It was a mistake to come to school today. The depression clouds have rolled back in, thick and gloomy.
My head buzzes still at the loudness in the hallways, and I long for the peaceful comfort of Marinette's room. As much as I love Nathalie, there are way to many sad memories at home for me to be at peace right now.
I feel a nudge and look up to see Nino staring at me. "Teacher called you twice, dude," he looks concerned. Before I would have put on a brave face and slogged my way through the school day, but I'm slowly learning to speak up for myself. I raise my hand, asking to talk to Ms. B.
She understands, patting my shoulder. "I'm proud of you for speaking up, Adrien. That must not have been easy." "Thanks. See you soon."
I shoulder my backpack, grateful the halls are quiet. "Good job, kid," Plagg pokes his head out and I feed him a cube of cheese.
I turn right, heading for the bakery, breathing in the smells of dough and coffee, and Mama Cheng looks up with surprise. "Adrien! Shouldn't you be in school?" "I couldn't handle it, today, Mama Cheng. I feel so heavy and foggy. Does depression make us all like us?"
Her smile is gentle. "Depression wears many different faces, for we all different. Would you like a cup of tea?" I nod.
The tea is soothing and warm, and I like the quiet company. Mama Cheng will ever be Mother, but I love her very much…..
I drift into my thoughts, sinking down into foggy memories.
"Adrien! Where are you?" I call here Mother's call from here in the garden where I was playing, but right now, I'm scared. The sky is growling with black clouds rolling in, and ever so often it flashes with a bright light.
"Mama! I'm in the flowers! I'm scared!" Mother finds me, scooping me up. "I'm here, Adrien. Now, how about a good hot bath and then some cookies?" My head shoots up from where it was nestled in her shoulder. "Cookies?" She grins. "I should have protected you, and I was a scared kitty."
"Adrien, it's okay to be scared some times. But we found each other and now we're safe."
Safe. My hand starts to shake. I should have protected Mother better. Played quietly with Felix instead of getting jealous. A sob claws away at my chest, and Mama finds my hand. "Come here."
Mama leads me to the couch, where she makes a nest of blankets, letting me cry. She doesn't frown or scold, only comforts me.
Crying takes a lot out of me, and I fall into slumber. When I wake, it's near suppertime, and I can feel the weight of a blanket, smelling like my favorite smell of the dryer. And Marinette is with me now.
"I heard you've been crying," she says, stroking my hair. I sniffle. "Depression hurts, Marinette. But here is a cozy nest." "If you need to cry, just cry." I feel a tear splash into my hair. I sit up, finding wetness on her cheek. "Your crying too."
"I don't like to see you hurting. I should have known the signs." I lean forward, kissing her. "Your here now, and I'm home. I may not be okay today, but with you, I can take the first step."
She kisses me back. "Whatever you need, I'll be here. And one more thing," she adds. "I love you."
