into the room and was surprised to see the two nurses there.

"What's going on?" she asked the nurses.

"Agent Lisbon, Mr. Jane has been having some trouble. We are monitoring it; nothing to worry about."

Lisbon wasn't convinced, so she walked towards Jane, whose eyes were still closed, but it didn't look like he was asleep. She looked at the monitor and realised something was going on with Jane.

101 – Heart rate 84/73 – BP 96 – O2 Saturation 27 – Respiration

She immediately went and held Jane's hand. He opened his eyes groggily, looked at Lisbon, and made a small attempt to smile, but he wasn't able to keep them open.

Lisbon noticed that and stroked his forehead and spoke to him softly.

"What's wrong, Jane? Are you in pain?

"Dizzy," he mouthed.

Lisbon looked at the nurse and asked what was happening. The nurse advised her to speak to the senior nurse, who'd be back shortly.

While she was waiting for the senior nurse to return, Lisbon stayed by Jane's bedside and let him know that she was there for him.

15 minutes later, the senior nurse and a doctor walked in. They greeted Lisbon and proceeded to check in on Jane.

"Mr. Jane, I'm Dr. Kelly. How are you feeling now?" The doctor held an iPad in front of Jane and asked him to point out how he was feeling.

"Still dizzy?"

Jane must have pointed towards the 'yes' sign on the picture chart… Lisbon thought to herself.

"Alright Mr. Jane, I'm going to check for a few things, okay?"

She shone a light in his eyes to see if his pupils contracted appropriately. They did. She also checked his lungs – both sounded alright. He wasn't running a fever, and his BP was stabilizing. All considered, Jane was okay.

"Agent Lisbon, everything seems to be okay, and his BP is coming back up. The only reason that I can think of is the residual effects of the sedative that was administered to him. That, in addition to mild dehydration, is the most likely cause of his dizziness. We have already begun administering saline, so that should help with the dehydration. He will feel better in due course."

"I see. But why did he react so strongly to the sedative? Was it a new type of sedative?"

"I will have to check those details, Agent Lisbon, but rest assured he is going to be okay. We won't administer another sedative tonight, and we will be monitoring him closely for any further symptoms."

On hearing those reassuring words, Lisbon relaxed a little. The doctor had allowed her to be in Jane's room for some time, so she took a seat on the chair next to Jane's bed and played some soft instrumental music for him. Fifteen minutes later Jane was still sleepy, but his parameters had returned to normal. That was a huge relief for Lisbon. She decided to let him rest for the night and returned to her room for the night…