I stood with Seth last with the rest of the pack already phased and off into different sections towards the mountains of Canada and/or the Olympic Mountains.
"One thing before you go. Or a couple."
Seth's head angled as an indication of being intrigued, "Okay."
"Okay, we had talked about us and other things but we didn't fully talk about Sarah. How do you feel, honestly?" I inquired, picking at my fingernails.
"It's weird but… we're working with it. Or maybe it's mostly her fault, Gija's."
"I will never remember her name, no matter how many times you tell me." I chortled, "It is and she's giving me a headache."
"Sarah?" His eyebrows furrowed in confusion.
"No. The bitch." I clarified with a playful smile.
"She's making the veins in my eye throb, the Christine throbbing."
I snorted, "I made your eye throb."
"Yours is different. It's only in one eye, she makes both of them throb."
I snorted again, "Sarah's beautiful. I can't believe she did this. Fucking sick." I crossed my arms.
"Your mom would be proud of you, Nao. You know that right? Even with our failures. I know you know that."
"I know… still. I thought about her once and her name and just a subconscious memory I've hid. And now she involved something of her in this…"
"We'll be there helping in her demise of being ripped apart if anything happens to that baby girl. By the way where is—"
"She's in her crib with the lower side facing the wall so she can't climb out. I figured out how Mom and Dad kept me from climbing out and setting the place on fire with a sock."
"How?" Seth is bewildered.
"I don't know. I couldn't reach the knobs on the stove for a long time and I still almost caused a fire… you know what, I think it was my purple flames."
Seth snickered, he eyes were bright and he is so happy, this face was outshining the faces I have seen on his face in the previous lives. I'm so glad I came to my right state of mind and cut the act of pride and prejudice.
"So you bursting into flames would've been inevitable either way…" He pulled me close.
I wrapped my arms around his back and tucking my head on the junction of his neck, "It's like one of those hidden gifts that don't make sense but they do."
"If you say so." He kissed my temple, "Don't burn down the house until I get back and Sarah's at your dad's."
I kissed his cheek, letting him step away, his hand still wrapped around my right hand, I winked at him coyly, "Everything will be intact, Mom."
"Mom. That's a new one."
"Wait, come back. How do you feel about Sarah?"
"What? I love her, already. Why? I thought we just cleared that up."
"I rambled about my mom, not Sarah."
"Okay. So what else about Sarah than that I loved her?"
"Does it… really bother you… that I was letting her throw food around?"
His head tilted, "Not really. Not unless it's all the time, but once in a while."
I can hear her crying from across the backyard and more than several feet into the woods, "Okay… I.." I went to say that I had no idea what I'm doing but then that still wasn't going to help him finish his task right. I can't say that, something else but Sarah's crying and he had to go.
I have to do this. She's a baby, I've babysat many times, she's my baby and I have to come to terms with it and put on my big girl pants.
"Anything else?" he inquires searching my eyes.
"I love you." I murmured, wrapping my arms around his neck.
Seth smirked, his arms linked around my back rested on my lower back, "I know." I narrowed my eyes at him and he pecked my nose with a kiss, "I love you too."
Oh my, say it again. My mind gushed, I felt all warm and fuzzy inside like a school girl when he kissed me again before he disappeared from my sight. Phasing into a massive sandy wolf, smaller than Jacob and I combined but just a tad taller than Paul and Jared.
I tended to Sarah, immediately. I got her to calm down from almost alerting the authorities with her cry and got her to eat something, and then I gave her a bath which she enjoyed very much. Then I dressed her in a full body onesie, a little baby beanie, and let her bounce on my lap and she danced a bit too while I spoke to Carlisle on the phone on the current plans and temporary addition to the treaty.
The rest of the day passed by quickly with check ins with the Cullen's and watching cartoons and tending to Sarah. She is very active, very hyper and she's very smart. I'm pretty sure she was not into watching Mickey Mouse with the look she gave me when she watched a couple minutes of the show. Looked through the channels that were still suitable for her, I settled with SpongeBob and she was content with that. She was definitely my kid. I started to develop a routine to divide taking care of Sarah and helping out with patrol with getting some help from Bella, Esme and Rosalie combined with the weeks that followed. I made daily visits to Dad and living council members, imprints, and Charlie; patrol or no patrol, Sarah or no Sarah. No one has come back yet and Alice can't see the pack or it's participants in her visions.
A month passed and then another passed. I'm officially 23 years old… again. Sarah is going to be a year in 14 days and no one is back yet. I know their coming back, I can feel it.
So today I woke up before it hit 5 am, I got ready a full day of patrol before waking Sarah, I dressed Sarah for the weather. I swaddled my little bundle of joy like a burrito, and like clockwork she was asleep before I reached the woods. I spent half the morning walking around while Sarah slept and then Rosalie take her back to the house before noon hit. That day I had no luck and the next morning I got up early again.
I had a feeling to stay near the house and patrol the perimeter on foot, like someone was going to be coming back sooner than expected. Sarah was asleep within the first fifteen minutes of me walking around in the forest, and against my chest, it was dry today. The ground is wet but there was no indication of rain until probably later in the afternoon, I hope that was the case. Sarah would be wet by the time I got back to the house if it was a heavy downpour from the darkness of the grey names of clouds I have forgotten. Wow, maybe I should've went back to elementary school with all of these lives.
I miss Seth.
Bella appeared at my side with the stench of rotting sugar and a breeze.
"Something's wrong." She warned staring ahead of us.
"Huh?" I looked over at her to my right.
We came to an opening in the trees to a familiar scenery with Edward at the end of the driveway, turning to us. And then I felt it, something empty within Emily's cabin more than thirty feet ahead of me. Sam's newest truck in the driveway parked there and idling. That feeling was all too familiar.
"Do you think…?" I glanced over at Bella again.
She looked up at me with bright golden topaz eyes, "I don't know…"
I tightened my arm around Sarah, "Edward?"
"I can't hear him. I don't hear her. I smell blood." He reports quietly, calmly, absentminded, he was searching from the expression on his face. "I can't hear Gija either."
My blood began to boil within my chest, I let that feeling grow and it spread throughout my body as I walked across the street scanning the open area swiftly. Bella and Edward stayed equal amount of distance from the house as previously agreed unless it was absolutely necessary, I left Sarah in Bella's hands. Bella had enveloped herself in a dome of clear film the simmered under the sky, crystalizing and shifting like waves of water. She's a shield and she couldn't unlock that power before, we had a heated conversation over it like in 2009, she felt useless, and she needed to help she wanted to have an advantage. So, she decided to give up Paul to become a vampire to unlock it.
It was extreme and it was… insane but she was different. She was confident before, but I know that she feels powerful and it's a different kind of confidence and I hoped she wasn't going to get too cocky and later regret something or worse. I inhaled through my nose and there was a lingering scent of… rotten burning flesh. Sam and Emily's scent were also mixed in.
I smell that blood Edward was talking seeping from cracks of the little cabin house with faded and chipping polish for the wooden exterior. I know my soccer ball is on the roof somewhere.
"I can't hear anything from Emily… or Sam." Edward murmurs from his place at the end of the dirt driveway.
Just keep aware of Gija. I thought, and he hummed in confirmation quietly, I turned the doorknob of the front door.
It turned, unlocked and I swung the door open and everything in my body chilled to the cores of my bones. That revolting stench pierced my nose along with the blood, the front room containing the kitchen and dining room is dark.
Stay alert, Naomi. I focused on the boiling in my veins as I stepped into the house.
"Sam?" I inquired, listening to the silence that followed.
"You are not fit for the alpha title. Have you ever thought of that? Do you think anyone here would be thrilled to allow a sensitive girl to run a pack? You'd get everyone killed." Old Quil's words were ringing around in my head, haunting me at the worst moment.
I stepped farther, cautiously, into the house, the kitchen was clean expect for a single small frying pan in the sink, water was still floating around the bottom of the pan. My head turned towards the open space of the living room, and I froze in my place. The furniture was in disarray, one lamp was on surprisingly while being broken the other was in pieces and the cover was torn apart. Cotton and feathers and fabric everywhere, some of it was soaked in blood, pieces of the coffee table and end tables everywhere or impaled into Emily's torso.
Everything in my body chilled and numbed, disconnecting from my mind. There is blood everywhere.
Pooling in large puddles on the floor, soaking and staining the rug and wooden floor, slowly crawling along the wooden surface. I turned to a shape on the floor near me to my left at angle from my peripheral, Emily was staring back at me. Her head was staring back at me with her facial features contoured in horror and pain. Her body wasn't attached, her body parts not connected to her torso that was impaled with a long slab of coffee table, scattered around the floor and dripping with blood and torn fabric. And then I seen Sam's chest, open, a wide open cavity ripped into his chest exposing his insides, and his head barely attached to his body. That sinister icy fog creeping around every inch of the house.
"You'd get everyone killed."
How could this happen? How could I let this happen?
"Naomi." Edward calls from the front door.
"Hm?" I hummed, my head turning slowly in his direction.
I didn't like the expression on his face, "You're not going to like what I have to tell you."
And then I felt my body jolt and my eyes snap open to my alarm going off in my childhood home.
…
Naomi
may, 2006
…
I stared at the ceiling, I woke up in another changed reality, I was ripped from one reality into another… I sat up and turned off the alarm surprisingly calmer than I felt. But then again—all feeling is beginning to dissolve into numbness. I was in my room and by the pictures on my dresser, Jacob is my brother, and it feels familiar. We don't know the Clearwater's by the pictures… I inhaled through my nose sharply; this is getting dramatic, and Bella was an only child by the pictures. Pictures of Ren and Ryan's high school graduations, old pictures of mom and the deceased family members like the grandparents on both sides, some uncles, and aunts I didn't get to meet because they moved away and never came around or called.
Those pictures never changed, about my family expect for Jacob's addition and he looked just like me. I had a picture of Bella and Edward together, it looked recent with the light sunset glow mixed with the pale silver light of cloud cover, behind the curtains in Charlie's dining room where they stood in the archway in the living room. They looked happy, and Bella didn't look like she was uncomfortable if you looked hard enough and know Bella.
I laid back down. I laid there. I couldn't move. I couldn't stop thinking.
There was too much I had to think about. There was too much I had to do. I felt like I was going to implode and explode.
I remember the terror in my body. I remember the anger. I remember the feeling of being psychologically manipulated into thinking I was clawing away the chain when in reality, I ripped my own throat out. That memory alone has kept me in place looking at the spot where I writhed and clawed.
I was crestfallen, despondent. I was scared. I was angry. But I was so fucking scared.
It killed me inside to be so afraid of this fucking creature. I never see her coming and quite frankly, I don't know where to even begin to search for answers to kill the bitch. How was I supposed to protect the towns from her when she made me claw out my own throat? How was I supposed to protect anything if I couldn't even move?
I don't understand why, and I don't even know where to begin to understand the concept. I didn't even know where to begin. I was alone and most definitely going to fail some way or another, I can feel it. I haven't been given much of a fair chance so far already. I can't even figure out what to do to even prevent a change… I don't think I have much choice.
I remember the black box conversation. This is fucking ridiculous! I felt banging my head against a wall, an iron wall that would actually do some damage. I can feel myself beginning to lose my fucking mind.
A light knock to my door. "Naomi?" Dad calls from the other side of the door.
"Good morning, Dad." I replied.
"Good morning, butterfly. You have got an hour, I'm making breakfast. Get in the shower."
I sat upright again, and swung my legs over the edge, "Yes sir." I stretched and it was deeply satisfying.
I got up and showered and got dressed. I stared at the red apples for a brief moment while Dad bustled around the living room in his chair, searching for his novel to read while he ate. I grabbed one and cleaned it, I cut it up and sat down at the table. Jacob had already eaten and is showering now.
"Naomi." Dad says closing his book and setting it down on the tabletop halfway through eating.
I looked up from my empty plate, "Dad."
"Why haven't you killed her yet?"
I leaned back in my chair; I went to speak but he slammed his fist on the table top.
"Why haven't you killed her yet?" He demanded, steely.
I looked down at my lap.
"Look at me."
I leveled my eyes with him again.
"Why haven't you killed her? You killed Victoria with no problem." He slammed his fist on the tabletop again, "Why are you failing at this? You are stronger than this, Naomi Vivian Black." He pointed his right index finger at me, he is pissed. "You are an alpha. Why are you giving Old Quil and Gija the satisfaction at ripping you apart?"
I wanted to look away ass I cowered under his angry and steel gaze.
"Why?! Because Seth left? Naomi, he came back, and he chose you imprint or no imprint. I did not raise you to be ignorant or stubborn. How could you give up on him, on us, your tribe? I didn't raise you to be a coward, you are an Alpha, Naomi Vivian, wake up! This needs to end, do you hear me?"
He was ordering me to end this.
"Yes."
"Wash your plate. And get to work, do you understand?"
"Yes sir."
"Good." He nodded as a dismissal, I stood up and gathered my dishes together, "I love you, butterfly."
"I love you too."
I washed my dishes, and I left the little dull red rectangular house that never changed through every fucking wretched life. My Camaro and Jake's Rabbit parked in the driveway along with the black motorcycle in the bushes hiding it from the view of the house. I walked by my Camaro and trailed my fingertips along the smooth surface as I walked past.
"I promise I'll be back for a drive." I promised my non-animated vehicle with sincerity and nostalgia.
I began with a patrol, Sam, Jared and Paul were phased in, but they didn't want to share a mind with me. I let them phase out and I began my search. There were odious scent trails, dull ones and fresh ones from the west, north and the east. And it's going to rain soon. The thickness of the air pressure. I didn't have that much time left to track all of the scents and their source. But this was just like Victoria, her multiple-scent trails to throw us off, slow us down. But I was smart enough to know to follow the strongest scent trail, this wasn't Victoria, but she was probably just as weak.
Not to be cocky but there's something about my pride that decides to be a flicker or a bonfire, never in between and the most important selection of this ordeal. I had to silence my brain, if I thought too much and allowed myself to lose again, I swear to God I'll kill myself. The strongest scent would lead me right to her. I had to be smart about this, I needed to be smarter than her, smarter than Victoria, if this was going to work. I needed to be aware of changes or sneak attacks she'd throw my way if I got close.
Bitch was going to die, either fucking way.
I was going for a drive in Camaro, that's inevitable.
