Deadpool walked onto a stage, where there was only a camera watching him.

"Ugh, can't believe the author is making me do this. It was only MINOR internal bleeding, and the doctors were able to sew his leg back on." Eh, whatever. He had things to do. Like remember what the hell continuity was.

"Alright, this is our first Q&A, AMA, random request fill in, and so on and so forth." The merc drawled on, "The first question is from a guest named Just Some Random- Wow, great name. Not as awesome as yours truly, but still- OW!" Deadpool was hit on the head for using sarcasm to insult a viewer, "Oh, so THAT's how it is! fine... He asks: Will you ever consider doing a Yang x Tifa thing for real? - Wow, you're really just going to embolden the question? That's lazy. Anyways, the author told me to tell you that, ahem," He put on a really squeaky voice, as if to insult a person that could let most of the fighters have a carbonadium sword or take chimichangas off the menu - but whatever.

"That's a running gag. Unless if Blake shows up, the only thing you'll get is a ship tease." He finished- "BUT! He also said, though not on the script, that if the catgirl shows her fluffy little ears, that he'd write a jealous Tifa competing for Yang's affection! So get on it fanboys! Blake Bella-licious-donna for Death Battle!"

"A guest wonders how I liked my movie." Deadpool paused, then burst into laughter, "Okay, so… So get this: Tom Rothman, the guy who mandated that Wade's mouth be sewn shut in Origins, claimed that this movie wouldn't be a hit. He left because he was afraid that it would bomb. GUESS WHAT, MORON!" The merc nearly keeled over from the sheer irony of the whole thing. "The best part is that my movie made more money on opening night than the last movie he greenlit in its entire lifetime!"

"Here's one from… Aimee. Who asks What's my favorite ice cream? Well, I fought an ice cream truck once. But, someone made ice cream in the shape of my logo," He pointed to his icon on his belt, "That guy is like, awesome."

"Anyways, this one is from… Yami-no-Raiden, he asks: Hey, Yang, how would you feel about Yusei Fudo joining the DB Hotel? (He does have his own motorcycle) Again with making the question bold? Wow. Lazy much? - Anyways, Yusei would be welcome here. Anyone who can play card games on a motorcycle is always awesome! Plus, she'd enjoy making Tifa jealous about-off!" Dude, carbonadium sword. Just sayin'. "Tch, whatever. Anyways, he'd have to enter a Death Battle to get into this place, so it's unlikely that the… Fudgo guy could compete in the first place."

"Spiderpool wants to know who'd I'd want to fight if given the chance." Deadpool paused "Uh, this fic is based on Death Battle. Y'know, the one that pits two characters against each other in a fight to the death. I fought Deathstroke there.

"The next question comes from The Layman." Deadpool muttered something about getting burned in some fic that the author may or may not have faved (Hey, Deadpool here. I locked the author in a closet, so I can type this myself. But, seeing as he'd take the chapter down if I submit what I want to see, I'm going to have to keep myself PG-13. Which SUCKS because the last time I was PG-13, I got my fucking mouth sewn shut. Hey! I can swear a lot more here! SWEET! I'm gonna get out all of the swears I've been holding in because of dumboob's insistence. Give me a second.) "FUCK! DAMNIT! SON OF A SHIT-WEASEL! BITCHY BARBRA STREISAND! LASEC SHIT-BISCUITS! FUCK!" I ranted off… Nah, Deadpool will write himself in the third person, because Deadpool is awesome like that.

"Where was I?" The handsome merc asked to a room that would normally be filled with Bea Arthur, my fans, and even Death. (God rest her soul (Bea Arthur's, not Death's (She's Death. Plus, she's a hottie!))) who would be cheering me- I mean Deadpool- on. But is not.

"Oh, right! Layman's question: Dante's thoughts on D.M.C, what are they?"

"Glad you asked! We have a little clip of Dante's rant after going through the game, right about here..."


… Dante was speechless when he saw the reviews for it. Needless to say, they were conflicted.

Critics were giving it perfect scores, and fans were giving it terrible scores on the various sites, and there wasn't even much to say about it.

Sure, he enjoyed the step-up in flashiness, but it felt like… Ryu's new game. It just didn't feel like it was completed. Seriously, where was that good old Castlevania feel? And they blatantly used politics as a metaphor for something...

He wasn't a fan of his makeover, and he felt like a piece of crap after even seeing it. He spent an entire week checking himself in the mirror to make sure that his original appearance wasn't tainted by that…

Thing.

Ryu also couldn't believe what he was seeing. The Dante he knew being so similar to Spider-Man in terms of quips, was gone. Instead there was this guy who was almost half as brooding as Guts. GUTS!

On the brighter side, Guts offered to kill the 'imposter', as many of Dante's friends were calling him, at his request…

Or if he ever shows his ugly mug at the hotel.

In the end, Dante had only one thing to say, "Dammit. Now I'M dead too. So, this is how Ken feels."

Ryu raised an eyebrow until he remembered the new appearance of his friend and shuddered.


"So, as you can see, Dante's not too happy about it." I- er, I mean, Deadpool smirked. "I'd say he deserves it, there's only room for ONE red-clad smart-ass damage sponge, and that's- aahsdflksahfashf"

Ugh, FINALLY. I got the laptop back.

Hmm, well, too much went into the previous stuff, so I can't really go over it again. But, I always figured Spider-Man to be a better red-clad quip-master than Wade.

Eh, maybe that's just me.

"You're damn right it's just you! I'm way more- HEY! No deleting my Cluster F Bomb! I'll just go back and reclaim it anyways!" The degenerate whined "And I don't whine! Whining is for little girls! I am a man. MEN have a civil dispute."

"Okay, so maybe there are those fanboys, but still."

"And maybe there were those wars…"

...

"Okay! Okay! Stop with the half-assed dialogue! I get it now! Men ARGUE. They call each other names over the internet, and feel proud of themselves for 'proving' people wrong about a debate that they take WAY too seriously."

Thank you.

"Whatever, next question! Let's see…"

Uh, actually Deadpool, I'll cut you a bit of slack here, I wanna adress something.

"Okay. But a quick heads up: You misspelled 'address' moron!"

Carbonadium sword, under EVERYBODY'S pillow.

"Tch, whatever. I'm going to get my tacos. I'm feeling like tacos right now."

Uh huh. Anyways, you may have noticed that I mentioned series 'Going Meta.' Named after the RvB segment where The Meta shows up, this is what happens when the stakes are raised. It typically comes a bit before a major event or during one. It's after this event, or during the 'Cerberus Catalyst' as I like to call it, that the characters are no longer actors. The stakes are raised. I think that about covers it, I'll reply to any other questions.

YO! Deadpool! You're back up again!

"Ugh, I'm EATING here!"

He swallowed his taco, and got back up on the stage.

"Alright, Qrow's Talon was wondering: I'm really surprized that Vegeta isn't with Goku and Superman considering the fact that while they travel to other dimensions if Goku does any fighting there he will get stronger. Stronger than Vegeta. Which Vegeta obviously wouldn't want."

"Simply put, Vegeta is waiting for worthy opponents to train against. He wants to fight against a variety of warriors. He said, and I quote: A saiyan prince like myself shouldn't limit himself to fighting a low-class warrior like Kakarot! Or something like that." He did a rather impressive imitation of Vegeta there.

"Thanks, X!"

Wow. A compliment, I'm surprised Wade.

"I'm not a complete asshole."

I never said you were. Now, we need to get to the next question.

Deadpool nodded, "Right… Someone named NOT DEADPOOL, asks: How come you're so damn sexy?" Deadpool grinned.

Uh, I don't think this question is appropriate-

"Excellent question! See, the secret is being as awesome as me!"

"What? You thought I was going to say something inappropriate?"

I will make no comment on that.

Alright, I think we're good here. Let's wrap this up.


AN: Alright, the first Q&A is over. If you want to see another one, just say so in the review section. If there's a question for specific characters, that will be done in a few other chapters.

Heavily expositional chapter is just ridden with exposition.

Yes. Yes it is, Wade.

Y'know, doing this makes me want to be more friendly to The Layman too…

Really? That's very big of you Wade. I think that this might be some good character development for you-

I'm still gonna rib on you in his reviews though.

Figures. Well, I guess it's time for the disclaimer now-

I returned it, but I'll take care of it.

Oh… Thanks…

Yeah, whatever. Just get outta here already! Get some sleep. Monty Oum may be the primary reason that this fic even exists, but that's no reason to emulate his sleeping schedule.

I kinda want to say the same thing to Death Battle's 3D Animator, Torian. Well, G'night Deadpool.

Night! *Door closes* The moron here doesn't own the characters.

I heard that!

Shit! Woobwoobwoobwoobwoob!