"I can't believe this happened." Aria mumbles to herself Monday morning during our free period. Mumbling to herself seems to be her new thing these days. I know something is up with their stalker, but she still keeps me in the dark.
This odd behavior makes me look at her from my drawing pad. We're both sitting on a bench in the courtyard with other kids sitting at tables during this free period. I have my back to one of the pillars with one of my legs stretched out toward her on the other end of the bench while my other leg is bent towards me holding up my book to draw on. My foot is on her lap, my light blue jeans slightly ripped up at the knee from falling off my board this morning. They need to fix those sidewalks. She was doing homework while I'm drawing a sketch for my art class but when I look over at her she's now looking at her phone, seeming annoyed. She's been a bit off all day. I haven't asked about it to give her the space, but now she kind of made it too obvious.
"What's up?"
For a second she seems to not notice I said something, then it processes and she looks at me. She takes a breath and shakes her head, "I...what?"
I half smile, "You mumbled that you can't believe something happened. What's wrong?"
She bites her lip, "It...has to do with the person I told you about." Now she presses her lips together, "The person we can't talk about."
I know who she means obviously, their stalker. But I take a breath 'cause I feel like she needs to spill what's bothering her. "Tell me." I say simply, "I don't care what it is, just tell me so you can get it off your chest."
Her eyes bug out a bit, "Jessie, no. We had this conversation."
"Aria…" I set my other leg straight and put the sketchpad down onto my lap and stare her dead in the eyes, "You can't expect me to know what's going on and not offer some type of help. I know you want to deal with it yourself, but it's been over a month since you told me and you're still having issues."
"Jess…"
"No, Ria." I don't let her finish, now swinging my legs over the bench and scoot closer. "I need to know. I can't do this anymore."
Her eyes are wide as she looks at me, almost like she's going to pass out in a way. Her face looks stumped, not seeming sure if she knows what to say. Then finally she shifts her eyes away from mine and looks around the courtyard, as if searching for wandering eyes. Then she looks back at me, her eyes saddening now. "You're not going to like it. And I'm sorry in advance."
This confuses me to a huge extent. Why is she apologizing when it's about her problem? "Um...okay?"
"Jessie, this is hard for me to say."
"Ria, breathe."
Aria takes a deep breath, running her hand through her long dark smooth hair. Then she opens her mouth and says, "The person who doesn't leave us alone made Hanna send my mom to the museum I was at."
I blink slowly, not understanding what she's getting at, "Why is that a bad thing?"
"Because this person was trying to get me caught with the guy I've been seeing."
It's like nothing else processed besides that last part and I smile, "You're seeing someone?" I half laugh, "Why didn't you tell me?"
She bites her lip again, closing her eyes and this makes me scared now as my smile drops. "Because it's Ezra."
My head spins from her words and my face goes into confusion at first, before that confusion turns into disbelief. Then both of those go away as my emotions spiral into what feels like I'm going crazy, and then lastly, anger. So I laugh, a half hearted one. "You…" I laugh a bit more, then clench my jaw. "You've been what?!"
"Jessie, please." she says in fear, turning her head to the other kids.
I realize how loud I was and hiss a bit to myself, this isn't the time or place for something like this. She's dating someone who is basically my brother, the guy who saved my life and didn't tell me. Not to mention he's her teacher, he's in his 20s AND she's a minor. So when I turn to look where she is staring I notice that some people are watching us as if we're out of our minds. Then I look back at her, a little bit of anger in my eyes.
"D-Don't look at me like that."
"Like what?" I play stupid, "As if you didn't just tell me that you're dating someone who is important to me?" I say this in a hushed voice.
"Jessie, I'm sorry. I couldn't risk it since he's older. And I was scared you'd hate me because of how close you guys are."
I sigh a bit, rubbing my forehead. "I don't hate you. Hating you isn't in my nature, Ria. But he's more than just older than you."
"I know. I do. It kind of just happened."
I watch her for a second, trying to keep my temper down. I may not hate her but it doesn't mean I'm not upset about what's going on. "Happened when exactly?"
She presses her lips together and takes a breath, "The day I got home from Iceland."
I blink slowly, watching her carefully. "You've been with him since September?"
She slowly nods now, "I went to a pub to get food and he was sitting there. He didn't know I was underage."
"That's...not the point. He knows now and it's November. You've been together this long, illegally dating and didn't even try to tell me?"
Aria rubs her eye a bit, as if trying to hold herself together. "I wanted to multiple times. I just didn't know how. And if anyone found out it would end his career."
"God, Aria. Obviously I'd know that. I'm not an idiot. I wouldn't be dumb enough to blab to the world that my best friend is dating someone they shouldn't be. It's the fact that my best friend didn't trust me enough to say anything." she tries to speak but now I'm heated, "Or the fact that the whole school already thinks me and him are together so when what I thought were rumors of him dating a student circled around, I was the main focus. Do you have any idea how that feels?"
She gulps a bit now, watching me carefully as we hear the bell ring. "Jessie, I'm sorry. I'm really sorry."
People are shuffling out of the courtyard now, making me look at them. Luckily no one is paying attention anymore so I take the opportunity to start packing up my stuff too. "This is not the type of conversation I was expecting when you said Hanna was told to do something sketchy." I stop, staring at her again as my eyes widen from realization. "Don't tell me all of them knew before me."
She flinches from the look on my face and the way I asked the question, making me know the answer. "They found out by accident because of the stalker."
I half laugh in annoyance now, standing up. "I should just go fuck myself then, huh?" I say sarcastically, but obviously serious about it.
She blinks slowly, shaking her head rapidly. "It's... it's not like that."
"Not like what?" I say with a hard tone to my voice and put my backpack strap over my shoulder, "Not like you're keeping secrets from me?"
"It's…"
"Complicated. I know the drill." I shake my head, watching her with a mix of anger and worry that she's dating a teacher while this person is holding it over her head.
"Jessie, please." She says through what sounds like a choking sound from holding back her tears.
"I can't even process this right now."
"But…"
"I'll see you later." I grip the strap to my bag and then walk away. What was she thinking? Dating Ezra. That is not going to end well if her parents find out.
...
For a few days I didn't talk to Aria, still ticked off from what she told me. Maybe I reacted a little too harshly knowing that things happen. I'm not mad that she is dating him because he's a great guy. I'm mad that she didn't tell me, and I'm slightly mad that she's risking getting him into serious trouble by being with her. I mean, if he is caught she won't be the one behind bars, he will, because by law she may be old enough to consent but if her parents say otherwise from still being under 18 and the fact he's her teacher, his life will be over.
This behavior of course is noticed by the girls and even by Mike and my uncle. I tried to be civil while around others, but it wasn't the easiest thing to do. With Mike and Uncle Byron I played it off like I was just tired from the workload I have right now, which wasn't a lie. But when it came to the girls that was a little harder to hide the truth from. I knew that she hadn't told them what happened, otherwise they would have talked to me about it. I knew she didn't say anything because then she'd have to let slip that she told me about their stalker, so all I said was that I didn't want to get into it and just needed time to myself after the argument I had with her. Funny enough, since Hanna did what she did Aria and her were also not in the best of moods with each other, so that was also noticed by their friends, making it seem as if we all had something up our asses.
I even avoided Ezra, not talking to him in school or out. Of course the only time I had to was when I was in his class and he'd call on me, but I know he knew something was wrong when I'd make excuses to leave class as soon as the bell rang or didn't give him the time of day to hang out. So after those few days of being mad at the world he catches me leaving The Brew and walking to the store. I have my keys in one hand, about to open the door with a bag of food and coffee in the other
"Jessie." his soft and concerned sounding voice comes to my ears behind me.
I take a breath, a little annoyed with the thought of talking to him. So I turn my head, staring at him with the best nice face I can muster, "Sorry, Ezra, not in the best of moods today."
"You haven't seemed in the best of moods for a while, Jessie." I go to say something but he doesn't let me finish, "Aria told me you know."
I blink slowly at him, kind of shocked to hear that come out of his mouth considering the way I found out wasn't ideal. How would she have spun that story without telling him about Hanna. "Oh."
"I know you're upset..."
I cut him off with a snort, "I'm more than upset, Ezra."
"I-I know. I do." he walks closer, because obviously this is a delicate situation and it can't be talked about out in the open. "A bombshell like that should have come from me. But I know she felt guilty for hiding it and needed to tell you."
I stare at him, trying not to look so shocked at the fact that she told him without telling the actual truth to how it happened. "No, Ezra. It should have 100% come from Aria. I'm not upset that it's happening. I'm upset that she waited too long to tell me."
"We know it was selfish…"
"Selfish? Ezra, it's dangerous. Both of you will have a bad reputation if it's found out by the wrong person."
He half smiles, nodding slowly. "I get the concern, I do. But we're happy. We just want your blessing."
I watch him carefully for a while, licking my lips. "I'm not sure how to answer that."
He sighs and sets his hand to my shoulder and I have to try hard not to pull away from him because I don't want to be touched right now. However, I don't and just look up at him. "I know it's a lot to grasp, and I know it's dangerous, but I'm willing to ruin my life for her."
That kind of takes me off guard, seeing that his eyes are lit up. Someone willing to get fired from their job or even go to jail for someone is rare. Now I understand more why I'd see him so much happier than he used to be, it's because he's been with her this whole time. So I just take a breath and nod, knowing the feeling because of Andrew. "I...I get it, I do. I just need time to process."
I see the relief course through him as he takes a breath and slowly smiles with a nod, "That's all I ask is to give us a chance and have some faith in us."
I half laugh at that, "Faith isn't exactly my friend lately."
He sadly smiles, understanding I said this because of the fact that I lost my family. Not only was my faith gone but so was most of my hope and my spark for a lot of things. "Then trust us at least. We wouldn't be taking such a risk if we weren't serious."
I press my lips together, continuing to stare into his blue eyes, still aware that he's holding onto my shoulder. So I nod, trying not to roll my own eyes in a bit of annoyance. "Fine. I'll try."
"That's all we ask." he smiles softly and sets his hand back to his side.
I rub my head a bit, shaking it in a bit of hopelessness. "I don't know how you're going to make this work knowing you can't be seen in public."
He half smiles, knowing this is a valid point. "We are taking it step by step and one day at a time.
