A/N: To give you a little update: I've got 6 chapters left to write and then the story will be finished! At the current pace, it's gonna take ~7–8 weeks to finish uploading, but I'm considering a slight increase of the pace to three chapters a week (I'm thinking tuesday, thursday, and saturday?), which would finish the story in six weeks.
The new armour does look good.
Where before, Azula was impressed by how well Katara wears the regular armour, the bespoke armour is absolutely perfect. It fits just right, accentuates Katara's best features, finally shows her as the incredible warrior she is. The helmet's front is shaped like the maws of a dragon, with huge teeth over the mouth and ridges over the eyehoes. The royal seal shines from the chestplate, covered in gold, and under different circumstances, Azula might describe her feelings upon seeing Katara put it on for the first time as pride. A more neutral party might more honestly use the word 'possessive'.
It also protects all vital organs and blood vessels as well as possible, something Katara values higher than whatever feelings the sight causes in Azula.
From then on, Katara spends every waking moment shadowing Azula. The throne room becomes her second home as she stands beside her, face unknowable behind the helmet's face plate, a symbol of the Fire Lord's power and untouchability. Azula hears petitioners and Katara is right by her side. She inspects the capital city regiment's training facilities, and Katara is right behind her every step of the way. To anyone else, she is just another bodyguard, albeit one in a more remarkable uniform.
To Azula, she is safety. Comfort. Trust.
Faith.
Katara's identity under the armour may be an open secret, or so she guesses, but if anyone takes issue, they know not to bring it up. More than once, she notices courtiers staring at her as if trying to pierce through the helmet, uncertain if it's her or not. She takes pleasure in turning her helmet towards them, even if her eyes are looking elsewhere, and watching them squirm under what they must assume to be her watchful gaze. It's the least revenge she can take on these people.
Azula notices. Of course she does.
"So. You enjoy torturing people, I see."
She casually throws the words at Katara while they're sparring, and the effect is as welcome as immediate. Katara stumbles and catches a fire blast that hurls her across the floor.
"What?"
"I've seen the way you stare at them. I think Lord Langzi was about to run from the room."
Katara shrugs and throws a wave back that knocks Azula off her feet.
"It's fun."
"I never knew you had such a sadistic streak to you. Who would have thought what's hiding behind that innocent face?"
"Oh shut up!"
Nevertheless, Katara can't help but laugh.
"If it's any consolation", Azula comments between flames, "you're doing me a favour if he thinks I'm keeping a close eye on him. He should."
Katara's water wipes a fire blast aside and turns into a stream that shoots towards Azula.
"Why's that?"
"Langzi? He has a wife and two sons. But", she sends a ring of fire that makes Katara jump up, "he also has a game keeper on his country estate he visits almost every month. Terribly convenient that his family doesn't enjoy hunting, don't you think?"
"What? …Oh."
"That's right." Azula ducks to dodge a bunch of icicles and throws fire just in time to melt the ice that threatens to encase her. "He's after something when he goes away for the weekend, and it's not the grizzly-deers."
That sends Katara into a laughing fit. Too late, she recognises the trap, and Azula's kick sweeps her legs out from under her. With Azula on top of her, she's still laughing and Azula can't help but join in. Once it's clear Katara is defeated, Azula rolls off of her, and they lie on the floor side by side, laughing.
"So", Katara pants, "that's the guy you've…"
"Blackmailed", Azula says helpfully. "What? You can say it, it's not a dirty word."
"That's debatable."
"Whatever. But yes, he's one of the people whose weak point I have identified and I've enlisted his support to ensure there will be voices in my favour once I announce my plan to negotiate."
Katara's smile fades.
"It is a dirty word", she muses. "What if it were you or me? What if someone forced you to do something because they knew… you know? About us?"
"Then I would have made a mistake and not covered my tracks enough", Azula simply answers.
"You're impossible."
At that, Azula actually turns to the side to look at her.
"That's life, Katara. Maybe not for the common people, but once power gets involved, that's just how it is. If you want to come out on top, you have to make use of every available option."
"It's not my life", Katara simply says.
"But it's mine", Azula shoots back. "There is no room for holding back."
"Some would call holding back honourable."
"You sound like Zuko. Or my uncle."
"It could be worse. I could sound like you."
Azula shrugs. "Maybe it wouldn't hurt you to be a little more like me."
It would make you stronger, she thinks. Just a little more like me. Without the mother who didn't love me. Without the lost war. Without the brother whose mess I always had to clean up.
Without hearing my father's eternal disappointment at everything I do.
Katara's biting remark dies on her tongue when she sees Azula's pensive expression, eyes staring at nothing in particular. It doesn't take someone of Toph's talents to realise Azula is hurting.
Instead, she glances at the sun and pushes herself off the ground.
"We should get going. Your meeting with the Minister of Commerce starts in an hour."
Azula takes the hand Katara extends and allows her to pull her up. By now, she knows enough to estimate how much Katara has correctly guessed.
Thank you for not saying anything.
The meeting with Minister Hono takes hours. Hours of fruitless discussion, irrelevant details. Explanations upon explanations. The minister clearly loves the sound of his own voice, and Azula hates it. But once she understands it, his plan to raise capital for the war effort has merit. Looking back, she wouldn't have needed to talk it through for hours, but she can't very well just let her ministers do as they please. They, more than anyone else, are in a position to undermine her reputation in the eyes of her people. Everything they do, they do in her name, and that means Azula has to look over their shoulders, check every last detail. Only then can she remain in control.
"Thank you for your time, Your Highness."
Finally.
"Just one more thing."
It's the fifth time he's thought of 'just one more thing'. Azula is just about ready to murder him. If Katara weren't in armour, if they were alone, she would lay a calming hand on her shoulder.
"Lord Chui has asked me when you will be honouring him with a visit to the new foundry. He and Mr Xin would like you to formally commence the opening."
Azula sighs. It's something she's put off for a while now, but she can't really afford to delay it much longer.
"Is my presence really that necessary? I'm sure they can make do without me."
"Of course not, Highness!", the minister hurries to assure her. "Whatever your wish is shall happen! Just…" He hesitates to continue. "It would be beneficial, Highness. I'm sure I don't need to remind you how much Lord Chui's opinion is valued."
Meaning, I can't afford to upset him. Why don't you just say it out loud?, Azula angrily muses. We both know that's what you mean.
"Fine", she sighs instead. "Tell them I'll be there tomorrow. Let's get it over with."
The tension leaves the minister's face. "At once, your Highness!"
He bows and hurries out of the room.
Once they're back, Azula angrily rips off her shoulder pads and flings them at the wall; hard enough that Katara jumps back in surprise.
"Ugh! May the spirits take them, and their foundry as well!"
She kicks the next best thing, a chair, and throws a fire blast at it for good measure.
"Do they seriously think I have nothing better to do than stroke their pathetic egos? Give them a pat on the back?"
"Azula…", Katara warily interjects, and Azula holds up a hand to shush her.
"Just don't."
But Katara isn't ready to give up that easily. Something's up, she knows it. Even for Azula's standards, this is unusually petty.
"What's the matter?", she insists. "You didn't throw a tantrum like this last week when you spent two hours listening to Lord Zhiro talk about his mines."
"What's it to you?"
"Believe it or not, I actually care about why you're angry!", Katara shotos back.
"Well, don't."
"Something is up, Azula, and you're not telling me what it is. Out with it."
"Nothing is up", Azula hisses. "And for the record, I don't 'throw tantrums'. Now drop it."
Katara changes gears. Time for a new approach.
"How am I supposed to protect you when you're keeping secrets from me?"
"You're not", Azula snaps. "Your services won't be required tomorrow."
"I'm sorry, what? Just because I asked? What the hell is wrong with you?"
Azula rolls her eyes. "No, dum-dum, of course not because you asked. I simply won't need you." She flops onto the divan. "What does it matter? Be glad you won't have to spend a whole day in that armour."
Katara angrily stomps down, and Azula is pretty sure that over in the dining room, a jug of water just spilled over.
"Out with it. Seriously. What's your problem."
Azula closes her eyes. "Nothing."
You insufferable, incorrigible, fucking… ugh! Katara clenches her jaw. What the hell do I see in her again? One moment I think we're making progress, the next she pulls… whatever this is. Against her will, a tear appears in her eye.
Deep breaths.
"Fine then. If you won't tell me, I'll take a guess."
Oh Agni, here we go. Must she be so dramatic?
"Does it have something to do with me?"
"No", Azula lies.
"Is there something wrong between us you're not telling me?"
"No again. Give it a rest."
Like hell I will.
"Are you afraid of something?"
"Look", Azula snarls, "as much as I enjoy playing Oracles & Questions with you, I don't have time for this."
Bingo. A satisfied smile tugs on Katara's mouth.
"So, what are you afraid of?"
"Nothing!"
She crosses her arms. "You're a bad liar, Azula."
That's it. I've had enough.
"You really want to know?", Azula spits. "Don't say I didn't warn you. But if you must know? It's you. You are the problem."
"You're scared… of me?"
The deflated, timid tone makes Azula's chest ache.
"Of course not. You don't scare me."
"Then what is it?"
Azula sighs in resignation. Somehow, Katara has a way of always getting her to say more than she wants to. It does have its upsides, she supposes – for one, would they share a bed otherwise? Share kisses over front line reports and ancient tomes? –, but right now, she wishes Katara would just take her word for once.
"Chui's Foundry", she begins slowly, "lies on the Razor Cliffs, on one of the outer islands."
Katara frowns. "So?"
"Do I have to spell it out for you? It's on an island. At the coast. Right next to the water."
She watches the realisation slowly dawn on Katara. It takes a moment, but when it comes…
"You're scared because… me and…"
"You and water", Azula confirms. "I simply can't risk bringing you out there, not with the entire ocean at your fingertips. But, going without a bodyguard is hardly a solution either. And of course, lastly, I don't trust this place enough to leave you alone at the palace. Not when we've drawn so much attention to you the last weeks."
The hurt is written all over Katara's face.
"You don't trust me."
Azula rubs her temples. "Katara, please. We've been over this: I'm the Fire Lord, you are – you have been – my prisoner. How can I be sure you won't be tempted by the possibilites? That you won't escape, or worse?"
"Trust me", Katara answers. "That's how."
"Katara…"
With no other idea, Katara does the only thing she can think of.
She kneels down.
Azula trails off mid-sentence as Katara lowers herself to her knees in front of her. Stares, lost for words, as Katara takes one of her hands between both of her own and looks up at her.
It feels odd, being down here, Katara thinks. It's a gesture of submission that sickens part of her. Another part of her just hurts, hurts for Azula's recognition, her approval. A third part quietly marvels at the intimacy of their pose.
She locks eyes with Azula. Looks up at her with a determination that makes Azula's knees weak.
"I swear."
The words ring out between them, seem to weigh down the air in the room, the air in their lungs.
"You swore to let me go when all this is done. I promised to protect you. If that's not good enough for you", the implicit accusation, the hurt dripping from Katara's words, sting in Azula's heart, "then I swear it. I will protect you, I will stand by you."
She squeezes Azula's hand.
"I believed you. Now you have to believe me."
"I do", Azula says weakly as the tension drains from her body. "I… thank you."
With their entwined hands, she pulls Katara up, bends down to meet her halfway. A kiss hardly seems enough to express her relief, she wants more, needs to pull Katara closer, anything to show what she can't put into words.
Thank you.
Their lips meet, the fire between them renewed, and Azula's kiss is hungry, burning up. Everything she feels about Katara, about the power she possesses, the overwhelming rush of power Azula herself feels upon realising the depths of Katara's loyalty to her, she tries to put into the kiss.
Together, we could be unstoppable.
"What's gotten into you?", Katara mumbles against Azula's lips, smiling. "If you kiss me like that, do I need to swear to you more often?"
"Just thinking", Azula mumbles back.
Katara enjoys the kiss a little longer before pulling back and looking up at Azula. "Thinking about what?"
"Us, of course. Just think of the possibilities, the things we could accomplish together… if only I'd known you earlier, if I could have brought you on my team to hunt the Avatar and my brother… we could be ruling the world right now! Who could stand in our way?"
"So that's what it's about, huh?" Katara abruptly yanks her hand back and stands up. "Why did I even ask… just so you know, if you want to fantasise about siccing me on my friends, you can damn well keep it to yourself!"
The tears are flowing again, and too late, Azula realises she's gotten carried away. But Katara isn't done yet.
"Is that what I am to you?", she accuses. "A weapon? A tool? Just someone powerful to exploit? When the time comes to let me go, are you going to find new reasons to keep me around? Well you can forget it!"
She stomps off, but Azula catches her wrist. Katara breaks loose and spins around, ready to fight, but Azula raises her hands in surrender.
"I'm sorry", she says, and maybe she finally understands what Katara said about apologies. "I promised, and I will keep my word. I mean it."
The words are thoroughly familiar, but saying them like she means them because she means them, not slipping into an all-too studied performative tone, is hard.
"What I said was distasteful and tactless. I'm sorry."
She's not very good at it. It still sounds stiff and learned. But her struggle is visible, audible enough, believable enough, that Katara knows what Azula is trying to do: mean it. Azula offers a hand, and Katara takes it, lets herself be pulled back and sits down next to Azula.
"I care about you", Azula admits. "I… admire you. All this", a relationship, an equal, the possibility of peace or defeat, "is new to me. I thought about us, and I just couldn't help but think of the potential, like any good strategist would do. It was a mistake."
Katara sighs. Tries not to think about how every time things are looking up, Azula says something nasty or thoughtless and they start fighting.
She's apologised. That's a start.
"I care about you, too."
She rests her head on Azula's shoulder and allows her to stroke her hair.
We're in this together now. For peace. For us.
A/N: Don't you just love melodramatic vows of allegiance?
