"So, what's this I hear from Nem that you want to talk to me about something? She was cryptic about it and she wouldn't elaborate on it no matter what I said or how I tried to get it out of her so it's up to you to tell me whatever it is that you want to tell me!" Hizashi's hands twisted together when he looked up to Oboro who shuffled over with a hand pulling out a chair before plopping down with a coffee in hand. Then the blue-haired man smiled softly at him with his head tilting slightly. "Talk to me, Zashi. What's going on?

Pinching his lips together slightly, he looked down at his own coffee which sat ignored on the table before him with weak weakly wafting off of the surface of it as his fingers twisted together. Thumbs pickling at one another when he then let out a trembling breath, he hadn't been aware he'd been holding when his gaze raised up to meet that clear, brilliant blue gaze of Oboro's. "I know that Nem has probably already told you this so it won't exactly be new news or anything but I've been, um, fucking Shouta."

"Okay." The blue-haired man then nodded before lifting his mug up to blow on his coffee gently before raising it up. Sipping at the scalding liquid no doubt when he untwisted his hands to reach for his mug which he lifted up to take a sip of his own when Oboro hummed softly as he lowered his mug. Thumbs rubbing blow the rim of the mug when those eyes lifted to his. "She told me the other day about you fucking Shouta five times in a row last weekend, was it? And I'm guessing on Saturday that you two fucked again?"

His face burned with a wave of heat as he looked away from Oboro. It was mortifying having to admit it out loud when he could hear his sons shrieking delightedly outside with Nemuri. He felt awkward admitting this in his dining room when his children were just outside those walls but he found himself squeezing the mug in his hands. "Yeah, but I just couldn't help myself, Oboro, you know? I don't know what I was thinking but just- One minute, I'm confessing and then he asks to kiss me and then I'm just-"

"Pants just blown right off and in the midst of it?" There was a soft smile playing on Oboro's lips that had him wanting to hide his hot face away when he nodded at the blue-haired man silently which had a sigh leaving the man before him. A slight shift when Oboro then traced his fingers along the rim of his mug. "I'm not saying it's smart, Zash. Not by a long shot. I understand not being able to help things but you know that this shouldn't be a regular thing, you know? I mean, did Shouta even give you an answer for your confession?"

"Not exactly? I mean, he said that he wouldn't keep me waiting long and that he'd let me know soon." He sighed out with his thumbs rubbing against the porcelain of his mug when he dragged his teeth over his lip when Oboro welcomed Sterling onto his lap where the cat happily arched up when that big hand of his slid over his back down to his tail. "I know it's wrong of me to fuck the man without getting a proper confession but it's so hard not too, you know? I mean, you probably wouldn't know what with you being heavily asexual but-"

"Just because I'm ace doesn't mean I don't understand desire or lust, Zashi! Believe it or not, my wife and I have one night a month where I give her all the satisfaction she could want and more! Just because I don't feel it the same way you or her would feel it doesn't mean I can't understand that you feel it!" Oboro paused then before with his mug lifting upwards with those blue eyes narrowing on him slightly. "But I definitely don't think you should be adding anything more to this situation when you don't even know how the man feels."

"I'm hoping he'll just give me an answer before we meet again, you know? I'm really, really hoping that I'm going to hear from him and he's going to tell me that it's returned to me and we'll go out or something. That's the hope but he's been busy the past, like, four days so we haven't talked as much." He paused to lift his own mug up to sip at his warm coffee while Oboro hummed as he sipped at his own. Swallowing, he lowered his mug down with a sigh. "I just don't want to push him, you know? He promised and I'm holding him to it."

Oboro's Adam's Apple bobbed as he swallowed his mouthful only to follow it with another. And another. The shriek of his sons outside just barely made it past the walls of his home with Nemuri's voice raising up slightly when Oboro frowned at him slightly. "A promise can be broken. Don't you know that, Zashi? I'm not say Shouta is a bad man! Not by a long shot! But you know sometimes promises get broken unintentionally, right? I don't think Shouta would spurn or hurt you that way but you never know, Zashi. And sex just complicates it."

"I know! I know I shouldn't but the last time just happened! We were both feeling it and he was touching me and I just-!" He paused to take a trembling breath when he watched blue brows squeezing together slightly as that frown pinched at Oboro's lips slightly with thumbs lightly moving to tap at the mug. "I'm helpless. I know, it's a cop out but I am. I find myself crumbling when it comes to him and I can't stop myself when I know what I want. And what I want is him."

The blue-haired man hummed softly at that when he watched as another, longer sip of coffee before Oboro then lowered his mug down with a sigh. The light thud of it against the table was deafening when the blue-haired man then looked at him levelly. Calmly. It was a look he'd seen in the past; one that often came with a brutal comment. One that was packed with honesty so strong it hurt. He tensed instinctively when Oboro's lips parted and- "You have awful self-control, Zashi. I hate to say it but you do."

He winced slightly with his hands tightening on the mug but was he wrong? Was Oboro wrong in being so brutally honest? No. Not in the slightest bit. And he knew that Oboro was being blunt with him but he deserved some bluntness, didn't he? He tore his gaze from Oboro who was staring right into him as heat burned in his cheeks when he looked down. "I want to say I'm sorry but I'm not. I'm just not. I may be reading into things but it feels like he wants me too and is that so bad? For me to want Shouta? For Shouta to want me?"

"It's not a bad thing if you didn't have feelings for him! God, Zashi, you are so down bad for this man and it's so painfully obvious to everyone! You confessed to him but he didn't answer you back right away which says something, doesn't it? I mean, did you fuck again after you confessed? Did you try to get an answer out of him? Because I love you, Zashi, I do but this is going to bite you in the ass! It's going to be painful and you're going to regret it if you don't do something about getting a response out of Shouta, you hear me?"

He fought the urge to wince, to flinch, but he knew that Oboro was right. He needed an answer from Shouta; he needed to know if Shouta wanted him for his body or if he was going to eventually, inevitably, return his feelings to him now that he had properly confessed to the black-haired man. He'd told Shouta he didn't want this to be just hookups and he meant it. He wasn't going to stand for that when he knew he wanted more. "I- You're right, Oboro. I know I need to push him harder for an answer but I don't want to piss him off, you know?"

"Maybe he can stand to be a bit miffed over something! You deserve an answer, Zashi, and I know there's no rushing it but if he feels something he'll know immediately, you know? I mean, when I confessed to Nem, she returned my feelings the same day! The fact that he fucked your brains out after you confessed means- Well, I don't know what that means, Zashi." There was an apologetic note to the blue-haired man's voice that had him frowning at his friend when he rubbed the tips of his fingers along the mouth of his cup.

"I don't know what it means either! I mean, I can say that I absolutely love how he fucks my brains out! I love it so much, Oboro, you have no clue! No one's touched me like that in forever and I just can't help myself, you know? Knowing that this strong, handsome, sexy man wants me of all people? It's mind-blowing! And knowing he wants me too? Well, that's just fucking icing on the cake I didn't know I wanted that bad, you know? I just- I want him. I need him. And I think it's cliché to say it but I think I'm falling for him, Oboro."

A frown pinched at Oboro's lips with fingers trailing along the rim of his mug before the blue-haired man let out a sigh. He lifted his own mug up to gulp at his cooling coffee while steam wafted around Oboro's face as he sipped at his coffee before putting it down again. He swallowed his mouthful then placed the mug down again. "If you're falling for him, Zashi, then you know what you have now isn't good. It's not good for you especially if you have feelings for Shouta. What if it goes from good, crazy sex to heartbreak?"

He hadn't thought of that. Not completely. He didn't know what he'd do if Shouta decided he couldn't be with him. It hadn't been something he truly stopped to consider in the slightest bit after he'd confessed to the black-haired man. He, of course, had his fantasies of Shouta returning them. Of the life they could have. But he'd never considered that this whole situation of crazy good sex could turn into something like heartbreak. "I hadn't thought of that. About the heartbreak. I mean, is that wrong of me? To enjoy something like this?"

"It's not a crime to enjoy sex, Zashi, it's really not! You can enjoy sex but like the saying goes, Shouta can't have his cake and eat it too! Neither can you! You need to figure out, going forward, just what you want from this man and you need to insist to him how you feel and make him understand this isn't just sex to you! This isn't just getting blowout fuck sessions and that you feel something real for him." Oboro's fingers tapped against the table then as if to punctuate his words like a gavel.

It had his heart stuttering against his chest when his hands twisted together again as he leaned back in his seat. Letting them rest in his lap when the blue-haired man before him nodded as if he were satisfied with his words. And they sank into him; they sank deep. It had him squeezing his hands together with his lips pinching into a frown when he then peeked up at Oboro. "I know you're right. You're always right when it comes to this shit, even if you are a clueless asexual sometimes."

"That's only sometimes! But I know how to read people and I know my friends which just so happens to be you! I know that this type of thing isn't going to make you happy in the long run, Zashi, you know? When you have real, true feelings for a man there's not stopping those hurt feelings from coming up eventually if you're feelings aren't returned. You just need to figure it out, Zashi; does this man want you for your body and the pleasure it gives? Or does he want you fully and completely?"

"You could be a therapist, you know that? Why does everyone in my life give such wise, sage advice yet it feels like I can't give the same?" A snort left the blue-haired man who had been in the process of lifting his mug up with a slight smile curling on his lips now with eyes shimmering at him. He sighed out when he tugged his hands apart to reach for his mug again. "But I hear you loud and clear, Oboro, and I know that you're being nothing more than a good friend. I appreciate you for listening to me and for helping me with this."

"Anytime! Honestly, I was thinking, if you wanted, I could talk to Shouta? One-on-one and see where he's at then report back to you about it?" He couldn't deny the offer was tempting. It was horribly, completely tempting leaving him squirming slightly in his spot with his hands grabbing his mug when he lifted it upwards. Draining half his cup in two long pulls before Oboro shifted in his own seat slightly with that smile softening slightly. "Obviously, if the idea makes you uncomfortable then I don't have to. I just thought I'd offer it."

"It's not that it makes me uncomfortable but what if he catches on? What if he thinks I asked you to do it? I don't want to be called out like that, you know?" He sighed out when he rubbed his fingers over the rim of the cup with the blue-haired man nodding at him but he found himself tapping his nails lightly against the ceramic. "I'm so tempted to have you talk to him, Oboro. I mean, who knows what'll happen? It's not like he wouldn't expect me to not talk about it with you guys, right? We're best friends, like brothers, and I dare say-"

"I love you enough to do this for you! I'll do what I can to invite Shouta over to mine and I'll talk to him, Zashi, and I'll find out what I can, okay? He's not the most open book out there but I'm sure I can crack him!" He smiled when Oboro's foot then nudged at his playfully to which he kicked it away which earned him a light laugh from the blue-haired man. There was a muffled shriek outside the walls out of view which had him smiling. "I'd be more than happy to find out what I can for you, Zashi!"

"I'd appreciate it more than you know, Oboro! I know it's only been four days and I don't want to push him but if you could figure out what makes him tick, if you could figure out how he feels for me, and pass it on? I'd be more than grateful to you!" The smile he got was beautifully blinding; a cheerful thing he'd recognize anywhere. He twisted his cup slightly along the top of the table when he peered at the blue-haired man. "Can I ask you something? It's kinda shallow and it's kind of a high school-esque question to ask but I want too."

"Zashi, I think after our years of friendship, the fact you see me as a brother, means that you can practically ask me anything! Even if it's a high school-esque question!" Oboro then lifted his cup up, blowing at his coffee before gulping at the liquid with his Adam's apple bobbing with a swallow and he twisted his cup again. The bottom grinding against the wood surface when he dragged his teeth over his lip; his canine digging into the corner of his mouth when Oboro lowered his cup with a smile. "Just ask it, yeah?"

"Okay! Okay, um, I hate to ask it to begin with but I suppose I should've thought about it harder." He licked his lips then when he fussed with his cup causing the liquid inside to slosh against the sides of the cup. His cheeks were warming again with a new blush and he could only imagined the mottled mess his face had to be again. "You asked me it back before you confessed to Nem. But do- I mean, could you see me and Shouta being like that? Being together in a-a relationship?"

Dark blue lashes fluttered in a blink before those blue eyes were widening at him in awe. As if it were a surprising question that he'd ask and not at all a rather childish one. The blue-haired man's face was one of surprise as his mouth fell open slightly with lashes fluttering in another blink while his face burned. It was mortifying. And then Oboro was giving another of those light laughs with his hand stretching out to touch the back of his lightly. "Of course I can! Zashi, it's all Nem has been talking about too since you told her of your crush!"

"What?" He couldn't control his voice as he shrieked the word with the blue-haired man laughing again as his face burned. Nemuri had been talking about it? How long had they been talking about it? Had it really been this whole time? Since he first spoke about his crush? It had his face uncomfortably hot at the thought as he fought the urge to fidget when the blue-haired man grinned. A pout formed on his lip when he looked away. "You two gossip like an old married couple, I swear!"

"Well, we've technically been married for five years so you could call us an old married couple! But the fact of the matter is, we can absolutely see you with Shouta in that way, Zash! I think you both would be a good fit for one another!" The blue-haired man then glanced towards the door when there were shrieks in the backyard. That grin on his lips widening when he turned back to him with fingers tracing the rim of his cup. "So, do you want me to talk to Shouta about it? See what I can find out for you?"

It was tempting. Painfully, completely tempting for him to say yes. To see what his friend can dredge up or to see if there was a chance that Shouta was going to confess to him. There was a temptation to it all that had his heart skipping sickeningly against his chest leaving him shifting slightly in his chair when he looked to Oboro again. "Fine. Fine! Please, talk to Shouta and see what you can find out for me, please? Tell me if there's even an inkling that he might confess to me or accept my confession?"

"I'll do my absolute best to crack that nut for you, Zashi! I promise, I won't mention you asking or agreeing to this! It'll stay between us!" And then Oboro was extending his pinky out to him which had him blinking before smiling softly. Of course, Oboro would pinky promise something; it was just like him. Stretching his hand out, he extended his pinky then wrapped it around Oboro's. his pale finger glowing against the bronze of Oboro's skin. He just hoped Oboro could find something out. That's all he needed.

An inkling.

A guess.

He'd take anything.


"Dad, is Auntie Nem and Uncle Oboro going to come over again?"

Hizashi looked over at Hitoshi who was sliding his arms into the sleeves of his pajama shirt. Purple eyes glistening at him curiously when he helped tug Izuku's shirt down over his belly then smiled at his son as he stood up with Izuku's hands sliding from his upper arms. "They'll come over again Friday! They stayed for dinner tonight which was very nice of them to do so! Did you two have fun playing with your Auntie Nem in the snow today? I would've played with you guys but I had to take care of dinner."

"It was suuuuuper fun!" Izuku chirped as he bounced on his toes with a shine to those big green eyes of his as spots of color popped on his cheeks. Smiling down at Izuku, he ran his hand over those wild green curls of his adoringly when the six-year-old bounced up on his toes with a smile on his lips. "I think Auntie Nem also had fun! She was rollin' in the snow too! And then To threw snow at her and she hit him in the head with her own snowball! It was lots of fun playing with Auntie Nem!"

"That's good! I'm sure that you're Auntie Nem had a lot of fun today!" He gently poked his son's button nose which had it scrunching up adorably before he reached down to slid his hands underneath Izuku's arms. Loving the giggle, it got him when he spun Izuku into the air, rushing forward on his feet to plant him onto the bed. It bounced lightly with the weight when Izuku giggled as he smoothed his curls off of his forehead to place a kiss on it then pulling back to smile. "I'm glad that you had fun today, Izu."

"It was lots of fun! But I missed playing with you too, Dad! Will you play in the snow with us again soon? Auntie Nem said that it was going to melt soon and I wanna play with you in it again!" He smiled when he leaned down to kiss the tip of Izuku's nose, his thumb caressing that freckled cheek softly before he tugged the blankets over his son. Tucking him in then handing him his stuffed animal that was hugged to his chest. Wide green eyes peering up at him hopefully.

"All three of us can absolutely play in the snow together! How about Saturday, after work, I'll play with you two when we get home, yeah?" A sparkle shone in those eyes when Izuku nodded excitedly when he pushed up with a smile down at the boy. He then turned to face Hitoshi who was dancing on his toes with his hands stretched up with fingers curling eagerly. Sliding his hands under his arms, he heaved the indigo haired child into the air with a squeal leaving the boy when he planted him onto the bed.

"I beat Izuku and Auntie Nem's butts in the snowball war though! I'm gettin' really good at it, Dad!" Hitoshi pridefully chirped as he smoothed wild indigo locks from his forehead which he kissed softly then leaned down to kiss the tip of his nose causing it to scrunch up adorably. His thumb softly caressing that pink cheek when he then pulled back to tug the blanket over Hitoshi who smiled up at him when he tucked in the sides gently. "You promise that we're going to play on Saturday? It was fun with Auntie Nem but it's funner with you!"

"I promise, we will take time on Saturday to play together in the snow, okay? I cross my heart that we will!" He handed Hitoshi his plushie which was squeezed to his chest when he straightened up and walked across the room. Picking up clothing discarded on the floor then flicked the night light on for the boys. He walked to the doorway where he grabbed the handle, clothing bunched to his side, as he flicked the overhead light off with a soft smile. "I love you, Toshi, and I love you, Izu! Goodnight! I'll see you in the morning!"

"Goodnight, Dad! See you in the morning! Love you too!" It warmed his heart at the chirping words spoken by his sons as he stepped towards the hallway with his hand pulling on the door knob. Shutting the door with a soft thud behind him, he sighed out softly before padding across the hallway towards the bathroom where he threw their clothing into the hamper there then flicking the lights off.

He walked back out into the hallway, his socked feet thudding over the floor, and he reached up to tug on the chain to turn the light off plunging the hallway into darkness. He padded down the hallway to the top of the stairs, reaching out to both railings then rushing down the stairs on his toes as he pressed his hands into the railings. He flew down the stairs quickly then leapt off of the last stair.

He made sure the front door was locked with a soft hum with his gaze going towards the living room which still had the TV on despite the lights being off. Walking across the hall to the living room, he walked into the darkened room then scooped the remote off of the coffee table. Pointing it at the TV, he flicked it off plunging the room into proper darkness as he placed the remote on the coffee table.

Walking out of the living room with his feet thudding over the floor, he entered the hallway once more with a soft hum to himself. He walked down the hallway into the softly lit kitchen where he walked through it with brisk steps to the back door to make sure it was locked as well. A yawn bubbled up his throat before he could stop it as it burst out of him. He was exhausted. He knew he shouldn't be so exhausted, so run down, but he was.

He was ready for the day to come to its close and he was ready to crawl into bed just like he had the previous nights. The days may be short in some ways but they felt longer in others. Making his way out of the dining room, he walked through the kitchen with the soft thud of his feet on the floor ringing out. Checking the sink for dishes that may or may not have been forgotten, the quiet washing of the dishwasher running, he nodded.

No dishes. He sighed out as he padded across the kitchen to the fridge which he tugged open. Looking for what, he had not a clue. He'd already put up left-overs from dinner into the fridge, lunches were already made for tomorrow, and yet he stared into the fridge. His fingers drumming on the edge of the fridge door when he then found his eyes landing on the packs of pudding he'd bought earlier this week.

He reached out to snag a pudding, a bottle of Coke, and he then shut the fridge door with a sucking thud. Tucking the Coke under his arm, he then walked to the counters to tug open the drawer where he plucked out a spoon. Shutting it with a light thud, he spun on his feet then walked across the room with those brisk strides. Flicking the light off, he then turned to walk past the freezer to the small hallway of his.

He walked down it with those brisk strides, his feet thudding over the carpeted floor, with his arm squeezing the frigid Coke bottle to his side. The soft golden light of his bedroom lamps spilled into the hallway like a beacon leading him forward. He nudged the doors open carefully to make enough room for himself to squeeze through. Shutting the doors behind him, he sighed out softly as he walked forward towards his bed.

Sliding the Coke from under his arm to place on the bedside table. His pudding and spoon being put down next to it when he grabbed the hem of his sweater to flip it up. Tugging it up over his head, mindful of his glasses and hearing aids, he had it flying across the room in mere seconds as his hair fell in a heap against his back. He then walked along the side of the bed where he slid his fingers over the top of the blanket lightly in a caress when he came to the foot of his bed.

Coming to the foot of his bed, he paused at the corner with his fingers tracing along his waist lightly with fingers flicking at the waistband of his pants. Did he want to get into pajamas? He didn't particularly feel like it but he hadn't slept in his boxers in so long. He scratched lightly at his waist before he was curling his fingers into the waistband of his pants. Pushing his pants down from his hips while keeping his boxers up when he bent down to shove them to his knees.

Down to his ankles where he stepped out of them then stood up with the pants in hand and throwing them towards his hamper. He got them in, thankfully, and he shivered at the cool air brushing his skin when he then turned on his feet with a pep to his step as he walked along the side of the bed. He got back to the head of the bed, tugging the blankets from their place beneath his pillow then flipping it back as he climbed up.

He slid over the fitted sheet then tugged the blankets over his lap and humming softly as he adjusted the pillows to sit between his back and the headboard. He then reached for his pudding and the spoon with a soft hum to himself, placing them in his lap, then grabbing the TV remote. He turned the TV on then placed the remote down to tear open the top of the pudding pack with another hum as he licked the top of it then tossed it in his trash.

Picking his spoon up, he swirled it through the pudding before scooping up a spoonful and popping it into his mouth with his gaze on the TV before him. It was some reality TV show he'd been watching earlier before he'd turned his TV off. He wiggled his feet beneath the blankets as he scooped up another spoonful of pudding when Cappella jumped up onto the bed. Padding over to him, the bell on her delicate blue collar jingling cheerfully with those beautiful eyes on him.

She padded over the bed towards him where she flopped down in a heap across his lap with a chirruping meow. He smiled, placing his spoon in the pudding container and running a hand over the cat who kicked to life her purrs that rattled her body. Her chest. He happily ran his hand over her side again and again with his fingers delicately twirling her tail around his fingers when he then went back to eating his pudding.

He always did love his pudding; it was one of his favorite little desserts to have after dinner. He popped the spoon into his mouth while the cat across his lap purred cheerfully, delightedly, as he scraped the sides of his container with the spoon. Popping the pudding into his mouth, the ball of his piercing clicked off of his tongue piercing lightly when he swallowed. Scraping the container and the bottom of it, he popped the last bite into his mouth then threw the container in the trash.

Sucking on the spoon lightly to clean it off, he placed the spoon on his bedside table. Grabbing his Coke, he twisted the cap off with a hissing crack then lifted it up. The soda felt fizzier after the softness of the pudding; it tasted sharp, fizzing down his throat sharply where it's cool temperature spread through his chest causing him to shiver. Gulping at the Coke, he then lowered it with a sigh as he capped it again then placed the bottle on his bedside table.

He looked to the TV but his mind didn't seem to care enough to focus on the show before him. It was too busy churning, twisting, and thinking about his afternoon. While the boys had been outside with Nemuri, he'd had his talk with Oboro inside. The blue-haired man had never been one to mince words and the man always said what he was thinking. He was a blunt man who tried not to sugar coat when he could and this afternoon, he'd needed that.

He'd needed someone to get on his ass about Shouta. God, what did he begin to do about the situation? Oboro was right; it was wrong to mix sex into this. That he shouldn't be doing that and that, in the long run, it would hurt him more if Shouta only wanted him for his body. If he only wanted him for sex. He didn't know how Shouta felt; that was the main thing that he needed to face. Shouta clearly wanted him physically but did he want him emotionally?

Did he want to be with him as badly as he wants to be with the black-haired man? Did Shouta see himself dating him? Was it possible that the black-haired man wanted him in that way? Was it possible that the man would return his feelings? Or would time show that they only have a physical attraction to one another? Would Shouta feel the same as him? Or would he reject him after this slight silent between them? He knew the black-haired man was busy preparing for tests for his class.

It was a warning Shouta had given him on Sunday that he'd been somewhat busy this week. And he understood it perfectly; after all, how could he not? He'd certainly had his hands tied up with his work at the shop and he'd been more than happy to keep himself busy while Shouta worked. While the black-haired man went over his emotions. He wanted to give the black-haired man time to think on how he felt.

He didn't want a sudden, knee jerking response. He didn't want Shouta to say it without being genuine about it. However, he couldn't deny there was a hit to his ego. One that stung with the longer it took Shouta to get back to him about how he felt. He couldn't explain how it stung only that it did. He didn't want to be bitter or salty in the slightest bit to Shouta; if anything, he wanted nothing more than to have that confession be returned to him with genuinely.

He wanted Shouta to take the time to exam his feelings, how he felt, and then tell him all about it. He'd rather there be some time to think about it rather than accepting in the moment when he didn't truly feel that way. He'd been happy to keep himself tied up with preparing lunches, helping his sons with homework, working at the store, and spending time with his sons. He didn't want to pester Shouta too often given the week that he was preparing for and he was more than happy to do just that.

After all, he wanted to give him time to think but how much was too much time? How long was too long? When did he demand an answer from Shouta? When did he demand that he be told what he wants the most to hear? And just how did he ask Shouta to tell him what he wants so badly to know without sounding like a brat? Oboro had promised that tomorrow he'd talk to Shouta whether it was over text, phone or in person.

The couple had already promised to watch the boys given the long shift he'd be taking at the store and then his radio show later tonight. He sighed out quietly to himself with his back pressing against the headboard. The pillows bunching and pressing against him slightly when he slid his hands over Cappella who purred happy in his lap. Vibrating furiously with her purrs. He wished he could remember the etiquette that came with confessing.

He wished he remembered what the proper time period for this was. He wanted nothing more than to have all the confidence in the world that Shouta was going to give him an answer. After all, the black-haired man had promised he'd give him an answer eventually but how long? He wanted to question the black-haired man that day but he'd lost himself in the softness of those rough hands sliding along his skin. The hands in his hair that felt so good.

The second round they eventually had in the shower that led to Shouta cleaning him gently. Carefully. Twisting together in bed with eyes on one another; trying to read the emotion in one another's eyes with hands stroking. Lips coming down on his. The warmth of having Shouta so close to him as they laid skin-to-skin together that afternoon with hands touching, petting, caressing. It was tender. Unfairly, completely tender the way they had touched one another last weekend.

It was just like the weekend before but this time the words of his confession hung in the air. Unacknowledged. Unspoken again. He wanted nothing more than to confess again and again how much he liked Shouta. He wished that he'd insisted on words to be spoken rather than to lose himself in the pleasure of his body. But there was something so overwhelming, something that just hummed through him.

The unlimited desire he felt for this man, the pleasure he got when those lips came down on his or when those big, rough hands were holding onto him. When Shouta was moaning, whining, groaning, grunting and whimpering in his ear. The sound of his voice being so close in his ears leaving him absolutely breathless. There's nothing he wants more than to be able to say that he was going to get his confirmation or rejection. That Shouta was going to surprise him.

That the next time they met there'd be an answer but the fact of the matter is that he simply doesn't know. He doesn't know when Shouta was going to give him an answer and he didn't know what he was going to do until then. How he was going to be able to look this man in the face without an answer? Without hearing what he wanted most to hear from him? And how did he demand it? How did he push for it?

He'd seen Shouta's face when he had said that he wanted this to be more than hookups. He'd seen the way his face had contorted slightly. How it had pinched before it smoothed out with the emotion behind it fading away as he walked away. He didn't understand it then and even recalling it, he didn't understand it now. Had it been guilt? Had it been regret? He had not a clue what that emotion had been when it pinched at Shouta's face.

He wished he could say with full confidence that he knew what it was. That he knew what the black-haired man had been thinking. What he'd been feeling. But he didn't know and that was the big catalyst. He didn't know what the hell went through Shouta's head when he had confessed to him. He had not a clue how the black-haired man was going to respond or how he was going to feel because of it.

There was nothing he wanted more than to figure out just what it was that Shouta was thinking. How he felt. He knew that he could ask him; that he could bring it up in conversation. That he could explain how he felt with the lack of an answer but he didn't want to pressure Shouta. He wanted the answer to come naturally. He wanted it to come truthfully. Genuinely. He wanted nothing more than for Shouta to speak from the heart.

To tell him what he wanted to hear the most; even if it did turn out to be a rejection. Even if it left him in tears, he wanted to hear how the black-haired man was feeling. What he was thinking, where he was at, and what he thought of everything. He couldn't help but feel he'd made a mess when he had introduced sex into their friendship when he knew that he wanted more. The tender way Shouta treated him after sex certainly wasn't helping a damn thing if he was being honest with himself.

No matter how nice it was to have those rough hands being so gentle on him, he knew that it was making it worse. That simply recalling it filled him with a longing so intense that it had him damn near crumbling. He wished he could ask Shouta what the point was; what was the idea of fucking him senseless then being so tender? Treating him like he was something more than a hook up? Treating him like he was his lover or something of the sort? Like he loved him?

What was the point in treating him like that? All it did was play with his heart. All it did was make his chest ache so fervently that it left him gasping in the wake of dreams that felt so sweet they were real. Dreams that came for him in the night that always left him with an aching longing burrowing into his chest. Leaving him to wonder if there was any possibility that it'd become reality. If Shouta was going to accept his confession and blow him away.

There was nothing he wanted more than to date Shouta exclusively; than to be able to call the black-haired man his boyfriend. There was nothing he wanted more than to be able to express the love he felt for him without worrying it would throw them off-kilter. But they were already so off-kilter that there was simply no going back to the way things had been. How could they? How could he when he knew how Shouta moved and twisted against him?

When he knew how the black-haired man felt inside of him? How it felt to be so tenderly treated after they'd had sex? How it felt to have those dark eyes on him while fingers traced down the side of his face gently? To see the awe in Shouta's eyes that always made them look so much bigger than they really were? How those full lips felt when they were coming down on his in kisses so tender they left him breathless? There was no going back.

There was no changing what had already been changed. There was no way that he could go back to being Shouta's friend again when he knew all of it. When he knew how it felt, how he felt, and there was no changing his feelings. If Shouta rejected him then that meant Shouta was going to be leaving his life permanently. There was no way things could go back to the platonic cluelessness that they'd been in beforehand. There was no pretending that he wasn't falling for this man.

That his heels were going to go over his head and he'd be in deep loving this man. Something that he feared with each passing day but he knew there was no denying it. He liked Shouta so much he was half convinced he was truly falling for this man who treated him so tenderly after fucking his brains out. What did he begin to say when he saw him again? What did he begin to explain to the black-haired man who always treated him with such patience?

He'd seen the impatience in Shouta when it came to his coworkers but it had never once been shown his way. He didn't understand why it hadn't but he didn't think to consider why the black-haired man was so patient with him. There was nothing he wanted more than to make sure that Shouta understood where he was coming from. How he felt. What he wanted, needed, and longed for from this situation. What he'd want the most when it came down to it.

While he'd been thinking of sex with Shouta for a little while, he couldn't deny that now that he had it, he wanted more. He wanted Shouta to feel the same way. He wanted Shouta to want him in that way that was more than physical. He knew he couldn't make Shouta fall in love with him or anything of the sort but he wanted nothing more than for the black-haired man to return his feelings. For him to know that, somehow, his feelings were returned to him.

He was more than eager to hear how the black-haired man felt for him. How he saw him. There was so much unknown when it came to Shouta that he wanted so desperately to figure out. He wanted to be able to unravel the man and figure out just how he felt for him. To figure out how the black-haired thought. What the man thought of him. Did Shouta feel the same way? Would there be a tenderness the way that there was if he didn't? Or was it purely to be polite?

To be sweet to him? He knew that the desire, the lust, was heavy and unmeasurable. He simply wanted Shouta. But like Oboro said, he knew what he really wanted and what he didn't want. He wanted to be in a proper relationship with Shouta. He wanted to be able to proudly call the other man his boyfriend. He didn't want this to simply be a hook up thing or a friends with benefits type of thing.

All he wants is to know how Shouta felt for him. What he felt for him. There was so much that was unknown, unthinkable, and it was hard to wrap his head around it when he didn't have the slightest inkling what Shouta felt for him. What he wanted from him. He wanted nothing more than to be able to pick apart the man if it meant that he could figure it out. Clearly, Shouta had been wanting him since Halloween.

It was all too easy, with his hindsight being what it was, that he could see the little tells. The way they had hugged. How those rough hands would find their ways into his. Even their disastrous first kiss had been led up too by the both of them. Shouta had wanted him for God knows how long and now that they'd broken the seal on sex it was clear the man was acting on it. Hell, even he was acting on it.

He wanted nothing more than to say that he wasn't but he knew that in all reality he was. He was acting on all the fantasies that he'd had when he was lying in bed trying to sleep. The fantasies that had plagued his mind when he was masturbating. God, he could still recall the first night he actively thought of the other man when he'd been touching himself. It had been utter mortifying if he was honest with himself but hadn't it told him exactly how he felt?

What he wanted from the black-haired man? He didn't want to think that he was purely using Shouta to release the sexual feelings he held for him. He didn't want Shouta to think that he was possibly confessing because they had sex. Fuck, it was the last thing that he wanted. Would Shouta view it that way? Would he see it as a confession that came after having sex? He should've confessed first. He knew he should have. Technically, though, didn't he?

He might have said it in anger but he'd gotten it out to the black-haired man, hadn't he? Shouta knew how he felt, whether he said it calmly or in a fit of anger, but did it make having sex with him right? Did it make anything about their twisted up, confusing relationship make sense? What could he do to make it make sense? What could he do to fix it when there didn't seem to be much, he could do to fix it? He wished he had the answers.

He wished he understood Shouta better but after seven months, he felt just as clueless when it came to Shouta as ever. Sighing out to himself, he ran his hand over Cappella who purred with her head nudging his hand when he scratched behind her ears gently. Sliding his hand down her body with the cat stretching out helpfully with a chirrup leaving the animal gently which had him smiling softly.

He didn't understand much about his relationship with Shouta but he knew that together they could come up with something. They could figure something out together. Something that would work for the both of them; they could start dating slowly. They could go on dates beforehand and get to know each other in a romantic setting. They could come together to learn more about one another as lovers. As friends.

They could take this one step at a time even if they had gone out of their way to complicate their friendship. The relationship between them was filled with sex but he was sure that they could find a balance. They could find a way to regain some control over the way things had spiraled out. Even if they knew each other sexually now, surely there would be other ways that they could get to know one another, couldn't there? He could learn Shouta in a new way on these dates.

He could learn more information from the black-haired man when he had the chance. He could take this one step at a time and figure it out as they went along. Would Shouta agree to something like that? After all, he didn't even have an answer to his confession. When he saw Shouta again, would it be too forward to request seeing where this could go? Would it be too forward to request an answer for his confession? Or would it be too pushy?

Too impatient of him? He didn't want to come across that way but he needed his answers, didn't he? Didn't he deserve that much from the black-haired man? Would Shouta touch him again sexually knowing what his feelings for him were? Or would he be left with a broken heart? Would there be nothing he could do about this? Or would Shouta return his feelings and they would take this one step at a time? There were so many possibilities.

So many different routes that this could take. He knew that he was a fool for adding sex to their friendship but Shouta was also at fault, wasn't he? After all, it was Shouta who engaged and it was himself who didn't stop it. Who didn't think to stop it. Who should have stopped it. But he hadn't; he didn't think once to stop it in the five times they'd fucked that first time or the two other times they fucked last weekend. He didn't think to stop it in its tracks.

He'd been too blinded by the passion. By the grip the lust had on him. There was nothing he wanted more than to lose himself into the black-haired man's hold when he had the chance to do so. He was eager. Excited. Needy. Wanting. There had been no thoughts in his head when Shouta had asked to kiss him after he'd confessed. He hadn't even considered the mere idea of saying no when he'd been thinking of kissing the man for days before then.

Oboro was right; he had horrible self-control skills. He damn near didn't have any when it came to Shouta. He wished that he could say that he could hold out, but would he? If Shouta came over right now and stripped down, could he say no? Could he keep himself from touching him? From fucking him? Kissing him? He didn't know. And that was a horrifying thing to consider; that he didn't have the self-control not to act on the lust.

The thrumming desire he felt under his skin. He wished he could have better self-control but after months of fantasizing about it, he knew how good the reality of it was. There was no one that could get him more excited than Shouta. No one who could turn him on more. And he knew that it wasn't an excuse to act on his desire, his arousal, but God if he didn't want too. If he didn't want to twist up with Shouta each time.

If he didn't want to run his hands through those black curls or to touch those stubble covered cheeks of his. If he didn't want to feel the slide of Shouta's sweaty skin against his own. The way his hands traveled over his skin and caressed his body when they were interlocked physically. It was how their fifth round had started; Shouta's cock had been resting inside of him innocently and it had led to that fifth round.

He was surprised Shouta had the stamina for it, honestly. He was surprised by this man's stamina but he knew that his own was rather impressive. But he couldn't deny that sex had overcomplicated everything. It had made a mess of everything even if it felt good during the moment. Even if it left him tingling with an aching crotch when he recalled it, he knew that he and Shouta needed to fix this. They needed to work this out and figure out just what they wanted from one another.

Where they wanted to possibly take this relationship of theirs. They needed to talk this out together and they needed to figure it out together. Rubbing his hand over Cappella's side, he felt those purrs jumping up in intensity when he found another yawn crawling up his throat. Bursting out of him before he could stop it as he ran his hand along the cats side. He knew he should go in the bathroom to wash his face and moisturize.

He needed to brush his teeth. And yet he was far, far too comfy in the place that he was in at the moment. Petting the cat in his lap again and again, he loved the rumbling purrs of hers beneath his palm and fingers. He looked down at the cat who tilted her head back with those vivid, beautiful blue eyes looking up at him with adoration. He could see it in the way she blinked slowly at him with eyes closing in contentment when he scratched the spot in front of her ear gently.

There was nothing he adored more than his cats. Now that he thought about it, Shouta had three cats, didn't he? A big black one, a big orange one, and a sleek, beautiful white cat. He ought to ask about them sometime. There was no harm in asking, was there? Maybe if he began to show even more interest in Shouta's life then the black-haired man would feel more comfortable giving him an answer. Or was there a way to fuck that up? Would Shouta take it the wrong way?

God, he spent so much time thinking about this one man that he wondered how he hadn't become a pain on everyone else who lived with him. He sighed out as he slid his hand over Cappella again as the calico purred up at him with contentment. He wished that he knew what the right thing was to do. He wished he knew what he was supposed to do that would help ease any misgivings Shouta might have. Wished he could do something that told Shouta he was painfully interested in seeing where this could go.

That he wanted nothing more than to be more involved in his life. That he wanted to be with him romantically without scaring him away. He didn't know what to do going forward but he knew that Oboro was right. He needed his answer. He needed to know how Shouta felt. And he needed to figure out it out sooner rather than later. After all, it would be better to know how Shouta felt sooner rather than later. It would be better to know how he felt now rather than being left in this limbo again.

He couldn't do it again; he couldn't take weeks of silence while Shouta figured his shit out. He knew it might be pushing it, knew he might be impatient about it, but didn't he deserve an answer? Didn't he deserve to know if Shouta felt the same? Couldn't the black-haired man give him that much at least? He wants nothing more than to know if the feeling was returned. If Shouta felt anything for him like he hoped. Like he suspected.

Surely it wouldn't take the black-haired man weeks to figure out if he had romantic feelings, would it? He knew it might be pushy, might be impatient, but God if he doesn't want to know what the black-haired man thought of him. If he didn't want to know if those romantic feelings were returned as the heated, lustful ones were. He could get that much out of Shouta, couldn't he? Didn't he deserve to know how the black-haired man felt for him? It left him feeling selfish.

Self-centered. Wanting to know something purely for his own relief. For his own satisfaction and peace of mind. Was that selfish? Or was it merely rational? He wished he could talk to Nemuri about this. Or Oboro. But the couple had claimed they were exhausted after their day and were headed to be early for the night which meant he couldn't call them up. Even if he could, did he want to bring his drama to the couple who had certainly heard enough of it over the past several months?

Sighing out again to himself, he ran his hand over the calico in his lap when the bed wobbled as Twix jumped up onto it with Sterling not far behind him. Both cats peering at him curiously when Twix then padded forward hesitantly before moving in a circle then plopping down onto the bed in a circle. His paws stretched out to knead at the bed with a chirping meow leaving the cat.

He smiled softly as he reached over to stroke over Twix's head, gently scratching behind his ears, then straightening up when the calico in his lap complained. Sterling padded over him when he clicked his tongue gently, curling his fingers, and in an instant she was there. Rubbing her little face against his fingers delightedly with purrs wracking her small body when she flopped down against his thigh. Stretching out with white paws spreading out briefly before she was pressing her head back into his thigh.

Her little paws batting at Cappella's tail with her light blue eyes shimmering with curiosity. His little baby. He adored his cats the same way that he adored his sons; they were his babies too. He ran his hand over her little body which had her purring furiously with her eyes closing with contentment then as her toying with Cappella's tail was forgotten. He hoped that he could figure this out. That somehow, he'd find his middle ground.

He'd stop teetering wildly the way that he was from one side to the next. That he'd stop weaving uncertainly into a future with Shouta that was opaque. Something he couldn't make out properly. He sighed out softly with his hand sliding over the cats that purred furiously in his lap and against his thighs. He should really do his face washing routine, his face felt dirty, but he didn't want to bother with it. Not when he was stripped down to his boxers.

He looked to the TV that was murmuring; filling the gap of his bedroom comfortingly when he grabbed the remote beneath Sterling and pointed it at the TV. Turning it off, he then returned the remote to the bedside table with a light clatter when he then gently coaxed the cats away. Reaching across the bed, fidgeting and sliding with the blanket bunching up, he turned the lamp out on the right side plunging the right of the room into darkness.

Allowing him to see the curtains pulled tightly over the window. He then reached up to touch his ears lightly with the cats chirruping at him in response when he then turned his hearing aids off then tugged them gently out of his then turned to grab their charging case to slide them into it to charge overnight. It was so convenient as compared to the pairs he had as a child; his mothers were always buying him batteries for his hearing aids up until he was twelve when the doctor recommended a new brand of hearing aids.

Ones that could be charged overnight; something that they accepted without thinking twice about it. He'd stuck with that brand for most of his young adult life. He reached up to grab his glasses to slip them off of his nose then placing them in the glasses gaze before reaching under the lamp shade. Plunging the room into darkness, he shifted in the bed before laying out on his side. And then, as he stuffed the pillow beneath his cheek and neck, his phone screen was lighting up.

Who could be texting him now? It wasn't exactly late; it was only nine oh five but he had to be up early tomorrow. He was going to be going from one job to the next. Fuck, that reminded him, he'd need to leave money for Nemuri and Oboro money to get pizza or dinner of some kind. It was the least he could do; he wasn't going to make them watch two six-year-olds and make them cook dinner.

Reaching over for his phone, he squinted against the brightness when he blinked at the text message he found waiting for him from Shouta. What was the black-haired man doing? Didn't he have grading? Would he be distracting Shouta if he talked to him now? It wouldn't be the first time he texted the man before he went to sleep so surely, it'd be fine to text him now? Dragging his teeth over his bottom lip, he unlocked his phone screen then tapped on the notification from Shouta.

He'd text him back and then head to bed. After all, he was ready for bed even if he felt off-kilter abandoning his face washing routine for the night. He shifted in bed, the pillow stuffed comfortably beneath his neck and cheek. It was a strange feeling of Deja vu as he curled up on his side with his phone in his hands. Hadn't they done this the previous time? Only the last time he'd actually washed and moisturized his face and neck.

Tonight felt like he was a bit sloppier but that feeling of Deja vu didn't dissipate in the slightest bit. Did he want to text with Shouta before bed again? Would it be smart to do so? Was this going to be something silly? Or was it going to be something serious? What was Shouta's goal in texting him right before he went to bed? He knew the man couldn't know but it was eerie how similar it was to a week ago. He took a slow, deep breath then let it out when he pulled the phone closer to him as the texts loaded up and filled his screen.

Shouta: hey zashi u still up? or r u sleeping?

Hizashi: You caught me right as I took my glasses and hearing aids out! I'm in bed at the moment, totally ready for bed 😴

Hizashi: Why, what's up? Don't you have a bunch of grading to do? And tests that you have lined up for your class? I don't want to be distracting you, Shouta 😟

Shouta: well ur not really distracting me if IM the one who texted U

Shouta: bc i need 2 talk 2 u even if its brief

Shouta: but if ud rather i can text u in the morning? i dont want 2 keep u up

Hizashi: No, no! Feel free to tell me what you need to tell me! Honestly, if you dropped that and then refused to text more to elaborate, I might just rip my hair out wondering what it is, you know?

Hizashi: So please, go on! What do you need to talk to me about, Sho?

Shouta: well ive been thinkin about ur confession

Shouta: ive been thinking about tht day a lot, actually

Shouta: and i wanted 2 apologize for the sex part after u confessed

Shouta: it wasnt right of me to initiate that after u were so vulnerable wit me

Shouta: and i dont want u 2 think every time we meet we'll hook up, u know? or tht i only want sex frm u

Hizashi: Then what do you want from me, Shouta? What more could you possibly want? I want to hear you say it and I just

Hizashi: I'd like to say that I regret fucking you after I confessed but I don't feel regretful at all

Hizashi: Sure, maybe it wasn't smart after I just confessed but I mean, I'm not going to deny it and say it wasn't hot as fuck because it WAS. Being fucked in the kitchen has always been a fantasy of mine and you just gave it to me without thinking twice!

Hizashi: But if it was really a problem, I could've said no. I could've stopped you. Or stopped it from happening but I didn't. So, I don't regret anything about what happened

Shouta: well, im glad U dont regret it but i kinda do

Shouta: not in the way u think! i mean, i think it was def hot 2 do tht in the kitchen

Shouta: but i just feel like u think i only want sex & thts not the case in the slightest bit bc i just

Shouta: uk what? this isnt something i want 2 say over text for once

Hizashi: You don't? I'm surprised! We normally have some pretty heavy conversations of text but I won't push for it even if this is going to drive me CRAZY

Hizashi: But you know what? I'm willing to wait. I'm willing to hear whatever it is that you want to say to me, you know? I want to hear you say it face to face and that's more than fair for me to wait for 😌

Shouta: thank u

Shouta: how about we talk 2morrow when u get outta work?

Hizashi: I would love to say yes, a million times yes, but I'm actually going to be working from 8:00 to 4:00 and closing up the store. Then I got my radio thing from 11:00 to early the next morning but if you wanted you could come by the shop after I close?

Hizashi: I know it might be a bit difficult but it's about the only time I have in between both jobs, you know? I'm going to be flying from one place to the next and I'll be lucky if I even say goodnight to the boys before they go to bed tomorrow night.

Shouta: i have absolutely no problem wit stopping by at the store if u dont mind having me there when u close up

Shouta: i can have my sister look after Eri again or i could drop her off at urs? id have nem or oboro watch her but they both r watching toshi and izuku right?

Hizashi: Yeah, they are! And I can text them but I don't think it'd be a problem for them! We can talk to them both tomorrow! 😊

Shouta: perfect then i'll text oboro in the morning & i'll get back 2 u about wht he says when it comes to watching eri

Hizashi: Awesome! I honestly look forward to seeing Eri again, I can't wait to hold her! I bet she's gotten so big while I've not seen her and I'm going to utterly CRY when I see her, Shouta, I swear.

Shouta: then i'll make sure 2 have some tissues when u do 😌

Shouta: anyways, i'll let u go 2 sleep if ur tired

Shouta: god knows we'll have PLENTY 2 talk about 2morrow

Hizashi: We've both got a big, big day tomorrow, huh?

Hizashi: I'll let you get back to working though! I'll talk to you tomorrow, Shouta

Hizashi: By the way, I think I'm going to change your name in my phone

Shouta: 2 wht?

Hizashi: That's my secret for now! Good night, Shouta! I'll talk to you tomorrow! 😌

Sho-chan: talk 2 u 2morrow 😌